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December 9, 2019
An Important Message to the Sisterhood

WATCH VIDEO  She was depressed, alone, and couldn’t get out of bed. That’s when she came across one of our videos on YouTube. She began binge-watching GirlDefined videos from her bed. For the first time in weeks, she smiled. She realized she wasn’t alone. Her life wasn’t a waste. There was hope for someone bed-ridden like herself. Watch the rest of the video to find out what happened to this sweet girl from the GirlDefined Sisterhood… WATCH VIDEO 

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5 Simple Goals for Christmas Day

Goal #1: Have a Joyful Attitude It’s so easy to get bent out of shape about silly things on Christmas Day. Instead of allowing those disappointments to dictate your actions and attitudes, choose to have a joyful attitude. Choose to be grateful instead of upset, and joy will be a natural overflow. Goal #2: Focus on Others  My day, my gifts, my traditions, my plans — my, my, my! It’s so easy to get bogged down with self-centered thoughts on Christmas Day. We all know that there is no true joy in living to please ourselves. Instead of focusing on your desires on Christmas day, look for ways toFull Post

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December 6, 2019
Are You Caught in the Hustle and Bustle?

Are you serving others in your own strength? I have experienced this in my own life and I know it’s easy to fall into during the Christmas season. We become so consumed with preparing and serving that we forget to take time for the most important things in life. “But Martha was distracted with much serving. And she went up to him and said, ‘Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Tell her then to help me.’ But the Lord answered her, ‘Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, but one thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the goodFull Post

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December 4, 2019
Responding to Your Comments about Challenges During the Holidays

WATCH VIDEO  The holidays often bring on a variety of emotions. Joy. Sorry. Cheer. Sadness. Happiness. Grief. Regret.  Depending on your specific circumstances, the holidays can a great time or a really hard time. Today we want to respond to your comments about specific challenges many of you are facing.  Here’s what a few of you said. My family makes me cry. I get burnt out by all the parties. It’s hard to keep my mind on Christ in the midst of a Hallmark flurry. It’s hard to not get jealous of other people’s romantic relationships. My mom passed away the morning of New Year’s Eve, last year. IFull Post

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December 2, 2019
Getting to the Heart of Jealousy

My heart aches as I look at the eyes of one of my best friends. ‘Is she serious?’ I think. ‘Is this really happening to me?’ For a second I convince myself that this is not real. This is just a joke. This will all turn out the way I thought it would. Waking up the next morning, after a night of restless sleep, I had to conclude that this was not the case. To make a long story short: my best friend started dating a guy with whom I was really close friends. When she told me she was dating him, I was hurt and really jealous. IFull Post

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November 29, 2019
The Meaning Behind Each GirlDefined Shirt

It was a cool Texas day as we sat on the couch and brainstormed for ideas. The year was 2015. Two of our younger sisters were there with us as we tried to create the first-ever GirlDefined shirt. What color should we choose? Which design should we go with? How many should we order? After several hours of chatting and tossing around ideas, our talented youngest sister (Suzanna) suggested creating a simple white shirt with a custom hand-painted font on the front that simply said, “Girl Defined.” Of course! Our very first ever shirt should be a reflection of everything we believe in and stand for at GirlDefined Ministries.Full Post

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November 25, 2019
The Power of Living a God-Centered & Worship-Filled Life

The past few months of my life feel like they’ve been filled with a certain 7 letter word. This word flies in the face of my natural heart’s desire and is the opposite of everything the culture promotes. This word has challenged me, convicted me, encouraged me and given me incredible hope. When I focus on living this word out, I have such incredible rest, contentment and joy in my heart. I want to share this word with you in hopes that you can find the same hope, conviction, contentment and joy that I’ve found by *attempting* to live it out. The word is WORSHIP. The word worship holdsFull Post

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November 22, 2019
How to Get Your Spiritual Life Out of the Drive-Thru Lane

Another day was over and I had done it again. With sleepy eyes, I reached for the lamp on my nightstand and turned off the light. I fell asleep to the familiar feelings of guilt and regret. I had intended to spend some quality time with God that morning. I had pulled my Bible out and found a nice comfy spot to sit on the couch. I intentionally made coffee ahead of time…so I already had that in hand. I even set an alarm to remind me to get started. So what in the world happened?   Sadly, what happened this morning was what happened to me many mornings.Full Post

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November 20, 2019
Single & Longing for Romance During the Holidays

WATCH VIDEO The holidays can be the most wonderful time of the year and they can also be the most lonely time of the year. With chick-flicks and romance movies being released in droves, it may feel like everyone is in a relationship except for you. All you want for Christmas is a boyfriend. Is that really too much to ask? The two of us remember those days. We remember the loneliness. The jealousy. The wishing we had that someone special to kiss under the mistletoe. We get it. Yes, your single status may be more apparent during the holidays, but this doesn’t have to be a miserable timeFull Post

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November 18, 2019
Are You a Rule Follower or a Christ Follower?

Have you ever seen a mamma duck with her babies following in a neat little line behind her? It’s an adorable sight. As a kid, I loved going to the pond to watch the cute little ducklings waddle behind their mommies. Mommy duck jumps in the water. Baby ducks jump in the water. Mommy duck sits down for a nap. Baby ducks sit down for a nap. Mommy duck stands up and starts walking. Baby ducks start walking. These little ducklings have their eyes on their mommy and they copy her every move. When ducks behave this way, it’s totally adorable. When grown adults act this way, it’s seriouslyFull Post

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November 15, 2019
How God Transforms Broken Lives into Beautiful Stories

Our hearts can be broken in thousands of ways for this is a heartbreaking world. But the good news is that Christ can heal our broken and crushed spirit.  The One who will uphold us with the right hand of His righteousness cares for us abundantly and can wrap liniments around our wounded hearts. The One whose breath births galaxies into being also births healing into our broken hearts. Our brokenness can be a canvas to show God’s light to others. To us, broken things are despised as worthless, but God can take what has been broken and remake it into something better, something that He can use forFull Post

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November 13, 2019
A Message for Every Christian Girl

WATCH VIDEO We don’t know what you’re currently going through or what kind of trials you’re facing. But, as one fellow sister-in-Christ to another, we know this. You can have true hope and confidence in Christ and in God’s Word.  The two of us know that life can be hard. Really hard! We all face pressures, trials, and challenges of some variety. So what in the world are we supposed to do when the peer-pressure hits? What are we supposed to do when our circumstances seem to be drowning us? What are we supposed to do when life just doesn’t make sense? Here are several truths that have keptFull Post

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November 11, 2019
You’re Not Crazy for Wanting a Boyfriend

“So timely. It makes so much sense. Sometimes I feel like I’m crazy lol…” “…I know and agree with everything that was said, but it was good to hear it from someone else at a time when I really want to be held and loved by a guy. It’s nice to know I’m not alone on this journey…”  “SO GOOD!!!! Thank you! I’ve always struggled with having crushes on guys…” These are a few of the comments I received on one of my articles that was recently published (Why You’re Looking for Jesus in Your Boyfriend) This article’s main idea was to point girls to Christ’s perfect love instead of a guy’s imperfect affections. While I do believe that onlyFull Post

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November 8, 2019
15 Amazing Things You Can Thank God for Today

Life on earth is a far cry from perfect. In fact, it can often feel overwhelmingly negative at times. In my own life, I’m tempted to focus on the things that go wrong more than the things that go right. I find myself zeroing in on the negative stuff until my sight turns into a depressing tunnel vision. I can’t see anything good anymore because I’m so zoomed in on what’s not going my way. Ever been there? Honestly, it’s a depressing and sad way to live. There’s no joy in the negative tunnel vision…yet we all do it regularly. Since this is the month for giving thanks, IFull Post

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November 6, 2019
Christian Girls Ask Honest Question About Sexual Purity

WATCH VIDEO If I feel like I may never get married, is it okay to find sexual pleasure in other ways?  What’s the best way to tell someone I’m waiting for marriage to have sex?  How far can I go until becoming sexually impure?  The two of us want you to know that you’re not alone when you ask these questions. We’ve asked similar questions ourselves. When it comes to the topics of sex, purity, longings and personal struggles, we (as Christian girls) want true biblical help. We don’t want to stay stuck in our confusion.  In today’s video, we unpack all of these questions and more. Join theFull Post

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November 5, 2019
A Call of Action to Single Christian Women

I was one of those “undistracted singles” that was totally distracted by marriage. I spent half of my life totally focused on serving the Lord and the other half totally focused on finding my man.  That was Bethany Baird in her late teens and early twenties.  Somewhere in-between wanting to make the most of my single years and desiring to live an “undistracted” life for Christ, I got distracted. Really distracted. I so wanted to serve Christ, but I also really wanted to get married.  It wasn’t until my mid-to-late twenties that I finally understood and began to truly live out God’s call for my life.  Do you knowFull Post

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October 30, 2019
Talking Kanye West, Christianity, and Jesus is King!

WATCH VIDEO Kanye West recently dropped a brand new album title, Jesus is King!  The two of us have been talking a lot about Kayne and his new album and his newly declared faith in Jesus. We’ve been asking many of the same questions that you’ve been asking. Is he a genuine Christian? When did all of this happen? What is his new album all about?  The two of us don’t know Kanye West personally. We haven’t had a one-on-one conversation with him. We don’t know the true reality of his heart. What we do know is that God has the power to transform any heart! It doesn’t matterFull Post

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October 28, 2019
A Complicated Mess Made Beautiful

I plopped down on my bed, exhausted from the week’s events. I then began trying to unravel my mess. A mess of emotions, thoughts, intentions, words spoken, and implications. As I sat there replaying every word of our conversation, trying to glean any hint of interest or non-interest, I finally broke down. I couldn’t figure it out. No matter how hard I tried, I could not understand what was going on in my heart. I was trying to figure out if I really liked a guy, and if he actually liked me. But the more I psychoanalyzed every aspect of my situation the more helpless and entangled I felt.Full Post

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October 25, 2019
To the Girl Who is Discouraged and Losing Heart

Have you felt like a weight has fallen over you? Are you stuck in a place in life where nothing seems to be changing? Where the same thing happens day in and day out and you’re not getting anywhere? Have you prayed and begged God for something and not seen an answer? Do you feel like you’re being held back, but can’t put a finger on what it is that’s got a hold over you? Maybe you are a young woman with no friends, in a new city and a new job and every night you go home alone. You long for fellowship and a purpose beyond just working yourFull Post

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October 23, 2019
Should Christians Do Anything For Halloween?

WATCH VIDEO  Christians all over the world have chosen to respond to this holiday in a variety of ways. Some Celebrate it to its fullest! Some acknowledge the pagan origins and choose to avoid it altogether.  Some stay away from death, demons, & darkness, and only participate in the more innocent parts. Others opt for Fall Festivals and other activities. No matter where you fall on the spectrum, it’s important to think through this Holiday and make a wise, informed, and biblical decision. WATCH VIDEO 

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October 21, 2019
Lessons I Learned From My First Year of Marriage

The day went by in a blur. I tried my absolute best to enjoy every moment and soak up the day, but it went by so fast. Everything started and ended in what felt like such a short amount of time (thankfully the wedding was live-streamed so that I can go back and relive the ceremony anytime I want).  WATCH LIVE STREAM Looking back at photos from October 14, 2018, I so wish I could go back in time and relive each one of the moments. I loved my wedding day. I loved getting married to David Beal. I loved our ceremony. I loved our first hours together asFull Post

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October 18, 2019
My Journey of Trusting God Through Disappointment and Unfulfilled Longings

Some days you dance and some days you cry. This past year has been filled with both for me. Many of you know my story of infertility and the two early miscarriages Zack and I experienced 6 years ago. It has been a long journey, but God has been so faithful to give us peace, comfort, and even joy in the midst of our unfulfilled longings.⁣ But as we approached our 8 year anniversary a few months back, the most unexpected thing happened – I found out I was pregnant. ⁣ This news completely shocked Zack and me and we couldn’t believe it. My heart was filled with aFull Post

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October 16, 2019
4 Attitudes that Keep Single Women from Thriving

WATCH VIDEO  She’s thirty-six, single, and thriving. If you had asked her as a twenty-one-year-old what her future would look like, she would have described a beautiful life filled with children, a godly husband, and Jesus. But that’s not exactly how her story turned out. Despite her future playing out contrary to her dreams, Madga (our amazing Polish friend) has learned how to thrive right where God has her as a single woman. However, this didn’t come without walking through some challenging valleys of surrender and trust. Throughout her personal journey, Magda learned how to fight against the wrong attitudes that didn’t help her to trust God with herFull Post

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October 14, 2019
Why You’re Looking for Jesus in Your Boyfriend

I’ve had a crush on a guy (I’ll call “Sean”) for over 3 years. It’s bad. What’s worse is that we’ve only spoken one time. He picked up my grapes in the college cafeteria when I dropped them. I thanked him. End of story. Somehow, I still have a hard-core crush on Sean. I stare at him from across the cafeteria at meals. I look up his picture in the college directory when I’m feeling lonely. I imagine us having this amazing relationship that would make you crazy jealous. But it’s all fake. It’s all in my head. Sean probably doesn’t even know my name. To him, I’m probably justFull Post

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October 11, 2019
7 Habits of a Strong Christian Woman

As Christian women, I think there’s an unspoken narrative playing in our minds that goes something like this: “Christian women shouldn’t be strong. Christian women shouldn’t be brave and courageous. Christian women should remain passive and mind their own business.” This is false. Very false. Just look at some of the godly women in the Bible. Esther was a strong and courageous woman (Esther 1-5). Or how about Abigail (1 Samuel 25)? That girl was brave. Just look at Mary the virgin mother of Jesus (Luke 1-2). That girl had courage. The godly women of the Bible do not portray a picture of weak and wimpy womanhood. There are many strong,Full Post

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October 10, 2019
How to Trust God When Life is Really Challenging 

WATCH VIDEO Do you ever find yourself struggling alone, crying on your bed, or just feeling depresses about your future? This is a reality for most of us at some point in our lives. We all go through hard times. We all struggle. We all face hardship. We all face loneliness. We all face the temptation to worry about the future. When we face difficulty, what will we do with it? Where will we place our hope? In Christ or in something else? To help us deal with the future in a helpful and God-honoring way, we need to learn how to truly TRUST God. WATCH VIDEO

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October 7, 2019
Becoming a Girl of God-Worship Instead of Self-Worship

Jennifer’s tears rolled down her cheeks as she struggled to express her thoughts. “I just don’t feel like God sees me or cares about me. He’s never answered a single one of my prayers and I never see Him working in my life. I don’t have many friends, my parents don’t give me the time of day, and my health is awful. I just can’t see any reason to live for God or praise Him. I honestly think He has forgotten about me.” The tears continued to fall and Jennifer seemed to be growing more depressed and discouraged as she thought about her life. From her perspective, life wasFull Post

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October 2, 2019
5 Lies Girls Believe About Singleness and Dating

WATCH VIDEO  Lies about guys. Lies about singleness. Lies about dating. We’ve all been there. We’ve all had that moment or season where we’ve looked to something other than God to bring us satisfaction. In the end, it never works. It never satisfies. Instead of staying stuck in the lies, stuck in the trap, and stuck chasing after the wind, we need to get back to truth. Let’s open up God’s Word and combat 5 of the most popular lies that girls believe about singleness and dating. WATCH VIDEO 

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September 30, 2019
3 Truths to Remember When Life is Hard

Life often feels like a long string of waiting. Waiting for change. Waiting for a breakthrough. For healing. A boyfriend or husband. Waiting for God to be faithful and trying to believe He still is. Waiting for the day when pain doesn’t greet you first thing in the morning and stay with until you go to sleep. Waiting out the ache of a broken heart, hoping that “one day it has to heal, right?” I’m in a season of waiting right now. I’m waiting for God to answer prayers I’ve prayed for years. Trying to fully live my single years, instead of looking at my very single status withFull Post

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September 27, 2019
How to Deal with Your Heartache After a Breakup

I think the hardest part of a breakup is the mornings that follow it. The nights are hard too, but the mornings, I think that’s when the pain is the rawest. When you’ve spent the past 6-8 hours (or 5 if you’re anything like me) sleeping in a blissful state of ignorance, and then you wake up and for the first few seconds everything is fine. And then your brain wakes up and reality comes in, and it hits you hard. Another day of trying to make it through. Another day of trying to move on. I’m writing to you because I’m currently going through a breakup. It’s beenFull Post

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September 25, 2019
How Important is Attraction in a Romantic Relationship?

WATCH VIDEO  Most single women will immediately judge a guy based on his outward appearance. Is he cute? Am I attracted to him? Is he hot?! These are often the first questions we ask ourselves. We’re immediately interested in really good looking guys and less interested in guys that don’t fit our “physical criteria.” We’re slow to take interest in an average looking guy, even if he has a great personality and godly character.  Yes, being attracted to your future spouse is an important factor, but how important should it be?  What’s the balance? Is attraction really as crucial as we make it out to be? What should we, as Christian girls,Full Post

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September 23, 2019
What it Takes to THRIVE as a Single Girl

Looking back on the many Valentine’s Days I spent “alone”, there is one specific day that stands out to me more than others. I was single (as I was for much of the first 30 years of my life) and I was headed to the grocery store to pick up my favorite drugstore mascara. I pulled into to the parking lot and headed into the store. Little did I know that I was about to wade through a sea of starry-eyed men who appeared to be floating on clouds of roses and dark chocolate covered strawberries. In days past, this kind of scenario would have been heart-wrenching. I wouldFull Post

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September 20, 2019
7 Life-Giving Truths for Overcoming Worry and Fear

As a single girl (before I married Zack) I had so many fears and worries running through my head. “What if I never get married?!” “What if no guy ever likes me?!” “What if don’t get married until I’m 40?!” Fear. Worry. Lack of trust. All of my worries were completely in vain too, because 3 years later Zack (my now amazing husband), asked me to be his wife. Since I was no longer worried about “getting married,” I figured I was in the clear of my worry and fear issues. Not even close. Little did I know how much hard work and money it took to plan a wedding (much lessFull Post

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September 16, 2019
Getting to the Heart of a Guy Obsession – Part Two

If you missed Part One of this post, you’re definitely going to want to click here and read it before reading Part Two. Kari unpacked several lies and truths about what is truly at the heart of a guy obsession. Part Two builds on that foundation, so take a quick moment to read Part One. You won’t regret it! We, as single people, must broaden our view of how God builds his kingdom. I have found that many women (including myself) who overestimate the importance of marriage tend to underestimate the value of competence and hard work. Here’s what I mean. God has uniquely gifted each of us toFull Post

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September 13, 2019
Getting to the Heart of a Guy Obsession – Part One

I was once obsessed with a guy. I stalked him on social media. I stalked his family on social media. I purposely went places where I knew I would be around him, and whenever I was around him I made sure I was in his line of sight. The thing was, it seemed to be working! He always made a point to talk to me and was so kind to me. I really thought he was as interested in me as I was in him, only to realize he was being nice to me so he could get close to a friend of mine and ask her out! ThisFull Post

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September 11, 2019
How to Stop Worrying About What People Think of You

WATCH VLOG Everyone has an opinion about everyone else, right? We give each other labels, call each other names, and put each other in certain categories depending on what we think of that person. It can be so easy to get caught up in the trap of WORRYING about what everyone says. Worrying about what they think of us… worrying about what they might tell someone else about us… worrying if they don’t think we’re good enough or pretty enough. The list is endless.  Instead of staying trapped in the fear of what others might think of us, let’s find freedom! WATCH VLOG

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September 9, 2019
5 Verses about God to Bring You Hope

Several years ago I came across a verse in the Bible that slowly become my life verse. From my highschool days, to my first relationship days, to my breakups, and now to my marriage, these verses were/are my go to.  Trust in the Lord with all your heart And do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He will make your paths straight. Proverbs 3:5-6 These verses were a HUGE comfort and reminded me that God would make my paths straight. He had the plan. I just needed to trust Him completely.  After sharing those verses with friends and on social media, IFull Post

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September 6, 2019
Why You Can Be Joyful in Hard Times

Recently, I decided that I wanted to get a really good tan. In order to do that (without having to sit in the sun all day), I decided to go to the tanner. Now, I am not recommending going to the tanner or sitting out in the sun all day because I know the sun’s rays are harmful. Nor, am I saying that you need to be tan to be beautiful or have more worth or value. I am simply using this story to help make my point.  Okay, moving right along. Once entering the tanning room, I realized that the tanning bed looked like a coffin with clearFull Post

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September 4, 2019
Social Media and the Christian Girl | What You Need to Know 

WATCH VIDEO We decked ourselves in makeup and fashionable clothing, climbed up on our rooftop, and had our younger sister capture photo of us. A few hours later the photos were edited and uploaded to Facebook. The two of us just sat back and waited for the likes and comments to come pouring in. This was the teenage reality of Kristen and Bethany back in high school. Facebook was our first ever real exposure to social media. At this point in time, we didn’t have a good grasp on how to use social media in a God-honoring way. Fast forward a few years and the online world has exploded.Full Post

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September 2, 2019
Dealing with Depression During the College Years

I walked off of the graduation stage believing that all my anxiety, depression, lack of happiness and the negative feelings I had experienced through grad school were going to disappear immediately. Little did I know… reality was about to hit. I have always been both a straight-A student and a planner. During my four years of college, I made sure I graduated before all my classmates. I did it with honors, a dissertation, and an award. To do that, I had unhealthy habits. Yet, I thought it was fine. That I could do it all. So, when I decided to move from Mexico to the U.S. to pursue aFull Post

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August 30, 2019
5 Helpful Ways to Study Your Bible Each Day

I sat down to read my Bible one morning and just stared at the cover with a glazed look. Where do I even start? What do I even read?! This book is HUGE! How in the world do I “study” it? If you’ve ever had a moment like mine, this post is for you. I’ll be totally honest. I’ve gone through seasons of my life where I wasn’t sure what to read in my Bible, or even how to read it. I’ve gone through seasons of feeling totally disinterested in God’s Word altogether. As I’ve looked back on my Bible reading habits over the years, my “low” moments always haveFull Post

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August 26, 2019
God is Still Writing Beautiful Love Stories

Imagine a love story that’s lasted over fifty years and is still thriving. The couples still loves each other deeply. They still want and desire to be married. They still love holding hands and kissing each other. They consider themselves to be best friends and lovers. Imagine the faithfulness. Imagine the self-sacrifice. Imagine what a beautiful picture of true love a marriage like this would represent. This is what many of us long for. A love that truly lasts. A love that can stand the test of time and the rocky waters of adversity and come out stronger on the other side! A love that defies that odds ofFull Post

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August 23, 2019
Practical Advice for the Christian Girl Going off to College

I met up with my sweet friend, Rebecca (cute girl in the photo), yesterday who is about to move away for college. She’s 19 years old and just finished her freshman year at a local university. She’s planning to transfer to a different university this year which will take her away from her hometown, family, friends, and church. We got together to chat about her life and this new (big) transition that’s about to hit. We talked about church, friends, roommates, romance, campus life, how to stay plugged into the Word, and a lot of other things. As we chatted, I was honestly really impressed with Rebecca’s spiritual visionFull Post

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August 21, 2019
Qualities We Each Looked for in a Husband

WATCH VIDEO Before we got married to our (now) husbands, there were specific character qualities and traits that we each prayed for. We weren’t looking for perfect guys (obviously, because we’re not perfect!), but we were looking for godly men who loved the Lord, cared about people, and knew how to keep the fun in life. In today’s video, we each share 5 different qualities that were important to us (some are spiritual and some aren’t), as well as 3 fun facts about our husbands. If you’re currently unmarried and hope to get married someday, you’ll find this vlog encouraging, helpful, and even a little humorous. WATCH VIDEO

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August 19, 2019
Single Girl, Are You Waiting for Marriage to Change You?

I’m thirty years old and still believe the big fat lie. The lie that keeps single girls discontent and married women unhappy. What is the lie? The big fat lie that I’ve believed throughout my life is this; My sinful heart will change when my circumstances change. When my life’s circumstances look different, then I will magically transform into that epic godly woman I’ve always wanted to be. Somehow Satan has snuck in and dropped a big fat juicy lie directly in many of our laps. We believe the lie that our sin isn’t really the problem. It can’t be! It must be someone or something else causing usFull Post

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August 16, 2019
Why Chasing After Guys Didn’t Make Me Happy

I went through one of the hardest breakups in my life when I was twenty years old. I was one week away from being engaged when everything suddenly ended. I never saw the ring and my “almost” husband exited my life forever. As difficult as that season was for me, God was graciously sparing me from entering into a marriage that wouldn’t have been good (and a few years later I ended up marrying Zack!). The full story is too long to share right now, but I remember feeling a distinct void in my life right after that heart-wrenching breakup. Instead of turning wholeheartedly to God to fill my void,Full Post

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August 14, 2019
Our Thoughts on Josh Harris and the Purity Movement

WATCH VIDEO  In the wake of Joshua Harris’s recent public statement that he is no longer a Christian, many of you have emailed us asking for our thoughts on the matter. Like many of you, we grew up reading Josh Harris’s books and were greatly influenced by his bestseller, I Kissed Dating Goodbye. We are products of the so-called “purity culture” and have seen firsthand the positives and negatives of this movement. Our goal in making this video isn’t to bash Josh, his books, or the purity movement — but to take an honest look at the pros and cons of what has happened over the past 20 years,Full Post

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August 12, 2019
Single and Surviving or Single and Thriving?

I was one of those “undistracted singles” that was totally distracted by marriage. I spent half of my life totally focused on serving the Lord and the other half totally focused on finding my man. That was me, Bethany Baird, in her late teens and early twenties. Somewhere in-between wanting to make the most of my single years and desiring to live an “undistracted” life for Christ, I got distracted. Really distracted. I so wanted to serve Christ, but I also really wanted to get married. It wasn’t until my mid-to-late twenties that I finally understood and began to truly live out God’s call for my life. You knowFull Post

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August 2, 2019
God will Never, Never, Never Leave You

As I was walking on the railroad tracks near my home this morning, I came across a mamma possum carrying her babies on her back. I stopped and watched her waddle across the path. One of her babies had fallen off and was frantically running back and forth trying to find her. He was on the opposite side of the railroad tracks and they were just too tall for him. He couldn’t find her. She waddled into the bushes leaving him behind lost and helpless. Have you ever felt like that baby possum, lost and alone in a world you don’t understand? I know I have. We live inFull Post

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July 31, 2019
Q&A: How to serve God, being an introvert, and modesty hacks

WATCH VIDEO  We are keeping it down-to-earth in today’s vlog. You submitted your questions through Instagram and we picked a handful to answer. We are digging into everything from being an introvert to modesty hacks, to music, to serving God, to creativity! If you have questions that you’d like answered in the next Q&A video, leave your comments below. WATCH VIDEO   

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July 29, 2019
Responding to Anxiety and Stress in a God-Honoring Way

I remember the moment distinctly: it was the day before I was scheduled to take the ACT, and I was, as Anne of Green Gables would say, in the “depths of despair.” I usually get nervous when it comes to a test of my abilities, whether a normal school examination, giving a speech for a debate round, or a new social circumstance or event. But this feeling about the ACT was different. There was so much potential for this exam, so much riding on my score, that I felt that I was completely insufficient for the task. It was like I knew I would “fail.”I believed the lies thatFull Post

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July 26, 2019
Overcoming the Fear of What Other People Think About You

I couldn’t fall asleep. My heart was heavy and my mind was spinning with one thought – my imperfections. The day hadn’t gone very well. I thought of all the people who seemed better than me and I was overwhelmed by emotions. Eventually, I fell asleep. But mere sleep cannot remedy a struggle. Our culture today has a very loud voice and it wastes no time in telling us what they think we should be. In grocery store checkout lines and on billboard advertisements we see what the world claims to be “perfection.” Not to mention, friends, family members, peers and even people in the church throw expectations uponFull Post

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July 24, 2019
How to Keep Guy Friends in the Just Friends Zone

WATCH VIDEO  Guy friendships. They can be so great and so complicated all at the same time. Have you ever had a guy friendship that ended with hurt feelings and a lot of drama? The two of us sure have. If we, as Christian women, aren’t intentional in our friendships with guys, they can often end up somewhere that we really never wanted them to go. In today’s video, we share two strategies that can radically change the way you manage your friendships with guys. WATCH VIDEO 

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July 22, 2019
Marriage Isn’t about Making All Your Dreams Come True

I grew up just like any other normal American girl. I watched princess movies and read fairy-tale stories. From a young age, I quickly formed this idea that romance and marriage were the essence of a “Happily-Ever-After.” And They Lived Happily Ever After… That’s how every movie ended. If riding off into the sunset with your prince charming was the essence of happy, I sure wanted that. Fast forward about 25ish years and I’m a grown woman. I’m a new bride married to my best friend and the man of my dreams. Although I have a pretty incredible husband, I’ve learned a few crucial things about marriage during thisFull Post

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July 19, 2019
How to Be the Type of Friend You Wish You Had

I remember crying alone one night in my room feeling sad because I desperately wanted more friends. Deep down I wished that somebody would take a genuine interest in building a deep friendship with me. Even though I was surrounded by people in my family and church, I still felt left out. I still felt alone. Have you ever felt that way? Most of us long for deep friendships. And that’s normal. God created us to be relational beings. God designed marriage, family, siblings, friends, and community for a reason. We are relational because God is relational (Genesis 1-2). Longing for deep, meaningful, and vibrant friendships is a normalFull Post

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July 17, 2019
Our Top 6 Favorite Christian Podcasts

WATCH VIDEO We love podcasts. They are an amazing way to access great content from anywhere at any time. If you aren’t an avid podcast listener yet, we hope you will be by the time you finish this video. Here are a few of our current favorite Christian podcasts:  Relatable with Allie Stuckey  Compelled with Paul Hastings  Truth in Love with ACBC Revive Our Hearts with Nancy Demoss Wolgemuth ESV Everyday in the Word The Briefing with Albert Mohler WATCH VIDEO

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July 15, 2019
8 Ways to Stand Strong Through the College Years

Going off to college is probably one of the most trying and difficult times in a young woman’s life. The challenges, pressures, temptations and lack of experience more often than not end up taking many Christian girls down. Sadly, Christian girls aren’t coming out stronger (in a biblical sense) but weakened and further away from Christ. I guess that’s why one of the GirlDefined readers e-mailed us asking us to write on this very topic. “How do I keep my faith at school because I know how challenging it will be. Please do a blog about this.” She’s right. It will be challenging…but not impossible. I love that weFull Post

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July 12, 2019
You Are Not Your Job Title

I stuffed over 400 envelopes yesterday. For seven hours, I folded letters, placed them in envelopes, and sealed them. At the end of my eight-hour shift, all I had to show for it was two boxes of filled envelopes. I felt slightly triumphant…but also incredibly disgusted. While I’m thankful to have a summer internship, I can’t help but feel a little insignificant. As I do my work—whether it’s stuffing envelopes, creating spreadsheets, or labeling papers—I sometimes wonder if I’ll ever do something important with my life. Will I ever get to achieve something valuable or attain true success in my career? Or will I be stuck at a desk,Full Post

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July 7, 2019
10 Tips to Keep Your Heart Focused on Jesus

It seems like everything in the world is trying to distract us from truly focusing on Jesus. Social media, movies, music, friends, sports, school, and work etc. While those things aren’t harmful in and of themselves, it seems many of us have found ourselves obsessed with everything but our relationship with God. I’m just as guilty as the next girl. I’ll admit that it’s really hard to keep my heart focused on Jesus. I find myself distracted and not living for what really matters. I don’t want this to be my story though. I’m sure you don’t either. To help us fight the battle and intentionally work on ourFull Post

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July 5, 2019
What I’ve Learned from Mentoring My Younger Sister

As most of you know, I’m the second oldest of eight kids and I grew up in a really big family. With five girls and three boys (and most of us being taller than 6 feet), we’re quite the sight walking into a restaurant together. I have honestly loved being a part of such a large and fun family over the years. However, being the oldest of all the girls, I’ve always felt the weight and responsibility of being a good influence on my younger sisters. I knew they were watching me. I knew they were learning things (whether good or bad) from the personal choices that I made. Full Post

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July 3, 2019
Why Should I Go To Church?

WATCH VIDEO  We grew up in the church. Every Sunday, we were there. It was a big deal to our parents and we rarely missed a week. When the two of us grew up, we had a choice to make. Would we continue going to church on our own? Was it still important for us to go?  That is the question we hope to answer today. We want to show you God’s founding of the church in the book of Acts and unpack why we’ve chosen to still attend church today. WATCH VIDEO 

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How to Break Free From Habitual Sin

WATCH VIDEO  We get it. Life can feel really discouraging when you’re stuck in habitual sin. You wonder if you’ll ever be free. If you’ll ever conquer. If you’ll ever move past it. The two of us have experienced God’s amazing forgiveness and power in our own lives. We want the same for you. God wants the same for you.  In today’s video, we’re sharing 4 biblical steps to help you break free from habitual sin. These steps have proven true in our lives and have given us the Christ-centered tools we’ve needed to truly walk in freedom. WATCH VIDEO 

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July 1, 2019
3 Lies Christian Good Girls Believe

I’m a Christian good girl. You know: the kind who’s never rebelled against her parents or gotten involved with the wrong crowd. The kind who’s busy doing ministry, who posts Scripture verses on Facebook and Christian quotes on Instagram stories, and has memorized a book of the Bible . . .  You know the kind I’m talking about. On the outside, I’m good. On the inside beats a heart selfish, sinful, broken, and in desperate need of Jesus. For years, I put my identity in my external goodness. But deep down, I saw the difference between who everyone thought I was and who I knew myself to be. AFull Post

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June 28, 2019
3 Lies I Believed About Fighting Sexual Sin 

It happened…again. Then again. And again. This will be the last time! I promised myself. I was tired of wrestling with sexual sin and wanted to be free from this particular struggle. I was convinced that I just needed to try harder — that I would find freedom if I just focused more on pursuing purity. I tossed up a half-hearted prayer and asked God to give me victory. This is the last time. I reassured myself confidently. Unfortunately, it wasn’t the last time. My battle with lust raged on. It wasn’t until a few years later that I actually found lasting victory from that particular sin. If you’reFull Post

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June 26, 2019
Answering Your Assumptions about Us

WATCH VIDEO  The two of us do our best to be as real, honest, and vulnerable with you all as possible. We share many of the highs (Bethany’s relationship journey and wedding) and we do our best to share the lows (Kristen and Zack’s infertility journey). However, there is only so much “realness” that can be had online. Social media is not a real-life relationship and that makes it hard to truly know the person on the other side of the screen. I’m sure you’ve made some assumptions about the two of us (it’s hard not to!). So for today, we created a fun video for you to clarify,Full Post

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June 24, 2019
Newlyweds Answer Your Questions about Love, Purity, & Marriage

Dāv and I just hit the 8-month mark. That’s an extremely short amount of time in the big scope of things. I get that we’re not going on the big 10, 20 or 30. We haven’t even hit our one year anniversary. Honestly, that’s why we’re writing this blog. Being a newlywed is one-hundred percent fresh on our minds because… well… we’re currently newlyweds. There’s something valuable about us opening up and sharing our experiences while we’re still in this stage. Yes, there is a ton of value from those who have walked the road and can look back and say “here’s what we did right and here’s whatFull Post

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June 21, 2019
Life as a Wife: Learning to Chase Truth Instead of Following My Emotions

I woke up this past Tuesday with a smile on my face. I looked over at my sleeping husband and silently thanked God for blessing me with such a faithful, loving, and godly man. This day was a special day. It was our 8th wedding anniversary. For some couples that may seem like a short amount of time, but for us, it feels pretty long. In fact, long enough to celebrate and get really excited about! Marriage has been a wonderful gift for Zack and me, but as I look back on the past 8 years, I can’t help but laugh a little. We’ve come a long way. BothFull Post

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June 19, 2019
Who Should Do the Pursuing in a Relationship?

