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Equally Valuable, Purposely Different

By: Bethany Beal

The world says that Girls can’t. We know that girls can. We’ve proved to the world that girls can rock, girls can be strong, girls can rap, girls can be funny, girls can play the lead and girls can run the show. You just have to be courageous and challenge the notion of what it means to be a girl. We’ve proved girls can.

It’s no surprise that when a recent makeup commercial had famous actors and singers quote lines like those, the commercial instantly received millions of views as soon as it hit youtube.

I don’t know if you realize it or not, but 21st century girls have picked a battle, and it’s against themselves.

Girls as a whole have decided that the male and female genders have been viewed as different for way too long. They want to smash that idea into the ground and show the world that girls can be just like guys, and in many cases, even better. They say that the qualities and characteristics that make girls distinctly female need to be removed. Girls need to show the world that there is no difference between genders and that a girl can do anything a guy can do. They say their cry is for equality, which they claim comes from sameness.

Hold on.

Can I ask a couple of questions? Since when did being distinctly girl become so incredibly bad? What’s so horrible about being a girl and why are we trying to fight against being one?

After thinking this through and doing some research, I came up with a few answers. I probably won’t get my own commercial for what I’m about to say and may get some hate mail for this. But I don’t really care. If that commercial can challenge the notion of what it means to be a girl, then I think I can as well. After all, they said that girls can. So I will.

1. Gender War Zone

Let’s go back to the very beginning. Do you remember who created the world? That’s right, God did. He then went on to create the male. Notice He didn’t create an “it” or ten different genders. He started out with one gender, the guy. After the guy (Adam) named all of the animals and saw that each animal had a companion, he wondered where his companion was. That’s when God stepped in and created the female. Notice, God didn’t create another male, He specifically created a female. Two distinctly different genders.

Fast forward a couple thousand years to the 21st century. What do we have? Girls and guys demeaning the opposite gender and fighting for sameness. We are in a war against our very own female gender. Instead of fighting to protect our femaleness and holding on to being girls, we are throwing it down the drain. We’ve been told that our value and worth comes from sameness. Unless we accomplish the same things as guys we simply aren’t equal or as valuable. If that’s the truth, then why did God create two different genders? Why didn’t God stop with the male or only create the female? Why go through all of the hassle to create two types if there really isn’t a difference?

2. Is equality based on sameness?

Let’s walk through a simple illustration. Take a look at your hands and your feet. Now think about this, how absolutely ridiculous would it be for the hand and foot to get into an argument over which is more important. It would be *let’s be honest* stupid. We all know the foot is extremely important and the hand is as well. Imagine how silly I would look If I tried to use my hands to fulfill my feet’s functions or used my feet to fulfill the hands functions. Both my hands and my feet bring me the most success in my life when they are working for me by acting in their God given functions.

As silly as that little illustration may sound (or look if you imagine it), it really drives home an important point. Difference and equality are not the same things.

How does that relate to the guy and the girl? As silly as it would be for the hands and feet to get into a debate over which is more important, it’s equally as silly for the male and the female to get into a debate over who is more important. I’ll make this really easy for you, neither the guy or the girl is more important. They are both equally important and valuable in God’s eyes, simply with different functions. Just like the hands and feet, the guy and girl are both at their best, bringing the most glory to God, when they live out their unique God given design.

3. What Makes a girl/guy valuable?

Where does your value come from? Does it come from what you can do, your actions, or something totally different? If you aren’t a Christian and you don’t believe in the Bible, you’d have to stick with the first answer. Your value comes from what you can do and how well you can do it. If you are a Christian and do believe the Bible is true, then your value as a girl (or guy) has nothing to do with you and everything to do with God.

Here is what God has to say about your worth. Guys and girls are both included in this:

  • You were fearfully and wonderfully made. Psalm 139:13-14
  • You were chosen as God’s child before you even existed. Ephesians 1:4
  • You are God’s very own possession, chosen to bring Him glory. You are His child. He has a home and inheritance waiting for you in Heaven.  Ephesians 1:13-14
  • While you were dead in your sins, Christ died for you. Romans 5:8
  • You were created in the image of God. Genesis 1:27

Stop and think about those five points I just listed out for you. Notice how none of them has anything to do with what you can do, but everything to do with what God did. Because He loved you in spite of your condition (dead in sin), you now have incredible worth.

You no longer have to fight for your worth like the girls in that commercial do. You are totally valued and loved by the one who created you.

4. Created for God

When your life is focused on your plans, your goals, your desires, it makes sense that your value and worth would be based on you. When you stop focusing on yourself and start focusing on the One who made you, it makes sense that your value and worth would come from God.

The Bible says that you were created for God’s glory (Isaiah 43:7). You weren’t created for your glory, pop culture’s glory or even your best friend’s glory. You were created for God’s glory. He created you with purpose and for a purpose. He created you as a girl to bring Himself glory in ways that guys can’t. In the same way He created guys to bring Himself glory in ways that girls can’t.

