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3 Biblical Truths About our Sexual Design

By: Kristen Clark

Every single one of us is born as a sexual being. We’re all born with a sexual design given to us by our Creator. Our sexuality wasn’t an afterthought, but an intentional part of God’s good plan for us. He created us to be fully sexual and fully human from the moment we were conceived.

Sexuality isn’t a taboo topic for God, but one that He cares deeply about. He designed our sexuality and gave us an identity within it. He has a good plan for each of our lives and wants to help us embrace our sexuality according to His design. 

However, in the society that we live in today, sexuality has become an extremely confusing and complicated issue. Rather than looking to God’s Word to define us, we have become a people who define themselves. Rather asking God what His plan and purpose for our sexuality is, we have taken matters into our own hands. Rather than embracing our identity as described in Scripture, we have allowed our feelings and inner desires to dictate our identity.

God wants so much more for us.

He wants to redeem our sexuality and help us embrace His good and original design. 

In chapter six of our new book, Sex, Purity, and the Longings of a Girl’s Heart, we unpack 4 Biblical truths about our sexual design. In this post, I want to share with you a snippet of what 3 of these truths look like. We won’t have enough time to thoroughly dig into each topic, so I hope you’ll grab a copy of the book and dig into chapter six on your own.  

Truth #1: Sexual Identity is a God-Assigned Reality

“Instead of embracing our inner desires as truth, we must turn to God’s timeless and unchanging Word to guide us toward truth. Psalm 119:105 says, ‘Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path.’ As countercultural as this reality may be, our truest self can only be found within the Creator’s design for us. He designed us, therefore he is the only One who can define us. As John Piper says, ‘Neither whom we should worship nor who we are sexually is left to our preferences.’ God created you to be a female. He chose your gender for you. Your sexual identity is a beautiful, God-assigned reality.”

Truth #2: Marriage is a Covenant Between a Man and Woman

“Marriage was first set into motion by God when He united Adam and Eve as husband and wife (Gen. 1:28; Gen. 2:24; Mark 10:6–9). Marriage, as lovely as it is, is only a picture of something greater. It’s an earthly representation of something much grander. God placed the institution of marriage on the wall of this world as a representation of the gospel. ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church’ (Eph. 5:31–32).

God’s greatest purpose for creating marriage is to show the world an earthly representation of what Christ’s covenant relationship looks like with His Church. Christ is the groom and the Church is His bride. The male/groom is a reflection of Christ and the female/bride is a reflection of the Church (Eph. 5:22–24).”

Truth #3: Sex was Created for Intimacy within Marriage

“God has woven into the very fabric of our being a deep desire and longing to be intimately satisfied within a covenant relationship. Just as God created marriage to be a metaphor of Christ’s relationship with His Church, sex was created to be an earthly metaphor of Christ’s covenant love with His Church. There is no other act on this earth as intimate, vulnerable, and close as sexual intimacy. This physical act reveals a glimpse of how deeply God loves His people.

Not only is sex a beautiful celebration of the marriage covenant, God also designed it to deepen the bond between a husband wife. Dr. Slattery says, ‘When you look at what happens in our bodies and brains when you’re sexually intimate with someone, you’re actually bonding with that person in ways that you don’t understand—even at a neurological level.’

We were made for covenant. We were made for committed love. That is how God loves us, and that is how He designed us to love another within a covenant marriage. Sex is a spectacular and wonderful gift given to us in marriage as a picture of God’s love.”

Whether it’s gender, marriage, or sex — God created each of one of these things and has a lot to say about them in His Word.

He cares for us and has a good and beautiful plan for our sexuality. He wants to help us find true freedom by embracing His design for our lives. He wants to help us embrace our truest identity and purpose which can only be found in Him.

I hope you’ll grab a copy of Sex, Purity, and the Longings of a Girl’s Heart and continue learning about God’s beautiful design for your sexuality.

For now, I’d love to hear from you below.

  • When it comes to your understanding of sexuality, has your perspective been shaped more by the world or by God’s Word?
  • What do you find most challenging to embrace regarding God’s design for sexuality?

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8 Responses to 3 Biblical Truths About our Sexual Design

  1. Suzanne says:

    My view has been shaped more by God’s Word! I have had people in my life talk to me about this topic, and my mentor always points me back to God’s Word! I am very blessed!!

    The hardest thing for me to accept regarding my sexuality is, what to do with my desires and longings since I won’t be getting married for a while. I know what to do with them, but doing it, it is sooooo hard, especially when I’m tired. And then also, worrying about ‘what if I never get married, never have sexual intimacy, never have children’ etc. because that is my dream. I love the role and job of homemaking!!

    • Just let go. says:

      I feel the same way you do… (age difference might be here). I’m in a deep pit right now and I can’t get out. Sure I have my sunny days and can forget about my bad for a little while but the next time I have a cloudy dark day it hits harder and I feel worse… my concern is I’m not getting to the root of the problems but finding that root can be devastatingly scary, hard, and lonesome. I have days where I bask in the peace and understanding that God is in control and I’ll be ok, but sometimes I feel alone and by myself on this level and wish I had a deeper understanding of where I was failing so badly to make my life miserable! If I know and believe God is totally in control then why do I feel the way I do when I don’t feed these feelings? I have no doubt that Christ will fulfill me better then any man on earth can but the longing and hurt is to much to bear at times.

      • Suzanne says:

        I am sorry. What deep pit are you in right now? Can you share so I can maybe shed some light on it? Part of the reason I think we sometimes feel the way we do, even when we know the truth, is because we let the enemy get into our minds and feelings. We start believing his lies, and worrying too much, because that is where the enemy likes us to be. he likes us to feel alone, and not trusting God. Don’t let the enemy lie to you and get you down a road of ungodly sorrow. TRUST GOD!!! It is easier said than done, but I have found when I trust Him and actually believe and live that way, my life is so much more fulfilling, satisfying, and peaceful! Share your concerns with God! He wants to hear from you, even when you feel you are in a deep pit you can’t get out of. You can get out with God’s strength and grace. He will give that to you, just go to Him, be open and honest. Cry out to God! He will hear you! He is near to you, and even nearer in your brokenness!

    • Shanae B says:

      I know how you feel. It’s very hard, but clinging to God and reading scripture is the way to do it! I personally find that the busier I keep myself and especially my mind it makes it easier to not focus on such things!

  2. Shanae B says:

    Very spot on article! Very true what you said, especially about current society and the neurological bonding. Thanks for speaking out on this and can’t wait to read the book!!! 🙂

  3. Amanda Adams says:

    People being gay or trans is perfectly normal and natural, and you should be ashamed of trying to make people repress who they truly are. Live and let live.

  4. ionlyworshiphayleykiyoko says:

    Could this blog get any worse? The whole thing makes me want to scream with frustration. If my two mothers saw this they would be so sad that people can believe this kind of thing. Marriage is not strictly a covenant between a man and a woman. It can be a covenant between any combination of gender identities and that is natural. I don’t intend to hate, (especially since I’ve noticed that GirlDefined doesn’t rudely flame or curse at the lgbtq+ community, just be totally wrong about them and say bad stuff about them) but GirlDefined has some major problems. It really represents what is wrong with this world. I’m so disappointed that someone could really believe the things GirlDefined champions.

    • Jordan Wehrend says:

      Girl Defined speaks the truth. I only pray that God would open your eyes and heart to see how much He loves you


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