WATCH VIDEO  You like him and you want a relationship with him. The problem? He isn’t pursuing you. When the two of us were single, we found ourselves in this position time-and-time again. I’m sure you can relate. You notice a guy. You like him. You want to start a relationship. But nothing is happening. It’s pure silence from his end. Should you make the first move? Should you pursue him? Should you ask him out on a date? Should you slide into his DM’s and let him know he’s on your mind? Let’s jump into these questions and see what God’s Word has to say. WATCH VIDEO 

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June 17, 2019
5 Bible Verses Every Girl Should Know

Different moments, experiences, challenges, and joys in my life have resulted in me latching onto specific verses in Scripture. Verses that I’d studied or memorized. Those verses became my lifeline. When it came to singleness, I always turned to Proverbs 3:5-6. When it came to purity of heart, I always turned to Psalm 51:10. The list goes on. I intentionally memorized and meditated on specific passages that I knew would help me when I needed them most. Let’s just be real for a moment. The Bible is big. It can be hard to know where to turn to when you’re dealing with a specific challenge in your life. AlthoughFull Post

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June 14, 2019
How to Discern if a Guy Has Godly Character or Not

When I was a single woman, I remember people telling me things like, “be sure to marry a man of godly character!” Or, “make sure you know his true heart.” Or, “don’t settle for anything but a genuinely Christ-focused man.” Okay… I would think to myself. I appreciate the advice, and I agree. These are all good things that I want in a future husband. But how in the world am I supposed to know what a man of godly character actually looks like (in real life)? How do I discern the difference between a really nice Christian guy and a guy with a genuine Christ-like heart? And in all seriousness,Full Post

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June 12, 2019
Sexual Past: How to Tell a Godly Guy?

WATCH VIDEO Sex. Purity. Virginity. These are some loaded topics that can bring about a ton of different emotions. The two of us had the privilege of sitting down with popular Christian YouTubers, Paul and Morgan, to hear their thoughts on these important topics. Morgan opened up with us and shared her testimony of struggling in an unhealthy relationship, to eventually meeting and marrying Paul. Her story is filled with redemption and hope. WATCH VIDEO

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June 10, 2019
What Advice Would you Give to a New Bride Going on her Honeymoon?

I’ll never forget that moment. The moment my brand new husband and I ran through the aisle of sparklers and hopped into our getaway car. We waved goodbye and headed towards our honeymoon suite. The drive from the venue to our honeymoon suite was filled with excitement, nerves and a sigh of relief. We were married. Husband and wife. We made it! Looking back on those amazing two weeks in the mountains of Colorado, I can’t help but smile. We were newlyweds. Everything was so… new. Every moment and experience was like a great big adventure. Minus a few bumps along the way (canceled flights, lost luggage, unable toFull Post

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June 7, 2019
Is Masturbation a God-Honoring Expression of Sex?

Masturbation is one of those words that causes a lot of people to feel awkward or embarrassed. Some people don’t even like to say the word out loud. However, this doesn’t mean we’re not thinking about it on the inside. We, as Christian women, have a lot of questions about masturbation. Is it a sin? What does God actually teach about it? Am I wrong for wanting it? Although the Bible never uses the word masturbation, it’s not silent on this issue. The Bible has a lot to say about sex, pleasure, intimacy, immorality, and purity because God cares deeply about these issues. He is the author and creatorFull Post

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June 5, 2019
Why Porn is a Counterfeit Version of Intimacy

WATCH VIDEO  Porn is more accessible today than at any other time in history. It’s now estimated that “35% of all internet downloads are porn-related.” “Porn is a global, estimated $97 billion dollar industry, with about $12 billion of that coming from the US.” Porn is wildly popular, but is it actually helpful to us? Is it giving what we truly want? Is it leaving us more satisfied relationally than before? As Christians, how should we think about pornography? Since God is the creator of sex and intimacy, let’s look at what He has to say. WATCH VIDEO 

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June 3, 2019
Sister, Your Worth is Not Found in Your Size

I looked it the mirror as I spun around in a dress I hadn’t worn in a while. Immediately, I began to panic about my reflection. Why doesn’t this dress look the same as it did before? I thought, staring at the mirror. Disgusted, I threw the dress onto my bed as I began to cry. The tears continued to fall down my cheeks as I glanced at my closet. Finally, I put on something else to wear and rushed to class, with worries plaguing my mind as I walked. Though I may be the exception to the rule, I feel like females constantly worry about their size, starting withFull Post

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May 31, 2019
When Standing for Truth Causes People to Hate You

With close to 9 million views on YouTube, it’s our most popular video. The only problem? We didn’t make it. Unfortunately, this highly viewed video was created by another YouTube channel to mock GirlDefined. With our online presence growing each year, the opposition is growing as well. As hard as it is to be the recipients of such blatant ridicule, we know the battle isn’t actually against us. The real fight is a spiritual one (Eph. 6:12). It’s a fight for God’s truth and the gospel of Jesus Christ. Keeping this bigger picture in mind is what enables us to continue standing for God’s truth here at Girl Defined.Full Post

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May 29, 2019
Christian Teen Q&A: Modesty, School, Favorite Books

WATCH VLOG  “What tips do you have for finding modest clothes on a budget?” “Are you reading any good books right now?” “What did you do for school?” “Can you explain what your personal time with Jesus looks like each week?” These are actual questions that we’ve received from Christian teen girls. Since we get a lot of questions like this, we thought it would be fun to bring on our teen sister, Rebekah, to answer some of them. After doing a poll on Instagram, we pulled your most popular questions and asked them to Rebekah. What today’s vlog to find out what Rebekah has to say about modesty,Full Post

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May 27, 2019
Girl, Are You Willing to Surrender All?

She was tall, blonde, blue-eyed and lived in a tiny town in Austria. My nana was a beauty and a sweetheart. Having lived her entire life in this small European town, she often wondered what the rest of the world was like. Marriage was probably her best hope of leaving her small Austria town, the only problem, there were no eligible men to marry. Little did she know that God would bring someone halfway across the world to sweep her off of her feet and bring her to America! Yep, that’s my grandpa. My grandpa was serving in the US Military and was assigned to her small Austrian town.Full Post

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May 23, 2019
Hannah’s Story: Struggling to Figure out Life

Have you ever asked the question, “What’s life all about?” I know I have.   In fact when I was seventeen, I not only was asking this question, I was really struggling with it.       Up until this point in my life, I had spent my time doing school, working some summer jobs, going to church, spending time with friends and family – you know, the normal teenage life.  But in my free time, I participated in something that was a little unique. You see, when I was 12 years old, I signed up to participate in the National Bible Bee. The National Bible Bee is a program forFull Post

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May 22, 2019
My Story of Overcoming Social Fear and Worry

WATCH VIDEO From a young age, Ellissa avoided one-on-one conversations, parties, or large social gatherings because she was fearful and anxious about talking to people. She labeled herself as “shy” and just assumed she would always be this way.  But after years of hiding behind this label, she came to a place where she really didn’t like the person she had become. She didn’t like having shallow relationships and was tired of feeling totally awkward in conversations and social settings. So, she decided to take some serious action to overcome her social fear and learn how to build deep relationships. Watch her inspiring story by clicking the link below. WATCHFull Post

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May 20, 2019
Sex and the Single Christian Girl

Don’t think about it. Don’t talk about it. Don’t do it. That is the thought process that many single Christian women have when it comes to the word “sex.” Instead of viewing sex through a healthy biblical perspective, we often view sex in a scary, confusing, distorted, negative, dirty and/or unhelpful way. My prayer is that we can change that thought process. Instead of waiting until you’re dating or engaged (or even married) to gain a helpful biblical perspective, begin that process now. When single women understand a truly biblical perspective of sex, they realize that sex isn’t the end goal. They realize that a deep, intimate, all-knowing relationshipFull Post

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May 17, 2019
What Every Married Woman Needs to Know About Sex

When it comes to addressing the topic of sexual intimacy and sexual desire, most of the posts we write on this blog are geared toward single women. This is because the central focus of our blog is to equip single women to gain a biblical understanding in all areas of life. However, we also get a lot of emails from married women who follow GirlDefined, so we thought a post written directly to our married sisters would be helpful too. I (Kristen) have been married for almost 8 years now to my husband, Zack. One of the areas of sweet blessing and sanctification that we have both experienced withinFull Post

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May 13, 2019
Join the Movement of Women Chasing Truth

It’s time, ladies. It’s time to become brave women for God. Women who stand firm on truth. Women who study God’s Word. Women who care about theology. Women who unapologetically embrace our identity as God’s daughters. Women who are unashamed of what the world may think of us. Women who understand that we are Christ’s ambassadors. Women who live in the reality that this is only our temporal home. It’s time to become women who live for Someone more worthy than ourselves. Instead of allowing life to happen to us, let’s be proactive. Let’s be intentional. Let’s fix our gaze on Christ and chase hard after our Savior. OurFull Post

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May 10, 2019
Why Sexually Charged Novels Never Truly Satisfy

She was beautiful. He was handsome. She desired male attention. He wanted some fun. She longed for romance. He wanted adventure. She wanted passion. He wanted pleasure. They meet…go on a date…and it doesn’t take long before their relationship turns intensely sexual. As you read their story, your inner passion and excitement ignite in an explosion of sexual longings deep within your heart. You want what they have. You want a steamy romance. You want a sexual adventure. This is the storyline of thousands of novels that have gained the ever-growing popular title of “erotica.” These novels come in all shades and colors and all have one common intent:Full Post

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May 8, 2019
Overcoming the Trap of Living to be Liked

WATCH VIDEO  Living for the approval of others is something that we all struggle with. Whether it’s at school, the workplace, church, or through social media, it’s something every single one of us will face. The two of us have wrestled with this throughout our entire lives. We often lose sight of God and begin focusing on gaining the approval of others. When we do this, we begin to measure our worth and value on what others think of us. That is not the way God intended for us to live. Instead of being enslaved to the opinions of others, let’s find true freedom in living for Christ. WATCH VIDEO 

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An Honest Conversation About Saving Sex for Marriage

WATCH VIDEO  It’s time for an honest conversation about saving sex for marriage. You asked and we’re answering. The two of us (along with our husbands) sat down and talked about our thoughts on saving sex for marriage. We answer questions like:  Why did we save sex for marriage? Was it worth it? If we could go back in time, would we do anything differently? If you’ve ever wondered if it’s worth it to save sex for marriage, this video is for you. WATCH VIDEO 

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May 5, 2019
How Writing a Book on Sex Helped Me as a Newlywed

First off, I never ever imagined I’d write a book on sex. Secondly, I never ever imagined that I’d write a book on sex as an unmarried woman. Who does that? I’d never had sex and yet I was writing a book on sex. It’s a little strange sounding. I know. Looking back on the researching, writing, editing, and reviewing of Sex, Purity, and the Longings of a Girl’s Heart, I am absolutely convinced that God used the writing process of this book to prepare me for marriage. Writing a book on sex was the best preparation for becoming a wife and lover to my husband.   In theFull Post

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May 3, 2019
3 Biblical Truths About our Sexual Design

Every single one of us is born as a sexual being. We’re all born with a sexual design given to us by our Creator. Our sexuality wasn’t an afterthought, but an intentional part of God’s good plan for us. He created us to be fully sexual and fully human from the moment we were conceived. Sexuality isn’t a taboo topic for God, but one that He cares deeply about. He designed our sexuality and gave us an identity within it. He has a good plan for each of our lives and wants to help us embrace our sexuality according to His design.  However, in the society that we liveFull Post

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May 1, 2019
Sexual Longings and the Source of True Satisfaction (Part Four)

WATCH VIDEO  If a girl is going to be single for her whole life, does that mean she will never have sex at all? This question gets right to the heart of sexual longings and true satisfaction. It’s a question that many of us have probably wondered or asked at some point in our lives. We want to know if the fulfillment of our sexual longings is a “must have” in order to experience true satisfaction. In this video, we answer that question. We dig deep into the fact that we were created by God to find ultimate satisfaction in a deeply personal and vibrant relationship with Him. We also show you threeFull Post

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April 30, 2019
Celebrate! Sex, Purity, and the Longings of a Girl’s Heart is Here!

We are so excited to announce that Sex, Purity, and the Longings of a Girl’s Heart: Discovering the Beauty and Freedom of God-DefinedSexuality officially released today!!! Today is a day of celebration. A day to celebrate all that God has done and is going to do. We are in awe of His incredible grace and mercy in our lives and this book is a testimony of His faithfulness. Our prayer is that this book will show you the beauty and freedom of God-defined sexuality. Get to know, Sex, Purity, and the Longings of a Girl’s Heart! Check out the official video trailer for the book. Download the first chapter for free. Access the FREE 7 Day Sex, Purity,Full Post

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April 29, 2019
Why We Wrote Sex, Purity, and the Longings of a Girl’s Heart

WATCH  VIDEO  Writing a book on God’s design for sexuality wasn’t exactly a lifelong dream of ours . . . but when we saw the hundreds of emails flooding our inbox from the Girl Defined sisterhood asking tough questions about sexuality, a fire was ignited within our hearts. When our publisher asked us to write a third book, we knew exactly what it needed to be about—sex, purity, and the longings of a girl’s heart. Although this book has been the most challenging and laborious by far, it was well worth it. God’s design for sexuality is powerful, beautiful, and incredibly freeing. As we’ve seen God’s truth transform our own brokenness into beauty for HisFull Post

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April 26, 2019
How to Deal with Secret Sexual Struggles

My heart was pounding. My hands were sweating. I knew I needed to be honest about my struggle but it was the last thing in the world I wanted to do. Especially to my parents. However, as scared as I was of being honest, I couldn’t bear the weight of my secret any longer. As a teen, I had been really struggling with my thought life for a while and lust seemed to be my constant companion. These sinful thoughts and imaginations also lead me down the path of regular masturbation. I tried to stop many times, but couldn’t seem to break the pattern in my life. I knewFull Post

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April 24, 2019
Purity: The Right and Wrong Way to View it (Part 3)

WATCH VIDEO Looking back on our lives, the two of us can clearly see where we adopted some unhelpful and unbiblical perspectives on purity. If you grew up in a Christian home (or religious home), you can probably relate. Instead of viewing purity as a lifelong pursuit motivated by a desire to honor Christ, many of us view purity as a core part of our identity. We unknowingly categorize people as “the pure ones” or “the impure ones.” However, this mindset couldn’t be further from God’s heart and desire for us. WATCH VIDEO

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April 22, 2019
Was Being a Virgin on my Wedding Night Awkward?

I was a thirty-year-old virgin on my wedding night. That isn’t a shock to any of you who’ve followed my story. In fact, many of you sent me emails and DM’s before I got married asking me if I was nervous about the wedding night. I responded to your questions through a blog post titled: Am I Nervous About the Wedding Night? Today I want to answer the dozens of e-mails and DM’s I’ve received since getting married. It seems like most of you want to know if being a virgin on my wedding night was awkward. Was I excited or terrified about the wedding night?? I’m going toFull Post

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April 19, 2019
The One Thing Christian Girls Don’t Know About Sexuality

I was shocked when they announced the title of the next book study that we would be doing. I was sitting in a room in my church next to Zack, surrounded by other small group leaders. “This is a conversation that we need to have more often in church.” My pastor said. “The world is talking about sex, but the church is often silent. We need to change that.” He went on to share how struggles with porn addiction, adultery, sexual promiscuity, and uncontrolled lust were shattering church families and individuals within our own body. “That’s why it’s crucial for all of us, as leaders, to equip ourselves withinFull Post

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April 17, 2019
God’s Design for Sexuality (Part Two)

WATCH VIDEO  Sexuality is something that impacts our lives in huge ways. However, it’s often a topic that we, as Christian women, know the least about from a Biblical perspective. We are all created as sexual beings…but do we understand God’s purpose and intention behind our sexual design? Understanding the why behind God’s changes everything! Sexuality was designed to be an earthly metaphor of a much greater spiritual reality.  WATCH VIDEO 

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April 15, 2019
Purity is so Much More than a List of Rules

I was that girl. The girl who grew up in church, saved sex for marriage, wrote letters to her future husband, and tried to do all of the “right” things a good church girl should do. In fact, I even saved my first kiss for marriage. Check. Check. Check. I was marking off the boxes that a pure girl should check off. I was following the rules and being “pure.” Looking back on my 30 years of life, I see a stark contrast in the way that I used to view the concept of purity to the way that I view it right now. As much as I hateFull Post

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April 12, 2019
Girl, You Were Made for Intimacy

My wedding day was less than three weeks away. I could hardly wait to finally marry the man I had already pledged my life and love to. My longings for marriage, intimacy, and a lifelong companion would finally be realized. As the days drew closer, my love for Zack grew deeper. I longed for the moment when I would truly be his. I longed to share all of me with all of him. I couldn’t wait to finally become one. Whether you’re single or married, you’ve probably felt that same deep desire for companionship, oneness, and intimacy. You’ve probably felt that inner longing to be fully known, cherished, andFull Post

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April 10, 2019
Sex and the Christian Girl (Part One)

WATCH VIDEO  Being honest and open about our sexual struggles is something many of us don’t want to do. It’s much easier to put on the mask and pretend that everything is fine. However, what we need to remember is that the first conversation surrounding sex and sexuality started a long time ago. It started way back in Genesis 1 and 2. In the very beginning, we see that God intentionally created every aspect of the world. He took great care in creating the trees and the animals. He cared about every detail and made everything perfect. After the animals, trees, and skies are perfectly created, God then focused on His most magnificent creation. The male andFull Post

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April 8, 2019
Lust is a Girl Problem Too

I crawled into my bed and turned on the lamp. It was late. I was tired. But that didn’t keep me from reading my favorite genre of books, Christian Romance Novels. I justified my actions and convinced myself that these were innocent and clean. What harm could they do? One by one I devoured these books. Rereading the extra “spicy” scenes over and over again. I put myself in the characters shoes and imagined the story was my own. As single, high school aged girl, I imagined that I was the one being wooed and pursued and swept off of my feet. When the story finished, I would layFull Post

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April 5, 2019
Our Sexual Longings and Desires Have Been Distorted by Sin

I still remember the struggle like it was yesterday. I was single, in my early twenties, and fully aware of my sexual longings and desires. Waiting to experience sexual pleasure until marriage felt like an impossible task to me. I knew God was calling me to fight for purity in my heart, mind, and actions, but it felt too hard. It seemed impossible. Almost like a cruel waiting game. Why would a good God give me these strong sexual desires as a single woman with no outlet to express them in?! With frustration in my heart, I allowed my mind to wander to sinful places. Sexual thoughts flooded myFull Post

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April 3, 2019
Sex, Purity, and the Longings of a Girl’s Heart [OFFICIAL TRAILER]

WATCH VIDEO As the culture around us seeks to normalize things like pornography, erotica, and casual sex, you may be feeling immense pressure to conform. In our brand new book, the two of us share honestly about our own struggles and victories and dig into topics such as: A Biblical understanding of your sexuality God’s good design for love, passion, and sex Why your longings for intimacy are a good thing How to conquer lust in your life How to deal with secret sexual struggles Practical help for embracing a life of purity How to find ultimate satisfaction in Jesus and much more. We hope you’ll grab a copyFull Post

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April 1, 2019
5 Practical Ways to Guard Your Heart

He was one of the godliest guys I knew. From similar ministry goals to the same taste in music, we had so much in common. He challenged me to follow Jesus and inspired me with his love for God. It didn’t hurt that he was also very good-looking. I’d had crushes before, usually admiring from a distance or stalking him on social media. But this time, he was the one reaching out to me. Pursuing me. Or so it seemed. We lived in different states, so most of our communication was through email. Every time his name popped up on my phone screen, I couldn’t help the ear-to-ear grin spreadingFull Post

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March 29, 2019
5 Signs Your Social Media Has Become an Idol

My alarm goes off. I rub my tired eyes not wanting to wake up. I roll over in bed and reach toward my nightstand in the dark. It’s here somewhere….oh — got it. I grab my phone and unplug it from the annoyingly short charger cord. The bright light from my phone half blinds my sleepy eyes. But I’m determined. I must…check…my…social media. Half asleep, I begin scanning the latest posts and comments. Like a robot set on repeat, this routine becomes the default for my mornings. Sound familiar to you? I am embarrassed to say that this pitiful scene has been the default method for many of my mornings. CheckingFull Post

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March 27, 2019
How We Handle Pushback and Rejection

WATCH VIDEO  It’s no secret that our YouTube channel gets a lot of pushback. We get comments from people on a regular basis telling us to stop what we’re doing and to shut down our channel. We face pushback. We face hate. We face rejection. In today’s vlog, we talk openly and honestly about the rejection we experience. We want you to know that it’s not always easy. So why do we continue doing what we do? Why do we continue to produce videos? Why do we continue to speak the truth? Here’s why. WATCH VIDEO 

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March 25, 2019
Finding Whole in a World of Searching

We live in a world of searching. We can trace this reality all the way back to that fracture in the garden. The moment when a man and a woman chose against God’s instruction as they reached out towards a forbidden fruit. What once was whole ruptured into two and thus began the search.   Sometimes I try to imagine what it would feel like to be truly whole. What it would have been like to walk beside God in the cool of the morning in that place of paradise.  I imagine myself bursting at the seam.  This tangible overflow of everything that I was created to be would bleedFull Post

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March 22, 2019
Chasing Truth: Being a Girl Who Fearlessly Pursues God’s Word

WATCH VIDEO  In a world where truth is determined by personal opinion and cultural trends, it’s becoming more and more challenging to discern what’s true and what’s not. If we, as Christian women, don’t anchor our lives in God’s unchanging truth, we’ll get swept away in the tidal wave of confusion. At Girl Defined ’19 you will discover how to become a woman who boldly and fearlessly chases God’s truth in your life. We’ll be unpacking popular questions such as, How do I speak the truth in love to my friends? What if I’m hated for standing up for what’s right? How do I become a woman who fearlesslyFull Post

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March 20, 2019
Christian Girl, Live for Something Greater

WATCH VLOG We live in a generation where we, as women, are increasingly being told to focus on our dreams and our dreams alone. We’re encouraged to push everyone and everything out of the way. Nowhere in Scripture are we told to, “follow our hearts.” “Live for self.” “Shove everyone else aside.” We are told to do the opposite. “Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, thereFull Post

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March 18, 2019
Living with Purpose as a Single Girl

Extended years of singleness seems to be a growing trend in our culture. Due to a variety of reasons, most young men and women aren’t getting married as soon as they’d like to. As a woman who didn’t get married until thirty-years-old, I can relate to the struggles, sorrows, and difficulties that accompany those extra unwanted single years. Although I didn’t live those single years out perfectly, I learned a few things that were extremely beneficial to me during that time. Whether you are single or married these tips will encourage you (or help you to encourage the singles you know) to live with intention and purpose during thisFull Post

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March 15, 2019
Resisting the Seduction of our Sexualized World

I was chatting with a friend recently who shared an eye-opening experience with me. Being a huge music fan herself, she’s always on the lookout for new and inspiring tunes. One of her other friends had sent her a song to check out, which they had been raving about for days. Within seconds of listening to it on Spotify, she was instantly captivated by how incredible the voice of the singer was. She clicked repeat. And then repeated it again. After several days of playing the song over and over, she naturally memorized the lyrics. One morning while getting ready for the day, she was singing the song quietlyFull Post

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March 13, 2019
Promoting Godly Manhood in the Midst of Toxic Masculinity

WATCH VIDEO  Toxic Masculinity is a common phrase we hear today. It’s essentially used to describe a man who is embracing “manhood” in selfish & harmful ways. However, as evil as many men have been toward women, we need to realize that masculinity (in general) isn’t the core problem here — sin is. Sin (rebellion against God’s design) has distorted manhood (and womanhood) in so many ways and what we see isn’t often a biblical picture of God calls us to. Yes, it is right and good to call out the sin of evil men — but let’s not swing so far to one side that we forget thatFull Post

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March 11, 2019
Daughter of the King, You Are Beautiful!

The midday sun streamed through the windows of my best friend’s living room. The gentle hum of laughing and talking was interrupted by my friend’s older sister: she was a college sophomore home for Christmas break and was looking at a photo book of her senior pictures. “Girls, I need to say something, so listen up. Teenage girls are way too hard on themselves and the way they look. I used to think I was fat and ugly, and looking back at these pictures now as a 20-year-old, I realize that I was actually gorgeous!! So stop attacking yourselves and know that even when you feel like I did,Full Post

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March 8, 2019
Fight Temptation Like a Girl With a Sword

It was late and I was exhausted. My head hit the pillow and I was ready for a good night of sleep. I closed my eyes and exhaled. Ahhhh Finally some rest. But then it happened. My mind was suddenly assaulted with thoughts that came flooding in unannounced. Worry, fear, and anxiety gripped my heart as my mind wandered into various unsolved challenges I was facing in my life. I knew there was nothing I could do to solve any of those real-life problems right then. But the reality of the situations seemed overwhelming at the moment and everything in me wanted to obsessively think about it. I triedFull Post

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March 6, 2019
How We Found Godly Women to Mentor Us

WATCH VIDEO  Over the past few years, the two of us have come to realize (more than ever before) that life is not meant to be lived alone. God didn’t create us to fly solo. We desperately need wisdom and input from the wise people in our lives. The Bible makes it clear that we need to surround ourselves with wise people if we want to become wise. Proverbs 13:20 “Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm.” The Bible also makes it clear that life isn’t about making our name great. It’s about making God’s name great. We need wise input toFull Post

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March 4, 2019
Hope for the Christian Girl Suffering from a Chronic Illness

I didn’t want to miss this opportunity. Migraines had pulled me down one too many times and I wasn’t letting them have the upper hand on this day. I pulled myself out of the hotel bedroom. I walked towards the mirror. It didn’t look good. I grabbed my makeup case, loaded up the concealer, and lathered on a few extra coats of mascara. Extra mascara always helps me look less sick. There’s just something about dark lashes that makes one look alive. The clock was ticking. I needed to get out of the room. With my head literally pounding and my body feeling incredibly nauseous, I walked out ofFull Post

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March 1, 2019
Pursuing Friendships in the Wake of Rejection

“I gotta go straighten up, I’m having the girls over tonight,” she said as we got off the phone. I sat there with the phone pressed against my ear long after the call had ended. She was having her friends over and I wasn’t invited. Throughout life, each one of us has experienced exclusion. From classmates chatting excitedly about this weekend’s sleepover to friends planning get-togethers without you to coworkers talking excitedly about last night’s dinner in the break room. This particular conversation on the phone, however, stung more than usual. The woman on the other end of the call was my childhood best friend. Over the past fewFull Post

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February 27, 2019
God Made You Beautiful (no matter what other people say)

WATCH VLOG Beauty is one of the biggest issues that younger and older women wrestle with. It can make or break you depending on your perspective. We’ve personally had our own struggles with beauty over the years but found incredible freedom through God’s Word.  3 Truths that have personally transformed our view of beauty and how we view ourselves: God Designed Me, So He Defines My Worth. God Handcrafted Me to Look Just the Way I Do. I was Created for God’s Glory Psalm 139:13-15 “For you [God] formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.Full Post

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February 25, 2019
Single or Married and the Proverbs 31 Lady

Ten years ago I memorized the majority of Proverbs 31. As a twenty-year-old single young woman, I wasn’t exactly sure how to implement what I was reading. I wanted to become like this woman and put her incredible heart and lifestyle into action, but I was single. I wasn’t married. I didn’t have a family. I didn’t have a household to take care of. Instead of dismissing this passage and ignoring its wisdom, I took out my pen and made some notes in my Bible. As a single gal, I noted my six big takeaways and began praying that God would one day make me that kind of woman.Full Post

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February 22, 2019
How I Found a Godly Woman to Mentor Me

I wanted to text her for several weeks but kept putting it off out of fear. What if she says no? What if she’s too busy? What if she just doesn’t want to do it? I knew my hesitations were rooted in the fear of rejection, so — before I could talk myself out of it again, I quickly started typing out a text message. After re-reading my message several times, I clicked send. I knew this was a good decision, and I reminded myself to trust in God for whatever happened. Asking an older, godly woman to mentor me was something I knew I needed to do. IFull Post

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February 20, 2019
Personal Thoughts About Our YouTube Channel

WATCH VIDEO  We’ve been thinking a lot about our YouTube channel over the past few months. We’ve been thinking about the style, the way we present, the content, and the purpose of our channel. As we’ve been evaluating our channel (and as we’ve received constructive criticism and feedback from many of you) we’ve decided it’s time to make some updates and changes. We’re really excited about this! So, starting next week, you’ll notice some updates to our presentation style, set, and content.  WATCH VIDEO 

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February 18, 2019
Why Girl Friendships Need to be a Crucial Part of Your Life

I get along so much easier with guys. They’re easier to talk with, easier to laugh with, and they don’t get caught up in the drama. Is it wrong that I prefer having close guy friends over close girlfriends? -Anonymous Girl Why is it that guy friendships seem to come so effortlessly and girl friendships seem to take a lot of work and effort? Why is it that guy friendships seem to be drama free, and girl friendships can often be drama filled? Is it really (like really really) important to invest into girl friendships, or can guy friendships do? If you’re anything like me (when I was single),Full Post

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February 15, 2019
Standing Firm When You Feel Unloved and Rejected

The waves of accusations crashing against my mind began something like this: No one loves you. You don’t have even one true friend who cares about you. You are unwanted; you always have been, and you always will be. The world would be better off if you were dead. The waves of this particular mental assault began about three weeks prior to a conference my ministry hosts for women. Every year we experience various attacks leading up to this event. I’m accustomed to the typical annoyances, such as cars breaking down, logistical setbacks, and random illnesses. But this summer, the battle was so sinister that I didn’t realize I was under attackFull Post

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February 13, 2019
Why Sexual Abuse is Never Okay

WATCH VIDEO  As we talk about sexual abuse, we want to first say that this issue is a huge and massive topic, therefore we cannot cover every important thing that needs to be said about this in one video. If you or someone you know has been a victim of sexual assault or abuse, we want to first say how deeply sorry we are. This is an awful and evil act that breaks our hearts and God’s heart. We are personally close to several people who have been victims of sexual abuse and it has been a long and challenging journey for each of these people. In this video,Full Post

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February 11, 2019
Let’s Start a Kindness Revolution

She barely looked up. I pulled my cart into the aisle, unloaded the groceries onto the conveyer belt, and watched as she began scanning them. She still didn’t look up—just kept her gaze down, as if afraid of making eye contact. I stood quietly for a moment as she worked. She looks sad, I thought. No—more than sad. Hurt. Hopeless. “How are you today?” I asked, breaking the silence. She jerked her head up, a startled look on her face. “Good. How are you?” A default reply. “I’m good, thank you.” Back to silence. A familiar nudge pricked my heart. I should say something. But what? My tongue seemedFull Post

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February 8, 2019
Why Premarital Sex isn’t an Expression of True Biblical Love

Love. Sex. These are major buzzwords right now. Although they’re wonderful and beautiful words, they don’t always mean the same thing to each person. In fact, each person seems to have their own version of what love actually means. When it comes to romantic relationships, this is especially true. As Christian women, our understanding of love and sexual intimacy will either push us towards Christ-centered holiness or toward self-centered gratification. It will make or break our relationships. It will either strengthen or destroy our future marriages. If we’re not intentional to define love and sex according to God’s Word, we will embrace whatever version fits the occasion.  In ourFull Post

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February 6, 2019
How to Rock Valentine’s Day as a Single Girl

WATCH VLOG Valentine’s Day can be one of the happiest days for some girls and one of the hardest days for other girls. If you’re a single gal yourself, you know exactly what we’re talking about. You can relate to the feelings of loneliness and the desire to have your own someone special on Valentine’s Day. Our younger sister, Ellissa, get’s exactly what you’re going through too. As a 26-year-old single gal herself, she can relate to the feelings of loneliness and longings. However, Ellissa isn’t here to talk about how miserable Valentine’s Day will be this year. She’s here to share with us how she is embracing her singleness and howFull Post

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February 4, 2019
Good Hospitality Doesn’t Require a Big Home 

After a breathtaking two weeks in the beautiful Rocky Mountains, my new husband and I were headed home.  Home no longer looked like it had for 30 years of my life. Home was now different. With someone different. Home was now a very small garage studio apartment across town from the rest of my family. I’ll never forget the moment Dav and I pulled into our new driveway. We walked up the stairs and unlocked the doors for the very first time as husband and wife. The place was small, but it was ours.  We were home. Living in a small space has been a fun and unique challengeFull Post

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February 1, 2019
Why Confessing Your Sin Leads to Freedom and Joy

Last weekend, Zack and I had the opportunity to teach at our church’s high school retreat which proved to be a fruitful and sanctifying experience. After weeks of preparation, praying, and pouring our hearts into the sessions, we were so excited to finally teach them together. The retreat weekend arrived and we found ourselves rushing to get out of the door. Feeling frazzled, frustrated, and slightly annoyed at each other, we headed on our way. ⁣ As the hour-long car ride stretched on, our disagreements and frustrations only worsened. And here’s the ironic part. We were scheduled to teach our first session THAT night and it was literally onFull Post

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January 28, 2019
Turning Overwhelmed into Peaceful

I ran into the woods knowing exactly where I was headed. My sisters and I have a huge tree fort with a swing and it made the perfect quiet spot. I had been trying to make things happen in my own power, forgetting to seek God. I needed to think. I needed to pray. The quietness of nature was the perfect place to do it! Are you overwhelmed? Have you ever gotten overwhelmed with life and tried to do things in your own power? Whenever I find myself doing this and I examine myself it always comes down to the same fact. I haven’t been seeking God as IFull Post

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January 25, 2019
How I Overcame Anxiety and Worry in My Life

When I was single, I spent a lot of time wondering if I would ever get married. I thought about the future a lot. Sometimes my thoughts were filled with anxiety and worry, and other times they were resting peacefully in God’s sovereignty. My questions about marriage were eventually answered in 2011 when I walked down the aisle and married Zack Clark. Now that I was married, I didn’t have to wonder about that anymore. I remember going on my honeymoon and feeling blissfully free of all worries about the future. Life was great. Life was simple. There was nothing to be anxious about. At least not yet.  Full Post

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January 21, 2019
A Peek Inside Dāv & Bethy’s Journals

Instead of just telling you about my love story with Dāv, I want to take you inside my journal and inside Dāv’s journal. Over the past few years, the two of us have been recording our thoughts, hopes, prayers, and desires for life. We’ve poured out our heart’s to God and surrendered our desires to Him. Little did either of us know that God was weaving our lives together. He was drawing our hearts towards one another in the most unexpected way. This blog post is filled with the journal entries that Dāv and I read to each other, and to our friends, on Oct. 14th, 2018 (our weddingFull Post

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January 18, 2019
4 Easy-to-Miss Signs that You Struggle with Gossip 

As soon as I saw her text message, I instantly felt the twinge of guilt. This friend was following up with me about a conversation the two of us had shared earlier that day. We had been innocently chatting about a recent challenge in her life regarding a certain relationship. Without even realizing it, our conversation headed south and begin to borderline on gossip. The details we hashed out about that particular person went too far and were not necessary. So in this text message, my friend asked me to forgive her for gossiping about that particular friend. I knew I was guilty as well, so I asked herFull Post

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January 16, 2019
3 Lies Single Women Believe

WATCH VIDEO  You want to get married, but there are no signs of matrimony anywhere on the horizon. You’re sad. You’re discouraged. You’re lonely. If you find yourself single and struggling, this video is for you. We unpack three lies that single women often believe and combat them with the truth to set you free. You don’t have to continue on in struggle and heartache. By God’s grace, you can learn to truly thrive as a single woman. WATCH VIDEO 

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How I Found a Modest Wedding Dress

