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10 Creative Ways to Live Your Single Years Well

By: Guest Blogger

I sat on my bed, the tears flowing. I’d done it again, interacted with a nice guy and wondered if it was “him.”

I got home and realized how incredibly ridiculous I had been. I felt like an utter failure at this being “content in the single years” thing. A failure at keeping my focus where it belonged.

This could have been true of me two years ago or two months ago.

Hello, my name is Moriah, I live in Illinois where it’s sometimes too cold and sometimes too hot. I have a wonderful family, a great church, and delightful friends.

There are a lot of things that contribute to making me, but today it’s most important for you to know that I’m single and that I need Jesus.

Some days I’m not very good at being single.

It can be hard because I so badly want my own special someone. I don’t know how long I’ll be single, but I do know that I want to do well in this season.

Two years ago I penned 10 things I wanted to be as a single.

I’m happy to share this recently updated list with you today in the hopes that it encourages you. Encourages you because you aren’t alone in this journey. Encourages you because there’s so much goodness and grace in this singleness even though it’s hard.

This is my challenge to myself on this journey. If you have your own goals or lists I’d love to read them in the comments section below.

What Kind of Single I Want to Be

1. Dress well and dress your age.

Just because I don’t have a man to dress well for is no excuse for me not to put time and energy into my appearance. Dress with class and style.

2. Play with kids.

Laugh, have fun and chase the little ones around. Don’t abandon the world of little tykes because you’re too old or you don’t want to face the pain that you don’t have any little hands of your own to hold or any little hearts that are devoted to you with their “mommy” love.

3. Be full and overflowing with joy.

Singleness is not a reason to pout. It may be difficult at times but let gratitude in Christ fill you with joy and radiate that to others – life is much bigger than yourself.

4. Listen.

Always have time to listen to others, always. Listening is something you have the flexibility to do because you don’t have a household of your own that you are responsible for. So, take the time and listen.

5. Talk to guys.

Don’t abandon the world of males because none of them have married you. Treat them like brothers, not prospective mates. Be genuine, kind, and appropriate.

6. Offer your time to others.

You have flexibility, time, and energy that others with families don’t have. Volunteer someplace, help out busy moms, give your time.

7. Minister.

Use your gifts, talents, and skills for the kingdom. You may not currently be a wife and mother as you so desired, but you still have an investment to make.

8. Believe you have a purpose.

God’s called you to live for Himself, even if it’s in a way other than you dreamed. God is using you. Know it, live it, because it’s true.

9. Continue to learn.

You’re never finished and you’re never too old. You love learning, enjoy the process. Take a class, read a book, learn from a friend, etc.

10. Love life.

Life is a gift no matter what it looks like or how it’s shaped, so savor the moments.

Wrapping it up.

We as single girls need all the encouragement we can get. What is one goal that you can set for yourself as a single? Feel free to steal any of mine.

*This guest post was written by, Moriah Ortega. You can learn more about Moriah at her website. If you’re interested in writing a guest post for us check out this page. 

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  • Leah

    Love this. Very inspiring and motivating!

  • isabella loiola castelo branco

    Thank you Moriah! I’ll write down your goals, there are now mine too. =) I’m learning to develop passion for purity and put my expectations and trust in Jesus. As a single girl, I wanna be wholehearted in the way I live. <3

    • Moriah Mari

      I love your heart:)

  • Anna C.G.

    I think these ideas are great and the way you put it is excellent! I am 15 years old and s I’m a little under marrying age, however I want to prepare myself. I know God may keep me single for several years before I get married. My single years I want to use to honor Him and posts like these help me so much plus I get great ideas!

  • Shanae B

    I totally agree on the encouragement part! It can get easier and more difficult the longer you’re single. Thanks for sharing this! I was wondering if you all could ever do a post about how to respond to people who don’t want to let God be in control of your love life? I have people (and some relatives) who want to dictate God’s will for me in this area. It’s hard when people see your singleness as a problem.

    • Melissa

      Have you read Sacred Singleness by Leslie Ludy? I would encourage you to! It’s a great book, and she deals with people trying to dictate God’s will for you. I’m sure it would be a great help for you. 🙂

      • Shanae B

        Thank you, I will definitely be checking that out! 🙂

        • Melissa

          No problem! Hope it’s helpful for you. 🙂

      • Shanae B

        I finally read Sacred Singleness a little over a month ago, thanks for suggesting it!

        • Melissa

          You’re welcome! I am rereading it right now actually. 🙂

  • KatelynS

    Wow! What an amazing article! The thing that really stuck out to me was when you said “Don’t abandon the world of males because none of them have married you. Treat them like brothers, not prospective mates. Be genuine, kind, and appropriate.”
    I’m 16 and have quite a few good guy friends, but there are sometimes I find myself wondering if they could be “more.” I have tried to tell myself “just act like they’re friends (which they are), but thinking of them like brothers will definitely help my thought process and my actions! Thank you!

    • Moriah Mari

      Thank you for sharing! It is definitely not easy!! I’m cheering you on in this:)

  • Awesome points!

    • Moriah Mari

      Thank you:)

  • Tammy

    How do you handle that feeling of being a failure as you shared in the first part of the article? #relate

  • Paola Navarro

    Thank you so much for sharing this! I’m 29, single, and my country is Mexico. In my teenage years I did a similar list as well, and with God’s help, I have lived an awesome, happy and fulfilled life up to this day. But I can tell you it’s a real struggle, especially when society “pressures” you to do otherwise, or looks weirdly at you for not going about as they do. But it’s not impossible, because we have set our minds on our goal, and we are not turning back. The Lord is going before us as a mighty warrior. So, let’s go for it girls! We can do this!

    • Moriah Mari

      Thank you for sharing Paola!! 🙂

  • Maja Ćorić

    I have heard a great saying over and over again, and it’s time for me to start repeating it everywhere I go, it is “Just because you are not married or a mother, does not mean you have no worth”.
    Those two things are beautiful, but they are also a calling.
    If one is not called to marry and/or have children, one is not less worth then those who are. No, that simply means you are called elsewhere, or you will be.
    That said, I’d like to add to number 4. Listen: listen to the little inner voice, observe the “pull” and you will get where you are called to be.

  • Tammy

    @moriahmari:disqus How do you handle that feeling of being a failure as you shared in the first part of the article? #relate

  • Sarah

    @moriahmari:disqus
    I enjoyed your article and am sure at least some of these goals will become my own! so thanks very much for that!
    I would like to ask why you think we should dress well with class and style? I’ve never really been someone to dress up, preferring to choose my comfy clothes, so I was wondering what reason I should be dressing well is?
    I do have another question – I love that you say treat guys as brothers not potentials, but what exactly do you mean with brothers? What kind of brother? How are we to treat such a brother?
    Thanks very much!!


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