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How to Handle Awkward Situations

By: Bethany Baird

It’s tough and sometimes a little awkward saving my body for one man’s eyes alone. I had to face a tough situation recently when I was asked to be in a friends wedding. She is a long time childhood friend and was recently engaged to be married. I was so excited for my friend and love the fact that she would soon be married. She asked me to be a bridesmaid in her wedding! How exciting was that. There was only one problem, her bridesmaids dresses were strapless.

I knew I couldn’t wear the dress. 

As my friend and I sat there looking at the pictures of the dresses online, my face started to heat up and my palms started to get sweaty. I thought to myself “what am I going to say?” I knew I couldn’t wear a strapless dress and I knew she knew that I never had before. I didn’t know if she thought just because it was a wedding I could compromise or if I was going to have to explain it. Thankfully at the very end she asked me if I would be willing to wear a strapless dress. I very thoughtfully explained to her I wouldn’t, but that I could add sleeves/straps to the dress in a very professional and non distracting way. She said that would work great!

I know it’s going to be a little awkward being the only one with straps sewn onto my dress in the wedding, but I can’t compromise my standards for the sake of a bridesmaids dress. If worse came to worse and the bride and I couldn’t come to an agreement about the dress, I would have had to step out as a bridesmaid. No, I wouldn’t have wanted to step out, but, I wouldn’t have wanted to compromise either.

I realized that my body is for one man only.

I know, as young Christian girls, we have a lot to stand strong for. God has given us very shapely and beautiful bodies to be preserved for one mans eyes alone. Even if it’s hard and we come across challenging and awkward situations, lets keep our bodies covered-up to honor the Lord and our future husbands.

What do you think you would have done if you were asked to be in someones wedding and were asked to wear something you knew was immodest? Would you be willing to endure the awkward conversation and explain why you couldn’t wear that particular dress? Would you have just worn it to avoid the controversy?

Plan now for future awkward situations. 

It’s very important to set your standards on clothing now so that one day when you are faced with an awkward situation like I was, you won’t compromise. I have committed to never wear a strapless dress, halter top, string strap, etc. Now that I have that commitment with the Lord it’s not even an option for me. What commitments are you willing to make now so that you won’t compromise later?

Ecclesiastes 5:4-5 (ESV)
“When you vow a vow to God, do not delay paying it, for He has no pleasure in fools. Pay what you vow. It is better that you should not vow than that you should vow and not pay.”

Pray and then make a commitment to the Lord. Know that he is very serious about the commitments you make to Him.

Wedding Band

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  • DA

    Similarly to you I have been asked to walk in a wedding where the dress was “immodest” in one way or another. My sister and I both made it clear that we would not be able to participate if we had to wear those dresses. Surprisingly, the bride decided to change all of the dresses to a more modest version! We all looked beautiful and could be proud of the fact that we didn’t lower our standards!

    • Phoebe Saywell

      This happened to me recently, I’m going to be a bridesmaid at my brother’s wedding, and because I didn’t agree with the dresses his bride had originally chosen, she not only changed the bridesmaid dresses but also her wedding dress! It’s amazing how God helps us in these situations!

      • DA

        Wow, that is truly amazing! I love how God always works things out for our good…especially when we do the right thing! 🙂 Have fun at your brother’s wedding 😀

        • Phoebe Saywell

          Thank you, it was a beautiful day!

  • Madi

    Hello! I have been reading your blog, and it is so encouraging. I really feel like the Lord is convicting me on strapless dresses because for the longest time I thought, “It’s just a shoulder, right?” Then, I started thinking that in Proverbs 31, it says that she brings her husband good not harm all of the days of her life. How could she bring her husband good all the days of her life when she hasn’t even met him for the first half of of her life? She brings him good by honoring him and saving herself for him and him only. I know a lot of my friends say that they agree that our tops shouldn’t be too low, but when it comes to strapless dresses or short shorts or skirts, they say, “Everybody has legs or everybody has shoulders, so why cover them up. If that is a stumbling block for guys, then I think it’s time for them to get a grip. Why should we have to baby them?” I disagree. The Lord made women to be helpers to men, so if having to sew straps on to a dress or buy a different pair of shorts to fulfill the calling that God has given women, then why don’t we? Why shouldn’t we try to help men in every way we can? The Lord created me, so I intend to honor Him. I am sorry this is so long, but I have one question that I would like your advice on. What is the difference between a strapless dress, spaghetti strapped dress, or a dress with 1-inch or 2-inch straps?

  • Anon

    Bleh. I’m sick of the idea of women’s bodies being for one man only. Like we’re an object for this imaginary man who may or may not exist in the future. In my case, definitely not. I can’t be dealing with the sexist crap anymore.


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