WATCH VIDEO  I (Bethany) got married 3 months ago. Finding a fashionable and modest wedding dress was a high priority for me. However, glorifying God in every aspect of my wedding ceremony was also an important focus for Dave and me. I wanted to LOVE my dress, but I didn’t want to compromise my convictions in the process. After a quick trip to Houston, I ended up finding a dress that I LOVED in every way!! As you think about getting married someday, watch this video to gain a bigger picture for your wedding day…including everything down to the dress.   “What we are aiming for in the worship service of a weddingFull Post

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January 11, 2019
How to Pray Every Single Day

I’ve only met a handful of Christians in my entire life who’ve said that their prayer life is a daily, consistent, ongoing, and passionate habit in their life. Most Christians I talk to seem to fall more in line with my struggle of desiring to pray more faithfully but finding it hard to stay consistent. Prayer seems to be a big challenge for most of us. So, as I write this post, I am not coming to you like the prayer warrior that I long to be. I am not her. At least not yet. But I want to be. I desire more. And I know God wants forFull Post

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January 9, 2019
What We Do for Our Morning Quiet Time

WATCH VIDEO  Having a daily quiet time with the Lord is something each and every one of us should strive to do. Although it’s something we should all be doing, it can often be confusing to know what to do and how to do it. We often have questions like… What does “quiet time” even mean? How do I study the Bible? Should I read a book of the Bible? Should I work through the entire Bible each year? In today’s vlog, the two of us answer these questions and share with you what we are doing this year. WATCH VIDEO 

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January 7, 2019
4 Strategies for Living at Home as an Adult Daughter

My younger sisters (Ellissa, Rebekah, and Suzanna) and I sat in our kitchen nook late into the night. We chatted about our weeks and then landed on this topic: How to be an adult daughter who chooses to live at home. Rebekah is nineteen, Ellissa is twenty-six, and I am thirty (I lived at home until I got married at 30 years old). All three of us willingly/joyfully chose to live at home (the other girls still live at home). None of us are/were perfect at handling these dynamics. We each had our bad days, selfish moments, and unkind words (given and received). Communication between adult daughters and parentsFull Post

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January 4, 2019
How God Changed My Relationship with Makeup

I abruptly opened my eyes to the blaring sound of my alarm. As the blurriness began to subside, I slowly sat up and peered toward the window directly in front of me. It was a grey and overcast day in Chicago, but it was an exciting day nonetheless. My mom was asked to be a part of a show that highlights the benefits of incorporating raw fruits and vegetable into your diet. She was going as a testament to how raw foods have greatly improved her type 2 diabetes. My two sisters and I were also invited to come to the shoot to get some footage with our mom.Full Post

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January 2, 2019
6 Books to Read in 2019

WATCH VIDEO  Books have played a huge role in each of our lives. The two of us would not be the women we are today without the practical wisdom we received through reading sound Christian books. That is why we are so passionate about reading and challenging others to read as well. Here are 6 books that the two of us are planning to read in 2019 and encourage you to read too. 1. Lies Women Believe  2. In His Image 3. Gay Girl Good God  4. Rethinking Sexuality  5. Visual Theology 6. Scripture Journal  We can’t recommend books without mentioning our two all-time favorites! Girl Defined: God’s RadicalFull Post

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December 31, 2018
Top 5 Most Popular Posts from 2018

This past year has been one of the most exciting years the two of us have ever experienced at Girl Defined. The testimonies that we heard in person, online, and through email were absolutely incredible. Some of you grew in your relationship with Christ. Some of you accepted Christ as your personal Savior for the very first time. Some of you found freedom from habitual sin. Some of you found the courage to pour into other young women. The list could go on. God is working mightily amongst the Girl Defined Sisterhood and we are thrilled to be a part of that work. This past year we launched ourFull Post

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December 28, 2018
2 Free Video Studies from GirlDefined

A new year means a new start! This is a great time to write down goals, create a new reading list, and just get a little more intentional about life. To help you do that, we want to introduce you to our free video studies. These free videos were created to go along with each of our books, Girl Defined and Love Defined, and provide structure and teaching for each book. The Girl Defined book video study is 8 weeks long and helps to break down the book into easy, bite-size reading portions. The Love Defined book study is 6 weeks long and will walk you through the entireFull Post

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December 26, 2018
Talking Singleness and Missions with Ellissa

WATCH VIDEO  Ever since Bethany got married, many of you have been asking how Ellissa is doing with the transition. In a nutshell, she’s doing great! As a 26-year-old single woman, she’s seeking to trust God and serve Him faithfully during this season of her life. However, we thought you’d rather hear it from her! So…for today’s video, we brought Ellissa onto the set and asked her some questions about singleness, contentment, purpose, as well as her passion for orphans and missions. Click the link below to be encouraged and inspired by her honest answers and wise insights. WATCH VIDEO 

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December 21, 2018
Christmas Countdown Bible Reading Plan

Christmas day is almost here which means many of us are scrambling to purchase last minute gift, wrap that final present, and run into that one other store. In the midst of the Christmas craziness and frenzied finale, I have an idea for you. An idea to calm your heart and bring true peace back into your busy life. Slow down and take some time — starting this weekend — to read the incredible story of our Savior’s birth.  Don’t get so caught up in the last minute rush that you forget to sit down, be still, and fill your heart with the true treasure of Christmas. And since we all needFull Post

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December 19, 2018
Trusting God When Life Takes an Unexpected Turn

WATCH VIDEO It’s easy to trust God when life is going our way. But what happens when life takes an unexpected turn? What happens when our circumstances and seasons of life take us down a road that is filled with questions and uncertainty? It’s during these times that trusting God wholeheartedly can be challenging. This is exactly where a young woman named Mary found herself. She was engaged to her soon-to-be husband, Joseph, and found her life taking an extremely unexpected turn. She was a woman just like you and me who had to choose to trust God in the midst of great uncertainty. If your life is taking some unexpected turns right now,Full Post

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December 17, 2018
2 Truths to Replace Self-Pity with Joy

Jennifer’s tears rolled down her cheeks as she struggled to express her thoughts. “I just don’t feel like God sees me or cares about me. He’s never answered a single one of my prayers and I never see Him working in my life. I don’t have many friends, my parents don’t give me the time of day, and my health is awful. I just can’t see any reason to live for God or praise Him. I honestly think He has forgotten about me.” The tears continued to fall and Jennifer seemed to be growing more depressed and discouraged as she thought about her life. From her perspective, life wasFull Post

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December 14, 2018
When Singleness and Christmastime Don’t Seem to Mingle

Tis the season to be jolly, right? But how does that work when all I want for Christmas is you, baby? Christmastime is supposed to be a time of wonder, excitement, love, and joy — but sometimes this holiday season can feel at odds with the season of singleness. I remember this all too well. Although I’m married now, I was unmarried for 24 years and I can clearly remember being single and hearing those sappy, romantic Christmas songs play on the radio. A twinge of loneliness and desire would fill my heart. As hard as it was for me at times, I wouldn’t stay in that place ofFull Post

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December 12, 2018
A Challenge: Make Someone’s Day this December!

WATCH VIDEO  It doesn’t take much to make someone’s day. Since the Christmas season is all about giving and blessing others, make it your goal to intentionally bless someone this month. To help you do that, we have a fun December challenge for you! Over the next few weeks, go out of your way to make someone else’s day by doing one of the following actions:  Give them a surprise Christmas Angel gift. 2. Pay for someone’s food/coffee order in a drive-thru. 3. Pray for someone and text them your prayer. 4. Do a random task or project for a family member or friend. 5. Write an encouraging noteFull Post

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December 10, 2018
The Tradition of the Christmas Angel

My family adores Christmas traditions; we look forward to them every year. Christmas breakfast always looks the same. Christmas dinner always looks the same. The stockings hanging on the fireplace always look the same. We love doing the same things year after year after year! One of my family’s most special Christmas traditions started when I was little. My parents called this tradition “The Christmas Angel,” and it begins on December first and lasts until Christmas day. The goal of this tradition is to secretly leave a little “Christmas Angel” gift for someone in a place where they’ll simply stumble across it. These gifts can be anything—they don’t haveFull Post

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December 7, 2018
This Engaged Guy’s Decision Changed History Forever

He was engaged to an amazing woman. Like most engaged guys, he was probably counting down the days until his wedding. I don’t know this couple personally, but from what I hear, they’re pretty amazing. Their engagement was going great until something completely unexpected happened. Something that rocked his world. This unexpected turn of events surprised everyone they knew. It was his fiancée. She had been with another man. He thought his bride-to-be was pure and faithful…but apparently, this wasn’t the case.  She was pregnant. The distraught groom wrestled with his thoughts and emotions trying to figure out what to do. With the wedding drawing closer every day, heFull Post

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December 5, 2018
How to Overcome Envy, Jealousy, & Selfishness

WATCH VIDEO A lot of you have been asking how to make Christmas more meaningful this year. Last week we talked about Advent and unpacked exactly what it is and how you can do an advent study this year.  How to do an Advent Study this Christmas In my (Bethany’s) Advent study, I was reading about a woman, in Luke 1, named Elizabeth. She is an incredible example of a woman who had every opportunity to display envy, jealousy, and selfishness in her life but didn’t. Instead, she chose the opposite. She responded selflessly.  Elizabeth’s godly character didn’t happen in an instant though. It was a life of walking humblyFull Post

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December 3, 2018
Stop Worrying About the Future

I am in my junior year of high school, which means college and a bucket load of decisions are on there way. It is too easy to start worrying about where I’m going to attend college, what I’m going to study, who I’m going to marry, and what in the world I’m going to do with my life. And to top it all off, I don’t want to mess it up and go against what the Lord wants for my life. I know there are a ton of other girls out there who feel the same way about this tremendous burden. Maybe you aren’t worried about something I justFull Post

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November 30, 2018
Before You Post that Sexy Workout Selfie

I’m guilty. I have totally done it. After a long hard workout, I remember snapping a “sexy” picture of myself in front of my bedroom mirror. You know. The kind where you angle your body just right to make your fat disappear and your muscles look huge. Yep. That was me. I wanted to see how hot I looked. I wanted to admire my body. Deep down, I was self-obsessed and I didn’t care. I was working out because I wanted to look good. I wanted people to admire my fit body. I wanted other girls to be secretly jealous of me. The trend of the sexy workout selfie. OnceFull Post

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November 28, 2018
How to Do an Advent Study this Christmas

WATCH VIDEO  The two of us grew up in a home that celebrated Advent every single Christmas season. Our parents would put a big wreath on the dinner table. The wreath held four smaller candles on the outer edge and one big candle in the middle. Celebrating Advent was a big deal for us as little girls and continues to be a big deal for us as grown women. What is Advent? The word advent literally means “arrival” or “an appearing or coming into place.” The First Advent (meaning first appearing of Christ) happened at Christmas over 2,000 years ago. The Christmas Advent celebration is both a commemoration of Christ’sFull Post

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November 26, 2018
How to Become a Woman Who Thrives

With my calves on fire and my body soaking wet from the hours of running in the rain, I finally crossed the finish line. The months of training that I’d spent leading up until this point paid off. I had officially run my first (and probably only) marathon. You better believe I put that 26.2 sticker proudly on the back of my car. This was an incredible and unimaginable achievement for me. I had no idea I was capable of running that far. To be honest, I’m still not sure how I did it. During the race pretty much everything that could have gone wrong went wrong. It wasFull Post

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November 23, 2018
Why I’m Glad I’m Not Cinderella

The string lights in the trees shone brightly on that warm October evening as I eyed the young couples, twirling around and swaying elegantly on the grass. I felt like a character in a romance novel as I listened to the live band play and observed the guys and girls talking and dancing. Meanwhile, I stood on the sidewalk beside my sister and a friend. I watched intently. I couldn’t help but ask myself when it would be my turn to dance. When will someone ask me? Will a guy ever be brave enough? I couldn’t help but wonder when a guy would even bother to notice me. WouldFull Post

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November 21, 2018
The Hardest Things to Be Thankful For

WATCH VIDEO  The Holiday Season can be one of the happiest seasons for some of us and the most difficult seasons for others of us. Instead of allowing your circumstances to dictate your holidays, be intentional to cultivate gratitude. Be intentional to choose joy even in the midst of hardship. Be intentional to think of others even when you don’t feel like it. Here are three ways that you can begin to cultivate thankfulness during the holiday season.  1. Dwell in the Presence of the Lord 2. Give to Someone Else Who’s Hurting 3. Choose to Proactively love difficult people. WATCH VIDEO 

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November 19, 2018
10 Things Purity Was Never Meant To Be

I was her. I was the teen girl reading Christian books on modesty, purity, and relationships. I often read my favorite books over and over again. I loved learning and I loved striving to understand God’s design for my life as a Christian girl. I wore the purity ring. I read I Kissed Dating Goodbye. I saved sex for marriage. Etc. etc. etc. I was that girl. Fast forward to our modern day and I guess some would consider me a direct product of the “purity movement.” As a product of that generation, many often wonder how it’s impacted me and how it’s impacted my brand new marriage. ToFull Post

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November 14, 2018
Q & A: Birth Control, Relationships and Singleness

WATCH VIDEO  We asked and you answered. You submitted your most pressing questions through the Girl Defined Instagram page. We took the top six questions asked and turned them into a  Q & A video. We answer questions like…  Thoughts on the use of birth control and contraception in marriage? Can you actively “look” for a boyfriend while waiting/trusting that God has it? What’s the balance? Long distance relationship-sticking to boundaries when you are together? What to do when I get a comment from someone like, “you’re still single?” How do I respond and deal with that? How do you navigate being just friends with a guy when heFull Post

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November 12, 2018
5 Ways to Practice Hospitality as a Single Woman

As a newly married woman with my own space now, one of the things I can’t wait to do is show hospitality to others. As I unpack my many boxes, I’m imaging how fun it’s going to be to invite people into my new little apartment and serve them a good meal. I can’t wait to have my family, friends, and neighbors over for some southern sweet tea and good conversations. Here’s the thing though…as excited as I am about pursuing hospitality now, this isn’t a new practice for me. Pursuing hospitality is something I have enjoyed doing for many, many years, long before I ever got married. As aFull Post

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November 9, 2018
3 Truths for the Single Woman Longing for Marriage

I was talking to a friend recently who is single, in her mid-twenties, and regularly wondering if God has marriage in store for her future. As we chatted, she shared her struggles honestly from her heart. “It’s just so hard to keep my hope set on the Lord when I desire marriage so much. I just wish God would tell me if I’m ever going to get married or not. The unknown is so hard to endure!” As we talked, her honesty and openness reminded me of how I often felt during my single years as well. I desperately desired marriage. I wondered if my longings would ever beFull Post

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November 7, 2018
Bethany Talks Wedding, Honeymoon and Marriage

WATCH VIDEO  I (Bethany) recently got married. This is my first vlog recording since becoming Mrs. Beal. My life has changed a lot over the past year, but it changed the MOST on Oct. 14th around 4:30pm in the afternoon. You can actually watch the wedding ceremony here.  During this video, Kristen asks me questions about my wedding, honeymoon, and marriage. WATCH VIDEO 

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November 5, 2018
Girl, You Can Maintain a Strong Spiritual Life

My dad is a carpet cleaner—and a very fine one, at that. It’s a lovely luxury to enjoy the feeling of fluffy, soft, newly-cleaned fibers under your feet. But, just like everything else in life, carpet requires maintenance. Most people clean their carpets about once every five years. However, if carpet receives a regular maintenance cleaning (like once every five months), it stays fresh and relatively unsoiled. The same is true about spiritual maintenance. There’s nothing like the feeling of a spiritual high. Like sensing a close fellowship with our heavenly Father, the Spirit within delighting in the things of God. However, those mountaintop seasons usually don’t happen veryFull Post

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November 2, 2018
To the Girl Who Feels Hopeless

Feelings of hopelessness have been on the fringe of my life these past few years. As Zack and I have traveled down an unexpected road of recurrent miscarriage and infertility, I have felt the waves of hopelessness knock at the door of my heart many times (watch our story here). For many of us, unfulfilled longings can often be the biggest funnel toward hopelessness. As I’ve wrestled with my own unfulfilled longings, I’ve come to the realization that the way I choose to respond to my disappointments will take me down one of two paths: Either I will go down a path toward hopelessness, or I will choose toFull Post

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October 31, 2018
How We Found “The One”

WATCH VIDEO You like him and he likes you…but how do you know if he’s the “the one?” Instead of relying solely on emotions and feelings to figure out the answer to this important question, Zack and Kristen share with you a simple, yet wisdom-based approach for navigating this question. Using their own love story as the backdrop, they’ll show you how “discerning the one” isn’t as mysterious and confusing as we often make it out to be. “Finding the one isn’t a mysterious search; it’s a practical and exciting adventure built on wisdom, prayer, counsel, commitment, and sacrificial love.” #LoveDefinedBook WATCH VIDEO

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October 29, 2018
Bethany’s Tips for Planning, Hosting, and Throwing a Fabulous Party

I love hosting parties. Having people in my home is one of my favorite things to do. I love hosting, planning, organizing and watching my friends enjoy a super fun time together. The work that goes into planning and hosting a fabulous dinner, game night, or party, is totally worth it to me. I find so much joy in creating a time and space for people to have community, fellowship, and a good clean time. Sadly, hospitality has become such a lost art in our generation. People just don’t invite people into their homes anymore. Our homes are more like quick rest stops instead of places we welcome peopleFull Post

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October 26, 2018
Our Story of Infertility and Where We Are Today

WATCH VIDEO Zack and Kristen open up about their 7-year journey of infertility and recurrent miscarriages. Despite their unfulfilled longings, they’re trusting that God is good and still has a plan in the midst of loss. WATCH VIDEO

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October 24, 2018
Why Marriage Won’t Ultimately Satisfy

WATCH VLOG Although marriage is wonderful and exciting, it can’t ultimately satisfy us. God never intended marriage (or any human being) to satisfy another. True satisfaction can only be found in Christ. “We were designed for more than the trivial pursuit of pleasure. The hard truth is that we will never find relief if we continue to seek it through possessions or through people. Seeking satisfaction in the things of this world is like chasing the wind. Once you’re finally exhausted and weary from your pursuit, you’re left empty-handed and disappointed. You’ve wasted valuable time chasing nothing when you could have been pursuing true joy and peace.” -Desiring GodFull Post

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October 22, 2018
How to Prepare for Marriage and Motherhood

Scene 1: You dreamed about this day your whole life. You are about to say “I do” to the man of your dreams and start your new life as a married woman. After years of prayer, you have met “the One” and he’s better than you expected. His Christ-like character, fun personality, and dreamy looks are just what any girl wants in a husband. And now, you’re getting married to him! You’re so excited, you could hardly breathe. Before you know it, you’re standing at the altar next to him and uttering those words. Then the next thing you know, you’re now his wife. You think, Now what? SceneFull Post

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October 19, 2018
Are You Playing Footsie with Sexual Temptation?

His heart beat faster as he purposely walked down the dark street. It was nighttime, and nobody else was out. He knew she lived in this area. He was hoping she would come out to meet him. He glanced around to make sure no one saw him. He continued walking when she suddenly appeared in front of him. Without saying a word, she wrapped her arms around his neck and brazenly kissed him. “My husband is gone,” she said in a seductive whisper. “Come with me and let’s have our fill of love until the morning!” Like an ox being led to the slaughter, he immediately followed the seductressFull Post

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October 17, 2018
Why I Waited Until Marriage to Kiss

WATCH VIDEO Waiting until marriage to kiss isn’t something you’ll hear much about from pop culture. Although saving sex, kissing, or any other intimate act for marriage is a rarity, it can be done!  In this video, both of us (Kristen and Bethany) share our personal journies of when and where the idea of waiting to kiss until marriage came into existence. We also answer candid questions like… “Was it worth it?” “Would you do the same thing over again?” “Will I ever find a guy if I have such high standards?” WATCH VIDEO

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October 12, 2018
Why did God Create Marriage Anyways?

I have a beautiful hand-painted picture of a mountainous scene hanging in my house. Every time I look at this picture, I long for the fresh mountain air of Colorado (my second favorite state after Texas). This beautiful picture is a magnificent representation of the mountains I love. It reflects a beautiful scene. However, as much as I love this picture, it’s only a representation of the real thing. God created marriage to work exactly the same way. Marriage, as lovely as it is, is only a picture of something greater. It’s an earthly representation of something much grander. God placed the institution of marriage on the wall ofFull Post

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October 10, 2018
Marriage, Sex, and My New Life as a Wife

WATCH VIDEO Life is about to change in a huge way for me (Bethany). With marriage literally days away, I want to share my thoughts on what I’m thinking and how I’m feeling about marriage, sex, and my new life as a wife. I’ll be answering questions like… Why are you and Dāv saving sex for marriage? Are you nervous about the wedding night? How important is your new role as a wife? How have you practically been preparing for marriage? Do you have any favorite books or resources that have helped you prepare for this time? And so much more… WATCH VIDEO

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October 8, 2018
Writing Letters to Your Future Husband

I’m getting married in less than one week. For years, I wondered if this day would actually come. Marriage has always been something I strongly desired…but I also knew it wasn’t something God owed me or something He promised to me. So, for the past 30 years, I have been holding my dreams, desires, and longings for marriage in one hand, and my trust, hope, and contentment in God in the other hand. Little did I know what God had brewing all along. In less than 7 days, I’ll walk down the aisle to a godly and faithful man named David Beal. Without even knowing it, this is the manFull Post

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October 5, 2018
Becoming the Right Kind of Leader and Influencer

We’ve all experienced different kinds of leaders: some domineering, some soft-spoken, some daring, some methodical. So what do all leaders have in common? Influence. Whatever the personality or gifting, we are leaders if we are impacting others. But what about us as Christian women? How does leadership apply to us? Well, the Bible teaches that we are all commanded to lead as ambassadors of Christ. We are His representatives. Man or woman, we are to have an impact on others for the sake of the gospel. Now, some of us have had a horrible experience under sinful leadership. Satan has done his best to twist the truth about theFull Post

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October 3, 2018
Being Intentional in a Romantic Relationship

WATCH VIDEO Being intentional during a romantic relationship is important. Out of a desire to honor God and the other person, the relationship should be pursued in a purposeful way. In this video, we share 4 specific ways to pursue intentionality in romance. WATCH VIDEO

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October 1, 2018
Are You Seeking God’s Word for Guidance?

Being a military wife has its perks. My husband and I were stationed in Ketchikan, Alaska, on one of our tours a few years back.  Not only is it beautiful, but it’s also known for being the salmon fishing capital of the world, at least that is what the sign says at the town entrance. I believe it too, because you could smell the salmon during their spawning season in all the creeks downtown. Alaska also has wonderful hunting areas. This is my husband’s dream.  He has always wanted to hunt, and this was his chance to do that, at the best place possible. One weekend my husband, Jared,Full Post

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September 29, 2018
Modest Fall Outfit Ideas

WATCH VIDEO Combining fashion and modesty during the fall can be really fun. With the weather cooling down, it’s easier to layer-up and wear styles that offer a little more coverage. After creating our previous video called, Modest Summer Outfit Ideas, many of you asked us to create another video for the fall. So here it is! We decided to partner with Thred Up again, online store, to bring you affordable, modest, and fashionable fall outfit ideas. In today’s video, we’re going to show you some of our favorite finds for our fall wardrobe. WATCH VIDEO  

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September 28, 2018
3 Signs You’re Looking to Guys for Satisfaction Instead of God

I knew exactly where he was in the room at every moment. I was desperate to know more about this tall good looking guy. As a single girl in high school at the time, I was highly intrigued by this handsome face. As my head hit my pillow that night, my thoughts were flooded with dreams of “this guy.” I woke up the next morning anxious to see him again. Even though I barely knew his name, I did whatever I could to be near him. Whether purposely walking past him, staring at him from across the room, or simply making myself available, I was consumed with this guy.Full Post

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September 26, 2018
Using Social Media in a God Honoring Way

WATCH VLOG Most of us have social media out of default because it’s the normal thing to do. FIRST ASK: What is my purpose or goal for having social media? 4 Heart-Check Questions to Ask Before Posting: 1. Will this post be honoring to God? “So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all to the glory of God.” 1 Cor. 10:31 2. Will this post Build Up those who see it? “Let no unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building up the one in need and bringing grace to those who listen.” Ephesians 4:29 Check out theFull Post

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September 24, 2018
Am I Nervous About the Wedding Night?

I’m a 30-year-old virgin who’s getting married in less than a month. It makes sense why so many of you keep asking me if I’m nervous about the wedding night. Honestly, this is a pretty personal question. You are asking me if I’m nervous about having sex with my brand new husband for the very first time. Although it’s personal, I want to answer it. I want you to know what I’m thinking and how I’m feeling. Here goes. I’m freaking out and totally excited!!! I am about to enter into a covenant and commit to be the wife of my lover and bestest friend in the world. IFull Post

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September 21, 2018
God Made You Beautiful, Despite How Ugly You Feel

Her hair was long and beautiful. It was thick and luscious. As she highlighted my hair in the salon, I couldn’t help but compliment her hair. “I just love your hair!” I said enthusiastically. I expected her to accept my compliment with satisfaction, but she didn’t. “Oh…thanks!” she said laughing out loud. “It’s actually not my hair…well, at least not most of it.” I raised my eyebrows in surprise. “Yeah, it’s actually mostly hair extensions. My real hair is short and thin.” She said with a wink. She went on to explain how her salon offered high-quality fusion hair extension service. They would fuse real pieces of hair onto theFull Post

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September 19, 2018
Overcoming the Comparison Trap

WATCH VIDEO  When I, Bethany, was 19 years old, I was given a reliable old car to drive. Immediately I started comparing myself and my car to other girls with newer cars. Comparison left me feeling ungrateful and discontent.  Once I surrendered my need to measure up to others, I was able to enjoy the car that God had given to me.  In our modern day and age of technology, comparison is probably one of the biggest traps many of us find ourselves in. We compare our clothes, cars, wealth, grades, family, friends, makeup, hair, skin, features, height, weight and on and on. If we give into comparison, it willFull Post

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September 17, 2018
Hope for the Girl Who’s Miserable and Lonely

I can remember a time when, as a teenager and young adult, I was lonely. Really lonely. It was a constant struggle and I always felt like I was on the outside looking in as I watched my friends and peers in their budding relationships. I have vivid memories of crying and praying that I would somehow find the person God had for me. My study bible had tears on the pages as I searched for scripture that would be encouraging in my moments of intense loneliness. There were times I felt miserable.  Since that time, I have learned so much about where some of those thoughts and feelings originate.Full Post

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September 14, 2018
Christian Girl’s Guide for Managing Her Time Wisely

It’s constantly moving, always slipping away. There’s never enough of it, though sometimes there seems to be entirely too much of it. What is it? Time. Our Creator gifted us with this precious, temporary commodity. And He cares deeply about how we use it. “Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil.” Ephesians 5:15-16 “So teach us to number our days that we may get a heart of wisdom.” Psalm 90:12 When considering how to fill our calendars, remember that life is “a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes” (JamesFull Post

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September 12, 2018
Just Because it’s Popular Doesn’t Make it Right

WATCH VLOG The two of us were recently talking to our younger sister, Rebekah, about being a Christin teen girl. She was telling us how hard it is to stand strong when it feels like everyone is into something that you know isn’t honoring to God or helpful in your Christian walk. As Christian girls, we have to be committed to God’s Truth and embrace His good plan for our lives. No matter how countercultural it is. In today’s vlog we discuss, “4 Popular ideas that Clash with God’s Truth.” Let’s choose to be women who honor God and obey him rather than following what’s popular amongst our peers. WATCHFull Post

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September 10, 2018
Marriage Advice That You Don’t Want to Miss

Today I get to introduce to you a 35-year-old love story. This couple is very special to me because they happen to be my parents. I am so excited to introduce to you to Mike (my dad) and Heidi (my mom). With over 35 years of marriage experience, this amazing couple has been an example of love, faithfulness, and commitment. In a generation that is clueless on how to attain lasting relationships, I can’t wait for you to hear from a couple with a proven resume. Instead of listening to Hollywoods cheap advice, I’m offering you a front-row seat into a couple who’s stood the test of time. GiveFull Post

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September 7, 2018
Be a Woman Whose Purpose Fuels Your Passion

She went from a nobody to a world changer within a matter of months. This young woman was nothing more than a peasant girl when her life took a drastic, unexpected turn. Nobody knew her name. But now, everybody in the kingdom knew exactly who she was. They knew…because she was their new queen. She was Esther. The true story of Esther is like the biblical version of a “Cinderella” story. However, Esther’s life was anything but glamorous. Ripped from her home and family, forced to live in the king’s harem, and then ultimately forced to marry a man she didn’t even know…Esther’s life was not perfectly romantic. And toFull Post

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September 5, 2018
Never Been Asked Out on a Date

WATCH VLOG  Year after year goes by and you wonder if anyone will ever ask you out on a date. Whether you’re in your teens, twenties, thirties, or even forties, it can be really hard if you’ve never been asked out or even pursued by a guy. What not to do? Don’t believe the lie that you are less than. Don’t find your identity in having a guy or not having a guy. Don’t chase down guys out of desperation Don’t settle because you just want a guy. What to do? Trust that God is good and sovereign (Prov 3:5-6). Thrive in your singleness by living for God GetFull Post

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September 3, 2018
I Want Your Heart (and Eight Other Things I Want to Tell My Future Husband)

I stared at his tanned arms, his charming smile, and his slicked-back hair as he stood in the college cafeteria line. The moment I heard his contagious laugh, I got goosebumps. I couldn’t help but sigh as he walked past me. “There he goes,” I thought dejectedly. “He’s probably never going to notice me.” Though it hurt to be neglected by the young man, I honestly wouldn’t consider entering a relationship with him, even if he was interested in me. Though he was very handsome, smart, and popular (for good reason), he didn’t have the qualities I was looking for in a future spouse. Sure, he was kind and courteous;Full Post

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August 31, 2018
3 Lies Porn Teaches Women About Their Sexuality

We live in a day and age when pornographic content is readily available with the click of a button. What used to be a hush-hush industry is turning into a booming mainstream business. Porn is no longer primarily targeted toward men either but is targeted at women, teens, and even children. The sad reality is, if you have any of the following devices, you’ve probably been (or will be) exposed to some form of porn: Social media accounts A phone with internet A TV in your room A laptop with internet access OR – you hang out with friends who have any of the above. As tantalizing as pornographyFull Post

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August 29, 2018
Standing Strong in the Face of Peer Pressure

WATCH VIDEO  Negative peer pressure…we’ve all been there. That moment when we feel like we MUST conform because we don’t want to stand out. We don’t want to be weird. We don’t want to look lame. The two of us have totally been there and we’re guessing you have too. So what does peer pressure look like? “Come on…just try a little beer, it’s not gonna kill you.” “Everyone is going to the party, don’t be a sissy.” “It’s okay to tell a white lie every now and then.” “Look, if you love your boyfriend, it’s okay to sleep with them.” The bottom line is this: We all giveFull Post

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August 27, 2018
10 Misconceptions about Biblical Womanhood

I was twenty-two years old and totally taken off guard by Lacy’s blatant attacks on my beliefs. Apparently, she had heard about my perspectives and beliefs on biblical womanhood and was not impressed. In fact, offended/annoyed would be the right way to describe her feelings towards me at that time. During this back and forth “debate” of sorts, I was extremely uncomfortable. I wasn’t exactly sure how to counter Lacy’s arguments and I was a little insecure about my stance on Scripture and biblical womanhood. I felt like Lacy was completely demeaning and attacking biblical womanhood and I felt at a loss for words to defend what I believed.Full Post

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August 24, 2018
When Guy-Talk Becomes a Regular Obsession

I sat on the sand in a knee-to-knee circle with my three closest girlfriends. As southern California locals, every summer Friday found us at the beach with a group of families.  Beach days were the best…cool ocean, sizzling sun, sand talks, and snacks in abundance.  “We need to talk about something. I think we chat about guys too much.” My friend Grace was the quieter one in our circle, so she caught our immediate attention with her blunt statement. Like typical teenage girls, we loved to chat about our friends.  Especially our guy friends.  Even though we were Christian girls who had chosen to intentionally not date in highFull Post

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August 22, 2018
Your Relationship Status Does Not Define You

WATCH VIDEO Wedding season is officially upon us! It seems like everyone is falling in love and getting married. You may feel like, “I’m the only one not getting married right now.” With the abundance of romance buzzing around, you may be tempted to question your worth and identity as a woman. You may even begin to feel “less than” because you don’t have a boyfriend.  This is a reality for SO many young women. According to a recent survey, “70 percent of the girls said they would feel better about themselves if they had a boyfriend/attention from a boy.” We often feel like having a boyfriend is a MUST. But that isFull Post

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August 20, 2018
How My Feminist Thinking Almost Destroyed My Marriage

I grew up without my mother. She passed away when I was four years old. I remember women saying (in person or in movies) that they’ve dreamt of marriage all their lives and have planned for their wedding since they were five years old. I’d scrunch my nose and think “Why on earth would you do that?!” and laugh it away. I didn’t plan for my wedding until I was engaged. My husband grew up without his father. Not due to death, but to divorce. We met at a Bible study at seventeen. He was my friend first: someone who inspired me to grow closer to Jesus and deeperFull Post

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August 17, 2018
Same-Sex Attraction and the Christian Girl

She experienced same-sex attraction for the first time when she was five years old. These feelings were a part of her life as long as she could remember. As she grew into a teenager the feelings only intensified. By age seventeen, she pursued her first female relationship and openly embraced her life as a lesbian. Then, at age nineteen something radical happened in her life. She was introduced to a man named Jesus. She had never known a love so powerful before. She had never experienced a love so intimate and satisfying. Over the next few years, Jesus transformed her life from the inside out. This is the trueFull Post

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August 15, 2018
The Power of a Strong Sisterhood

WATCH VIDEO  The power of a strong sisterhood is life changing. It helps you to stand strong through the hard times and helps you to keep going even when you don’t feel like it.   The Bible says, “A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”  Don’t live this life alone. God designed you to live in the context of a strong community. Find a sisterhood and lean on them for strength. WATCH VIDEO 

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August 13, 2018
The Future is so Much More than Female

I’m a woman. I love being a woman. I love everything about it. I’m all for women championing and encouraging other women. I think it’s amazing that so many women can work hard, dream big, and live hugely awesome lives. Ambition is amazing. Hard work is amazing. Dreaming big is amazing. I personally thrive on living life to the fullest. I love pouring my heart out for the jobs and tasks God has called me to. I feel so alive when I work hard and accomplish big things for His glory. Even if they aren’t glamorous jobs, I love working hard and giving my all. God has so uniquelyFull Post

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August 10, 2018
Modesty Hacks and Fashion Tips with Hello Modesty

Big tears streamed down my face. I just knew I was destined to a life of drabby, old-fashioned clothing. I was sixteen, and my parents and I were having another modesty conversation. I wanted to be fashionable, but I felt like my parents were dooming me to a life of turtlenecks and bonnets. They did their best to explain that modesty didn’t have to look old-fashioned. They encouraged me to have fun and explore styles but not to compromise on my modesty standards. After years of trial, error, tears, and lots of creative thinking, I’ve finally come to understand the balance of fashion and modesty my parents were pushingFull Post

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August 8, 2018
Hollywood’s Method for Relationships vs. God’s Method

WATCH VIDEO  Most of us want vibrant marriages that last. We want faithful spouses and committed marriages, but something isn’t working. Relationships aren’t lasting. Many marriages aren’t thriving. When it comes to our love lives, many of us are taking our cues from Hollywood. We are building our relationships upon a foundation that is destined to crumble. If you want something more Christ-centered, check out today’s video. WATCH VIDEO 

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August 6, 2018
Pretty Little Sins

After a long day at school, I was ready to get home, throw on some old sweatpants, and relax. When I opened my bedroom door, however, I was greeted with a nasty surprise: I had left my window open and my room was now infested with insects all trying to escape the Georgia summer heat. Flying roaches, angry wasps, even a big, fuzzy spider—every creepy crawler you can imagine, swarming all over my stuff. Totally grossed out, I was running around the room with a fly swatter and an extra-large can of Raid, trying to exterminate all the bugs, when I spotted one out of the corner of myFull Post

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August 3, 2018
Girl, What Does Your Heart Desire?