“True womanhood is a distinctive calling to display the glory of His Son in ways that would not be displayed if there were no womanhood.” – John Piper

I challenge you to look at chapter two in the book of Genesis. I want you to see for yourself that God created the male and the female different on purpose. Their worth and value has nothing to do with their differences. In fact, nowhere in the Bible will you see God say that either gender is more important.

It’s time to stop fighting against being a girl.

Stop fighting to become like guys and start embracing your true worth found in Jesus Christ. Only then will you be able to find that purpose and value that you so desperately long for.

The next time you are tempted to prove to the world that “girls can,” stop and ask yourself why? Why do you need to prove your worth as a girl to the world? They can’t add a single ounce of true worth to your life. Only God can. It’s time to stop fighting for sameness and start embracing our differences. All for God’s Glory.

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12 Responses to Equally Valuable, Purposely Different

  1. Elizabeth says:


  2. DaughteroftheKing says:

    Wow! This really hit home! Thank you!

  3. Justine Hilton says:

    Amen!! Just like the trinity (God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit), men and women are equal but have different roles. Great article!

  4. Mel says:

    I don’t think this is what they fight about, really. Its the fact that people are treated differently in the same circumstances. Sometimes, it makes sense that women get different treatment. Other times, like the fact that a man can get more money for the same job, it doesn’t. Forgive me if I don’t understand but its not a fight to make us more like men, its a fight to make ourselves equal to men. To be treated with equal fairness and worth. I don’t want to become a man, but I want to be held to the same level as a man, even if we are different.

  5. Elisabeth says:


  6. Kristen says:

    Good thoughts! I like your hands/feet illustration. =) Thank you for writing this.

  7. Pingback: 7 Reasons I’m Not a Feminist

  8. Sarah says:

    Feminism isn’t demonising feminity, society is. Notice how common it is to shame boys by calling them a “girl”. Female dominated proffessions get paid less than male dominated proffessions of the same skill level (just look at nursing compared to construction work, or the decline in real term wages of psychologists corrolating with the influx of women into the proffession). What women do is constantly belittles and under valued by society. Feminity is demonised. Is it any wonder that no one wants to be feminine?

    Christianity sees the value of feminity, for females wer created on God’s image, like males, and God himself is often described with both masculine and feminine traits. Christians should be trying to dismantle the structures in society that constantly devalue women’s work. Our society does not respect men and women equally the way the bible tells us that God does. Why aren’t more Christians trying to change that? God should be dictating how we live together as Christians, not society. Whether or not you believe there to be inherent differences between men and women, it’s high time we learn to equally value everyone!

  9. Wanda McDonald says:

    Sure we are different for procreation and companionship. It’s when those differences dictate ones position in a hierarchy where we start to feel that one is better than the other and reject being female. Since female gender has been dictated to be submissive, sibordinate, a follower, has to be obedient, incapable of strength and even incapable of mental capacity. While men get to be leaders, initiators, heros, the ones who build society, thought of as smarter, stronger etc. If men were told they had to be subordinate and obey women in fairly sure all men would rebel against that idea and feel like they drew the short straw. So no wonder most women fight against it. The irony is that all of the above are culturally dictated and not inherent traits of gender. I as a female am fully capable to lead, I can be just as smart or smarter than any man because my mental capacity is just as good. I can even be a fire fighter or join the military!. So why do we need to push this idea that God wanted women to be subordinate, weak, meek, obedient etc? Of course anyone told simply by virtue of what gender they happened to be born, their place forever in some hierarchy is dictated – of course they will try everything to prove that they can surpass that! I don’t plan on letting any male say I can’t do this or can’t do that because I am female.

    • Danielle Wegner says:

      God created men and women to be different but both equally valuable. The Bible does say that men are the head of the family and calls wives to obey their husbands, but it also tells husbands to respect and love their wives.

  10. Nickolas Dohrmann says:

    One of the traits that God created in men is the desire for the feminine traits we see in women. It’s a woman’s individual uniqueness differentiating them from any other woman while possessing the universal appealing feminine attributes shared by all women that God created in them that makes women the man’s perfect compliment . Men are instructed by God through Paul in Ephesians 5:25 that they are to “love their wives just as Christ loved the church. He gave up His life for her.” When God created man as head of woman, this came with an immense responsibility for men to not just love women, but love with the same love Christ had for His bride (the church). We are instructed to be prepared to lay down our life for our wife(women). That directive wasn’t given to women for men, mainly because one of the separate duties a man has toward a woman is showing them a love so righteously pure that it includes sacrificing our lives as her protector and provider. A women in response to this love are to submit to him as you would the Lord (Eph.5:22) Christ showed us this holy love through His sacrifice, and we are to submit to Him…this is the example God intended for how men and women are to view and love one another. This is God telling men just how valuable women are in His eyes, and we should see them the same way.

  11. Nola says:

    You say that men need to be the leaders because apparently men have more of a relationship with God and can hear from God more then I can, then you say that my worth is based on my relationship with God. How is that not supposed to make me feel worthless?

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