Are You Playing Footsie with Sexual Temptation?

By: Kristen Clark

His heart beat faster as he purposely walked down the dark street. It was nighttime, and nobody else was out. He knew she lived in this area. He was hoping she would come out to meet him.

He glanced around to make sure no one saw him. He continued walking when she suddenly appeared in front of him. Without saying a word, she wrapped her arms around his neck and brazenly kissed him.

“My husband is gone,” she said in a seductive whisper. “Come with me and let’s have our fill of love until the morning!”

Like an ox being led to the slaughter, he immediately followed the seductress inside.

Who is this man and woman? They’re none other than the seductress and foolish man found in Proverbs 7. This man had a serious case of playing footsie with sexual temptation.

Take a quick pause and read Proverbs 7 (here).

Did you read it?

There are so many valuable lessons we can take away from Proverbs 7, but I think the most important lesson is the one on “discerning your direction.”

What do I mean by that? Well, the man in Proverbs 7 made several foolish choices which led him to ultimately commit adultery with a married woman.

His final “big sin” was a direct result of his initial choice to play footsie with sexual temptation.

First, he decided to leave his house in the middle of the night. Who is known for being out and about in the middle of the night? Prostitutes. Going out at night was his first wrong “footsie move.”

Second, he made the choice to walk down the exact street where the prostitute lived. We don’t know if he was going directly to her house, or simply hoping he would bump into her. Either way, he made the foolish choice of walking anywhere near her house.

Third, instead of running away from her smooth, seductive speech, he stood there and “listened” to everything she had to say. The more he listened the more she made sin sound irresistible. Without hesitation, he followed her to his doom.

He didn’t choose discernment. He didn’t carefully consider the direction he was taking.

Sadly, like the man in Proverbs 7, many of us as Christian girls think we can walk down streets of compromise and play footsie with sexual temptation and not get burned.

Here are some common ways we, as modern Christian girls, might be playing footsie with sexual temptation:

  • Getting on the computer late at night when nobody is around and surfing the internet.
  • Watching a movie containing sexual innuendos, sexual scenes, and immoral behavior.
  • Reading romance novels filled with overly sexualized and far too detailed “love” stories.
  • Downloading certain apps that you know will cause temptation for you.
  • Browsing YouTube and watching the most popular music videos. 
  • Scanning channels on TV and watching shows that seem interesting, without really knowing anything about them.
  • Choosing to read all the covers of those raunchy magazines that bombarde you at the grocery store checkout lane.
  • Engaging in texting conversations with boys without your parents knowing.  
  • Visiting certain Facebook pages that are filled with impure and immoral content.

Listen up girls, although some of these things might seem like “no big deal” they can become the very thing that will lead you down a road you never intended to go.

I’ve seen great Christian marriages crumble to the ground due to one spouse making the initial choice to play footsie with sexual temptation.

I’ve seen Christian girls entrapped in habitual pornographic sin due to the initial choice to play footsie with sexual temptation.

I’ve seen great Christian leaders and influencers lose their entire platform and ministry due to their initial choice to play footsie with sexual temptation.

I’ve seen single Christian girls become completely engrossed in an immoral relationship as a result of their initial choice to play footsie with sexual temptation.

Big dramatic sins almost always start with small compromises.

Ask any of those people if it was worth it, and they will all tell you no. Playing footsie with sexual temptation is never worth it.

As a Christian girl, I can’t encourage you enough to “discern your direction” in everything you do. Always ask yourself, “will this help me move towards purity, or away from it?” 

Be wise about what you watch. Be wise about what you engage in. Be wise about who you hang out with. Be wise about who you text. Be wise about how you use the internet. Be wise about what you think about.

Our world if full of sexual temptation. Be ready to engage the battle.

I want to end by encouraging you to pray and ask God to show you areas in your life where you might be opening yourself up to sexual temptation. You can even pray something like this:

Dear God,

I confess that I am a weak sinner in need of your constant grace and strength. I truly want to honor you with my life and my purity, so please help me do that. I ask you to reveal areas in my life where I’m opening myself up to sexual temptation. Please convict me of where I’m lacking discerning. I ask for your strength to help me overcome sexual temptation today. May my actions, my thoughts, and my motives be pure in your sight! Amen.

Questions to think about…

  • Is God convicting you of areas in your life where you might be opening yourself up to sexual temptation?
  • Are you doing anything right now that you know is sexually wrong? If so, what steps should you take today to change?
  • Do you own any movies, apps, books, magazine, etc. that encourage you to “play footsie” with sexual temptation? If so, I challenge you to throw away (or delete) those items today.

Photo Credit: Heregirl struggling

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  • Sandra

    I have to say I never thougt of that list, you published up here. But I am thankful for that. From now on, I will try my best to avoid the things you wrote down in that list and I will ask God to guide me. Thank you so much for sharing!

  • Thanks for this post! I’ve definitely struggled with the romance novels and decided this summer to put them away. Now I avoid almost all romance novels/movies because they usually only hurt me. I do desire complete purity, but it’s hard. Nevertheless, I am committed to purifying my words, actions, thoughts, and motives by God’s grace. I’m very thankful for that list of possible ways we can “play footsie” with temptation so that I can stay as far away as possible!