Like many of you, I am constantly thinking of my future, constantly thinking how will I know if I’m doing God’s will in my life? How do I know if I have God-honouring desires? That’s when I turn to Psalm 37… verse 4 especially… “Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.” Well when I was younger, I always assumed that verse meant, that if I delight and draw near to God, He will give me whatever my heart desires… GREAT I thought! All I have to do is get close to God and bam, He’s going to give me all that my heartFull Post

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July 31, 2018
God and the School Year

WATCH VIDEO  When the busyness of the school year hits, it can be easy to push God to the back burner. The two of us have been there and we totally get how that goes.  Unless we, as modern women, are intentional to get into God’s Word, it won’t happen. The two of us are challenging you to bring God into your school year. Whether it’s middle school, high school, or college, make your relationship with God a top priority. “Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the wicked, nor stands in the way of sinners, nor sits in the seat of scoffers; but his delightFull Post

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July 30, 2018
How Important is Attraction in a Romantic Relationship?

His blue eyes and curly brown hair were enough to make me swoon. I loved hanging out at the basketball gym. I loved watching my crush play. In my eyes, this guy was drop dead hotness. I loved everything about him. His hair, his snapback, his eyes, his skills, and the way he wore baggy athletic shorts and a sweaty t-shirt. He was perfect in my eyes. Oh, and did I mention that the two of us had never actually spoken? Yep! That’s right. I was in love (or in like and totally infatuated) with a guy I had never even spoken to. I didn’t know the first thingFull Post

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July 27, 2018
Enjoying Romance In A Godly Relationship

“Hey babe, remember that one time…?” Conversations often start like this in our home.  Richard and I frequently reminisce, swapping specific moments of our romance with full hearts.   Who doesn’t love romance?!  When romantic moments are based on God’s design for love and marriage, few things are as exciting or precious to experience. After all, God created the whole concept of boy meets girl! I’m sure He sat back smiling with delight as Adam and Eve grew to know and cherish one another (Genesis 2:20-25). So how can we, as modern women, enjoy romance in a God-honoring way? Here are a few things that Richard and I incorporatedFull Post

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July 25, 2018
6 Truths for Overcoming Worry and Anxiety

WATCH VIDEO If you’re struggling with worry right now, we encourage you to think through these 6 powerful and biblical truths (along with their verses) and read them every day. God’s Word has the power to transform our perspective and give us hope and peace. 6 powerful and biblical reasons for why you don’t have to worry… 1. The same God who created you can be trusted with the details of your life. Isaiah 26:3 “You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you.” 2. Worrying about the future hinders your efforts for today. Matthew 6:34 “Therefore do not be anxiousFull Post

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July 23, 2018
Friday Nights and the Single Girl

Another Friday night. Another Friday night alone. Another Friday night single. Those words echo endlessly in my head, keeping perfect time with my beating heart. I know if I want to silence them, there’s only one way. I climb into my bed, grab my Bible off my nightstand, and open it. Instantly, I feel God’s peace surround me as I begin turning the pages. Lonely Friday nights can be painfully tough if you’re a single female. At 33, I’ve never had a boyfriend, I’ve only been on a handful of dates (probably less than 10), and I never expected my life to look like this. I expected that at 33Full Post

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July 20, 2018
Why Sexting Isn’t God’s Best for Single Women

“I just don’t know what to do!” she said to me, with a discouraged look on her face. “One of my friends is sending nude pictures to her boyfriend and I feel like I should say something to her. I don’t think it’s a good idea…but I’m just not sure what to say!” This is a real conversation I had with a teen girl after a Girl Defined church event. She was totally discouraged about her friend’s sexting habits but had no idea what to say to her friend. As much as I’d like to hide under a bushel and believe that sexting and nude-photo-sharing is rare, it’s not.Full Post

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July 18, 2018
How to Build Friendships

WATCH VIDEO We live in a society that is filled with online connections. From Instagram to Snapchat, to Twitter,  to Facebook, to our cell phones, we have the ability to connect on a 24/7 basis. Despite all of our online connections, many of us feel alone, unloved, and friendless.  So what can we do? How can we build good and lasting friendships with other girls? How can we connect with others in a real and personal way? Here are three practical actions steps that you can take to begin building good and godly friendships: 1. Take ownership. 2. Take the first step. 3. Focus on others. In all ofFull Post

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July 13, 2018
Modest Summer Outfit Ideas

WATCH VIDEO  Combining fashion and modesty during the hot summer months can be really hard to do. It often feels like summer trends are all about the teeny-tiny shorts and itsy-bitsy shirts. So what’s a girl to do? Recently, the two of us have discovered an online store that has completely revolutionized our summer shopping experience. In today’s video, we’re going to show you some of our favorite modest finds for our summer wardrobe. WATCH VIDEO

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July 6, 2018
Trusting Your Unknown Future to a Known God

“It’s just so hard to trust God with my future when I have no idea what’s going to happen,” she said in a discouraged tone. “I mean…I want to trust God, but it’s just really hard for me. What if I never get married?” I listened as my friend shared her heart with me. She was single and really struggling to trust God with her love life. She was in her late twenties and was wondering if marriage would ever become a reality. Trusting God with the unknowns of the future can be one of the hardest things to do. There’s so much uncertainty in the unknown. “What ifFull Post

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July 4, 2018
6 Red Flags to Look For in a Romantic Relationship

WATCH VIDEO  When it comes to relationships, every single one of them will face struggles and differences…what we’re talking about here are bigger things that should cause you to stop and get advice. Keep in mind that red flags will vary in severity. Not every red flag is an automatic deal breaker. Each flag needs to be taken into thoughtful consideration within the context of the individual relationship. 6 Red Flags to Look For in a Romantic Relationship He has a shallow relationship with God. He pulls you down spiritually. He’s stuck in sinful addiction. He pressures you to compromise sexually. Wise people in your life don’t support theFull Post

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July 2, 2018
How to Mentor and Disciple Another Girl

I sat in the conference session with my eyes wide open. It was one of those moments where every word spoken pierced straight into my heart. As the speaker shared about his passion for mentorship and discipleship, I knew my life would never be the same. After that conference, my life took a drastic turn for the better. I went from having head knowledge about the importance of discipleship to having a heart and passion for it. I was turning into a girl who deeply desired to reach out and minister to the young women in my sphere of influence. It was like I was beginning to see withFull Post

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June 27, 2018
Erotica: Should Christian Women Read It?

WATCH VIDEO  He’s stunningly handsome. She’s drop-dead gorgeous. He’s rich. She’s sexy. He desperately wants a woman in his life. She’s longing for some strong male attention. They meet. They fall in love. It’s not long before their steamy romance turns intensely sexual. Their fantasy seems too good to be true. What is portrayed as the perfect love story and sexual relationship entrances modern women with every page they turn.   This is erotica. As it stands, “erotica is the fastest-selling genre of books selling to women.”  This genre of literature is created for one purpose and one purpose only — to stimulate and arouse sexual desire within you.Full Post

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June 24, 2018
A California Love Story

He started out as just another “You should meet him” conversation.  I stood arranging flowers with my friend Mrs. Ludlam, preparing for the evening’s dance event. “There’s this guy coming tonight…and I just think the two of you would hit it off.  He’s a seriously solid, godly guy with a sweet family. You’ll know him when you see him; tall, dark, and handsome.  His name is Richard Wickham.” Richard Wickham? That’s his name?  Seriously great name. I’d had several similar kind recommendations from mom-friends before.  I was 21 and unattached, busily engaged with endeavors like school, piano teaching, and ministry.  While marriage was a very present and cherished hope,Full Post

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June 22, 2018
How to Initiate Friendships When You Feel Left Out and Forgotten

Have you ever been left out by a friend? Have you ever felt like a certain friend wasn’t reaching out to you enough? Unfortunately, when stuff like this happens, our natural tendency is to complain and whine about what the other person (or group of people) isn’t giving us. We complain that they aren’t loving us enough, caring about us enough, initiating conversation with us enough, etc. Instead of doing something about it, we sit back and throw ourselves an internal pity-party. I know, because I’ve done it many times. However, about eight years ago my entire perspective took a 180-degree turn. I learned one of the most valuableFull Post

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June 20, 2018
Untold Truths about Dressing Modestly

WATCH VIDEO  We live in a culture where modesty isn’t valued at all anymore We’re taught that it’s completely normal to uncover 90% of our skin. We’re told that less is more. That being sexy is the most important thing. The two of us feel this pressure and we’re guessing you do too! It’s so important for us, as women, to pause and think about why we do what we do. Why do we wear clothes? Why do we want to dress with decency? Why do we value modesty? Unless we can answer those questions from a truly biblical perspective, we won’t fully grasp God’s heart for us in thisFull Post

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June 17, 2018
136 Questions to Ask in a Relationship

I can’t even begin to count how many of you have asked me for this list of questions. Ever since I announced that Dav (my fiance) and I worked through this list of questions during our dating relationship, hundreds of you have asked me for this list. If you’re in a relationship, I would encourage you to use this list as a resource to help you get to know your boyfriend/fiance better. If you want to be in a relationship, I encourage you to use this list as a tool to help you think through each one of the answers. This is a long list, but it does notFull Post

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June 15, 2018
Unfiltered Beauty: Embracing Your Face Without a Filter

I angled the phone. Smiled. Clicked capture. My sister had just purchased a new smartphone, and I wanted to try out the camera. It had more filters and options than my own “next door to a dumb phone” device, which, of course, meant better selfies. I tried out every single filter, loving the results. I clicked an icon in the corner, which brought up three more options. The first was called “slim face.” Curious, I moved the bar all the way to the right and watched in awe as my face narrowed before my eyes. My cheeks hollowed until it looked like I was sucking on lemons. I laughed,Full Post

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June 13, 2018
Bethany Talks Engagement and Marriage

WATCH VLOG You have questions. She has answers. Bethany has been engaged to her best friend, David, for about two and half weeks and she is busy getting ready for married life. Because of Bethany’s long-standing reputation as a single (twenty-nine years strong), many of you are wondering what it’s like for her to finally be engaged. Is she excited about the wedding? Is she nervous? What has she been learning? How did she know that David was the one?  In a candid conversation, Bethany’s answers all of those questions and more. WATCH VLOG

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June 11, 2018
One Thing Every Single Woman Needs to Know

Since the day I got engaged to my Fiance David, I’ve been asked a similar question over and over again. Messages from single women on Instagram, Facebook, and email all want to know the same thing. Now that I’m engaged, what is the one thing I want single women to know? Now that I’ve passed my full on single days, I guess many of you are curious what I have to say looking back on that season. It’s an interesting thought and a great question. I’ve been thinking quite about it a bit over the past few days. To be honest, my single years (in my late twenties) wereFull Post

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June 8, 2018
Why Suicide is Never the Right Solution

The news of Kate Spade committing suicide broke my heart. The reality of suicide is a sobering and tragic act that leaves behind more questions than solutions. Most of us will never know the depth of personal struggles that Kate was facing, but we know that she was hurting. She felt hopeless. For her, the only solution that seemed right was to end her life. In the wake of her tragic suicide (and others like it), the media is never quite sure how to respond. It’s a confusing puzzle. Why would someone as beautiful and talented and successful as Kate want to end her life? From a billion dollarFull Post

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June 6, 2018
Summer Favs: Books, Music, Apps, Podcasts & Blogs

WATCH VIDEO  When it comes to those long and relaxing summer days, it can be so easy to slack on the spiritual side of our lives. Way too often we work hard on our tan and forget to work hard on our relationship with God. To help you continue growing your relationship with Jesus, we are recommending some of our favorites. Books: Kristen’s Pick: Women of the Word Bethany’s Pick: Lies Young Women Believe (or Lies Women Believe )  Music: Kristen’s Pick: Vertical Church Worship Band Bethany’s Pick: Elevation Worship Apps: Kristen’s Pick: She Reads Truth Bethany’s Pick: Read Scripture Podcasts: Kristen’s Pick: Revive Our Hearts  Bethany’s Pick: Set Apart Girl Podcast Blogs:Full Post

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June 1, 2018
Pursuing Christ-Centered Boundaries in a Romantic Relationship

With a pen and paper in hand, Zack and I sat down to write out a list of physical boundaries we wouldn’t cross. Our relationship had recently shifted from being “just friends” to officially dating. With a desire to pursue sexual purity, we both thought it would be helpful to write down some specific physical boundaries. After several hours of talking about various scenarios and specific situations, we finalized our list. With a premature sense of accomplishment, we each pinned the list in our rooms and smiled at our apparent wisdom and godliness. However, as good as our lists may have seemed, we quickly realized how easy it wasFull Post

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May 30, 2018
True Beauty and Worth for the Christian Girl

WATCH VIDEO  Most of us, as modern Christian girls, don’t know what God’s design is, so we’re listening to the loudest voices in society. There a lot of loud voices telling us what it means to be a girl/woman. We get it! It can be so hard. Today we want to dig into what God says about His good design. Unlike the culture’s opinions, which are ALWAYS changing…God’s design is timeless. God’s design for womanhood transcends time and cultures and is always relevant. When it comes to your true beauty and worth, what does God’s Word have to say? Here are two practical truths about God’s design for you. #1 ChristFull Post

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May 28, 2018
Five Ways to Draw Closer to God When He Feels Far Away

Written by: Lauren Palmer I was sitting at the table across from my best friends at our favorite coffee shop. I hadn’t seen my friends for a while, so we spent some time catching up on all the news going on in our lives. I wanted to have a good time with my friends, but for some reason, I just wasn’t enjoying myself. I felt empty. In that moment –it dawned on me. I felt empty and alone, despite being surrounded by my friends, because I hadn’t been nurturing the relationship that is the most important: my relationship with God. I’m sure I’m not the only one who has felt likeFull Post

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May 25, 2018
What’s the Difference Between Love and Infatuation?

I clearly remember the first time I thought I was falling in love. The feelings were so strong. Glancing across the basketball gym, my eyes locked onto a tall athletic dreamboat. He was so cute. My heart picked up the pace and my hands got sweaty. He glanced my way and our eyes met. The butterflies in my stomach went wild. Surely this was love at first sight! We were destined to be together. I could just feel it. He was my soulmate! All I needed to do now was figure out his name. Thinking back on my first “cupid-struck” moment makes me laugh. I was twelve-years-old and lovestruckFull Post

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May 23, 2018
Good Questions to Ask Early in the Relationship

WATCH VIDEO You like him. He likes you. The chemistry is there. Now what? Where do you go from here? Navigating the relationship process can be exciting and totally confusing all at the same time. Figuring out if this person is someone you want to spend your life with can be really hard. How do you get to know someone beyond the “surface level” connection? How do you get to know who they really are and what they’re genuienly all about? Prior to marrying Zack, I was given a piece of advice that proved to be extremely helpful in taking things to a deeper level. They said, “the bestFull Post

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May 21, 2018
How do I Stay Content When all of my Friends are Getting Married?

I was sixteen years old and hanging out with some of my best girl-friends. The four of us were full of ideas about our futures. We had big plans. Especially when it came to our future relationships. The four of us were sure that marriage would be apart of our lives. I clearly remember sitting at a little cafe with my besties and taking “votes” on which one of us would get married first. It wasn’t a matter of “would we get married” it was simply a matter of “when.” Little did I know that my “when” wouldn’t happen for over 14 years from that moment. Never in aFull Post

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May 18, 2018
3 Signs of a True and Godly Friendship

She had flawless, tan skin. Her hair swished down her back in silky brown perfection (not a frizzy braid like mine). Oversized overalls were her staple attire and, somehow, she managed to make them unfathomably cute. She dazzled everyone with her bright, catching smile. I was in 7th grade, and I idolized Jenna. I wanted her effortless popularity. I longed to be enveloped into her close circle of friends. All I could ever achieve was some sort of half-hearted, pitiful sidekick role. I felt…on the fringe. Never perfect enough. When it comes to choosing a friend, what qualities come to mind? Someone who’s funny? Smart? Godly? Talented? Stylish? Just…whoever’sFull Post

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May 16, 2018
How to Go From Singleness to Marriage with Max & Bri

WATCH VIDEO As you look around at young married couples today, have you ever wondered, “how did they meet?” Or, “how did they know they wanted to get married?” Or, “what did their relationship process actually look like?” If you’ve ever wondered any of those questions, you’re in for a treat today! We’re chatting with Max and Bri, a young married couple, and they’re sharing with us snippets from their dating relationship and how they went from singleness to marriage. From the beginning, their goal was to honor God throughout the relationship process and go about things in an intentional way. If you desire to build a Christ-centered relationshipFull Post

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May 14, 2018
Why I’m Not Living With My Boyfriend

Today marks seven months since my boyfriend and I went out on our first day. I still remember that day like it was yesterday. The warm weather, the butterflies in my stomach, the nervous anticipation, the cute restaurant, and the amazing conversations. David and I have had some amazing conversations since that first date. Surprisingly enough, living together has never been one of them. We’ve never discussed it. It’s just one of those things that neither of us would even consider as a good option for our relationship. Trust me, it’s not because of a lack of feelings or lack of excitement. The two of us are crazy aboutFull Post

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May 11, 2018
4 Ways to Bring Femininity Into Your Love Life

If you’ve read anything about my love story with Zack, you know that there was quite a bit of time between when we met and when we actually got into a relationship. This was an extremely hard time for me. For three long years, I wondered if anything would ever happen between us. We were slowly growing in our friendship during this time, but Zack wasn’t making any moves. I could tell he was interested, but for some reason unbeknownst to me, he didn’t initiate a romantic relationship (more on that here). This is where things got tricky for me. Being a go-getter kind of girl, I desperately wantedFull Post

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May 9, 2018
Sex and the Single Girl with Dr. Juli Slattery

WATCH THE VIDEO  Have you ever wondered things like, why does my sexuality matter to God? Or, can I be single and sexual? Or, what should I do with my sexual temptations? If so, you’re going to love today’s video! We had the opportunity to chat with Dr. Juli Slattery who is an expert on all topics regarding our sexuality. Without shying away from the “hard” questions, Dr. Slattery does an amazing job of presenting truth in a completely relevant, yet totally tasteful way. She is an amazing Christian woman who is passionate about equipping modern women with God’s vision for sexual intimacy and sexual design.  She says, “The average single Christian hasFull Post

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May 7, 2018
Trusting God When Life isn’t What You Expected

I remember the very moment it happened. It was a moment I never expected to face. A moment I had hoped and prayed wouldn’t become my future. Around the 24 year mark, I found myself in one of the most daunting seasons of my entire life. I found myself heartbroken, lonely and facing a future of singleness that I seriously did not want to face. I didn’t feel like God was being good to me during that season. I felt like He was a good God to others but maybe wasn’t such a good God to me. I wondered if maybe God had forgotten me. Being a single woman inFull Post

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May 4, 2018
4 Things That Surprised Me in My First Year of Marriage

Getting back from my honeymoon and settling into my new life with Zack was a really sweet time. I remember eating dinner on a cardboard box for several weeks while we tried to find a dining room table set. There was just something simple and sweet about this new season of life. We painted our walls together, we bought decorations together, we decided on a couch together…it was awesome. We loved living life side by side. Prior to marriage, I had heard mixed reviews from married couples about their “first-year of marriage.” Some couples talked about it like it was a toddler’s “terrible twos,” kind of stage, while othersFull Post

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May 2, 2018
Love and Relationships Q & A

WATCH VIDEO A few days ago we asked you to send us some of your best questions about love, romance, guys, relationships and marriage. After looking through all of them, we hand picked 4 questions to answer in today’s video. How can I start preparing for marriage now, during my younger single years?  What would you say is the most unexpected thing about being in a relationship? How do I keep my focus on God when all I really want is a boyfriend? Is it wrong to date a guy who is younger than you?  Navigating the areas of love and romance can be complicated and confusing at times.Full Post

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April 30, 2018
God’s Vision for True Love and Lasting Relationships

I’ll admit it…the first thing that caught my eye about Zack wasn’t his godly character. It was his tan skin and muscles. He was just so stinkin’ cute (and still is). My stomach got butterflies. My hands got sweaty. My mind started dreaming.  So let me ask you this: Was I experiencing true love at first sight? Did cupid hit me with one of his arrows? Was I “in love?”  Well…not exactly. My feelings for Zack were very real, but they weren’t necessarily signs of true love.  What I was experiencing at that moment was a physical and sexual attraction to Zack. That attraction could lead me towards trueFull Post

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April 27, 2018
6 Questions to Ask Before Creating an Online Dating Profile

He was cute. She was pretty. He was confident. She was as sweet as apple pie. He was strong. She was beautiful. Jeremy and Katie are one very attractive couple. Not only are they attractive, but they are really godly too! They are both extremely involved in their church, missions, and love their families very well. They are just an all-around solid godly couple. Rewind a few years and these two amazing individuals didn’t know the other existed. How did they meet? Online of course. Online dating. What used to be somewhat of a sketchy, unreliable, embarrassing tool for meeting other singles, has now become an industry standard. Online dating isFull Post

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April 25, 2018
Part 4: A Love Story Worth Fighting For

WATCH VIDEO  As we look around, we don’t see very many lasting and vibrant marriages. Sadly, many marriages aren’t even making it past the 5-year mark. Even in the midst of such relational devastation, the two of us believe that lasting love is possible. In fact, we interviewed four different women who’ve been married for 30, 40, and  50 plus years. We asked them to share some of their advice with the rest of us. Here is a snippet of what they shared in our new book, Love Defined. You can read everything they had to say in chapter 17 of, Love Defined.  Advice from the married women: Yvonne Welch (married sinceFull Post

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April 23, 2018
Does Being Single Make Me Less Sexual?

I’m twenty-nine years old and I’ve never had sex. It’s not because I don’t want to, it’s just because I’ve chosen to wait until I’m married to have sex. Throughout my many years of being single and not having sex, I’ve had a lot of questions.   I’ve wondered about many aspects of my purity and my sexuality. I’m sure you can relate on so many levels. I don’t care if you’ve had sex, never had sex, or feel totally awkward talking about, we all have questions. We all wonder about our sexuality.   Thinking about my own life, I wondered questions like: Do I become more of aFull Post

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April 20, 2018
Kristen’s Love Story with Zack – Part 2

“With the sun setting over the beautiful Texas hill country, Zack got down on one knee and asked me to become his wife. As a gorgeous diamond ring sparkled in front of me, I looked into his brown eyes and couldn’t imagine spending my life with anyone else. With tears of joy streaming down my face, I emphatically said, “Yes!” After a big hug, Zack put the ring on my finger and we just stood there soaking in this incredible moment. I knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that Zack Clark was the man I wanted to marry. He was the man I had been praying for sinceFull Post

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April 18, 2018
Part 3: Physical Boundaries in a Romantic Relationship

WATCH VIDEO  Looking back over the past six months of my (Bethany’s) relationship, the area of physical boundaries has been a huge topic of conversation. Figuring out what my boyfriend and I will do, and what we will not do, has been a process. I totally get it. It’s hard and confusing. To help you begin thinking through the area of physical boundaries, the two of us took the best of the best from our brand new book, Love Defined.  In today’s vlog, we share two very specific points with you on the topic of boundaries pulled straight from the book. If you’re currently in a romantic relationship, or you’d likeFull Post

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April 16, 2018
Kristen’s Love Story with Zack – Part 1

It was a warm Texas afternoon in May of 2006 when I laid eyes on Zack Clark for the very first time. I still remember the exact moment I noticed him. I was attending a Christian conference with my family and He was sitting several rows in front of us. I’ll be honest, his strong and tall physique, sandy blonde hair, and tan skin were the first things that caught my eye. But after meeting him the next day, I could tell there was something special about this guy. As I watched him interact with the people around us, he seemed very genuine, kind, and a natural leader. IFull Post

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April 13, 2018
Seduction: Using Feminine Allure in the Right Way

Standing in front of my bedroom mirror, I checked-out at my new jeans. I thought to myself, you look seriously hot. I had been working out a lot, my skin was tan from being in the sun, and my new jeans were snug around my hips. Looking at myself up and down, I knew the guys would notice me. I wanted them to notice me. As a single girl, I wanted to be wanted. As I headed out the door to meet up with my friends, I suddenly felt very powerful and alluring. Even seductive. Without ever being formally taught, I knew how to use my femininity to get theFull Post

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April 11, 2018
Part 2: Embracing God’s Vision for Love and Romance

WATCH VIDEO  Check out Part 1 if you missed it! God created Love and Romance. God invented Marriage. He is the Creator, therefore He knows best. Instead of looking to Hollywood for answers about true love, we need to look to the author of love Himself.  Jesus put His love on display through His sacrificial actions. True love is an action, not an emotional feeling. “God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us” (Romans 5:8)  The two of us are so passionate about true love. Not the cheap imitation we often see on the silver screen. We mean true, Christ-centered, sacrificial love.Full Post

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April 9, 2018
Single and Ready to Mingle – Part 2

You are so ready to be married. Everything seems to be one-hundred-percent ready to go…minus the guy. If only God would bring him into your life *quickly* things could finally move along. Yep, that’s where many of us are finding ourselves. *BTW – If you missed Part 1 of the series, stop for a quick second and read that first* We have the desire and the want to, but there are no young men that seem to fit the bill. If only God would hurry up! Doesn’t He know that marriage is a good thing and we would be much better off as marrieds rather than as singles?? AsFull Post

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April 6, 2018
Single and Ready to Mingle – Part 1

It’s always interesting for me to reflect back on my earliest years of being single. The memories of finishing my teen years and entering my early twenties are pretty good ones. Even though I had already experienced serious heartbreak at this point (I went through a difficult breakup at 19), my future still seemed bright and hopeful. I was young, I was excited, and I was ready to explore what God might have for me as a single woman. Life seemed to be serving me what I wanted at this point in time (or at least what I thought I wanted) and I was happy. It wasn’t long afterFull Post

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April 4, 2018
Part 1: Seeing Through The Fairytale Facade

WATCH VLOG  When the two of us were in our late teens, we honestly believed relationships would just work themselves out. Deep down we believed the lie that good looks, big muscles, strong chemistry and serious infatuation would last forever. We quickly learned that this naive perspective was FAR from reality. We call this false view of love and romance, The Fairytale Facade. “The Fairy Tale Facade promotes the idea that we can completely ignore God’s design for love, sex, and romance, and still have lasting, satisfying results. It’s the idea that Hollywood can define love according to its own terms and still create happily ever afters. It’s the falseFull Post

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April 2, 2018
When God Doesn’t Give You What You Prayed For

I was desperate. With tears flowing down my face, I held my limp little puppy in my arms. This puppy had only been mine for 4 days. Addie was sweet and energetic and had the cutest little eyes. I was already deeply bonded with her. Even though she was just a dog, she came into my life after a hard season of two miscarriages. Having something small and little to care for was helpful for me. I had never owned a dog before, so this was a new experience. I was honestly shocked at how instantly attached and in-love one can become with their animal. I was also surprisedFull Post

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March 30, 2018
How Can I Know God’s Will For Me?

Which college should I attend? Who should be my best friend? When is it ok to date? If you are like me, you have wrestled with questions like these.  As we navigate through the path of young womanhood, how do we determine God’s will for the various questions that life presents?   God has given us His word so that we can understand His will for our lives.  Using scripture, let’s first debunk some biblical misinterpretations about different methods that are sometimes used by sincere Christians to determine God’s will.  Then we’ll look at scriptural truth that we can know about God’s will. Three Misinterpretations About God’s Will: 1.Full Post

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March 28, 2018
3 Tips for Marriage All Singles Should Know

WATCH VIDEO When Zack and I got married, we thought it was going to be a piece of cake. We’d read a bunch of marriage books, sought counsel, and learned from our parents’ godly examples. We thought we were set! But shortly into our first year, our eyes were opened to just how much more we needed to work on. We weren’t as ready as we thought.  We both quickly learned that sin and selfishness don’t just go away on the other side of the altar — they’re magnified. Looking back over these past seven years of marriage, we can now see the many things we didn’t fully understandFull Post

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March 23, 2018
Two Books That Will Radically Change Your Life as a Single

I was young. I was in love. Life was looking pretty good. As a naive twenty-something Christian girl, I had my entire future planned out. I would get married within the year and leave the worries of the single life behind me. Little did I know, everything was about to change. Less than twenty-four hours had passed and my entire life was turned upside down. I went from a girl in a relationship to a girl out of a relationship. Totally heartbroken by my new status as a single, I needed help and I needed it quick. Through blurry tear-filled-eyes, I scanned the books on my bookshelf. I’d collected quiteFull Post

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March 21, 2018
When You Feel Unloved and Forgotten

WATCH VIDEO Life can be really hard at times. Friends reject us. Parents get divorced. A Boyfriend ends the relationship. The list goes on. During these difficult times, it can often feel like we are unloved and totally forgotten. The circumstances around us tempt us to feel like even God has forgotten us. If you are going (or have gone) through a season where you feel unloved and forgotten, this video is for you. We’re sharing three powerful truths that will help you understand God’s never-ending love and faithfulness…no matter the circumstances. WATCH VIDEO

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March 19, 2018
Biblical Submission: What it Is and What it Isn’t (Part 2)

In part 1 of this post, I shared my initial negative reaction to the word submission when I got married. It wasn’t until I understood God’s bigger purpose for marriage and His intent for husbands and wives that things made sense to me. I shared how I didn’t have to change my personality or leave my brain at the door to be a biblical wife. If you missed part 1, take a minute to quickly read it HERE (you’ll want to!), then come back and dive into part 2 with me. Let’s unpack the true meaning of Biblical submission. This is not an exhaustive definition because I can’t coverFull Post

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March 16, 2018
Biblical Submission: What it Is and What it Isn’t (Part 1)

I looked into his handsome brown eyes and repeated two little words that would change my life forever. “I do.” From that moment on, I officially became Mrs. Zachary Clark. Not only did I walk away with a new name that day, but I also walked away with a new title and role. I was now a wife. As someone who grew up in the church, I was familiar with Biblical phrases like “the husband’s role” or “the wife’s role,” so these weren’t new concepts to me. My parents modeled a healthy and beautiful marriage my entire life, so I never had a problem with  these biblical “titles.” However,Full Post

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March 14, 2018
Why Christian Girls Post Seductive Selfies

WATCH VIDEO In a culture that equates beauty with seduction, it can be confusing to understand the difference. Often times we, as modern Christian women, find ourselves buying into cultures version of beauty and mimic what’s upheld to us in the movies and magazines. Instead of copying what we see in Hollywood, we need to rethink why we do what we do. When it comes to the pictures we take and the selfies we post, we need to take a step back and reevaluate our heart’s motives. WATCH VIDEO

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March 12, 2018
Biblical Womanhood Promotes Passion Not Passivity

She was a fearless woman. Willing to give up her very life for the cause. Nothing could stop her from doing it. She knew it was worth it. She knew God had put on earth for this cause. With courage in her heart and boldness in her eyes, she approached the King unannounced. An act no one dared to do unless they were willing to die. She was willing to die. She proved it through her actions. Esther was a woman like none other. She was a woman that shreds the “biblical womanhood is wimpy” argument to pieces. She was anything but a wimp. She was more bold andFull Post

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March 9, 2018
You Have a Crush On Him…Now What?

I still remember my very first crush. I was probably ten years old (at the most). I would get butterflies every time “he” walked by. That crush lasted for several months, and then our schedules changed and I didn’t see him anymore. I decided to move on to a new cute boy. Then there was my first teenage crush. I was 14 years old and fell head-over-heels for a cute basketball stud. That crush lasted for a long time. In fact, throughout most of my high school years he was kind of my “background” crush. I always had my eye on him. Nothing ever happened between us though (regardlessFull Post

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March 7, 2018
Making Your Single Years Count

WATCH VIDEO You are single and you’re not sure how to handle this season. You want to be in a relationship, but it’s just not happening. What are you supposed to do with these unwanted, unwelcomed, and unexpected single years? The two of us get it. We’ve been in your shoes. In fact, Bethany is 29 years old and she’s still unmarried. She’s no stranger to the single life and the confusion that this season can bring. If you long for answers and desire to make your single years count, the two of us have insight for you. Let’s discuss the specifics that made all the difference in our lives and we believeFull Post

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March 4, 2018
Good Christian Girl, Stop Finding Worth in Your Goodness

I’m her. I’m the good girl. The girl who was born into a Christian home. The girl who memorized John 3:16 as soon as she could speak. The girl who never went through a rebellious stage. The girl who never had a boyfriend in high school and never dated around. Yep, that’s me. The good girl. I’m not bashing my good-girl-ness and I’m not boasting in it either. I’m just telling you that that’s my story. I have the “good girl” story. Here’s the other side of the good girl coin. If you’re a good girl, you can probably relate. Somehow along the journey of life, the Enemy creeps inFull Post

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March 2, 2018
Are You a Lady Wisdom or a Madame Folly?

What if you lived your whole life thinking you were a smart and empowered woman only to get to Heaven and discover you were actually quite foolish? Thoughts like these stop me in my tracks all the time. They scare me. The thought of spending my whole life striving after what I believed to be right, only to find out I was wrong, is a sobering and tragic thought. We live in a day and age where examining our motives, character, actions, and thoughts isn’t something we’re encouraged to do. Instead, we’re encouraged to be “empowered” in the things that make us feel good. The things that make usFull Post

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February 28, 2018
How to Build Strong Relationships with Your Siblings

WATCH VIDEO People are usually shocked with they find out that we’re from a family of eight kids. Not only are we large in size, but most of us are over 6 feet tall (even the girls)! We are one big, tall, Texas family. Being from a large family has been a total blast for the two of us. We’ve absolutely loved it! There’s never a dull moment. But, like any normal family, we’ve faced our own fair share of challenges, differences, and conflicts. Even though we’re all from the same family, we are all very unique in our personalities. Being different is a good thing, but it hasFull Post

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February 26, 2018
Can I Wear a Purity Ring if I’m Not a Virgin?

