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Is Being a Woman about More than Getting Married and Having Babies?

By: Bethany Beal

If being a woman is entirely about getting married and having babies, then Kristen and I are failing miserably.

I don’t have a husband, which means I don’t have children, and Kristen has a husband but God hasn’t given her children yet. As most of you know I would love to get married and Kristen would love to have children.

Despite our deep desires and open hearts toward those roles (being a wife and mother) God has chosen not to fulfill all of those desires in either of our lives.

Discovering True Womanhood

As a younger girl, I believed that the ultimate fulfillment and climax of my life would come from being a wife and a mom.

I would spend hours upon hours dreaming of my future and was sure God had created me first and foremost to fulfill those specific roles.

As I grew older I slowly (very slowly) discovered that although marriage and motherhood are extremely (emphasis on extremely) valuable roles, they are not the ultimate purpose for my womanhood.

They are not the ultimate purpose for your womanhood.

Important Note: This blog post isn’t intended to contradict or devalue anything we’ve written in the past about the importance of marriage. This blog post is simply to help make sure that our priorities are in the right order.

Your Ultimate Purpose

Your ultimate purpose as a woman is the same as every other human being on the planet. Male or female, black or white, tall or short, introvert or extroverted, it doesn’t matter.

We, as human beings, share a foundational purpose (and it doesn’t have to do with being married).

You were created first and foremost to live passionately for these 4 things:

1. For God’s Glory

When God created the very first humans He gave them the ability to sing, talk, dance, laugh, create, work and do so much more. Everything about their lives was intended to bring God perfect glory. Despite how far we’ve come from those perfect days in the Garden, our purpose remains the same. We were created for God’s glory.

“…everyone who is called by my name, whom I created for my glory, whom I formed and made” (Isaiah 43:7)

This first point should be the foundation of everything you do. Don’t believe the lie that you were made for you. You were not made for your glory, you were made for God’s glory.

2. To Declare His Praises

“My mouth will speak in praise of the LORD. Let every creature praise his holy name forever and ever” (Psalm 145:21).

“My mouth is filled with your praise, and with your glory all the day” (Psalm 71:8)

“Praise the LORD, my soul. LORD my God, you are very great; you are clothed with splendor and majesty” (Psalm 104:1)

You get the idea. We were made to declare God’s praises. There are dozens and dozens of verses that encourage this “praising God” lifestyle. Declaring God’s praises should be totally intertwined with your existence. The more your mouth is filled with praises for God, the more satisfied and fulfilled you will be.

3. To Become like Christ

If I play darts I have to focus intently on the bullseye in order to aim my dart in the right direction. In the same way, we have to focus on Christ in order to aim our life in the right direction. Becoming like Christ should be the bullseye for life.

“Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God” (Ephesians 5:1-2).

Your life isn’t ultimately about looking cool, being popular, making stacks of money, getting the right job, or having a perfect family. Your life is about becoming like Christ and reflecting Him through every choice you make.

4. To Make Disciples

We were created to tell others about Jesus and help others become more like Him. Your life should be constantly focused on creating Christ followers.

Single or married, every woman is capable of doing this. No excuses. In fact, it’s a command so this point shouldn’t even be optional.

“And Jesus came and said to them, ‘All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age’” (Matthew 28:16).

A Bigger Purpose

I’m so grateful that God has given us as women such clarity for our lives. We were made for Him. It’s soooo simple, yet so complicated.

Our true purpose never changes. In fact, this topic reminds me of that quote I pulled from my journal and shared with you all in a previous blog.

“When people ask me if I want to get married, I say, ‘absolutely!’ But not just for the sake of having a husband. I want to join forces and serve God in ways I couldn’t serve Him as a single. My goal in life (whether married or single) is always the same, serve God.” –Bethany’s Journal

Thankfully God doesn’t leave us empty handed on our true and ultimate purpose. Those four points I shared are only the start. Those points are the roots of your tree and everything else should grow and branch out from there.

Keep in mind, since God did create men and women to be different, we need to pursue His best plan for us as women. If you are interested in studying the practical side of your womanhood, I would encourage you to check out passages like Titus 2, Proverbs 31, as well as the book of Esther.

If you really want to gain a deeper and more thorough understanding of your womanhood, check out Girl Defined: God’s Radical Design for Beauty, Femininity, and Identity. That book is filled with everything you need to know to begin building a solid foundation for your womanhood.

Where is Your Heart?

I want to challenge you to evaluate your heart and ask yourself if those four points reflect your heart. Do you desire God’s glory above all else? Do you praise Him every day? Do strive hard to become like Christ? Do seek out people to invest in and help them become like Christ?

Why don’t you just pick one of the four to start with.

This week take time every day to live out the point you picked. If it’s “declare His praises” take time every day to praise God in private and in public.

I’d love to hear which point you picked and why. Feel free to share your thoughts with me in the comments section below.


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