    Thank you! 🙂

    • Meredith

      Hi there, Anastasis. (:
      Can I recommend to you, reading Pride and Prejudice, or Emma, by Jane Austen? They’re both beautiful love stories, with no sexual content whatsoever. In fact, I don’t even think there’s a kiss in them.
      They’re just pure, lovely, love stories. ^^

      • Thanks for the recommendations! Those books/movies are actually the reason I wrote “almost all.” 😛 I appreciate both those (read and watched Pride & Prejudice, watched Emma), among a few others, for their pure romance that is based on character, not feelings or looks. I avoid MOST romance because the typical romance these days is based on emotions and looks. But the romances that are deeper and purer are what I love to read/watch so I can remember what a pure relationship looks like!

        Thanks! 🙂

  • Elisabeth

    Thanks for the post, but I have a question is daydreaming about your fav fairytale stars story’s and adding to them wrong if it’s just sweet innocent, slight,y romantic, adventuresome or family Orinted?Are writing fun and sweet Romantic story’s wrong?

    • Jesusfreak17

      I’m no expert but I think you mainly have to look at your intentions with it. Are you dwelling on this because you want something sexual or immoral from it? Look at the content. Is it appropriate enough that a little kid wouldn’t go “eww” to much? And lastly, is it interfering in any way with your relationship with God? There’s no easy answer, but hopefully that helps. 🙂

      • Elisabeth

        Thanks, I think I’ve determined,Are just innocent and fun since I’ve learned about discretion, and just enjoy think about fair tales and family the way it should be though in a real life since.Just so long as I don’t spend too much time on it, or overly glorify it, it’s fine.

        • Jesusfreak17

          Cool! Just remember to reevaluate every so often, since there’s danger of it later turning into something else.

  • Trish

    I love this. Every year, I teach my SS girls on the Proverbs 7 woman as well as the Proverbs 31 woman. I love this perspective on the Proverbs 7 woman. Thank you for all your articles. I share many of them with my SS girls! Keep up the great work!

  • Madison Mullins

    I love y’all so much! Have you ever thought of coming out with an app? I would totally get it in a heartbeat!

  • Leisha

    Does anyone recommend good wholesome movies?

    • Brooklyn

      A really good one right now is War Room. It just came out in theaters, and is really, really good!

      • Katie

        so bummed that we can’t go see it! Was it absolutely awesome? I’ve heard ppl say it’s even better than Fireproof/ Facing the Giants/ Courageous. What would you say? 🙂

        • Nicole

          YES! It’s an amazing movie! Totally worth seeing in the theaters!

    • Funmi ✞

      Here are some that a christian friend of mine recommended to me:
      “Amazing Grace (it’s about William Wilberfoce and the abolitionist movement in Great Britain), When Calls the Heart (it’s a new TV show on the Hallmark channel but I think the first season is on Netflix), Fireproof, Courageous, the Love Comes Softly series, the Ultimate Gift, One Night with the King, What If (2010), Letters to God, Faith like Potatoes and some of the Hallmark Christmas movies. I hope this helps!”

    • Katie

      @FunmiAjike:disqus had some really great ones I’d recommend! I’d also add, “Amazing Love”, “Mom’s Night Out”, “The Redemption of Henry Myers”, “Do You Believe”, “God’s Not Dead”, “This is Our Time”, “Virtuous”, “Alone, Yet Not Alone”, “Measure of a Man”, “Ring the Bell”, “October Baby”, “Time Changer”, and “Come What May” (**PHEW*)

  • Celtic Princess

    I remember Zack talking about this passage in First Light one Sunday, and he mentioned that the foolish man stood around talking to her for 7 verses full of red flags. It just reminded me that after I fall in pretty well any area, I can look back and see a dozen places where I should have turned around and didn’t. Listening to that music, while I was in that particular mood, by myself… etc.

  • Chelsy Bontrager

    So good. People need to hear this message today THANKYOU!

  • Elisabeth

    This more true of more often then not. Although I never do it with others.I want to stop but I just can’t help myself I need it too much.I listened to everything I could find which you have videoed and some that you have written.Your so great at it!!It has been a blessing to me!!Only know I have come to a place in my life where I have decided to grow up, and not just in the way the world does, with everything but Self control in the areas you speak on.If God will even help me, I want to,but there is one thing that scare, terrifys and is always on my mind, and never leaves as a worry that (especially after almost finishing booth of your video series),I find that I can not nor Will not surrender that God might want me to be single the rest of my life!!I’m only 18,but have lingered in the paths of loneliness, need and want more almost any one I know my age.For the first time when I decided I would no longer mask the symptoms , I find that If goes doesn’t give me the one he wants me to marry by age 21 or sooner I just can’t go on!!I’ll die literally, or do Any to get a guy if God won’t give me the one he wants me to have and especially if he doesn’t have one or me.I’ve done everything I think I can to peruse what I need in the right way.I’m at my breaking point.My question is simple, how can I trust fully, when I’d rather die then be single.Signed, A Friend Desperatly in need of help.

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