I was 13 years old when my dad gave me my purity ring. He took me to the jewelry store, showed me the rings, and let me pick one out. I chose a silver ring, with swirly shapes, surrounding a purple gem. It was the perfect ring in my little girl eyes. Later that day, my dad asked me what commitments I wanted my purity ring to represent. I shared with him a few specifics. He continued explaining to me that my ring was only an outward symbol of my inward commitment towards purity. It was very clear that my purity ring didn’t make me pure. The ring didn’tFull Post

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February 21, 2018
The Christian Girl’s Guide to Starting a Ministry

WATCH VIDEO We live in a day and age where we, as Christian women, can reach people across the world. Thanks to modern technology and social media we now have the ability to interact and minister to women everywhere. Many of you have a passion for ministry and you want to use these amazing platforms to reach people…only you don’t know where to start. In today’s vlog, the two of us share 5 steps that we took in starting GirlDefined Ministries.  We know that starting a ministry can be overwhelming and totally confusing. Where do I start? Which platforms do I use?  How do I narrow down my vision? WhatFull Post

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February 18, 2018
Determined to Chase after God Instead of Guys

I spotted my target. He was tall, lanky, and had a head full of bushy brown hair. I convinced my sixteen-year-old self that he was drop-dead gorgeous (in a manly sort of way, of course). There was a major problem, though. My best friend thought he was gorgeous, too. Uh-oh. Girl fight! Besties crushing on the same guy is never a good thing. After talking about our crush, my friend and I decided to have a competition. Neither of us had actually met this guy—we’d only stared and admired—and we wanted to change that. We decided that whoever had the most guts to meet him and get to knowFull Post

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February 14, 2018
Practical Advice for Dating and Marriage

WATCH VIDEO Whether you’re single, in a relationship, or married, we have something extra special for you on today’s vlog. For the first time ever, Zack Clark (Kristen’s husband) and David Beal (Bethany’s boyfriend) have joined us on the set to share insights and advice on dating and marriage! If you’ve had questions about the dating process and how to go about it in an intentional way, Bethany and David share a peek into their relationship and what they’re currently doing to get to know one another. And for all of you married gals out there (and those of you who want to get married), Kristen and Zack share a fewFull Post

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February 7, 2018
What We Do For Our Personal Bible Time

WATCH VIDEO Digging into God’s Word can feel totally confusing at times. Where do I start? How long do I read? What do I read? What studies do I use? What’s helpful? How do I go about this?  The two of us get it. We know that having a deep, meaningful and consistent Bible time can be hard to do. It’s hard to know what to do and how to do it. The two of us want to invite you into our own lives and show you what we do for our Bible time. our hope is that this will give you some encouragement and insight as you striveFull Post

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February 5, 2018
When You Feel Like the Last Single Girl Standing

It happened again. I sighed and stared down at the little heart displaying a new relationship status on Facebook. Yep, another girl down. One after the other, the girls my sister and I grew up with were dating and getting married, while we watched— still single, and not a Christian young man in sight. First, one “in a relationship” status popped up on Facebook. Then another. An engagement announcement, another relationship update, a wedding, more engagement pictures. The jewelry stores were surely running out of rings by now, right? My sister and I felt like the last single girls standing. With everyone else pairing up two by two, likeFull Post

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February 2, 2018
Why Safe-Sex Isn’t God’s Best for Your Relationship

Someone wrote an email to me recently and said, “The fact is, giving an abstinence-only sex education is not going to make things any safer. I believe there’s no harm in educating teenagers about safe sex.” This type of thinking is really popular today. There’s a huge push in our culture to indoctrinate teens with a “safer sex” education program. If you attend public school or watch any TV, you’ve probably been exposed to it. It goes something like this: “Teens are going to do it anyway, so we might as well teach them how to do it responsibly.” The mindset of our culture is that teens are soFull Post

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January 31, 2018
Where Do You Find Your Identity as a Woman?

WATCH VIDEO As girls, we often look around and compare ourselves to what other girls look like. We take note of what Hollywood is telling us about true love. We take note of what the popular girls are like. Then, without even realizing it, we create an internal checklist of what we “need” in order to be valuable. In chapter one of our book (Girl Defined: God’s Radical Design for Beauty, Femininity, and Identity) we call this problem the “Big Bad Identity Checklist.” Here’s what we’re talking about: “From the time we were little girls until now, our culture has been feeding us messages of what womanhood is all about.Full Post

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January 29, 2018
Lost Virginity Does Not Define Your Worth

She had the reputation of a harlot and a track record to back it up. If God was going to use a woman to impact history in amazing ways, he shouldn’t have used this woman. Why would God use her, a harlot, when there were so many other well-put-together women around? We don’t know all of the details of this woman’s story, but we do know this. Rahab, the prostitute, was the mother of Boaz (Ruth’s husband) and the great-grandmother of David (a man after God’s own heart). In fact, Rahab was honored to be one of the few women in the lineage of Jesus. Rahab the harlot, theFull Post

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January 26, 2018
Responding to Authority in a God-Honoring Way

We didn’t agree. There was tension. They couldn’t see things my way and I couldn’t see things their way. With my voice cracking and tears of frustration pouring down my face, I stomped back to my room. Say hello to my sixteen-year-old self, struggling with authority. Growing up, my parents and I always had a great relationship. But even great relationships don’t escape conflict. There were several occasions where my parent’s and I strongly disagreed about something. I was sure my way was better. In my anger, I would often respond to them in frustration, tears, and disrespect. A few hours would go by, then I would always feelFull Post

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January 24, 2018
Living to Be Liked vs. Living to Please God

WATCH VIDEO  Back in high school the two of us were desperately trying to maintain our “cool” teen girl image. In an attempt to hold onto our coolness, we would make our parents park our family’s big 12 passenger van as far out of sight as possible. We couldn’t risk losing our “cool” reputation and becoming “disliked” by our friends. When we, as young women, live to be liked and live for the approval of others, we enslave ourselves to the opinions of others. Instead of living to be liked, the two of us want to show you a much better, more joy-filled, and freeing way to live. WATCHFull Post

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January 22, 2018
Becoming a Godly Woman Takes Focus and Determination

A life-changing decision needed to be made and I was the only person who could make the final call. Deep in my heart, I knew there were only two options: God’s way or my own way. I remember sitting with my Bible, reading the book of Proverbs, and trying to fill my mind with Biblical insight. The more I read, the more confirmed the answer became. There was a problem though. I didn’t like the truth or the answer I knew I needed to make. Choosing to accept the insight and wisdom I was gleaning from the Bible meant I had to make a really hard decision. One IFull Post

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January 19, 2018
How Comparison Can Become Poison to Your Soul

It was already late in the evening when I found myself sitting in front of my laptop googling beauty tips: How can I put on my makeup in a way that conceals my trapezoidal face? What haircut would suit me best? Is there a secret to clear skin? Well, I’m the girl who always changes her hair color, the one who sleeps with coconut oil in her hair (my hair really seems healthier these days, I’m not kidding!), and tries out cosmetic products when friends tell her about how effective they are. It always takes place in the same way. At first, I’m very excited and hopeful that theFull Post

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January 17, 2018
What is a Good Age to Start a Romantic Relationship?

WATCH VIDEO When the two of us first started thinking about the topic of dating/courtship, we had a lot of questions. How is old enough? What is the purpose of a relationship? What’s a good way to go about dating? How can we be intentional? etc. Instead of trying to figure it all out on our own, we invited our parent’s wise counsel into this area of our lives. We wanted to know what they thought and why they thought it. We didn’t claim to have all the answers and we knew they could help us. After many late night discussions, the two of us came to some conclusions.Full Post

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January 15, 2018
Why I’m Still Saving My First Kiss for My Future Husband

The moment I announced my relationship with David the questions started flooding my inbox. Specifically questions about our physical boundaries. Will we hold hands? Do use a chaperone? Do we hug? Do we do stuff alone? What about being alone at night? In a house? Etc etc. I totally get it. I would be asking the exact same questions. In fact, I’ve asked other newly dating or courting couples those very same questions. I want to know what a healthy, God-honoring, Christ-centered relationship is supposed to look like. I want to know if there is a correct way to go about physical boundaries. Although the Bible does not giveFull Post

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January 12, 2018
Guys and Romance: Your Most Popular Questions Answered

When I was a single girl, I regularly had questions about guys rolling around in my head. From what I’ve seen, this is pretty normal for any single girl. I know many of you have guy questions too because you ask them through your comments, emails, and social media messages. So, these types of questions are so popular, I’ve decided to dedicate this post to your guy questions. I’ve hand-picked 4 of the most common questions I hear from you and have attempted to answer them in a nutshell. Ready? Here we go! Question 1: What is a good age to start dating? As many of you know, IFull Post

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January 8, 2018
Twenty Nine Years Old and Never Been Kissed

When I committed to this whole “saving my first kiss for marriage,” I never imagined I’d have to wait 29+ years. I imagined I would be married by twenty-one or twenty-two years old (okay, twenty-three at the latest). Trust me when I say that I never imagined I would be twenty-nine and never been kissed. That just wasn’t a part of my plan. My plans as a teen girl looked much different than what has become my actual reality. Even though I’m twenty-nine years old and remain a virgin, I’m so grateful to God for giving me the strength to hold to my commitments. In a world that tosses sexFull Post

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January 4, 2018
4 Goals for Your Love Life This Year

Maybe this will finally be my year for finding true love! I thought to myself. As the clock struck midnight, the New Year sparked feelings of hope and excitement. It had been several months since my devastating breakup and I was grateful to leave that behind. The New Year seemed to usher in a fresh start. Maybe I’ll meet the one this year. Maybe I’ll even get engaged! The start of a new year has a way of reigniting hope and rekindling dreams. There’s just something exhilarating about the potential to come. The mystery of the unknown. The possibility of dreams coming true! I remember feeling all of thoseFull Post

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January 3, 2018
3 Ways Porn Deceives Girls About Their Sexuality

WATCH VIDEO I, Bethany, was shocked to hear Jeff (the modeling recruiter) explain to me that all of his models will pose nude. If I wasn’t comfortable with the idea of posing nude, he didn’t want anything to do with me. That interview opened my (and Kristen’s) eyes to the deceptive lies that we, as women, are being fed about our sexuality. It opened our eyes even wider to the damage and dangers of porn in our culture. Porn is so dangerous because it can appear “harmless,” but it will totally wreck a girl’s view of herself in seconds. Porn educates. And it happens almost instantly. Here are 3Full Post

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December 29, 2017
Top 5 Most Shared and Liked Posts from 2017

Over this past year, many of you have shared how God used the GirlDefined blog posts and vlogs to help you overcome the darkest of sins, relationship struggles, guy complications, unfulfilled longings, growing in your walk with God, and much, much more. God is so good and He’s done amazing things in your lives (as we’ve learned from the many emails you all have sent us), and we praise Him for that! We, Kristen and Bethany, launched GirlDefined in 2014 with the prayer that God would use this ministry to do exactly what it’s doing: To help you fight the lies of our culture, discover God’s truth, and embraceFull Post

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December 27, 2017
8 Book Goals for Every Christian Girl

WATCH VIDEO If you’re not sure what to read, or you just need some fresh inspiration, here are eight of our all-time favorite books. 1. Finally Free: Fighting for Purity with the Power of Grace 2. Radical: Taking Back Your Faith from the American Dream 3. Letters to a Romantic: On Dating 4. The Meaning of Marriage: Facing the Complexities of Commitment with the Wisdom of God 5. 12 Ways Your Phone Is Changing You 6. Letters to My Daughters: The Art of Being a Wife 7. Know Why You Believe 8. Hope Heals: A True Story of Overwhelming Loss and an Overcoming Love These eight books have transformedFull Post

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December 25, 2017
Reflect with Kristen and Bethany on the Wonder of Jesus

Jesus. The name above all names. The person who changed the course of history. The reason we have hope. The reason we have purpose. The reason we can live for something more satisfying than climbing the corporate ladder, chasing beauty, or accumulating wealth. The two of us hope that you can take some time on Christmas Day to reflect on the wonder of Jesus. In the midst of the hustle and bustle of the day, take a moment to pause and remember the reason for the season. Take some time out of the busyness to slow down and reflect on the story of Jesus. Without Jesus, GirlDefined would haveFull Post

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December 22, 2017
Slow Down, Be Still, and Cherish Christ this Weekend

You’ve got to be kidding me! I thought. This is absolutely crazy. With my basket full of Christmas presents, I navigated my cart to the back of the insanely long checkout line. There had to be at least 30 people in front of me. I scanned the contents of various baskets as I passed by. Yep. They’re here doing the same thing. I thought. Why didn’t I plan better?! Everyone knows that last minute Christmas shopping at a really popular store is pretty much the worst idea ever. And here I was. Waiting in line at the store. Basket-to-basket with all the last minute shoppers. Frustration stirred inside of me.Full Post

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December 20, 2017
Trusting God When Life Doesn’t Make Sense

WATCH VIDEO  The story of Mary (mother of Jesus) is an amazing example of a young woman who chose to trust God despite her crazy-confusing circumstances. When the two of us stop and think about the reality of what Mary went through and experienced, it’s mind-blowing. She was just an average, everyday girl…just like you, just like me. Her life story is an amazing picture of how amazing and awesome God is. In fact, we’ve been personally challenged and encouraged by the story of this courageous young girl. Here are a few things we’ve learned about God from this intriguing and unusual story. WATCH VIDEO 

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December 18, 2017
Learning How to Grow in Love With Jesus

Can I make a confession? Digging into God’s Word on a daily basis is hard for me. I don’t typically wake up in the morning with a spring in my step, ready to dig into the Bible. I’m not saying I don’t want to read my Bible. I’m just saying that it’s hard. Even though I love God, I love His Word, I love learning, and I love growing in my faith, I still struggle to make it a priority day in and day out. But here’s what matters most: I don’t let that stop me. I don’t have the perfect personal devotional life, and I don’t think IFull Post

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December 15, 2017
12 Unusual Christmas Wishes for Every Christian Girl

I don’t know about you, but the Christmas season has a way of bringing out my best and worst. In the midst of a joyous party with family, I have find myself consumed with self-centered thoughts. Rather than focusing on the true Reason for the season…I subtly begin to view myself as the reason for the season. Everything is about my happiness and joy, right? Wrong. While wish lists, Christmas parties, and traditions are all fine and fun, I am realizing this year (more than ever before) that my heart needs a focus shift. My “wish list” needs a makeover. Instead of focusing on my desires and my wishes and my traditions this season, I am strivingFull Post

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December 13, 2017
What to do When All I Want for Christmas is a Boyfriend

WATCH VIDEO  It’s that time of year again. The radio is playing love songs. The movies portray nothing but perfect romance stories. And all of your friends seem to be “falling in love.” Christmas can be hard when it feels like cupid’s arrows are hitting everyone but you. Hot chocolate, Christmas carols, and warm fires just seem to pale in comparison to true love. And then that song comes on and taunts you with its words… “all I want for Christmas is you.“ If this December finds you thinking thoughts like, “all I want for Christmas is a boyfriend!” then today’s video was made just for you. Instead of strugglingFull Post

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December 11, 2017
50 Questions to Ask Yourself Before You Get the Guy

For the past few years, we’ve received many emails asking for help in the area of romantic relationships. How can I really know if he’s a solid guy? What if He’s not a Christian? How I do I know what to ask him? What topics are important to discuss? What are red flags? Am I ready for this? What if my parents don’t like him? Those questions (and questions like them) prompted me to write the blog post, 50 Questions to Ask Before Falling In Love. The comments that came from that blog post were encouraging. “Excellent!!! I have been looking for something like this.” “Thank you, Kristen andFull Post

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December 8, 2017
Becoming a Woman Who Sees Her Need for Jesus

I sat there staring at the screen as a wave of guilt and gratitude rushed over me. My heart was stirred by what I saw. These poor and desperate people longed for Jesus. They wanted Him. They waited for Him. They rejoiced when they finally saw Him. After a few seconds, Zack broke the silence. “Well, what did you think, babe?” he asked. We had just finished watching the first episode of a new and upcoming series called The Chosen. This new show is about the life of Christ through the eyes of the sinners who knew him best. The pilot episode was about Jesus’ birth, shown from theFull Post

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December 6, 2017
Living Strong When Christmas is Hard and Discouraging

WATCH VIDEO The Holiday Season can bring a lot of joy for some people and a lot of difficulties for others. If you’re feeling down and discouraged about something going on in your life, know that you’re not alone. The two of us decided to record this video because we know that life can be really hard at times. We know many young women who are dealing with difficult things right now. We know that you might be dealing with something really difficult in your own life right now. Instead of allowing that hard circumstance or discouraging situation to ruin the month of December for you, choose to fight back andFull Post

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December 4, 2017
Wisdom In Choosing to Wait for a Man of God

I’m in my early twenties with many friends in serious relationships, getting engaged and getting married. I’ve been to 5 weddings in the last 2 years. In that space of time, I’ve been on a small handful of dates and tried to test the waters with a few guys. I may have lain in bed imagining our lives together after the night we met. I may have placed them on a pedestal, creating high expectations that they could never fill. I may even have been so desperate to persuade myself to try even though I felt no connection to them whatsoever. In that space of time, I met aFull Post

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December 1, 2017
12 Days of Christmas with Girl Defined

I would never, ever think of myself as a Christmas Grinch. I love the Christmas season so much! I play Christmas music 24/7. I embrace gift giving wholeheartedly. I love the seasonal coffee drinks. I’m nothing like the Grinch. Or so I thought. With Christmas music playing in the background of my house, a shocking reality hit me recently. Deep down — way beneath the surface of my holiday smile — I have a lot of Grinch-like tendencies. Although the Grinch is portrayed as someone who despises Christmas, that’s not his true issue.  His real heart issue is that he loves himself more than anyone else. He is selfish and self-centered. He is consumed withFull Post

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November 29, 2017
The Pros and Cons of Online Dating

WATCH VIDEO If you’ve ever thought about using online dating, this vlog will help you to weigh the pros and cons before getting online. Possible Pros of Online Dating: 1. It can help differentiate the intentional from the non-intentional. 2. It expands your pool of fish. 3. Personality, religion, and preference matches. 4. You can make your marriage interest known. Possible Cons of Online Dating: 1. Dangers of the unknown. 2. Time consuming. 3. Isolates the relationship. 4. Possible lack of trust in God. 5. Rushing through the single years. WATCH VIDEO

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November 27, 2017
How Old Should I Be Before Getting into a Serious Relationship?

I looked at the caller ID on my pink razor flip phone and immediately got sweaty palms. I was 16 years old and was committed to only pursuing a relationship when I was ready or able to consider the possibility of marriage. As a 16-year-old girl, I knew I wasn’t ready. And I knew the guy calling on the other line wasn’t ready either. With feelings of hesitation, I answered his call. “Hello, this is Bethany” “Hey, Bethany!! How ya doing today?” The conversation continued and the expected happened. Jeremy expressed his interest and asked me if I would consider starting a relationship with him. I didn’t want toFull Post

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November 22, 2017
How Choosing Gratitude will Change Your Life

WATCH VLOG  As Christian girls, we have a million reasons to give thanks…and the biggest is our Salvation through Jesus. We should be the leading example of gratitude and joyfulness. Yet sadly, we’re often not; and it’s largely because we choose to focus on the wrong things. Choosing gratitude is the key to becoming a joy-filled girl, regardless of what happens in life. Here are 20 Amazing Reasons to be Grateful today… WATCH VLOG 

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November 17, 2017
Fighting Lust with the Power of Gratitude

When I was a teen girl, I remember having moments where I viewed God’s boundaries for sexual purity as a bit…well — annoying. Striving for purity in my heart and mind wasn’t easy, and I struggled to keep my thoughts pure. I would find myself grumbling in my heart about how tough the single life was. Why would God give me all of these sexual desires as a single woman? What if I never get married? Then what?! How am I supposed to honor God when it’s so hard? Deep down, I knew God’s design for purity was good. I knew sexual intimacy was reserved for marriage alone, butFull Post

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November 15, 2017
How to Get Through a Hard Breakup

Watch Vlog So how should we, as Christian girls, handle tough breakups? How do we survive the pain and loss of losing a relationship? We want to take you inside our breakups and show you what we did to survive the pain. 1. Trust in the Lord with all your heart. 2. Put your hope in God.  3. Surround yourself with godly wisdom.  4. Fill your mind with truth.  5.  Keep busy by serving.  “But blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in him” Jeremiah 17:7 “Yes, my soul, find rest in God; my hope comes from him” Psalm 62:5 Watch Vlog

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November 13, 2017
3 Powerful Truths for Embracing True Beauty and Lasting Worth

I looked in the mirror and knew exactly what I was missing. More eyeliner. I’m not talking about a nice top line that frames the eye and accentuates the eyes. No. I’m talking about raccoon style eyeliner. I’m talking about loads and loads around the top and bottom of the eye. I’m talking about so much eyeliner that the onlooker might literally mistake me for a raccoon. Yep. That was my go-to look in high school. I craved the attention of guys and extra eyeliner was my means of trying to catch that attention. Why did I want their attention? I (like many young women) figured that my worthFull Post

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November 10, 2017
Why Modern Girls Should Champion the Role of Motherhood

What if you had to pay your mom $40 every time you spent time with her? That’d be crazy right? Well…not if you live in New York City. Apparently having a mom to talk to is worth a lot more than most of us realize. In fact, a lady named Nina decided to start a business based on that idea. Nina is in her 60’s, lives in NYC, and talks to a lot of young people who claim they don’t have good mother figures. Apparently they want an older, wiser woman to talk to, but don’t know who to turn to. So, Nina decided to become a professional mom.Full Post

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November 7, 2017
Hope for the Single Woman Longing for Marriage

WATCH VLOG Unwanted and extended years of singleness are an ever-growing reality amongst many of our lives.  Dealing with an unexpected season of singleness can be a source of great struggle, frustration, and loneliness for those of us who have found ourselves in this position. In today’s vlog, Bethany opens up and shares how she’s found hope as an unmarried woman herself. She shares her favorite verses, quotes, and truths that have helped her have true hope throughout these unexpected years of singleness. True hope can be your reality too. The two of us encourage you to meditate on Proverbs 3:5-6 and to make the prayer by Betty ScottFull Post

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November 6, 2017
Breaking Free From the Beauty Comparison Trap

Like little girls my sweet friend and I sat on the floor with our legs crisscrossed and dreamed about her soon-to-be-marriage. As the giggles and squeals slowly wore off, I asked my friend if she was ready to share all of herself and her life with another person. With a thoughtful look on her face, she went on to explain that although she was really excited, there were definitely some inner fears she was having to work through. She went on to openly and honestly share about her struggles with comparison. “It’s hard to not compare myself to the magazines cover models and the perfect images I see onFull Post

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November 3, 2017
What Love, Weddings, and Marriage Teach us About God

She was absolutely breathtaking. With a smile the size of Texas and eyes as bright as the sun, she slowly walked toward her groom. This was the long awaited moment in both of their lives. With his gaze locked onto the radiant face of his bride, the groom smiled and shook his head in delightful astonishment. She was walking…toward him. He had pursued and won the heart of a godly, beautiful, and joy-filled woman. I know this couple personally, and their entire love story was marked by faithfulness, purity, and Christ-centered love. As I watched the ceremony unfold, my heart rejoiced for this couple and the union that wasFull Post

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November 1, 2017
The Modern Woman’s Struggle with Sexual Sin

WATCH VIDEO  Sexual sin has often received the label of being a “male problem.” However, lust isn’t a male problem — it’s a human problem, and women are desperately struggling too. If you struggle to be open and honest about your own sexual sin,  see if any of these lies are at the root of your struggle: 1. I’m the only female who struggles with sexual sin and temptation. 2. Sexual sin is supposed to be a “guy issue,” so I must be weird. 3. My family and friends would be shocked if they knew what I struggled with. 4. Everybody views me as the “good Christian girl” soFull Post

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October 30, 2017
Tips for the Clumsy, Awkward, Self-Conscious Christian Girl

It’s happened to the best of us. That moment when something so horribly embarrassing happens and you just want to sink through the floor. I had one of those “sink-through-the-floor-moments” several years back when I was in high school. I was in tenth grade and had just finished competing in a huge basketball tournament. My team had won first place, and we were waiting in line to have our team announced and presented with our big trophy. Honestly, I was feeling pretty good about myself. That was until I experienced one of the most embarrassing moments of my life. Here’s what happened … As we started to make ourFull Post

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October 23, 2017
My Problem: I Was Dressing Modestly for Guys and Not for God

“Sometimes I wonder why I even dress modestly. I mean, guys see immodest women all the time anyway. It’s not like they don’t know what cleavage is. I’m starting to wonder if modesty is really worth it.” Those were the words of a girl who was feeling super discouraged about modesty. As she shared her heart with me, I felt like her words could have been my own. At this point in time (mid-high school) I had some very similar thoughts running through my own mind. Why am I even doing this? Do guys really appreciate the effort that dressing modestly takes? Do they realize how inconvenient modesty canFull Post

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October 18, 2017
How to Mentor a Younger Christian Girl

WATCH VIDEO  Too often we think that discipleship and mentorship is only for “older, more mature women.” That idea simply isn’t true. Older women definitely have tons to offer us, but we as younger women have tons to offer as well. Instead of waiting until we think we’ve “arrived,” let’s choose to make an impact for eternity right now, right where God has us. Let’s create a sisterhood of girls mentoring girls, a community of young women willingly and intentionally pouring out into the young women around us with enthusiasm. Imagine the impact that we could have! Imagine if each one of us reached out to one girl andFull Post

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October 16, 2017
Three Ways to Deal with the Sin of Attention-Seeking

Chords strummed the guitar, a sweet melody flowed from her lips. I couldn’t deny the beauty of it, yet envy burned within me. I wanted to be the one singing, being admired and getting praise. Later, I rested my head on the table as a different voice droned on and on, drowning me in a sea of confusion. I was tired of hearing about this elaborate story they were writing. If only I got to tell people about my writing for a change.Laying on the top bunk that night, I half-wished I would fall and break a leg or something. Then they’d pay me some attention. My conscience toldFull Post

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October 11, 2017
Should Christian Girls Celebrate Halloween?

WATCH VIDEO  We, as Christian girls, need to remember Whom we serve this Halloween day. We need to remember our testimony to a lost and dying culture. We need to remember our call to be in the world but not of the world. We need to be shining lights in a culture of darkness. Your decision on this issue is ultimately one that you have to make for yourself. This is just our personal take. WATCH VIDEO 

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October 9, 2017
50 Questions to Ask Before Falling In Love

You like him. He likes you. The chemistry is jiving. Now what? Where do you go from there? Working through the nitty gritty of a relationship can be exciting and totally confusing at the same time. Figuring out if this guy is someone you want to spend your life with can be really *really* hard.   I’ve been in my fair share of relationships and I understand the confusion and difficulties of the process. Trying to figure out if he’s an option worth getting to know can be a challenge, to say the least. Throughout the years of doing this relationship thing, I’ve consistently fallen back on this oneFull Post

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October 6, 2017
How Pretty is Pretty Enough?

How do you know if Hollywood thinks you’re pretty enough? I mean, beauty is in the eye of the beholder right? Well…apparently there’s a certain group of people who are trying to prove that beauty can actually be measured. They call it the “golden ratio.” The golden ratio is a number (1.62 to be exact) which these groups claim can be used to measure beauty. This number is used to measure everything from how far apart your eyes are, to how long your head is, to how much space you have between your chin and lips. If you measure really well (basically perfect according to this group), your numbersFull Post

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October 4, 2017
How Do I Know if He’s the One I Should Marry?

WATCH VIDEO Have you ever wondered anything like this: “How will I know when I meet my future husband?” Or, “How will I know if he’s the one I should marry?” Or, “What signs should I look for to figure out who the one is?!” These are popular questions. Chances are, you’ve probably asked some of them yourself. Trying to “figure out the ONE” is something we’ve asked ourselves over the years too. In fact, Kristen wrested with this exact question when she first met Zack.  However, instead of looking for a “magic sign” or an overwhelming feeling, we’ve discovered a better way to go about this. We’ve comeFull Post

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October 2, 2017
10 Creative Ways to Live Your Single Years Well

I sat on my bed, the tears flowing. I’d done it again, interacted with a nice guy and wondered if it was “him.” I got home and realized how incredibly ridiculous I had been. I felt like an utter failure at this being “content in the single years” thing. A failure at keeping my focus where it belonged. This could have been true of me two years ago or two months ago. Hello, my name is Moriah, I live in Illinois where it’s sometimes too cold and sometimes too hot. I have a wonderful family, a great church, and delightful friends. There are a lot of things that contributeFull Post

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September 29, 2017
6 Ways to Make Your Journaling More Meaningful

I love journaling. In fact, I started journaling when I was 12 years old and didn’t miss a single day until I got married. That means I journaled for 12 years straight – every single day. I journaled everything and anything. I wrote about my most intimate thoughts, to what I did that day, to who my latest crush was. Shortly after I married Zack, I thought it would be fun to look back through my journals with him and read all of the entries that he was mentioned in. I traced it back to the year 2006, when I first met him as a teenage girl. Reading thoseFull Post

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September 27, 2017
How to Plan, Host, and Lead an Awesome Bible Study

WATCH VIDEO If you have a desire to lead a Bible study then this post will help you overcome the hurdle of uncertainty and equip you with the knowledge and tools you need! Here is our step-by-step Christian Girl’s Guide to Planning, Hosting, and Leading an Awesome Bible Study! There’s no perfect recipe…and things don’t always go as planned…but this simple guide should be enough to help you get started. WATCH VIDEO

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September 25, 2017
How I Overcame Being Shy, Selfish, and Seriously Awkward

I was 15 years old, had a mouth full of braces and was desperately shy and awkward. Our whole family was involved in the AWANA program at our church and I had just started attending the high school program. The first week came and I sat by myself. I walked to game time by myself. I left by myself. The next week, the same thing happened. This went on for several months. I hated going. I hated feeling shy and uncomfortable. I hated not having any friends and feeling desperately alone. After several more weeks, I thought up a “brilliant” plan. Since, there was no getting out of going,Full Post

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September 22, 2017
Should Christian Girls Read Cosmo, Seventeen, and Glamour Magazine?

Earlier this year I noticed a shockingly explicit women’s magazine in the checkout aisle at my grocery store. The cover featured a woman who would have been completely nude, except for a few strategic camera angles and hand placements. I called my grocery store headquarters to talk with the person in charge of the magazine displays. Our phone conversation lasted for over 30 minutes. I asked him questions and heard his answers for why a “family friendly grocery store” publicly displayed such offensive material. At one point during our conversation he actually told me that he finds many of the magazines offensive himself, but doesn’t have the power toFull Post

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September 20, 2017
How to Recover from Being a Desperate Flirt

WATCH VIDEO  As former “desperate flirts” the two of us want to share with you a few truths that we wish we would have embraced earlier on in life. 1. Flirting Never Satisfies Long-term Flirting may be fun in the moment, but it always leads to emptiness and disappointment. Flirting is basically saying “I need attention from guys to feel good about myself.” If you really want to feel long-term satisfaction, you have to turn to the true Source. Only Christ can ultimately satisfy and give you your true identity. 2. Flirting is Selfish Flirting at it’s core is a selfish act. Flirting isn’t about the other person, it’s aboutFull Post

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September 15, 2017
5 Reasons Girls Aren’t Honest About their Sexual Struggles

Being honest about my past struggles with sexual sin and masturbation wasn’t easy. In fact, I didn’t want to be honest about it. I didn’t want to confess it. I wanted to shove those sins into the deepest darkest corner never to be seen again. But I knew that wouldn’t work. Sin always has a way of making its way to the light. As a “good christian girl,” I felt so ashamed and embarrassed inside that I struggled with lust. I was positive that I was the only Christian girl in the entire world who struggled with masturbation. Sexual sins like that were supposed to be guy issues…not girlFull Post

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September 12, 2017
What True Love Really Looks Like

WATCH VIDEO Moments before recording this vlog, the two of us were struggling to love one another. We were on a tight time schedule and the tension was obviously lingering in the air. Instead of embracing and living out true love towards one another, we gave into our sinful hearts. We were impatient, selfish, and struggled to show any sort of humility. If the two of us struggle to show true love toward each other, we’re guessing you struggle to show others, true love, as well. Today’s vlog will dig deep into what true love is and what it is not. WATCH VIDEO

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September 8, 2017
Choosing Feminine Faith in a Feminist World

I was driving down the street the other day listening to one of my favorite Spotify stations (shout out to Vertical Church Band) when my elbow accidentally switched the channel. I didn’t realize it had changed until a random song came on that I had never heard. The woman singing had a beautiful voice. She was extremely talented. But the lyrics were what grabbed my attention. This girl was angry. Hurt. Broken. She had put all of her hopes and dreams in a guy, and he left her for another woman. She was shattered. Her life felt empty. As the catchy beat banged in the background, she was determinedFull Post

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September 6, 2017
6 Misconceptions About Biblical Womanhood

WATCH VIDEO  The words “Biblical Womanhood” can bring up a lot of different thoughts in the mind. In today’s vlog, we are going to debunk six of the most popular misconceptions about biblical womanhood. Our prayer is that these 6 misconceptions about biblical womanhood will open your eyes to the truth and equip you to better share truth with young women and women around you. WATCH VIDEO 

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September 4, 2017
Is Being a Woman about More than Getting Married and Having Babies?

If being a woman is entirely about getting married and having babies, then Kristen and I are failing miserably. I don’t have a husband, which means I don’t have children, and Kristen has a husband but God hasn’t given her children yet. As most of you know I would love to get married and Kristen would love to have children. Despite our deep desires and open hearts toward those roles (being a wife and mother) God has chosen not to fulfill all of those desires in either of our lives. Discovering True Womanhood As a younger girl, I believed that the ultimate fulfillment and climax of my life would comeFull Post

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August 30, 2017
Kristen and Bethany’s Favorite Things

WATCH VIDEO  The two of us thought it would be fun to take a detour from our normal topics and share something a little more personal. We want to show you a few of our favorite things. From nail polish to books, to clothing to cups — here are a few things we use on a weekly (and sometimes daily) basis. You can find all of the links to these favorites in the description on our YouTube channel. WATCH VIDEO 

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August 28, 2017
Bethany’s Journal Entries Following a Difficult Breakup

I didn’t want to be that girl. That girl who sat on her bed sobbing over an ended relationship. I didn’t want to be in that sad/heart-wrenching position, but there I was. Broken hearted and wondering why it had to be me. In the moments that followed my breakup, I didn’t know what to do with myself. I cried my eyeballs out until there were no more tears to cry. My entire head was clogged from the tears and I was just doing my best to breathe. This heart stuff was hard. Harder than I’d imagined it to be. There is just something so extra painful about giving up/moving onFull Post

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August 25, 2017
8 Things I Wish I Knew When I Was a Teen Girl

When you’re young, you feel like you’re going to be young forever. That’s how I felt when I was a teen. I was young, and I couldn’t imagine being any older. Then — in a blink of an eye — I woke up one morning and found myself turning 30. Bam! Now here I am, 30 years old, and still getting over the shock of how fast life flies by. If you’re young right now (in your teens), you probably feel like you’ll be young forever too. Time might even seem to stand still for you. I remember those days. But trust me, they don’t last. You’ll wake upFull Post

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August 23, 2017
How Old Should I Be Before I Start Dating?

WATCH VLOG One of the more common questions that we get from Christian teen girls is, “how old should I be before I start dating?” Maybe you’ve asked this question yourself. The two of us asked this exact question when we hit the teen years as well. With the casual dating scene happening all around us, we questioned whether or not we should jump in. Some of our friends had starting dating, and guys began asking us out. We were interested in guys, but weren’t sure if having a boyfriend was a wise decision at our age. In this Vlog, we’re going to share with you exactly what we didFull Post

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August 21, 2017
Choosing to Surrender Your Dreams and Future to God

I remember three distinct times in my life that I had to surrender my dreams to God. Once at age seventeen, twenty, and twenty-four. When I was seventeen I’d been offered several full basketball scholarships to division one universities. Basketball was my passion and I loved playing (like LOVED playing!). When I wasn’t playing basketball I was either talking about it, thinking about it, or dreaming about it. Basketball was my life. In my junior year of high school, one of the universities I was considering needed an answer from me. They needed my final decision. Long story short, after many (many, many, many) hours of prayer and longFull Post

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August 18, 2017
5 Back-to-School Modesty Hacks for Christian Girls

It happens to me every year. The transition from my summer wardrobe to my fall wardrobe is always a struggle. What worked so well last season just doesn’t seem to be working this season. Styles have changed, my taste had changed, and I honestly just have the desire for something new. Something fresh. And to makes things even harder, striving to dress modestly adds a whole new array of challenges. Are you feeling me here? It’s been a long time since I’ve been in school, but I remember all too well the annual wardrobe challenges. If you’re heading back to high school or college this fall (whether private, public,Full Post

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August 16, 2017
How to Stand Strong Through the College Years

WATCH VLOG It’s HARD being a Christian girl today’s culture. In fact, it’s so hard, that 80% of highly churched teens walk away from their by age 29.  Thankfully, we have hope to succeed because of God’s Grace.  “But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.” (2 Corinthians 12:9). Here are 8 practical strategies to help you stand strong during the college years. 1. Spend Time in the Word Every Day 2. Pray for Strength 3. FindFull Post

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August 14, 2017
5 Questions Girls Should Ask Before Posting a Selfie

I was thirteen years old, loving life, and desperately trying to grab a certain guy’s attention. After a full week at church camp, I was hanging out in the sports court waiting for my parents to pick me up. I knew at any moment my ride would pull into the parking, so I had to act quick. With a knot in my stomach and my eyes on my guy, I made a move. I walked up to Brandon, pulled out my personal wallet sized portrait, and handed it to him. No shame. No regrets. I wanted him to notice me. He, being the somewhat sweet thirteen-year-old boy that heFull Post

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August 11, 2017
4 Verses to Help Christian Girls Conquer Temptation

I’m married to an amazingly godly and kind man. But like any human, Zack might occasionally say something or do something that I don’t view as particularly “sweet and thoughtful.” Instead of giving him the benefit of the doubt, my natural tendency is to assume the worst. Instead of lovingly asking him about it, I often cater to my sinful frustration. This happened recently. I felt the temptation of anger come on me. Instead of resisting it, I allowed my emotions to overtake me. I allowed my feelings to rule my thinking. Once again I found myself giving into temptation. Several hours went by of me pouting and grumbling in myFull Post

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August 9, 2017
3 Popular Places to Misplace Your Identity

WATCH VLOG You will only find your identity in Christ when you stop looking to the culture for answers, and instead allow God’s Word to define your womanhood. Choose to be a Girl Defined by God – not a girl defined by the culture. 3 Popular Places to Misplace Your Identity 1. Outward Appearance THE LIE: Physical Beauty will bring Me Ultimate Happiness and Satisfaction. THE TRUTH: God handcrafted you to look just the way you do. 2. Relationship Status THE LIE: Having a boyfriend will bring me total satisfaction. THE TRUTH: God is the only One who can fully satisfy you. 3. Personal Talents THE LIE: My talentsFull Post

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August 7, 2017
10 Real “Relationship Goals” Everyone Should Have

When “Relationship Goals” first became a thing I thought it was pretty cute. There are images of couples doing really cute, funny things together with the caption “relationship goals”. They are quite popular with everyone it seems. From pictures of couples kissing and holding each other, doing cute poses, to being super awkward and funny together. While the idea is cute and the sentiment is sweet, it’s not what we as godly young girls should be looking to for our advice on how real relationships look. I said that I thought it was cute at first but my mindset quickly changed. First of all, the pictures and ideas thatFull Post

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August 4, 2017
Zack Answers Questions About Romance, Relationships, and Red Flags

I (Kristen) thought it would be fun and helpful to do a Q & A with my husband, Zack. As a guy who loves the Lord and has experienced getting married (and the entire relationship process), he has some insightful wisdom to offer us from a guy’s perspective. Let’s dive in. Question 1: Zack, take us back to when you first met Kristen. What were some of the qualities that attracted you to her? I loved that Kristen was (and still is) passionate and convicted about what she believed. I loved this in her because I really wanted to marry a woman who knew what she believed and wouldn’tFull Post

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August 2, 2017
Why Modern Girls Should Embrace the Lost Art of Hospitality

WATCH VIDEO  Hospitality is so much bigger than just cleaning your house. It’s about loving people and nurturing relationships. Here are 4 reasons why we believe modern girls should still embrace hospitality: 1. Influence for the Gospel 2. Hospitality is Commanded  3. Impact on the Community 4. Order and Peace in a Chaotic World END CHALLENGE: Start small. Invite a girl to coffee. Plan a small game night. Invite a family over for dinner. WATCH VIDEO 

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July 30, 2017
Why Your Singleness Isn’t a Holding Station for Marriage

I’ve spent a good amount of time dreaming about the future. Not dreaming of a future being married to my truest handsome love (although I do dream about that sometimes). What I’m currently dreaming about is something very near to my heart. I’m currently dreaming about the impact that we, as single Christian women, could have on our families, communities, and the world around us. Stop for a moment and dream with me. Imagine what would happen if we, as single women, intentionally viewed these unique single years as “super years” to serve God. Imagine if we viewed them as crucial for service to God, rather than as aFull Post

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July 28, 2017
3 Compelling Reasons to Become a Woman of the Word

I was doing the dishes in my kitchen while listening to a podcast when I heard something that caused me to stop in my tracks. The speaker on the other end of my earbuds was a woman named Jen Wilkin. She was teaching a session on why it’s vitally important for Christian women to know the Bible. The phrase that caused me to halt my dish washing went something like this: “We, as American women may not be illiterate in the normal sense, but we are becoming more and more Bible illiterate with each passing day.” I was instantly struck by that term — “Bible illiterate.” Jen went onFull Post

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July 26, 2017
Reclaiming God’s Design for Love, Marriage, and Sex

WATCH VIDEO  Despite popular belief, God is the original designer of love, marriage, and sex. Those were His idea from the very beginning. Instead of allowing pop culture to define those areas, we need to dig into God’s Word and figure how He defines each of those areas. The two of us are challenging you to make sure that your views on love, marriage, and sex, are coming from the Designer Himself. In today’s vlog, we dig into each of those areas and unpack the bigger picture for love, marriage, and sex. WATCH VIDEO 

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July 24, 2017
Christian Girls Dealing With Dark Seasons and Difficult Circumstances

When we look around at the circumstances of people in the world today, we discover that there is a vast amount of suffering and pain being endured. Many different people struggle with many different types of suffering. Hospitals are full of horrible diseases and injuries, parents are getting divorces, babies are being aborted, war is raging, people are being sold into slavery, drug abuse and alcoholism is affecting more and more people and the list goes ever on and on. People are hurting. Everyone is affected by suffering or pain at one point in their life. Iit may not be physical but everyone goes through tragedy. And when theyFull Post

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July 21, 2017
Choosing to Pursue Radical Purity in Your Own Life

Talking about God’s radical design for love, sex, and purity with 400 girls and women isn’t a normal occurrence in this day and age. But that’s exactly what happened this past weekend at the Radical Purity Conference in San Antonio, TX. We courageously, unashamedly, and tactfully unpacked God’s good plan for our sexuality as women. We talked openly about some of the not-so-often-talked-about areas, and allowed God’s Word to shed light and truth into these relevant topics. We asked the hard questions, and looked into God’s Word for solid answers. We quickly discovered that God’s design for purity is radical. It’s completely counter-cultural. It’s unlike anything you see inFull Post

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July 19, 2017
Why Disagreeing with Someone Shouldn’t Turn Into Hate

WATCH VIDEO  The more our ministry has grown the more hate comments and bullying type comments we’ve received. Bullying and speaking in hateful ways seems to be the new trend.  If you disagree with someone these days, it’s totally acceptable to hate on them. We, as Christian young women, need to learn how to disagree without hating. The two of us want to challenge you to a higher standard. Whether it’s in person, online, with a friend, or towards a stranger, allow these verses to filter your words. Ephesians 4:29-32 (NLT)  “Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will beFull Post

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July 17, 2017
What Christian Girls and Katy Perry Have in Common

This past year my younger sister, Ellissa was a part of a mentoring program at our local public school. She had the privilege of mentoring three little girls that were as sweet and cute as can be. On one of her mentoring days, Ellissa walked through the lunch line and found a spot outside where she and the girls could eat. As they found a spot and began to sit down, the girls excitedly told Ellissa that they wanted to perform a song and dance for her. Within seconds the girls were up and doing their thing. These little girls broke out into the full word-for-word hit song “Roar”Full Post

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July 14, 2017
Radical Purity: Embracing God’s Best in the Midst of a Highly Seductive Culture

The two of us are beyond excited for the Radical Purity Conference happening this weekend in San Antonio, Texas (our hometown). We’re incredibly excited and grateful that God has provided the resources needed for Girl Defined to host this event. Having the opportunity to talk about sex and purity from a biblical perspective is something I’m thrilled to do. (Here’s a peek at our promo video.) Even if you don’t plan to join us at the conference, I want you to know that you are not alone. You are not alone in your struggles to understand sexuality and stay pure. God isn’t surprised or shocked by what you’ve doneFull Post

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July 12, 2017
Be a Girl Who Lives with Vision, Passion, and Purpose

When Kristen and I launched our very first blog (long before GirlDefined existed) we didn’t have a very clear plan of what we were doing. Due to our serious lack of vision for the blog, it didn’t take long for our interests to diminish. Let’s just say that our original blog didn’t last very long. Through that experience, the two of us realized our serious need for vision, passion, and purpose. Once the two of us established our vision for GirlDefined, that drove our passion, which in turn fueled our purpose on a daily basis. We want to challenge you to be a girl who lives with a visionFull Post

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July 10, 2017
Becoming Women Who Understand The Power of Worship

The past few months of my life feel like they’ve been filled with a certain 7 letter word. This word flies in the face of my natural heart’s desire and is the opposite of everything the culture promotes. This word has challenged me, convicted me, encouraged me and given me incredible hope. When I focus on living this word out, I have such incredible rest, contentment, and joy in my heart. I want to share this word with you in hopes that you can find the same hope, conviction, contentment, and joy that I’ve found by striving to live it out. The word is WORSHIP. The word worship holdsFull Post

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July 7, 2017
Is it Wrong for Christian Couples to Live Together Before Marriage?

We were desperately in love. He wanted to marry me and I wanted to be his wife. He popped the question while the sun was setting one cool October night. I immediately said yes and from that moment on we viewed one another as our soon-to-be-spouses. Love was in the air. We began planning and prepping for our future life together. We talked budgets, apartments, registries, bathroom towel colors, and everything in between. The wedding was only eight months away. Wouldn’t it make sense for us to move in together now? Why not get ahead of the game by combining our living spaces early? Shouldn’t we give marriage a testFull Post

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July 5, 2017
How to Overcome Your Beauty Insecurities

WATCH VIDEO  After searching for answers ourselves, the two of us discovered a version of beauty that offers lasting worth and hope in this area. This video will equip you with answers, practical tools, and biblical truth to help every young woman who has ever wondered, “am I pretty enough?” In this vlog, Kristen and Bethany unpack three powerful truths that helped them overcome their beauty struggles. Three powerful truths for getting to the heart:  1. God handcrafted you to look just the way you do. 2. God created you to glorify and serve Him with the body He gave you. 3. I was created for God’s glory. WATCHFull Post

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July 3, 2017
The Greatest Calling of a Modern Christian Girl

I was in my early twenties and nannying part time. It was a school day, which meant waiting at the bus stop to pick up kids. As  I was heading towards the bus stop, I noticed a young woman waiting at the bus stop as well. I didn’t recognize her and figured she must be new. Being the extroverted and outgoing girl that I am, I quickly introduced myself. Sara shared with me that she had just arrived in Texas, coming from Europe, and would be nannying directly across the street from me. Knowing that Sara was new to town (and had zero friends) I decided to reach out toFull Post

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June 30, 2017
How Modesty Taught Me to Value My Body More, Not Less

When I was 21 years old, I signed a one year contract with a modeling agency. After that one year was up, I walked away from the industry and never looked back. Even though my experience was brief, I got a good taste for what it felt like to be objectified for a profit. In my book, Girl Defined, I talk about how the modeling industry along with countless other industries have re-trained our society to view the female body as a consumable object. TV shows like Girls Gone Wild, companies like Playboy, restaurants like Hooters and magazines like Cosmo have completely destroyed America’s view of women. Teen girlsFull Post

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June 28, 2017
The Number One Thing Single Girls Should Look for in a Future Husband (But Rarely Do)

WATCH VLOG Most single girls have a running list of the things they’re hoping for in a future husband. The list often looks something like this: Handsome Athletic Smart Funny Good with people Social Loves to have fun Makes me smile And….oh — is a Christian Goes to Church (at least most of the time) As important as a “handsome face” and “funny personality” may seem to a girl before marriage, these things often take a back seat to something else that becomes MUCH more important. Most Christian married women say that a handsome face and fun personality aren’t the most important things they want in their husband. InFull Post

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June 26, 2017
How to Discover if He’s The One You Should Marry

My boyfriend and I had been pursuing an intentional relationship for quite some time. He was ready to move forward into engagement. I wasn’t so sure. I wanted to make sure I was making the right decision. I’d been in the relationship long enough to have all of the facts in hand. I knew the ins and outs of his personality. I knew his strengths. I knew his weaknesses. I knew his likes and dislikes. I knew his convictions. There was only one thing left for me to figure out. I needed to decide if I wanted to commit to spending the rest of my life with him. QuestionsFull Post

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June 21, 2017
Answering Your Questions About Infatuation, Modesty, and the Future

WATCH VLOG Infatuation, Modesty and The Future are popular topics amongst modern women. How do I avoid becoming obsessed with a guy? How to let go of a guy after I’ve already ended the relationship? Does dressing modestly mean I’m ashamed of my body? How can I remain faithful to God when I don’t know what the future holds? I have a passion to invest in younger women, but I’m not sure where to start? Any ideas? Kristen and Bethany tackle these questions and more. WATCH VLOG

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June 19, 2017
When Posting Hot Selfies Gets You More Attention

I was thirteen years old and heading in for my first experience with the well-known photography company Glamour Shots. My mom and I were on a special girls trip to Dallas, Texas to celebrate my birthday. Getting my hair highlighted, nails manicured, and glamorous pictures taken was a must for this girly girl. I loved every minute of the Glamour Shot experience. The makeup. The hair. The clothes. The attention. The compliments. I felt beautiful and accepted. After the photo shoot, I looked through the pictures and picked out a few of my favorites. We ordered a package and then left the store to continue on our trip. WhenFull Post

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June 16, 2017
Why I Chose to Save Sex for Marriage

If there’s one thing that will quickly raises eyebrows of curiosity, it’s when I tell people that my husband and I were both virgins on our wedding day. As normal as that seemed to me back when I got married, I’m becoming more aware of how radically counter-cultural this is in today’s society. When people hear that I intentionally and purposely chose to save sex for marriage, their next question is almost always, “why?” Why would I put myself through that? Why would I force myself to wait on something that is so amazing? Why would I deny myself the fun and pleasure that so many other single girlsFull Post

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June 14, 2017
How to Handle a Breakup in a God Honoring Way

WATCH VLOG For those of you who have been through a heartbreak, we can understand. We’ve each been through difficult and extremely painful breakups. If you are willing to follow God, trust in His perfect plan, cling to His Word, pour out your heart to Him, He can use your heartbreak for good as well. In today’s vlog, we share five truths to help you handle your breakup in a God-honoring way. 1. Seek Comfort in the Right Places. 2. Trust in the Lord with all your heart. 3. Surround yourself with godly wisdom. 4. Fill your mind with truth. 5. Choose to Serve Others.   WATCH VLOG

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June 12, 2017
Why Christian Girls Need to Rethink the Flirting Game

I was in sixth grade and knew exactly how to work it. Every girl at church camp liked the same guy and I was determined to get his attention. He was cute. He was popular. I wanted nothing less than for him to like me. I wasn’t interested in a relationship or anything serious (I was only 12 years old) I just liked the way I felt when I captured his attention. I remember the situation like it was yesterday. We were playing knockout (a basketball game) on the camp sports court. I made my shot and then went to lure my prey. I ran over towards him withFull Post

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June 9, 2017
Modern Female Heroes Needed for Battle

The guard slapped her across the face and yelled, “keep moving!” Her tiny frame and malnourished figure stumbled forward. On the brinks of starvation and freezing to death, she was doing everything possible to simply survive. Ripped away from her family and friends, she had nothing left but her faith. The days and months wore on as Corrie Ten Boom endured the horrendous evil inside a Nazi concentration camp. She was in the midst of a monstrous battle. As the days and weeks wore on, she watched her precious sister die from sickness. Fighting the rage of anger inside her heart, Corrie knew that there was only one weaponFull Post

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June 6, 2017
Practical Tips for Embracing Purity in a Romantic Relationship

WATCH VLOG Maintaining purity in a romantic relationship is not an easy thing to do. John and Elizabeth are a newly married couple and remember the early days of their relationship very clearly. They offer practical advice on how to honor God in this area of a relationship. If you are in a relationship, want to be in a relationship, or plan to be one day in the future, this will prepare you to honor God and maintain purity. WATCH VLOG

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June 5, 2017
10 Ideas to Help You Combine Fashion and Modesty

The moment summer hits is the moment modesty seems to go out the window. Shorts shrink into underwear size. Shirts are so small they don’t even cover the mid drift. Clothes are sheer and basically see through. It often feels like being trendy and fashionable means wearing close to nothing. Despite how popular the itty-bitty clothing trend seems to be, we don’t have to accept it. We can rise to a more decent and respectable standard. Just because underwear size shorts are “in,” doesn’t mean we have to wear them and let our cheeks hang out. Just because teeny-tiny-cleavage-revealing-belly-button-displaying shirts are “in,” doesn’t mean we have to wear them.Full Post

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June 2, 2017
3 Truths for Building a Future Marriage that Lasts

They were young and in love. Their entire future was ahead of them. Everything seemed magical in their lives and he couldn’t wait to propose to her. He began ring shopping with great excitement and imagined the moment he would slip the diamond onto her finger. Suddenly, without any warning, something drastic changed their lives forever. It was a normal day for this young couple just like any other day. He headed to his car without a clue that this would be the last day he would walk or talk for a very long time. He merged onto the highway like he always did, but this time things wouldn’tFull Post

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May 31, 2017
7 Habits of a Strong and Courageous Girl

WATCH VLOG It’s time we, as Christian girls, got a little fire in our bones for the things that truly matter. The things that matter to God. We serve a mighty King who is passionate about things like truth, life, marriage, purity, holiness, womanhood, manhood, and much more. With attitudes of reverence, respect, dignity, and submission to our God, we should be on the front lines fighting for His agenda. The two of us would LOVE to see thousands of strong and courageous Christian girls rise up from your generation. Our culture is in desperate need of godly girls with passion and fire for God’s truth. WATCH VLOG

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May 29, 2017
Guy Answers Questions on Purity, Marriage, Makeup and More

It seems like every girl has questions in the back of her mind that she just wishes she could ask a godly guy. Questions that would give her as close to a “guy’s perspective on life” as she could get. We are so glad to inform you that this post is exactly that! We had the opportunity to have three young ladies brainstorm and come up with a few questions that they would ask a guy, if given the opportunity. Their questions are in bold below. We took those questions and sent them on over to a godly guy and had him answer the questions from his perspective. WeFull Post

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May 24, 2017
The Difference Between a Wild and a Wise Woman

WATCH VIDEO  The Bible makes it pretty clear that there are two very different types of women in the world. There are wild women and there are wise women. Sadly, our culture upholds the wild woman and encourages us to be like her. The Bible makes it very clear that we should be wise though. Not wild. Today’s vlog will show the differences between the two women. You will be encouraged to become like the wise woman we see in Proverbs 31. WATCH VIDEO 

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May 22, 2017
Christian Girls Need to Start Talking about God Defined Sexuality

A few months ago, Kristen and I began praying about a theme for our upcoming summer conference. We talked, prayed, talked some more and still came up empty handed. We wanted to host a conference that would meet the greatest needs of the girls who would attend…we just weren’t sure what that was. The two of us agreed that we didn’t want to settle on a topic just because it seemed interesting or exciting. We wanted a topic that would genuinely help and challenge the girls attending. After hours of thinking, we decided to give the brainstorming a break. A few weeks went by and then we met backFull Post

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May 19, 2017
Choosing Modesty and Dignity over Sexual Compromise

From the time I was a little girl I’ve had random people approach me and ask if I did any modeling. I had never thought of myself as a model, but all of their questions made me curious. As I grew older my curiosity for the modeling industry grew stronger. I was raised in a strong Christian home and both of my parents knew the dangers of the modeling industry. When I grew a little older I finally convinced them to let me try a “family friendly” modeling agency. I got the job immediately and signed a one year contract. Things seemed to be going well at first andFull Post

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May 17, 2017
How We Got Our Very First Book Published

WATCH VIDEO  Our dream of becoming authors seemed too big to ever become a reality. We were working hard, but we knew it would take a miracle from Heaven to make this dream a reality. Fast forward to today and we are celebrating the one year anniversary of Girl Defined hitting the bookstores. One year ago, for the very first time, Kristen and I held our brand new book in our hands. Shock, awe, amazement, gratitude, unbelief, excitement, joy, and pure delight are just a few of the feelings we felt when we opened that exciting package. Here is our story of how we became published authors. GET THEFull Post

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May 10, 2017
Choosing to Take Modesty Into Your Summer Swimwear

WATCH VIDEO  As Christian girls, it’s our responsibility to pull our lost culture toward God’s Word, not away from it. It is our obligation to raise the moral bar, not lower it. It is our duty to lead our culture towards modesty and decency, not away from it. It is our privilege to showcase the purity and holiness of Christ, rather than the nudity of our culture. As Ephesians 5:1,8, and 10 says, “Therefore, be imitators of God, as beloved children…for at one time, you were in darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Walk as children of light…and try to discern what is pleasing to theFull Post

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May 8, 2017
Give the Guy a Chance to be a Gentleman

I was a sophomore in high school and had just finished playing in the semi-finals for a big basketball tournament. As my team and I were sitting in the bleachers scouting out our competition, one of the high school guys teams came and sat right behind us. It just so happened that these guys went on to introduce themselves and quickly struck up a conversation. As our conversation with these guys gained speed, my ears quickly tuned into their major language problem. Their English was fine, but their choice of words was filled with profanity and inappropriate comments. Being the outgoing girl on my team, I turned around and lookedFull Post

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May 5, 2017
3 Truths for Becoming a Seriously Godly Woman

A few summers ago I hosted a simulcast conference at my church. The simulcast was put on by Leslie Ludy over at Set Apart Girl Ministries. As she was speaking she mentioned this idea of “becoming one of the few.” She said that in every generation there are only a few girls willing to give up their lives for Christ. There are only a few girls who are willing to give up the world’s ideas and follow the Bible’s. There are only a few girls willing to give up their life plans in exchange for Christ’s plan. Leslie then asked us if we wanted to be one of theFull Post

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May 3, 2017
Why A Husband Isn’t Your Reward for Staying Pure

WATCH VLOG  I’ve heard several girls express similar complaints over the past few months. They sound something like this… “I did everything right. I haven’t had sex. I didn’t date around. I tried to honor God. So what gives? Why didn’t God give me a husband?”  In today’s Vlog, I want to take you through 3 different truths to help you answer that questions. Here are 3 truths to help you gain a Biblical approach to purity:  1. God never guarantees you a husband. Getting married and having a husband is an awesome thing, but it’s not a guarantee. We need to make sure that we don’t add to ScriptureFull Post

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May 1, 2017
Why Purity Begins In the Heart {FREE GIVEAWAY}

Every­ Christian has something to say about purity, be it right or wrong, loose or conservative, broad or specific. Purity is a vital element of our walk with God—and one, it seems, that many are missing. Christian girls are pros at talking the talk and getting on mission trip and youth conference “highs for Jesus,” but when it comes down to making right choices, standing blameless before God, and keeping pure, humble, and full of the fear of the Lord—there’s a discon­nect. Purity is not a ring, a book, or even a commitment, though all of those can be good things! But without actively maintaining our whole selves accordingFull Post

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April 26, 2017
3 Reasons You Should Lead a Bible Study this Summer

WATCH VIDEO  Leading a Bible study is an incredible way to invest into those around you. Whether you’ve done it before, or it’s your very first time, we believe this summer could be life changing for you and the girls you invite. When you step up to lead a Bible study, you have to prepare in ways you don’t if you are just an attendee. You have to plan, organize, study, prep, run the discussion time, answer questions, and lead prayer. It really forces you to dig deeply into God’s Word. WATCH VIDEO 

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April 21, 2017
Ditching the Demeaning Mindset that “Girls Rule and Boys Drool”

I used to love beating guys at basketball. Well…I actually loved beating guys at anything. Back in high school, there were two guys who challenged Bethany and me to a game of two-on-two basketball. Ummm. Yes. We were totally up for the challenge. You could smell their pride as we stepped onto the court. This was going to be fun. Lets just say the game didn’t last long. We beat them twenty-one to zip. Bethany and I walked off the court openly smirking. In our minds, we were the bomb. For us, beating guys in basketball was the ultimate “girls are better than boys” proclamation. Back then, my attitude towardsFull Post

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April 19, 2017
6 Things Every Christian Girl Needs to Know Before Getting Married

WATCH VIDEO  The first six months of my marriage were some of the most eye opening months of my life. Prior to getting marriage, I thought being a wife was easy business. I mean…seriously — how hard could it be? As I approached my wedding day, I naively thought I was fully prepared in every way. Reality check! After six months of marriage I realized how utterly unprepared I truly was in certain areas. If I could go back in time, I would definitely give my “single self” some major advice. Looking back now, after 6 years of marriage, there are some specific things I wish I had worked harderFull Post

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April 17, 2017
Becoming a Woman Who Genuinely Loves to Pray

I walked out to the front of the church parking lot, found a nice bench to sit on, and opened up my Bible to the book of Psalms. This is going to be a long ten minutes, I thought to myself. I was attending a conference on prayer, and the speaker challenged us to be alone for ten minutes to pray. He challenged us to use a certain passage from the book of Psalms to guide our prayers, encouraging us that praying through Scripture was an incredible way to deepen and enhance our prayer lives. I wasn’t so sure. I was convinced that reading through Scripture for ten straight minutes wouldFull Post

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April 14, 2017
Jesus Died So We Could Be Freed from Our Secret Sins

After months of pure misery, Natasha couldn’t keep the secrets to herself any longer. They were tearing her life apart piece by piece. Every secret she kept only made it harder for her to reveal what was really going on in her life. Natasha was a friend of mine. She called me one night on the phone and couldn’t hold back the tears as she shared what had been going on. She had been secretly watching online porn and engaging in sexual conversations with several different guys. She was so ashamed and embarrassed. She could barely speak the words. “I just need to tell someone! I don’t want to live like thisFull Post

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April 12, 2017
How Christian Girls Can Do Prom in a Pure and Modest Way

WATCH VIDEO  Prom is a really big deal right now. It seems like everyone is talking about it. The pressure to go and look drop-dead-gorgeous is intense. The two of us encourage you to stop and consider a few important things before going to prom. Don’t attend prom just because it’s the normal, cool, fun thing to do. Make honoring Christ your biggest priority when it comes to your choice to attend or not to attend. Here are five things to consider before saying “yes” to prom. WATCH VIDEO 

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April 10, 2017
How to Create a Sisterhood of Girls Mentoring Girls

I sat in the conference session with my eyes wide open. It was one of those moments where every word spoken pierced straight into my heart. As the speaker shared about his passion for mentorship and discipleship, I knew my life would never be the same. After that conference, my life took a drastic turn for the better. I went from having head knowledge about the importance of discipleship to having a heart and passion for it. I was turning into a girl who deeply desired to reach out and minister to the young women in my sphere of influence. It was like I was beginning to see withFull Post

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April 7, 2017
How to Go From Singleness to Marriage in a God-Honoring Way

I clearly remember the day that I went from being “single” to being in a relationship with Zack. It was so exciting, exhilarating, and strange all at the same time. All of a sudden I had this amazing guy in my life. He wanted to get to know me. I wanted to get to know him. Neither of us knew if our relationship would result in marriage, but we were anxious to find out. After ten long months of intentionally getting to know one another, seeking wisdom, and praying a lot, it became very clear that marriage was the next step for us. Eeeek! We were giddy with excitement!Full Post

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April 5, 2017
Answering Your Questions About Beauty, Romance, and The Christian Life

WATCH VLOG Beauty, Romance, and The Christian Life are popular topics amongst modern women. What if a guy is pressuring me to change myself? How do I know if a guy likes me? What do I do when I feel like God has turned His back on me? What are the dangers in fantasizing? How can I minister as a single girl? How can I be patient in my relationship? Kristen and Bethany tackle these questions and more in today’s vlog. WATCH VLOG

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March 31, 2017
How to Never Feel Like the Ugly Girl Again

I was driving down the road the other day and saw a billboard with an advertisement for a cosmetic surgery office which featured a seductively dressed model and the statement, “Enhance your beauty.” The message was loud and clear: If you want to be beautiful you will need a large chest, plump lips, luscious hair, a skinny waist, and long eyelashes. If you’re a woman alive right now you know exactly what I’m talking about. You’ve seen the commercials, the ads, the music videos, the billboards, and the magazines like I have. You’ve stared into the mirror when nobody else was watching and wished you were a lot prettier.Full Post

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March 29, 2017
Should Christian Girls Date Non-Christian Guys?

WATCH VLOG The question of whether a Christian should date a non-Christian has been circulating for centuries. Here are a few common questions we’ve received on this topic: “What’s the harm in dating a non-Christian guy?” “What if he’s a highly moral guy, but he’s not a Christian. Is dating okay?” “We love each other and love is bigger than religion, right?” Check out today’s Vlog for five really helpful truths to help you decide if dating a non-Christian is a wise idea. WATCH VLOG

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March 27, 2017
How a Conference on Sex Helped Me in My Singleness

This past weekend I went to a women’s conference at my church. The topic? Sex. Yes, I know I’m single. I know it’s a little weird that I went to a conference talking about something only married women should be doing. I know you’re probably wondering how in the world a conference on sex helped me in my singleness. Although the conference was on sex (something I’ve never done and don’t plan do until I’m married) it was honestly amazing. I wish each and every one of you could have been there with me. The sessions were incredibly tasteful, biblically based, and super practical. Dr. Juli Slattery was soFull Post

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March 24, 2017
Why Becoming Famous and Hot Shouldn’t be Our Goal

She was a nobody. Outside of her small circle of friends, the world didn’t even know she existed. As a music lover, she would sing songs in her room late into the night. She dreamed of becoming a famous singer. But as it was, Nashville didn’t even know she existed. Then one day, everything changed. She decided to post a few of her videos on Youtube. Little did she know what would happen next. She knew her voice was pretty good…but she had no idea how much talent she truly possessed. Within 24 hours her videos went viral. After 10 million views, she got a call from a majorFull Post

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March 22, 2017
5 Verses on Purity That Every Girl Needs to Know

WATCH VIDEO  Staying pure in our culture, at times, can seem nearly impossible. Simple things like getting on Pinterest, Instagram, Snapchat or Facebook can feel like a danger zone. Just walking through the grocery store checkout line can feel slightly scarring at times. Impurity and immorality are very real things that we as Christian girls need to be equipped to fight against. The next time you are tempted to look at, think about or participate in something that you know will not honor God, pull out these 5 verses. They will be your spiritual ammo in your fight for purity. WATCH VIDEO 

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March 19, 2017
Modern Girls Should Still Practice Hospitality

All my life, my family has welcomed people into our home on a regular basis. From Bible studies and dinners to parties and overnight guests, my family has valued hospitality. I’ve watched (and helped) my mother cook giant meals and clean our house in preparation for guests. My sisters and I have set countless tables and sampled many desserts before people have come to our home. All throughout this, I’ve noticed that, in today’s culture, hospitality tends to be shoved under a rug. We like the idea of Pinterest perfect parties and afternoons that come out of the pages of a magazine, but in reality, not everyone wants toFull Post

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March 17, 2017
Beauty and the Beast: What Else Did We Expect?

I was sitting outside working on a writing project when I first got the news. A text message popped up on my phone from Zack that said, “Check out this article, babe.” I clicked the link and it took me to an article titled, “Beauty and the Beast to feature first ‘exclusively gay moment’ in a Disney movie.” My first thought was, “Oh no. You’ve got to be kidding me!” But then my next thought was, “What else would I expect?” Since that moment, I’ve read dozens of comments from all sorts of Christians regarding this movie. “How could Disney put a gay scene in a children’s movie!?” “WhyFull Post

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March 15, 2017
How to Use the Bible to Answer Tough Questions

WATCH VLOG We as modern girls have a lot of tough questions. What is true love?  What makes a real marriage?  Where will I go when I die?  Where did I come from? The list goes on. Unless we know how to use God’s Word to answer our tough questions, we will get swept up with the most popular opinion. We as modern girls desperately need to know how to use the Bible to answer our relevant questions. WATCH VLOG

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March 13, 2017
Rethinking Hollywood’s Bogus Version of Love and Romance

I pulled into the coffee shop parking lot and headed inside to quickly order my latte. Early mornings and I do not go well together. After a few sips of coffee, my brain slowly started creeping towards a somewhat functioning mode. Why I decided to lead an early morning Bible study…I’m not sure. I guess I assumed the girls I invited wouldn’t want to get up that early. Wrong assumption! They loved the idea. With perky little smiles and energy beyond my understanding, the girls slowly started trickling in and gathering around for our weekly girl talk and Bible time. The girls and I were having great conversations whenFull Post

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March 10, 2017
4 Reasons Modesty Empowers Women and Nudity Doesn’t

After posing half naked in a recent photo shoot, Emma Watson (the star in the upcoming Beauty and the Beast movie) couldn’t understand why people were calling her a hypocrite. As an outspoken self-proclaimed feminist, some people viewed Emma’s photoshoot as quite the contradiction. They were wondering how a woman could stand for “women’s equality and female respect,” while at the same time taking part in the sexual objectification of women. In response to the pushback that Emma Watson received for posing half naked, Gloria Steinem (a famous liberal feminist) rushed to her side in defense. Gloria Steinem unashamedly told the media, “Feminist can wear whatever the *** they want. They should be ableFull Post

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March 8, 2017
How to Think Clearly When You’re Totally Infatuated

WATCH VIDEO  I (Bethany) clearly remember a time in my life when I was totally infatuated with a guy. In my mind, this guy could do no wrong. He was like a modern day William Wallace. After a good two years, the fog lifted and I was finally able to see clearly. It was in those moments of clarity that I finally realized I had been infatuated. I had basically ignored all the wisdom and advice around me because I was so head-over-heals for this guy. My feelings were driving my brain and I wasn’t going to let anything stop me. Infatuation has a way of creeping up onFull Post

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March 6, 2017
How to Spot and Get Rid of Idols in Your Life

Ashley had grown to dread hanging out with her friends. She hated the thoughts that flooded her mind every time she met up with them. What if they don’t like my hair? What if they think my outfit looks stupid? What if they don’t get my jokes? On and on the thoughts continued. Ashley tried her best to curl her hair perfectly, paint her nails just right and wear the cutest outfits, but nothing seemed to work. Ashley’s desperate desire to be completely loved and accepted by her friends was turning her into a sad and depressed young lady. Ashley thought that if she could only gain the constantFull Post

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March 3, 2017
Emma’s Story: Opening Up About Past Sin Changed Her Life

I leaned my weight against the bathroom sink trying not to throw up. My heart was thumping so loud that my scarf was thumping up and down. I was doing all I could to keep from crying. My heart kept pounding. It felt like someone had stuck a wooden spoon inside my stomach and was stirring my insides around. I took a deep breath. Looking in the mirror, I told myself I didn’t want to do this. I had been on this mission trip for a month. I had heard each of my teammates admit to sin in their pasts when they gave their personal testimonies. But it wasFull Post

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March 1, 2017
Answering Your Questions About God, Guys, and Purity

WATCH VIDEO  God, guys, and purity are popular topics amongst modern single women. How do I study my Bible? How do I talk to other people about God? How do I remain pure before marriage? What do I do with attention from a non-believing guy? Questions like these are regulars in our email inbox. It can be so hard to know how to answer these questions and practically live out biblical truth. In today’s vlog, we tackle these questions and do our best to give you down-to-earth biblical answers. WATCH VIDEO 

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February 26, 2017
Finding Freedom from Your Addiction to Porn

I recently read about a girl who was strolling through a local grocery store, when she felt a sudden and overwhelming urge for a chocolate candy bar. The urge became so powerful that she forgot what she was doing and headed straight for the candy aisle. She searched the options wondering which one she should choose. She spotted one she had never seen before. The label pulled at her desire with words like “Great new taste!” “Satisfaction guaranteed!” “No more hunger cravings!” The girl grabbed the candy bar and started savoring the first bite. Her entire being was enraptured in the moment. She loved the way the candy made her feel.Full Post

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February 22, 2017
How to Be Single and Satisfied at the Same Time

WATCH VIDEO  Bethany understands what it’s like to have an unmet desire. As a single girl herself, she says there are only two ways to handle your desire for marriage. Will you choose the road towards sorrow or satisfaction? Bethany’s learned that living in a state of, “I must have marriage” is awful. She’s decided to instead trust the Lord with her heart and desires. She challenges you to do the same. WATCH VIDEO 

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February 17, 2017
The Feminist Attack on God’s Design for Womanhood

“Feminism is a movement for all women!” I’ve heard this statement hundreds of times. I’ve received dozens of emails and comments from Christian girls stating similar things. But is it? Is modern feminism truly a movement for all women? Because if it is, I sure don’t feel included. All of those women who were rejected from the “Women’s March” for being pro-life didn’t feel included either. Regardless of how sweetly feminism is defined in the dictionary, the reality of what it is today tells us all that we need to know. Modern feminism is a direct attack on God’s design for womanhood. Disagree? Jump back in time with meFull Post

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February 15, 2017
5 Habits of a Wimpy Girl

WATCH VLOG The truth is, it takes a much stronger woman to stand up against sin than it does to give in to sin. The Bible calls us to have backbones of steel and hearts of fire that fight for His truth and wage war against sin. Our culture needs to see more of that version of a strong girl. Would you consider yourself a strong girl according to the culture or a strong girl according to the Bible? Check out these 5 habits of a weak and wimpy girl and see how you measure up. WATCH VLOG

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February 13, 2017
How to Handle Your Desire for a Boyfriend

Annie was twenty-two going on twenty-three, boyfriend-less and struggling to trust in God. She lived in a small town, worked at a small business and went to a small church. Let’s just say the male prospects (or lack of) in town were small as well. The longing in Annie’s heart to finally meet and marry the man of her dreams was becoming overbearing. How could she possibly remain content in life when true love was nowhere on the horizon? Although Annie’s heart longed for a guy, she made the tough decision to give her desires to God and wait patiently on His timing. Annie’s relationship status didn’t change rightFull Post

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February 8, 2017
How to Survive Being Single on Valentine’s Day

WATCH VIDEO  Valentine’s Day often brings a lot of different thoughts and emotions for single girls. With romance floating in the air and stores bursting with dark chocolate and roses, it can be hard not to get down and discouraged. Instead of falling into a “woe is me” mindset, the two of us want to show you how to survive and thrive this special day. WATCH VIDEO 

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February 6, 2017
Let’s Be Women Who Chase Down Truth

The conversation was heated. The room was tense. The looks on my girl friends faces were anything but peaceful. After all of the years of friendship, we had finally hit the landmine. Someone mentioned a specific doctrinal belief and the room exploded. Half the girls believed one opinion and half believed the other. Despite the dramatic pleas from each side to “see the light” we had to call it truce.  No one was budging. When I arrived home that evening, I shared my afternoon’s happenings with my parents. Instead of my parents just saying to me, their young 14-year-old daughter, “this is what you should believe,” they taught meFull Post

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February 3, 2017
La La Land: A Conflicting Message for Christian Girls

With every new chick flick that is advertised, untold numbers run to the nearest movie theater with their significant other in hopes that this will be the next cult classic. “This will be the movie that makes my boyfriend realize how lucky he is to be going out with me!” “This will be the movie that makes me cry and causes me to shamelessly fantasize myself as the lead actress.” La La Land was supposed to be this movie. Critics built this movie up to be the biggest blockbuster of the year. Awards so far include Golden Globe Award Winner for Best Motion Picture, Best Actress, Best Actor, BestFull Post

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February 1, 2017
Don’t Believe the Lies of Counterfeit Womanhood

WATCH VIDEO We are seeing a lot of different women standing for a lot of different things. As Christian women, we have to decide which camp we choose to be in. Will you be a woman who follows the latest trends defining womanhood? Will you be a woman who picks and chooses from God’s Word? Will you be a woman who allows the Bible to completely inform her worldview on femininity? Without a clear understanding of God-defined femininity, it’s impossible not to be swept up with the popular flow. WATCH VIDEO

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January 30, 2017
We Need to Stop Destroying Godly Leadership in Guys

The conference had just begun as I settled into my chair with my warm cup of coffee in hand. I was excited to take a break from the normal routine of life and instead spend the weekend resting and recharging. About ten minutes into the opening session, I noticed a cute young married couple come through the doors. They looked no older than mid-twenties, so I’m guessing they had to be a newly(ish) married couple. What happened next totally took me off guard. As the husband walked in and gestured towards a row for the two of them to sit in, the wife looked at him with a lookFull Post

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January 27, 2017
Why I Chose Not to Walk in the Women’s March

As much as I absolutely love being a woman, I was honestly shocked, saddened, and appalled by the Women’s March this past Saturday. This March, and all that was represented by it, was a sobering picture of what happens to womanhood when God is removed from the picture. Without God’s truth guiding our lives, womanhood becomes nothing more than a distorted, convoluted, nonsensical mess. Apart from God, we as women, quickly lose all sense of decency and propriety. We shout profanities in the streets, dress in explicit costumes, bash males, disrespect leaders, insist on free birth control, and of course demand the right to murder our babies without exception.Full Post

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January 25, 2017
Why Christian Girls Should Be Beautiful but Not Seductive VLOG

WATCH VIDEO  Christian girls are never called by God to be seductresses. Never. But they are called to be beautiful women of God. According to God’s Word, beauty and seduction are two totally different things. Our outward beauty as Christian girls should never be used to purposely distract, seduce, entice, lure in, or arouse the people around us. Our beauty should never be used selfishly and without thought to how our actions are affecting others. Our most intimate body parts shouldn’t be thrown around like cheap disposable objects, but rather saved and cherished because we’re pure daughters of a Holy King. Instead of following after our culture’s self-focused definitionFull Post

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January 23, 2017
Falling in Love With Guys That You Don’t Even Know

It was a sunny Friday afternoon, and I had just finished attending a writing conference with a girlfriend of mine. I walked to the parking garage and hopped in my truck. Yikes! The parking garage had been empty when I pulled in early that morning, but it had completely filled up throughout the day. Getting out of a parking garage in a big Texas truck is nearly impossible. As I slowly started to inch my way out, I noticed the driver in the car waiting to take my parking spot was a very attractive looking guy. He had a big smile on his face as he watched me slowlyFull Post

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January 18, 2017
4 Practical Tips for Overcoming Your Beauty Struggles

WATCH VIDEO If you girls are anything like the two of us, you’ve probably struggled with your outward appearance. It’s hard not to struggle when we live in a world that is OBSESSED with physical perfection. Despite the obsession with perfection, we as women do not have to buy into the lie. We can have freedom in this area. We’ve truly come to embrace the body God has given each of us and we would love for you to have the same! Here are a few practical tips that really helped the two of us break free from our beauty struggles. WATCH VIDEO

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January 13, 2017
Why Staying Pure for Marriage Shouldn’t Be the Goal

Saving my first kiss for my wedding day was a dream I had since I was young. As a 13 year old girl I remember hearing an older girl (she seemed ancient to me at the time, but was probably only 21) share how she was saving her first kiss for marriage. I remember being so inspired by her ambitious goal that I decided, on the spot, to save my first kiss too. I loved the idea! As the years went on and my “cute boy radar” grew stronger, I constantly remembered my commitment. No kissing boys. As I learned more about purity and God’s calling for me toFull Post

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January 11, 2017
Bethany Answers Personal Questions About Thriving as a Single Girl

WATCH VIDEO  Bethany opens up and answers personal questions about guys, relationships, and being single. As a twenty-eight-year-old single girl, Bethany can relate to the struggles, sorrows, and difficulties that accompany those extra unwanted single years. Although she doesn’t claim to have lived these years out perfectly, she’s learned a few things that have been extremely beneficial to her and she wants to share them with you. WATCH VIDEO 

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January 8, 2017
Learning to Trust God When the Situation Seems Impossible

Let’s fly back in time to October of 2014. I remember it like it was yesterday. Kristen and I were standing in a hotel Starbucks waiting to meet the one and only Erin Davis. (She’s the amazing gal who runs the LYWB Blog). I’d been interacting with Erin for several years via email but had never met her in person. I was so excited to finally meet face to face and have the opportunity to pick Erin’s brain about blogging, book writing, and getting published. In my mind, she was (and still is) the pro. I was (and still feel like) the newbie who was hoping to glean any wisdomFull Post

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January 4, 2017
6 Must Read Books for 2017

WATCH VIDEO  We want to share with you 6 books that have helped the two of us tremendously in our walk with God. These books have helped the two of us get our eyes off of ourselves and onto Christ instead. In a nutshell, these books have helped to radically change our lives. We can’t recommend them enough. 1. Women of the Word: How to Study the Bible with Both our Hearts and our Minds  We all know it’s important to study God’s Word. But sometimes it’s hard to know where to start. What’s more, a lack of time, emotionally driven approaches, and past frustrations can erode our resolve toFull Post

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January 2, 2017
Top 5 Most Popular and Shared Posts from 2016

Whether you’ve been reading the GirlDefined blog for a while or you’re new to our website, we are SO excited to enter this brand new year with you.  God is so good and He’s done amazing things in your lives (as we’ve learned from the many emails you all have sent us), and we praise Him for that! Some of you have shared how God used the GirlDefined blog posts and vlogs to help you overcome the darkest of sins, relationship struggles, guy complications, unfulfilled longings, growing in your walk with God, and much, much more. For that, we raise a glass of sparkling grape juice and joyously say, “Amen!Full Post

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December 30, 2016
The Surest Way to Find True Love this Year

“Maybe this will be my year!” she squealed. “Maybe I’ll finally meet the man of my dreams.” The hopes of finding “true love” is on the minds of a lot of single people as the new year rolls around. It was for me when I was single! The anticipation of a new beginning and all that the year might hold is an exciting thing. There’s just something fresh and exhilarating about the unknowns and the what-ifs. Right? If you’re single and hoping to get married, chances are you’ve probably wondered if this is your year too. You’ve probably wondered if Mr. Right is going to finally make his grandFull Post

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December 28, 2016
Practical Tips for Having a Thriving Relationship with God

WATCH VIDEO The two of us love God. We’re so grateful for Jesus. We’re thankful for God’s Word. But despite having these desires, meaningful personal devotions have often been a struggle for the two of us. Can you relate? Maybe you (like us) desire to dig into God’s Word, meditate on Scripture, and pray powerful prayers. But (again, like us) you’re just not sure how to make it happen. We’ve learned that with a few simple tools in our belt we can make our personal devotion time one of meaning, connection, and revival. Here are a few of our own practical tips for having a thriving relationship with God.Full Post

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December 21, 2016
Choosing to Reflect Christ in a Self-Absorbed Society

WATCH VIDEO  When the two of us were in high school, we strategized a plan to draw as much attention to ourselves as possible. We strapped on the high heels and strutted through the mall. We soaked up the attention we received from the young guys working the kiosks and enjoyed every glance that turned our way. Attention. That’s what we wanted. We wanted people to look at us. We wanted people to admire us. We wanted to people to stare at us. We wanted all eyes on us. Fast forward ten(ish) years to today and our goal is no longer to bring attention to ourselves but to pointFull Post

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December 16, 2016
3 of the Most Popular Places to Misplace Your Identity

“Meet Laura Van Ryn and Whitney Cerak: one buried under the wrong name, one in a coma and being cared for by the wrong family.” Those were some of the first words I read in a gripping book called, Mistaken Identity. This true and shocking story made national news when it was discovered that the identity of two college girls was accidentally swapped after a tragic bus accident. One girl died and was accidentally buried under the identity of her friend, who was in critical condition. After weeks of mourning the death of their daughter, the family was shocked to discover that it wasn’t their daughter they had buried,Full Post

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December 14, 2016
Shocking Results from the Past 100 Years of Beauty

WATCH VIDEO  After doing some more in-depth research on beauty, the two of us came across information that shocked us. We had no idea just how flakey the culture’s standards for beauty truly are. Get this. Over the past 100 years, the ideal body for a woman has changed drastically at least ten times. 1910: The Gibson Girl 1920: The Flapper 1930: May West 1940: Rita Hayworth 1950: Marilyn Monroe 1960: Twiggy 1970: Farrah Fawcett 1980: Jane Fonda 1990: Kate Moss 2000: The Victoria’s Secret Model When the two of us look over that list and see the drastic changes, we can’t help but get a little upset. InsteadFull Post

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December 9, 2016
The Hardest Thing About Being a Christian Married Girl

There he was. After all these years. Standing tall in a tux. Looking extremely handsome. And smiling directly at me. Walking down the aisle toward my soon-to-be husband was an experience unlike any other. This was the moment I had been dreaming of for years. This was the moment I had been waiting for during our entire engagement. This was it. Getting married to the man of my dreams was an incredible experience. And living life as a married woman for the past five and a half years has been out-of-this-world awesome. Getting married someday is a dream that most of us, as girls have. The popularity of bridalFull Post

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December 7, 2016
Why We Gave up Modeling to Pursue Ministry Instead

WATCH VIDEO The modeling world looked glamorous and the two of us wanted to give it a try. The promised money and fame looked enticing until it became a possible reality. We chose to give up modeling for something so much better. Here is a snippet from our story in Girl Defined: “The two of us were both in our early twenties and desperately curious. The seed that had taken root in our hearts as young girls was finally coming to bloom. We wanted to explore the modeling world. Truthfully, our hopes weren’t that high. We assumed, out- side of a miracle, that our moral convictions and living as modelsFull Post

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December 5, 2016
Epic Wisdom From a Thirty Nine Year Old Wife and Mom

Every now and then I meet an older gal who strikes me as a seriously godly woman, a woman whom I hope to be like someday. Today, I want to introduce you to one of those godly gals. Say hello to Amanda. She’s a super sweet thirty-nine-year-old awesome wife and an amazing mom to four adorable boys. She’s packed full of wisdom and has shared some of her secrets below. Check it out. Why is your relationship with God so important to you? I belong to God, first because He created me and a second time because He bought me with the death of His Son and made me HisFull Post

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December 2, 2016
The #1 Beauty Hack Every Christian Girl Needs to Know

Beauty hacks. They’re all the rage, right? Just do a quick Google search and you’ll have instant access to beauty hacks that promise a prettier you (in under 5 minutes flat). How about these: “25 Beauty Hacks To Make You Look Like A Million Dollars” or “44 Lazy Girl Beauty Hacks To Try Right Now.” Wait – 44 hacks? For the lazy girl? If I’m lazy, how am I supposed to have time for forty-four  beauty hacks? Sorry, I just thought that one was hilarious. Anyhow. I agree that some of these hacks can be helpful (i.e. I want to hug the person who invented dry shampoo!), but theyFull Post

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November 30, 2016
What to Do When Romance Isn’t a Part of Your Holiday Season

WATCH VIDEO  You hear the music, you see the pictures, you feel the “love in the air” and you just wish you had a man to enjoy it with. But, you don’t. It’s just little old you with your Christmas music and peppermint mocha. You dream of the day when you will have a family of your own and someone to “steal a kiss under the mistletoe” with, but that’s not your current reality. A New Perspective and a Little Bit of Hope  We want to share with you a new perspective and a little bit of hope. We want to encourage you with some nuggets of truth thatFull Post

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November 28, 2016
What Happened to “Till Death Do us Part”?

The bride and groom were beaming with joy as they rushed down the aisle of cheering guests. The cheers grew louder as they stopped mid-line and the groom leaned in for a picture perfect kiss. Within moments their “just married” getaway car zoomed out of the church parking lot leaving the sound of dragging clickety cans to the cheering guests. Fast forward 3 years. The words “for better or for worse” and “till death do us part” have faded into the background. The reality of a tight budget, a screaming one-year-old, and schedules that are packed, began to take a serious toll. The bride and groom had long forgottenFull Post

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November 25, 2016
10 Questions to Ask Before Falling Head-Over-Heels for Him

Starstruck. Fangirling. Infatuated. Obsessed. All of these words could have been used to describe the state of my mind and heart one cold wintery night. I had no idea who he was, but I was anxious and ready to find out. As a young teen girl, this was the first serious crush I had that lasted more than a few months. As I share in a previous blog post, I quickly became a crush-obsessed girl. Knowing nothing more about this guy than his good looks, athletic body, and piercing blue eyes, I was falling head-over-heels for him! I was the epitome of the word “infatuated” and allowed my strongFull Post

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November 22, 2016
The Quickest Way to Ruin Your Holidays

WATCH VIDEO  The holiday season is supposed to be the happiest, most joyful, and celebratory time of the year, right? Unfortunately, there have been times in the two of our lives where the holidays have been some of the most miserable. Looking back on those “miserable” holidays, we realize exactly where we went wrong. High Expectations.  Self-Centered Attitudes. Lot’s of Complaints.  We really want to help you avoid ruining your holiday season by getting rid of these three attitudes. We truly believe that the holidays can be some of the happiest and most joyful times of the year if you have a proper heart attitude and focus. WATCH VIDEO       

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November 20, 2016
Two Simple Truths that will Radically Change Your Heart and Attitude

Jennifer’s tears rolled down her cheeks as she struggled to express her thoughts. “I just don’t feel like God sees me or cares about me. He’s never answered a single one of my prayers and I never see Him working in my life. I don’t have many friends, my parents don’t give me the time of day, and my health is awful. I just can’t see any reason to live for God or praise Him. I honestly think He has forgotten about me.” The tears continued to fall and Jennifer seemed to be growing more depressed and discouraged as she thought about her life. From her perspective, life wasFull Post

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November 18, 2016
Resisting the Seduction of Beautifully Packaged Lies

I was chatting with a friend recently who shared an eye-opening experience with me. Being a huge music fan herself, she’s always on the lookout for new and inspiring tunes. One of her other friends had sent her a song to check out, which they had been raving about for days. Within seconds of listening to it on Spotify, she was instantly captivated by how incredible the voice of the singer was. She clicked repeat. And then repeated it again. After several days of playing the song over and over, she naturally memorized the lyrics. One morning while getting ready for the day, she was singing the song quietlyFull Post

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November 16, 2016
5 Dangers of a Secret Online Romantic Relationship

WATCH VLOG  They met at a church event. They started messaging and chatting online. Before long, their “innocent” chatter turned into flirting, which quickly turned into more intimate conversations. After several weeks, their online interactions were taking them down sexual roads they never thought they’d go. Stories like this aren’t uncommon.  With so many online chatting programs and social media tools, a girl and guy don’t have to search very hard to engage in a romantic fling. The scariest part about the entire thing is that it can all take place inside the four private walls of our very own bedroom. Why is this so scary? Because a secret romantic relationship canFull Post

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November 14, 2016
3 Reasons Jesus is More Satisfying than Cute Guys

This guy was not necessarily a crush, but I could feel him slowly becoming one. The last time I tried to talk to him we had to go separate ways on our busy college campus, so we didn’t get to finish our conversation. This was going to be different. After class, I noticed that he intentionally got “delayed” so that we could walk out at the same time. “How cute!” I thought to myself. We had a nice conversation as we walked. As usual, we were headed in opposite directions, but this time, we didn’t part ways as quickly. We stopped in the middle of a crowded area andFull Post

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November 9, 2016
6 Strategies to Help You Fight for Purity

WATCH VIDEO  Maintaining purity in our modern culture is not an easy thing to do. Unless we as Christian girls are vigilant in fighting for purity from the inside out, we will fail. We will give into temptation. It’s how we’re bent. It’s a natural part of our sin nature.  Our goal in creating this vlog is to challenge you, encourage you, and give you the tools you need to continue your fight for purity.  Whether you’ve thought about this topic before or not, these 6 tips will be powerful tools to equip you in your journey towards purity. WATCH VIDEO 

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November 7, 2016
When God Gives Someone Else What You Desperately Want

Have you ever wanted something so bad in life that you weren’t sure you could ever be happy without it? I have. And it was one of the hardest seasons of my life. I shared about that struggle a while back in a blog posts called: When God Doesn’t Give You What You Desperately Want. I shared about my journey from being single to getting married, and then to eventually struggling through infertility and two heartbreaking miscarriages. The one thing I so desperately wanted was to have kids, and it was the one thing God wasn’t giving me. Over the next few years God did some serious refining workFull Post

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November 4, 2016
Don’t Settle for a Guy Because You Think He’s the Last Option

Feelings of heartbreak, sadness and fear swept over me as I scanned the mountain range. I breathed in the fresh air hoping the great outdoors would do me some good. Life was hard at this moment in time. Like really really hard. I was in my early/mid-twenties and completely distraught over a life changing decision. To move forward in my relationship and get married, or, to end the relationship and enter back into singleness. Deep in my heart, I knew what I had to do. I knew I couldn’t continue the relationship out of fear and/or desperation. I knew I couldn’t get married out of the fear that thisFull Post

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November 1, 2016
6 Ideas on How to Live Your Single Years Well

WATCH VIDEO It’s time for us as single girls to recognize that singleness isn’t a season to “endure” until marriage, but a season to serve God to the best of our ability. Here are 6 ideas on how to live your single years well: 1. Don’t Complain 2. Speak Words of Gratitude 3. Get Outside of Yourself 4. Get the Bigger Picture 5. Surround Yourself With Young and Old 6. Commit to Growing That’s a wrap. Six ideas on how to live your single years well. Which one of the six areas would you like to commit to improving? Share your thoughts in the comments below. WATCH VIDEO 

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October 26, 2016
Halloween: When Good Girls Go Bad for One Day

WATCH VLOG With Halloween only a few days away, we want to encourage all of you Christian girls out there to stay nice this October 31st. Our culture loves to celebrate death, darkness, perversion, and evil…but we should be different. Our language, our dress, and even our celebrations should look different than the lost world. We hope this Vlog encourages you to continue being a light for Jesus, even on Halloween. WATCH VLOG

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October 21, 2016
Should We Bow Down at the Feet of Modern Hollywood Goddesses?

With a shocking 451,237,916 combined followers on Instagram, these five women are considered modern-day goddesses. These women have made their mark in our world and we’ve bowed down at their feet. Beauty, money, fame, and talent have given these women world-renowned fame. Our values and priorities are clearly seen in the way culture truly upholds and praises these women. Giving them names such as “Queen” and “Goddess.” Who are these women that claim the love and admiration of hundreds of millions? They are none other than Selena Gomez, Taylor Swift, Beyonce, Ariana Grande, and Kim Kardashian. Above all other celebrities in the world, these five hold the highest numberFull Post

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October 19, 2016
8 Reasons We Aren’t Feminists

WATCH VLOG If you are familiar with our ministry you know that, we created GirlDefined to help girls “get back to God’s design.” As a whole, we as Christian girls and women are really struggling to understand what God’s design is for our lives and how to practically live it out. Over the past 50 years, the feminist movement has sought redefine womanhood on their own terms. Rather than looking to God’s Word for solutions and answers, we as women, have decided to take matters into our own hands. Yes, feminism has done some good over the years, but by and large it has left women more confused and unfulfilled thanFull Post

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October 11, 2016
The Most Challenging Things About Being a Christian Teen Girl

WATCH VIDEO  In our day and age, it’s so hard to stay focused on honoring God rather than joining the popular crowd. It’s even harder when most girls (even in the church) around you don’t take their spiritual life seriously.  If you’re a teen girl living in any part of the world, you know the struggle I’m talking about. It’s a battle I face and I’m sure you are facing it too. It can be really discouraging. It’s not easy to be a teen girl in today’s culture, but I am slowly learning that the road less traveled is totally worth it. WATCH VIDEO 

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October 7, 2016
The One Thing You Desperately Need in a Future Husband (FREE GIVEAWAY)

The moment his piercing blue eyes glanced in my direction my heart melted into a pile of serious infatuation. This guy was everything I’d ever dreamed of and then some. He was handsome with an extra dose of Hollywood swag. In my mind, I had us happily married and imagined myself as the luckiest girl on planet earth. My entire future happiness and marital bliss were being based off one thing…my physical attraction to “Mr. Hollywood” himself. I knew nothing (literally nothing) about this guy, except for his looks. Long story short, I ended up meeting and getting to know Mr. Hollywood and the two of us developed aFull Post

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October 5, 2016
5 Tips for Overcoming Crazy Girl Emotions

WATCH VIDEO  We as girls seem to wear our emotions on our sleeves. When we feel good, we are happy. When we feel bad, we are unhappy. It can switch in a matter of a split second and it can happen back-and-forth multiple times in a row. After doing some research and thinking this topic through, we’ve come up with 5 truths to help us as girls combat our “crazy girl” emotions.​ WATCH VIDEO 

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October 4, 2016
The Girl Defined Audio Book is Here!

We are so excited to announce that the Girl Defined audio book is now available!!! For a limited time the Girl Defined audio book will be available for only $5.00!! Clink on this link and enter the coupon code: AUDIOGIRL5 to receive your $5.00 audiobook! This special offer will end on October 18th. Keep on eye on the GirlDefined Blog (and our social media sites) because we will be doing some major FREE audiobook giveaways over the next two weeks (including signed copies)! You don’t want to miss out on the fun! The first giveaway is happening this Friday on the blog! Get the Audiobook

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October 3, 2016
Is Masturbation Wrong for Christian Girls? (Part 2)

Caution: This topic may not be appropriate for younger audiences. Without being unnecessarily graphic, my hope in writing this two part series is to offer helpful biblical counsel for the many Christian girls who are struggling in this area. This is the second half of a two part series on the topic of masturbation. If you missed my first post, I highly recommend reading it before you read this one. In the first post I shared about my journey to finding freedom from this struggle as well as 3 reasons masturbation is wrong for Christian girls. You can read the first post HERE. Understanding the damaging effects of lustFull Post

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September 30, 2016
Is Masturbation Wrong for Christian Girls? (Part 1)

Caution: This topic may not be appropriate for younger audiences. Without being unnecessarily graphic, my hope in writing this two part series is to offer helpful biblical counsel for the many Christian girls who are struggling in this area. It used to be that most blogs and books dealing with sexual sin issues were geared towards men. However, over the past few years many women have opened up about their own sexual sin struggles, expressing a need for help in this area as well. Praise the Lord! We, as women, are not immune to lustful sins any more than men are. Lust is not a guy problem…it’s a humanFull Post

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September 28, 2016
It Takes a Brave Girl to Live Out Biblical Womanhood

WATCH VIDEO  God is looking for women who will be brave in today’s society. We’re challenging you to be one of those women. To be one of the few who are willing to liberate yourself from the commonality of wimpy womanhood. Our generation is in need of Christian women who are willing to rise up and show the culture the powerful influence a God-defined woman can have.  In today’s vlog, we are going to show you how to be a BRAVE girl and embrace God’s truth in your everyday life . B = Bold A bold girl doesn’t shy away from truth. A bold girl is unafraid of whatFull Post

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September 26, 2016
The Secret to Becoming a Bold, Brave and Beautiful Woman

The stage was filled with the presence of a woman overflowing with confidence, security, authority, beauty, and boldness. Silence filled the auditorium as we all watched this mighty woman of God share counter-cultural truths that would utterly shock the average woman. She wasn’t scared or afraid to say what she was saying. She spoke like a woman who knew that her source of information was as true as true can be. This woman possesses the secret that we, women as a whole, desperately long for. She has found the secret to true womanhood. She knows that her Authority and Guide is tried and true. This woman has the answersFull Post

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September 23, 2016
When 7,000 Women Gather Together and Pray

Sitting in a room surrounded by 7,000 Christian women is an experience unlike any other. Bethany and I are at the True Woman 2016 Conference in Indianapolis right now! If you’re not familiar with this amazing women’s conference, I highly recommend checking it out. The theme for this year’s conference is on prayer and is called “Cry Out!” Every other year, Revive Our Hearts Ministries puts on this huge women’s conference, which brings in Christian women from all over the world. It’s amazing to see women from different countries, cultures, and languages gather together to seek the Lord and learn more about Him. From the beginning of this year,Full Post

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September 21, 2016
6 Guys You Shouldn’t Date, Court, or Marry

WATCH VIDEO  Over the years, we’ve learned very quickly that there are some Christian guys who would make great husbands, and some who would not. Life is too short to spend it married to someone whose heart isn’t totally turned towards God. There isn’t time to settle for a guy out of hopelessness, desperation or just plain emotional want. Here are the 6 types of guys we personally would never recommend for you to date, court, or marry. WATCH VIDEO 

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September 19, 2016
Understanding God’s “Road Map” For Your Womanhood

Driving through the backwood country roads of Texas without directions is not my idea of a fun day. I always try my best to plan ahead, look at the map and make sure I know the best route before leaving my house. This day was different. I was meeting up with some friends at a fun Texas style restaurant and I decided to fully rely on my phone’s GPS to get me there. Everything was going great until I was about halfway into my journey and my phone decided to stop working. The maps completely froze up and I basically had no idea where I was going or howFull Post

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September 16, 2016
The Birth Control Pill: Continuing the Conversation

I recently wrote a post called, The Birth Control Pill: What Every Christian Girl Needs to Know. As a Christian woman myself, my heart behind that post was to remind all of us that God’s plan for sex, marriage, and motherhood is much better than what our culture has been feeding us. I’d love to continue our previous conversation about the Pill and share more of my heart behind writing that post. Just consider this post Part 2. For the women who commented previously who take the Pill strictly for health issues, my heart goes out to you. I am genuinely sorry that you have to suffer from thingsFull Post

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September 14, 2016
4 Lies Our Raunch Culture is Feeding You

WATCH VLOG  Opening up your iTunes library and seeing album covers featuring half naked female artists has become the norm in our society today. Walking into a makeup store and being bombarded by large posters of sexualized women, checking out at the grocery and seeing magazines titled, “Best Sex Ever,” and driving down the highway with billboards featuring half naked women has become a normal part of our modern culture. However, this everyday raunchy reality isn’t the way America has always been. Not too long ago the majority of women were disgusted at the thought of being viewed as a sexual object. Most women despised pornography and viewed their intimate body parts as private property.Full Post

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September 12, 2016
My Body Isn’t Perfect and I’m Totally Okay With It

My hair was a wreck, my makeup was half-finished, I was running behind and my sweet friend was already at the restaurant waiting for me to arrive for our lunch date. I sprinted out the door and headed towards my location. I reached across the seat to grab my make-up so that I could finish (Yes! Sometimes I do makeup when I’m driving. Confession time.) and nothing was on the seat. I looked in the back row, under my feet, under the passenger’s seat, and nothing was there. Noooo!!! I realized I had left it inside on the kitchen counter. This was just not my day. Running late. MakeupFull Post

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September 9, 2016
The Birth Control Pill: What Every Christian Girl Needs to Know

Whether you’re on the Pill, know someone who is, or think you might be on it in the future, this post is a must read for every Christian girl. And since government data reveals that more than eight in 10 American women, ages 15 to 44, have taken the Pill at some point in their lives, we need to be educated on exactly what the Pill is, where it came from, and how it affects our bodies. The “Birth Control Pill” hit the American scene in 1960 and changed human history forever. For the first time ever, sexual intimacy and procreation were completely separated. The invention of The BirthFull Post

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September 7, 2016
Why “I Kissed Dating Goodbye” Didn’t Ruin Our Lives

WATCH VLOG  Do you remember the popular relationships book from the 90’s called “I Kissed Dating Goodbye” by Joshua Harris? This book has sold over one million copies since its original release, and has always been a controversial book. However, just more recently, we’ve seen article after article from people saying that this book has totally ruined their lives. One man commented and said, “this book has ruined my marriage and it will never be the same!” Ruined your life? Ruined your marriage?? Those are bold statements. Having read the book ourselves over 15 years ago, and not experienced a ruined life as a result, we thought we’d tackleFull Post

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September 5, 2016
Real Women Know How to Accept an Act of Chivalry

What better place to observe the possibility of chivalry than in a room full of young singles at a Bible study. And that’s exactly where I was. The room was packed to the brim and almost every spare chair had been pulled out and used by the late arrivals. Somehow a young lady had squeezed in unnoticed and ended up without a chair. She quietly made her way to a small ledge and found a way to lean/sit against it. After a few moments, I noticed a kind young man quietly making his way towards her with his chair. He started to pull the chair out and set itFull Post

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September 2, 2016
3 Reasons Beyoncé Isn’t Empowering to Women

Her larger-than-life persona, bold music, and powerful stage presence have crowned this woman as the epitome of modern girl power. She’s praised by millions as one of the most inspirational women of our day. She is Beyoncé. Also referred to as, Queen Bey. This female superstar has not only become an icon, she has been carefully and strategically crafted into a brand. And this brand is considered empowering to women. Millions of females (young and old) view her as their greatest role model in life. “I want to be just like her,” many girls have said. “I would die to talk to her!,” women have stated. But do weFull Post

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August 31, 2016
4 Must Know Truths for Single Girls Desiring Marriage

WATCH VIDEO Calling all the single girls! If you desire to get married some day (whether soon or in the far off future), this vlog was created especially for you. Being single can be hard at times…really hard. Especially if you’re hoping to get married sooner rather than later. In this vlog, we want to share with you 4 powerful truths that will help you live your single years well. These truths helped Kristen during her single years, and they are still helping Bethany as she waits on God’s timing for marriage. If you want to thrive during this season of your life, these 4 truths will help you doFull Post

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August 29, 2016
3 Ways to Reach Out to the New Girl at School

My heart felt like it was going to beat out of my chest as my dad dropped me off for my very first co-op class. I was thirteen and slowly learning how to brave the world of strangers. As a tall, skinny, slightly awkward teen, I wasn’t very confident in my social skills. Can you relate? Walking into a classroom full of people I’d never met made my heart race and my palms sweat. I couldn’t wait for the dreaded unknown to become known and a memory of my past. As I opened the door and walked into the classroom, I was greeted by a sweet, smiling teacher. SheFull Post

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August 24, 2016
10 Books Every Christian Girl Should Read

WATCH VIDEO  We want to give you the inside scoop on our top ten favorite books of all time. These are the ten books (outside of the Bible) that have had the biggest impact on our lives and have helped shaped us into the women that we are today. We guarantee that if you read these ten books with a willing heart to learn, you will not be the same girl by the time you finish. Through these books you will be equipped with the skills and understanding that can help you thrive as a woman. Here we go! The ten books that completely changed our life… WATCH VIDEO 

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August 22, 2016
The Problem With Constantly Comparing Yourself to Other Girls

My friend and I sat on the floor with our legs crisscrossed. My friend was getting married in just a few short months, and I had flown out to visit her before she entered the married season of life. After a few minutes of light hearted chit-chat, our conversation took on a more serious tone. My friend went on to explain to me that she has constantly struggled with comparing herself to the Victoria Secret models. Although she understands that God is the author of beauty, she sighed and said, “It’s just hard not compare myself to them.” Our conversation turned into a great time of refocusing on theFull Post

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August 19, 2016
How to Snap Out of it When You Feel Totally Down

I went through a challenging time in my life once and had a great temptation to turn to “stuff” (shopping, food, mochas, novels, etc.) to make myself feel good in the moment. Instead of handling my sad emotions in the right way by turning to God’s word, I tried to cover them up by shopping and buying fun stuff for myself. Thankfully, at just the right time, I ran across a great podcast by Nancy Leigh DeMoss. She gave am awesome piece of advice that I found extremely helpful during my time of temptation. She told a story about how she was in a down mood and didn’t feelFull Post

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August 17, 2016
3 Ways Christian Girls Can Promote Godly Manhood (VIDEO)

WATCH VIDEO  It’s time for you to understand, challenge, and encourage the men God has placed in your life. Are you willing to take a step out on a limb and do what only a handful of girls are doing? Are you willing to stand apart from the average girl and encourage guys to live to a higher standard? WATCH VIDEO 

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August 15, 2016
How Writing a Book about Sex Taught me the Secret to Love

When I took hold of the challenge to write a book about sex, and all the touchy subjects it touches, I had no idea I’d discover the secret to love. Sex illuminates the farthest corners of our hearts. It reveals the pain and the promise, our desire for more of everything we deeply want. Sex is the picture of Christ and His bride — too beautiful to behold — mysteriously expressed between a man and a woman. In marriage, sex is yada — or at least it should be.  Yada is the Hebrew word for “knew,” as in “Adam knew his wife Eve” and she conceived and bore a sonFull Post

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August 10, 2016
5 Powerful Truths for Overcoming Secret Sins (VIDEO)

WATCH VIDEO It is absolutely impossible to experience lasting freedom if we have ongoing, secret sin in our lives. This vlog will show you how to get rid of secret sin. WATCH VIDEO

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August 7, 2016
Are You Guilty of Being Bible Zoomer?

For those of you who don’t know me, I am a fast-paced type of a girl. I walk fast, I eat fast, I think fast, I talk fast. I even grew fast and tall. In some areas of life, that can be a great thing—but not always. When it comes to my personal devotion time and Bible reading, being fast-paced is not such great quality to have. The Bible is God-breathed (2 Tim. 3:16) It’s 100 percent God’s inspired Word written for each one of us. God perfectly orchestrated the Bible to give us the exact information that He wanted us to have. It’s packed full of wisdom, insight,Full Post

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August 5, 2016
Why You Should Love a Guy’s Heart More than His Hairdo

I couldn’t stop looking at him. He was one of my favorite early crushes. This guy was one of my brother’s basketball teammates and I just loved watching him run up and down the court. At 12 years old I was enthralled with him. He put little sparkles in his gel so his hair slightly shimmered as he played basketball. Oh! I thought I was in love! I even secretly gave him the endearing nickname “sparkly.” There was only one problem. “Sparkly” and I had never talked. In fact, I don’t even think he knew I existed. I adored his shimmering hairdo, but had no idea who he reallyFull Post

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August 3, 2016
5 Quick Tips to Having an Awesome Quiet Time

WATCH VIDEO Personal devotions can be hard. It’s hard to know what to study. It’s hard to feel motivated when you don’t know what to do. This video will give you 5 quick tips on how to get started. WATCH VIDEO

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August 1, 2016
Incredible Lessons from the Life of Corrie ten Boom

This past year I had the privilege of visiting Corrie ten Boom’s famous hiding place in Haarlem, Holland. In case you don’t know Corrie’s incredible story, let me fill you in. Corrie ten Boom and her family were watchmakers in Haarlem, Holland during World War II. As strong Christians, they willingly put themselves in danger by working undercover in an attempt to help Jews escape persecution from the Nazi regime. Corrie had no idea what her faithfulness to God would cost her, but she was willing to serve Him no matter the price. Word eventually spread throughout Haarlem about the undercover work Corrie was doing. The Nazis became increasingly suspicious andFull Post

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July 29, 2016
How I Handled the Hardest Breakup of My Life

Shortly after my twentieth birthday, I entered into my first serious relationship. Marriage was already on my radar and this guy (we’ll call him Bryan) definitely sparked my interest. My family really liked him and he seemed like a great fit! Things progressed quickly and it felt like I was “falling in love” with him. Before I knew it I began feeling subtle pressure from Bryan to speed up the “courtship” and quickly get engaged. I wanted to get engaged to him…but there was still a small part of me that wasn’t 100% on board. I just needed a little more time. Little did I know that I wouldFull Post

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July 27, 2016
Praying for Your Future Husband (VIDEO)

I started thinking about this topic when I was thirteen years old. I read a book that challenged me to start praying for my future husband. I opened up my journal and wrote down my five biggest prayers and heart cries for the man I will one day marry. My list of prayers for my future husband: 1. That he would not have a love for the world. 2. That he would think of others above himself. 3. That he would guard his mind. 4. That he would be committed to spiritual growth. 5. That he would have a 1st Corinthians 13 love. I wrote these prayers down yearsFull Post

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July 25, 2016
What Makes A Woman Truly Beautiful?

Did you know that God actually wants women to be out-of-this-world beautiful?  Believe it or not, God compares the stars, the cosmos, and galaxies with idea of true beauty! He connects these two seemly unrelated concepts with a really cool Greek word.  Hang tight with me as I briefly explain God’s poetic analogy in the following verse: 1 Peter 3:3-4 says “Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight isFull Post

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July 22, 2016
3 Practical Tips for Conquering Secret Sexual Thoughts

“I struggle with lustful thoughts all the time and I wish I could stop!” “I thought my sexuality was supposed to be a blessing…but I can’t seem to keep my mind pure! It doesn’t feel like a blessing anymore.” “Being single is a lot harder than I thought it would be! I battle against my sensual thoughts every night and it’s getting really old. Help!” Have you every has similar thoughts? Sexual thoughts and struggles are something that every Christian girl will battle at one time or another. Unfortunately, unlike most other struggles, this is one that can easily be kept under wraps. Many girls who struggle against lust keep it completelyFull Post

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July 20, 2016
How to Be Content When Your Heart’s Desire is Unfulfilled

WATCH VIDEO   Each one of us have those “If I only had” moments…  “If I only had ___________, then I’d be happy.” “If only I were married, then I’d be happy.” “If only I had a baby, then I’d be happy.” “If only I had a nicer car, then I’d be happy.” “If only I could buy more clothes, then I’d be happy.” Nobody’s life is perfect. We all have unfulfilled longings in our heart.  However, the two of us have learned (and continue to learn) how to be content even when our heart’s desire is unfulfilled. We pray that this vlog encourages you to find true contentment inFull Post

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July 17, 2016
How to Have God Honoring Friendships With Guys

Looking back on my high school years I realize how little I knew about interacting with guys. I would say, the one word that best described my interaction with young men, would probably be flirting. As a super outgoing, social, extroverted gal, flirting just seemed to be my most natural way of interaction. Some girls feel awkward around guys and run away out of fear, and some, like myself, revert to being overly friendly and flirty. I personally don’t think either option is a good one. Over the years God has convicted my heart in this area and I’ve come a long *long* way in my guy friendships. I’mFull Post

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July 15, 2016
3 Effective Ways to Prepare for Marriage

Have you ever noticed how some married couples seem to display a real, genuine relationship with each other? Being a guy with child­like wonder, I’m naturally curious. Why does he treat her with love, kindness, and care? Why does she respect, honor, and follow him? As single Christian guys and girls, we should be cultivating habits which are crucial for healthy marriages. Here are three effective ways the Lord has shown me to prepare for marriage during these single years. 1. View Marriage In Light of Eternity Many of us will focus on many of the practical details of preparing for an earthly marriage that we often lose sight ofFull Post

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July 13, 2016
Advice for Single Girls on How to Prepare for Marriage

WATCH VIDEO The two of us used to think that getting married would automatically transform us into “princess perfects.” We thought that, somehow, our flaws and sinful hearts would disappear into the background while we loved our husbands selflessly. Riiiight. If you’ve ever thought the same thing, this vlog is for you. Although Kristen has only been married for 5 years, she has learned a lot about marriage and true love and is sharing her insights on today’s vlog. If you’re a single girl in need of some advice on how to prepare for marriage, you’ll love today’s video. WATCH VIDEO

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July 11, 2016
What God Taught Me the Day I Almost Died

It was a hot summer day and I was doing the normal thing a kid would do. Swim! I was having a blast in the large pool with my family unaware of what was about to happen. I decided to take a dive under the large floating tube that my mom was sitting on. I gracefully swam underneath her and came up on the other side to take a breath…or so I thought. As I tried to surface for air, I felt my head hit something large instead. I was underneath the tube, not on the other side. I dove back down to escape the tube, but felt somethingFull Post

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July 8, 2016
When Wanting to be Accepted Turns Into an Obsession

It was a hot summer afternoon, deep in the heart of Texas. I was twenty-one years old and extremely self-conscious about looking good in front of other people. I would do almost anything to impress others. I  wanted to be liked. So imagine how I felt about driving a car as old as I was. Yeah, I wasn’t super thrilled about the idea. But the car was free (given to me by my grandparents), and it was in great working order. It was practical and got me where I needed to go. Even so, I was extremely self-conscious about driving it. When I would go hang out with myFull Post

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July 6, 2016
5 Wardrobe Hacks for Dressing Modestly (VIDEO)

WATCH VIDEO Just because the standards for modesty and decency are extremely low, we as Christian girls, don’t have to give in. We can stand strong in our convictions and continue to embrace purity. Although there aren’t many of us, we aren’t alone. We have each other. Modesty will always be a challenge, but one that we’ve discovered is totally worth fighting for. Without further ado…we give you our 5 FAVORITE wardrobe hacks for dressing modestly during the hot summer months. WATCH VIDEO

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July 4, 2016
Why Being an Independent Woman Isn’t Always Good

“Hey honey, I really think we should go talk about this some more,” Zack said in a serious tone. We had just finished having a rather intense discussion about something that we didn’t see eye-to-eye on (at all). My emotions were completely driving the train and I was “done” discussing it. I crossed my arms like a child throwing a fit and looked up at him with a frustrated look.   “Babe, come on.” He said in a firm, but loving tone. “Let’s go finish this conversation. We need to.” He gestured for me to join him on the couch. I could feel my independent spirit rising up fromFull Post

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July 1, 2016
A Single Guy’s Thoughts on Girls, Getting Married, and God

Girls like knowing what guys think. Right? I know I do. Especially when the guy is single, godly, and striving to honor God with his life. Well, I have something extra special for you today. Kristen and I interviewed a young man who is striving to honor God with his life as a single guy. We asked him five different questions and wanted to hear his honest opinion on each topic. The two of us were encouraged and challenged by his answers, and we think you will be too. 1. What are some of the most important qualities you are looking for in a future wife? The first thing thatFull Post

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June 29, 2016
Are Gorgeous Girls Worth More? | Vlog

WATCH VIDEO Apparently, there’s a certain group of people who claim that physical beauty can actually be measured. As girls, we see the value our culture places on their definition of beauty and we measure ourselves against it. We chase after a certain physical “look” because (deep in our hearts) we believe that gorgeous girls are worth more. But are they? WATCH VIDEO

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June 27, 2016
3 Signs You Love Looking at Yourself a Little Too Much

This mirror was like a magnet for my eyes. Every time I walked past this particular mirror in my house I looked into it. Without even realizing it, I had made it a habit to “check myself out” every time I walked by. Before I knew it, I was “checking myself out” every time I walked past any mirror. This subtle habit was rudely awakened one day during a construction project in my house. My favorite mirror had been removed from it’s normal place…but out of habit, I still looked in that same spot every time I walked by it. Instead of catching eyes with myself, a blank whiteFull Post

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June 24, 2016
Join The 7 Day GirlDefined Prayer Challenge

Over the past few years I’ve seen God at work in my life in incredible ways. I feel like I’ve had a front row seat to witnessing God answer prayers in my life and in the lives of those around me. Looking back I now realize that God has always been at work, I just haven’t been paying close enough attention. When I began seriously praying and taking all of my cares before the Lord, I finally had eyes to see what He was doing. I began to clearly see Him answer my prayers and I knew He was active in my life. Here are just a few examplesFull Post

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June 22, 2016
What Cow Tipping Taught Us About Living Beyond the Moment | Vlog

WATCH VLOG Back in high school the two of us decided to live in the moment and ignore any potential consequences due to our actions. The two of us learned the hard way and we are hoping you can learn from our mistakes. In this video we challenge you to live beyond the moment and make your one life count. Don’t get so caught up in the here-and-now that you forget the One you should ultimately be striving to glorify. Watch today’s vlog for some fresh ideas on how you can make your life count. WATCH VLOG

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June 20, 2016
15 Fun Ideas to Help You Deepen Your Relationships

Ever since Zack and I got married (5 years ago!), we have always made it a huge priority to have a special date night once a week. To keep things interesting, we’ve always taken turns planning the activity. We decided that he would plan the first and third Friday nights of the month, and I would plan the second and fourth. After several months of planning my turn for date nights, I was running low on new and exciting ideas. I had exhausted my internet research and couldn’t find anything new. There were some great Christian movies out, so I decided to rent one and keep the date night relaxing and simple.Full Post

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June 16, 2016
Is a Perfect Body and Pretty Face Enough to Satisfy?

I recently met Jana, a girl from Germany, who is living in America as an au-pair nanny. She told me that, “getting a chance to live in America was like a dream.” Now that she has been here for a good 8 months, I was curious what her perspective on America was. Jana described America as a place where, “everyone appears to be living in a fantasy in the public eye, but they are depressed and unhappy when they are at home.” She continued, “all of the girls, old or young, seem to put so much focus on their outward appearance. I feel like I am a normal dressFull Post

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June 15, 2016
Answering Your Guy Questions: Dating, Bad Relationships, & Guy Friends | Vlog

WATCH VLOG Today – we’ve decided to dedicate this entire vlog to answering your guy questions. We’ve hand picked 3 of the most popular questions we hear from you and have attempted to answer them in this video. What is a good age to start dating? Is it better to be in a struggling relationship than to be single? How can I be “just friends” with guys? These are all great questions! Watch today’s vlog to hear our answers to each one of these questions. WATCH VLOG

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June 13, 2016
God’s Design for Sex is Way Better than Hollywood’s Cheap Imitation

We can’t escape the reality that we live in a highly sexualized American culture. Things are not quite as “behind the scenes” as they used to be. The magazines in the grocery store portray half naked women while billboards display seductive pictures to grab our attention. No matter how sheltered you may feel as a Christian girl, you can’t help but notice the sex-obsessed culture we live in. Every one of us has an opinion on the topic of sex and my question for you today is this: Where does your worldview on sex come from? Is it based on God’s Word, or on what Hollywood teaches? If you don’tFull Post

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June 10, 2016
Single Girl Don’t Waste Your Life Waiting for Marriage

As a young teen I never would have guessed that my season of singleness would have lasted as long as it has. I truly thought that by 27 I would be married. Surely! I thought I’d probably even have two or three kids by now as well. But, single? That wasn’t even on my radar. I realize that many of you are in the exact same position as myself. You’re single and you have no idea when, or if, marriage will be in your future. I get it. I get the singleness. I get the struggles. I get the longing for marriage. I get the wondering if you’ll beFull Post

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June 8, 2016
Strong Girls Obey God’s Word Even When it’s Hard | Vlog

WATCH VLOG If you want to be a strong girl, you must learn to obey God’s Word even when you don’t feel like it. We can’t be wimpy girls when it comes to honoring Christ with our lives. Way too many of us have given up on God’s truths when it’s hard or takes sacrifice. We’ve given into peer pressure, allowed the culture to shape our views, and have followed our emotions. We pray you will join the ranks of (truly) strong girls in today’s culture! We want to leave you with this question: What tough circumstances are you facing today that require you to be a strong girl forFull Post

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June 6, 2016
Me Before You: A Romantically Warped Message

Once upon a time there lived a handsome young man who wasn’t too excited about life. Suddenly, out of nowhere, a beautiful young woman drops into his life and changes everything. He laughs again like he used to and she slowly captures his heart. They fall in love and live happily ever after! The end. Oh wait – wrong ending. They fall in love, and then he decides to commit suicide because his life isn’t worth living. The end. Say hello to a modern romance. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, I’m referring to the new horror-film-disguised-as-a romantic-chick-flick, “Me Before You.” In this new blockbuster hit, aFull Post

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June 3, 2016
Embracing Modesty Throughout the Hot Summer Months

A few years ago I would have been shocked by some of the fashion trends currently taking over the clothing stores. Although it still saddens me, it doesn’t quite shock me like it used to. Extreme Immodesty has become our norm. Ultra mini shorts. Tiny crop tops. Sheer shirts. Practically painted on pants. This is the new norm. The standard for modesty is being lowered further and further and we as Christian girls are being faced with immense pressure to give in. I know that this is not new news to you. You see the stores. You see the way girls are dressings. You feel the pressure. You knowFull Post

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May 30, 2016
A Glimpse Inside the Most Beautiful Love Life

Have you ever seen a love so beautiful that it made you ache inside? And I’m not talking about the kind of perfect-engagement-shoot, puppy-eyed ardor of youth. I’m talking about the kind of love that is as well-worn and familiar as the wrinkles in the face of your beloved. The kind of love that expresses itself in unglamorous, unending deeds of devotion. It is Sunday morning at my grandmother’s church. I sit in the pew, waiting to sing a special number with my mom, hoping to be a blessing. Glancing around at the surrounding white haired heads and time-worn figures, my gaze is caught by a stooped man wheelingFull Post

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May 27, 2016
A Plea to Leave the Denim Underwear in the Drawer

I just have to say this up front so I can get it off my chest. There is no way that denim shorts –  so short and tight that they are digging into your body – can be comfortable. I don’t care how cute girls think they look, there is just no way. I wish there was a nice, discreet, graceful way to go about this topic, but there isn’t. This is one of those topics that I have to be real and honest about. The summer months are coming at us in hot and boiling waves. The sweaty skin, the sticky feeling, the greasy hair and the humidityFull Post

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May 25, 2016
Is it Okay to Be Obsessed with Guys? | Vlog

We have exciting news to share with you. GirlDefined Ministries is launching an official YouTube Channel today!! We will be posting new Vlogs every Wednesday from now on. If you have a specific topic or subject you’d like us to cover in an upcoming video, just email us HERE.  We hope to use our YouTube channel to reach an even broader audience with the powerful and freeing message of God-defined womanhood. We’d love your help in spreading the word about it! WATCH TODAY’S VLOG 

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May 23, 2016
When Reality Hit Me on My Honeymoon

“Babe, I have a great idea…” Zack said enthusiastically. “I want to plan our entire honeymoon by myself and completely surprise you!” With a shocked face and raised eyebrows, I smiled at my handsome fiance and asked, “Seriously? You want to surprise me and plan our entire honeymoon on your own?” “Yes!” Zack responded confidently. “You don’t have to worry about a thing. I’ve totally got this,” he added with a wink. With four months left until our wedding day, it was honestly a huge relief for me to remove the honeymoon planning from my to-do list. Before I knew it, the time had finally arrived and I foundFull Post

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May 18, 2016
Courageous Girls Needed To Live Out True Womanhood

The compliments didn’t fix it. The modeling offers didn’t make it go away. The attention from cute guys didn’t make it any better. I liked most everything about my physical appearance…except for this one thing. My nose. I sat in front of the mirror for 30 minutes one time staring at my face, wishing I had a different nose. I would pinch it to make it look more slender, questioning why God didn’t make that one easy adjustment. I was 16 years old and had unknowingly bought into many lies about my physical appearance and beauty. I wasn’t the only one either. Every female friend I had was discontentFull Post

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May 17, 2016
Celebrate! Girl Defined is Here!

We are so excited to announce that Girl Defined: God’s Radical Design for Beauty, Femininity and Identity officially launched today!!! Today is a day of celebration. A day to celebrate all that God has done and is going to do. We are in awe of His incredible grace and mercy in our lives and this book is a testimony of His faithfulness. Our prayer is that this book will show you God’s incredible design for the girl and help you see that God defined femininity is an amazing and beautiful thing. We’re inviting you to join us on a liberating journey toward a radically better vision for femininity. OneFull Post

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May 16, 2016
Figuring Out if Biblical Womanhood is for You

WATCH VIDEO HERE Have you ever wondered if Biblical womanhood is relevant for your life? Watch today’s video and hear amazing stories of five different girls who each overcame their personal struggles as a result of embracing God’s design for womanhood. This is the fourth and final video in our 4 part series titled, “4 Secrets to Brave and Bold Womanhood.” PS Today is the LAST day to get the FREE pre-order bonus package for ordering Girl Defined. You don’t want to miss this! More info HERE.   

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May 13, 2016
Should Christian Girls Date Non-Christian Guys?

Back in high school, I remember walking out of Walmart and finding a secret “love note” stuck to my windshield. It was from none other than the Walmart parking lot cart guy himself! After weeks of catching him stare at me every time I pulled up, he finally (cleverly) spilled his interest in me. He invited me to join him on a romantic date to Chili’s *ahem* the following Tuesday. Well…long story short, I didn’t go. That marked the beginning and end of my Walmart romance. He seemed like a nice guy and all, I just wasn’t interested in dating around. But the bigger reason I said no wasFull Post

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May 11, 2016
Why Guys Aren’t the Reason I Dress Modestly

“Sometimes I wonder why I even dress modestly. I mean, guys see immodest women all the time anyways. It’s not like they don’t know what cleavage is. I’m starting to wonder if modesty is really worth it.” Those were the words of a girl who was feeling super discouraged about modesty. As she shared her heart with me, I felt like her words could have been my own. At this point in time (mid high school) I had some very similar thoughts running through my own mind. Why am I even doing this? Do guys really appreciate the effort that dressing modestly takes? Do they realize how inconvenient modestyFull Post

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May 9, 2016
I’ve only Kissed One Guy and I Don’t Regret it

Imagine kissing the love of your life for the first time ever…in front of 1,000 people. Yep. That was me. As I turned to face my brand new husband at the foot of our wedding altar, I knew the moment of truth had finally arrived. Neither of us had ever kissed anyone before, and we were about to give a rookie smooch with a thousand faces watching. As the pastor excitedly announced, “You may now kiss the bride…for the first time!,” one pressing question flashed through my mind. “Do I tilt my head to the left or to the right?!” Before I had time to figure it out, IFull Post

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May 5, 2016
The Ultimate “Squad Goal” for Christian Girls (Free Giveaway)

I’ll never forget the days of walking across the basketball court gym, with my teammates by my side, thinking I was Miss Amazing. This was my squad of girls and I was positive we were some of the coolest chicks on the planet. I liked my team, I liked my girls, I liked being a part of a  “squad.” I liked representing my team name and I liked having a group of people I could associate with. Fast forward to today and “squads” and “squad goals” are all the rage. I just recently saw a picture on social media of several famous celebrities and the title was captioned “squadFull Post

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May 4, 2016
3 Reasons Every Christian Girl Needs a Sisterhood

“We have a surprise for you!” our parents said with excitement. I, along with my six siblings, slowly filed into the kitchen, rubbing the sleep away from our eyes. I was a teenager at this point and not excited about “early morning” surprises. At this point in time my siblings consisted of 3 boys and 4 girls. “Well…” my mom said with a smile, taking a quick glance at my dad. “We have a little surprise for you!” My early morning brain tried to guess what it was. A vacation? A french toast for breakfast? Nope. Not a clue. “Well…” our mom continued. “In seven months, you’re going toFull Post

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May 2, 2016
Is It Okay to Date a Guy Who Isn’t a Virgin?

I’ll never forget the day I found out the guy I was in a relationship with was not a virgin. I felt like I’d been punched in the gut. I was so in love with him and never fathomed this would be a part of our future together. After I heard the news, I needed time to process it. I needed time to pray. I needed to search my heart and figure out if this was something I was willing to accept. After a lot of prayer and discussion, I came to the conclusion that I was willing and able to move forward in the relationship. Here are aFull Post

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April 29, 2016
Are you Falling Prey to the Big Bad Checklist?

I have a confession…and I’ll just be real here. I used to obsess over the fact that I had cellulite on my rear. Yeah. Even after I learned that 90% of women had cellulite, it didn’t matter. I wanted to have a perfectly flawless backside. No matter how much I worked out, certain areas of my body never seemed to get the memo. I don’t know why I cared so much either. This was pre-marriage, so that area of my body never saw the light of day. As I got older, I realized that my obsession with wanting to have a “perfect” rear was a result of something sneakyFull Post

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April 27, 2016
What a Single Guy Taught Me About Marriage

The other day I was hanging out with a group of solid Christian friends. We were chatting about life, catching up, and just having a great time. During our time out together, we had some great conversations about dating, romance, courtship and singleness. We went around in a circle and shared our thoughts on those topics. We answered questions like…Would we date? Court? How are we currently preparing for marriage? Etc. One of the single guys shared something that I found really encouraging and inspiring. I thought I would share it with you gals to encourage you and challenge you as well. In a condensed version, here’s what he said:Full Post

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April 25, 2016
Christian Girl’s Guide to Plan, Host, and Lead an Awesome Bible Study

“I’ve alway wanted to host a Bible study…but I’m just not sure how to do it!” “I really feel like God is prompting me to host a summer study…but I’m not sure I have the leadership skills to do it!” “Several of my friends have asked me to start a Bible study…but I don’t know what to do!” These are statements I’ve heard from a lot of girls over the years. Maybe you’ve said something similar. They have the heart and passion for leading a Bible study, but they just don’t know where to start or how to make it happen. If you have a desire to lead aFull Post

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April 22, 2016
5 Reasons You Should Lead a Summer Bible Study

I didn’t want to do it. My summer was busy. I was tired. I didn’t want to plan and lead a summer Bible study. I just wanted to enjoy my summer and focus on hanging with friends and having a good time. God had a different plan.  One evening, out of the blue, a mom of a sixteen year old girl texted me. She said that her and her daughter had been searching for a summer Bible study and couldn’t find anything. She said her daughter really wanted to do one but was having no success. She then went on to ask me if I would lead one forFull Post

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April 20, 2016
What Gorgeous Hair, Perfect Legs, and Long Eyelashes Can’t Get You

We’ve all seen those girls. The “perfect” ones. They have it all going for them. Perfect hair, flawless legs, long eyelashes, and a skinny waist. They seem to have it all. Right? Without even realizing it, we compare ourselves to them and instantly feel ugly. We instantly feel dissatisfied and ungrateful for our bodies. I know exactly how this game works because I’ve played it many times myself. You want to know what’s really crazy about this though? As we look at these “perfect girls” and compare ourselves to them, guess what? They’re doing the exact same thing about their bodies too. It’s hard to believe, but it’s true.Full Post

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April 17, 2016
3 Qualities a Guy Must Have Before You Marry Him

Have you ever wondered why some guys “stand-out” as solid Christian men? On the flip side, have you ever wondered why other guys behave as wimps, displaying immature and jerk-like attitudes? I’m a guy. Yes, I’ve seen both. Yes, I’ve experienced the immature behavior myself. Yes, young solid Christian guy leaders do still exist. And yes, they can be hard to spot at times. Understanding Christian guy leadership has burdened me deeply. Christian guy leaders are desperately needed. They’re needed for the church. They’re needed for young godly Christian single girls. They’re needed to raise families. But, most importantly, they’re needed for the Gospel, for Christ’s sake. As aFull Post

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April 15, 2016
10 Signs He’s Not the One for You

Most of you know that I’m married to an amazing guy named Zack. Throughout the course of our 10 month courtship, it became really clear that he was the man for me. There were specific signs I was looking for in his character, actions, words, worldview, and spiritual genuineness that helped me (and my family) determine whether he was “the one” or not. Obviously, Zack did turn out to be the one. All in, Zack had numerous signs of being a godly, mature, and faithful guy. However, not every guy that came into my life prior to Zack passed the test. In fact, there were some guys that hadFull Post

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April 13, 2016
Future Wife and Mom You Only Have 24hrs

Anna is your typical college age, happy-go-lucky, Christian girl. She’s on fire for God and is very outspoken on her college campus. The guys on campus know she isn’t interested in “messing around” and her professors are all aware of her strong faith in God. Anna takes her life as a Christian seriously and truly desires to live out biblical womanhood. She’s read the books, studied the Bible and has attended numerous conferences that champion God’s awesome design for women. She’s gung-ho-on-board with passages like Titus 2, Proverbs 31 and Ephesians 5. She’s even studied the topics of feminism, biblical submission in marriage and God-defined gender roles. This girlFull Post

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April 11, 2016
Why Modern Girls Should Embrace the Lost Art of Homemaking

Every time I walked into this particular house, I instantly felt swallowed alive by the chaos and mess. Dirty dishes all over the kitchen, laundry piled on the furniture, toys all over the floor, and the TV blaring. This home had no semblance of order, cleanliness or peace. It was chaos. Every time I visited my friend’s home, I left feeling more chaotic and unsettled than when I arrived (and btw, to all of my current friends who may read this, this is not your house. This happened many years ago. *wink*). In our upcoming book, I refer to this problem as the drive-thru kitchen and hotel bedroom lifestyle.Full Post

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April 8, 2016
How My Beauty Ruined My Sense of Worth

I woke up, looked in the mirror, and immediately disliked what I was seeing. During the night my face decided to turn into a broken out mess. Ugh! I was not a hampy camper. I washed, scrubbed and did my best to get rid of this ugly mess. Although my skin is far from perfect, I try my best to keep it clean and fresh. I use natural products, drink tons of water and avoid a lot of sugar on a regular basis. Despite my best efforts, it has a mind of its own. I’m sure many of you girls can relate to me on this one. I wishFull Post

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April 6, 2016
How My Selfishness in Marriage Ruined My Satisfaction

My husband and I recently celebrated two years of marriage. Yes, that’s not a long time compared to some, however God has taught me a lot. Let me just say this upfront – life doesn’t get easier when you get married. I’m sorry single friends…life doesn’t magically get easier with a man by your side (even if he’s amazing). After marriage, I realized how truly selfish and sinful I can be. I used to think it was extremely odd when I heard about people divorcing after two years. Then I got married and realized how selfishness can easily lead down a devastating road. As I allowed “my personal rights”Full Post

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April 4, 2016
Girls With Conviction Live With Passion

Mrs. Jenson walked me into the training room and explained what the next few weeks of my volunteer work would look like. This was the very first time I had volunteered at a pro-life center and I was super excited…and super nervous. I am passionate about life and was excited about the opportunity to help save babies from abortion. Little did I know just how deep my conviction against abortion and my passion for life was about to become. As Mrs. Jenson left the room she clicked play on one of their training videos. It was a video that went step-by-step through the process of abortion and what procedureFull Post

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April 1, 2016
Why Premarital Seduction Always Backfires

She was a missionary’s daughter. He was a missionary’s son. They noticed each other for the first time while serving on the mission field with their families in a remote village. They were both raised in families that loved the gospel. They were both raised in families that loved marriage. As the months stretched on, the missionary’s son decided to pursue this pretty brown-eyed girl. Things took off and both families were excited about the possibility of joining together in marriage. The relationship looked picture perfect from the outside. This couple appeared to be honoring God in their interactions with one another. They appeared to be pure and holyFull Post

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March 29, 2016
How to Find True Joy and Contentment as a Single Girl (Video)

WATCH VIDEO HERE I get it girls. I understand the fear, worry, discontentment and discouragement that can often times accompany our “single status.” I admit that I don’t have this whole “contentment” thing down pat. There are moments where I definitely struggle. I struggle to trust. I struggle to remain joyful. I struggle keep my eyes focused on the One who has the plan. Despite the fact that my desire to get married is currently unfulfilled, I’ve found something that has radically transformed my life. I’ve realized that true joy and contentment isn’t reserved for the super godly or hyper spiritual. True joy and contentment is available for eachFull Post

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March 28, 2016
How Modesty, Romance, and Femininity Relate to the Gospel

“Instead of wasting time on topics like modesty and romance…why don’t you keep the focus on the gospel? Your Christian blog should be all about loving Jesus.” Several girls have written that type of email to us here at GirlDefined Ministries asking why we waste time writing about “secondary” issues rather than keeping the focus on the gospel. They’ve expressed disappointment that we take time to write about “minor” issues like modesty, romance, and femininity. I think it’s time to answer their questions. Why do we take time to write about topics like modesty, romance and femininity? I mean, as Christian girls, shouldn’t we just focus on loving JesusFull Post

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March 25, 2016
The Day My Dreams Became a Reality

I’ll never forget the day that my lifelong dream, to become an official published author, became a glimmer of hope in my future. It was just a regular day with absolutely nothing special about it. Kristen and I were together, working on ministry projects and doing our usual work routine, when the email dropped in our inbox. The email that would change the course of our lives. Before I share the story with you, I want you to put yourself in our shoes for just a minute. Imagine that you’ve been dreaming, praying and hoping for the opportunity to became a published author. The more you research the lessFull Post

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March 23, 2016
Official Girl Defined Book Trailer is Here!

WATCH VIDEO HERE. Drumroll please!! We have been waiting for this day for months. We have been praying for this day for years. God has done the miraculous and we are so excited to announce and release this video for you today! Since you’re a special part of the GirlDefined team, we wanted you (our awesome subscribers) to see this video first. Then – after you watch it – we want to personally invite you to join us on an amazing journey! If you’ve ever asked yourself any of these questions, this journey is for you: Am I valuable? Am I beautiful? What’s my purpose as a woman? HowFull Post

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March 18, 2016
7 Reasons I’m Not a Feminist

With a bold title like this, some of you probably clapped your hands and cheered, while others of you raised one eyebrow in utter shock and confusion (and some of you just clicked off in disgust). How do I know this? Because I’ve read heartfelt emails from all three camps when it comes to this topic.   Here at GirlDefined, we’ve received dozens of emails cheering us on for taking a stand against feminism, but we’ve also received a handful of heartfelt emails genuinely wondering why we, as WOMEN, would ever be against feminism. Of course, we’ve also received some hate mail. In an attempt to clarify exactly whereFull Post

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March 15, 2016
Red Flags To Look For In a Romantic Relationship

The red flags were there, but I ignored them. I didn’t want to believe that my hours, upon hours, upon hours, of invested time would come to an end. Instead of facing the facts and acknowledging the “red flags” in my relationship, I ignored them. Why did I ignore them? For similar reasons many of you do (or have done) as well. I didn’t want to have to face the truth. I didn’t want to be honest with myself. I didn’t want to think about my future without him. I didn’t want to imagine being single. I didn’t want to face starting over. I didn’t want to deal withFull Post

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March 14, 2016
God’s Truth Helped Me Overcome Suicidal Thoughts

Three months ago I almost took my life. I didn’t like anything about my life. I felt the best thing to do would be to leave. Thankfully, by God’s grace, some friends spoke biblical truth to me, and I am still here today. My life, just like everybody else’s, is hard. I find myself wanting things to go my way and I don’t care if anyone gets hurt in the process. I’ve lost friend after friend and have cut myself just to deal with the pain. No matter what I did, nothing would get rid of the pain. I kept trying to find something to distract myself. I’d runFull Post

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March 10, 2016
How to Overcome Feelings and Live by Truth

A few years ago I had a conversation that I will never forget. It’s stuck in my brain and refuses to leave! Somehow, an acquaintance and I got on the topic of God, the Bible, and personal devotions. He explained to me his idea of being obsessed with Jesus. He told me that he likes to stay on spiritual highs in order to keep up his excitement for God and the Bible. He said that he likes to attend as many conferences as possible, listen to upbeat Christian music, and do things that get his emotions charged. Although I believe his intentions were good, I think his plan wasFull Post

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March 9, 2016
4 Reasons You Should Let Him Open Your Door

I married an amazing gentleman who has never failed to be chivalrous in our marriage. Even before Zack and I got married, he always did one little thing that I absolutely adore. He always opened the door. Not just restaurant doors and house doors. He opened (and still does) my car door too. Every time I get in or out of the car, he opens my door for me – regardless of who is driving. Does he need to open my door? No. Am I perfectly capable of opening my own door? Yes. But this little act of chivalry has taught me huge lessons about our God-defined roles asFull Post

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March 7, 2016
Start Preparing For Your Future Marriage

Let’s say that you’re at a time in your life where you could be in a relationship that leads to marriage. What are you doing to prepare for that role? It is an important stage in your life and you will probably (with God’s hand) be married for the rest of your life. But if we are headed for such a huge blessing and responsibility, then what are we to do to prepare for that? What knowledge should we pursue? What tips should we acquire? When I was younger my parents taught me that marriage was a big deal. It’s not just your wedding day that marks a significantFull Post

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