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A Single Guy’s Thoughts on Girls, Getting Married, and God

By: Bethany Baird

Girls like knowing what guys think. Right? I know I do. Especially when the guy is single, godly, and striving to honor God with his life.

Well, I have something extra special for you today. Kristen and I interviewed a young man who is striving to honor God with his life as a single guy. We asked him five different questions and wanted to hear his honest opinion on each topic.

The two of us were encouraged and challenged by his answers, and we think you will be too.

1. What are some of the most important qualities you are looking for in a future wife?

The first thing that I will be looking for in my future wife is someone who fears and loves the Lord, and places him first in her life. Proverbs 31:30 says, “charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.” If a girl has put Christ first in her life, she’ll have the rest of her priorities in proper order, and view them in the right perspective.

When a girl (or a guy for that matter) has a big view of God, problems will seem small in comparison. If her view of God is small, however, life’s problems will seem insurmountable.

Another quality I will be praying for is a girl who is respectful to her Dad during her years of singleness. I currently know a girl who thinks that her father is obnoxious. I also know a different young lady who can’t stop talking about how amazing her dad is. The comparison between the two girls is drastic! Honestly, it’s depressing to be with the girl who acts like her dad is a burden, but refreshing to be with my friend who loves her dad! God has placed a young woman’s dad in her life during this time, and if she is unsatisfied with his authority now, it’s a possibility she will not be the godly wife God intended her to be. Girls – respect and honor your dad.

2. What advice would you give to a single girl who is preparing for marriage?

I would say this. Make sure you’re seeking the Lord in everything and place him first in your life. There are a lot of distractions in this world: music, friends, movies. . . the list goes on and on. Some of these things might not be bad, but are they the best use of our time? As a guy, I ask myself this question all the time. If I don’t, I’ll get sidetracked and use the time God has given me for frivolous things instead of using it to accomplish God honoring, purposeful things.

Spend your time wisely – if you get married (or even if you remain single), you don’t want to look back and wish you would have invested your time wisely (e.g. reading your Bible or helping others) instead of seeing the latest blockbuster.

Another thing I would suggest is being careful with your relationships. Guard your heart in every relationship. An emotional attachment to a guy before you’re ready for marriage is definitely not a good thing. The possibility of you marrying the person whom you are involved with is small, and when you have a spouse these past relationships will only invade your marriage.

Finally, pray for both your Dad and your future husband. I can’t stress the importance of this. I’m praying for my future wife, and I hope she’s praying for me as well.

3. What do you find unattractive about a girl?

A girl who seeks everyone’s attention is unattractive. Not only does this show she is prideful, but that she will do anything to get attention. Whether it’s dressing provocatively, speaking more loudly than anyone around, or a handful of other things, it’s very unattractive to me.

As a guy, I find a girl who is humble and has a modest character more charming than one who is loud and obnoxious. This doesn’t mean you can’t be the life of the party – just don’t be the “loud lady folly” (Prov. 9:13).

4. Why do you think girls should dress modestly?

A girl should dress modestly because it honors both her future husband and the guys around her. Dressing modestly draws a guys’ eyes away from your body, and to your face, where his attention should be directed anyways.

Our culture flaunts the idea that the more skin you show, the more guys will be drawn to you. However, a guy striving to follow Christ will appreciate a cute, modest outfit on a girl – and he can actually have a conversation with her without wondering where to place his eyes.

Dressing modestly also shows respect for your brothers in Christ who are around you, and for your future husband. If the Bible says to honor your husband, don’t you think one way to honor him would be by wearing clothes that don’t draw attention to your body? Your body is reserved for your future husband and nobody else.

5. Why is a girl’s relationship with God important?

I was recently traveling with a wise friend and mentor of mine, who is also the president of a large ministry. He is constantly sharing bits of wisdom that he has learned over the years, both from life and from constant study of the Word of God. One evening, he surprised me by asking me what I’m looking for in a wife. After a brief pause, I named the first thing that came to mind – a quality in a woman that surpasses every other quality.

“I want the girl I marry to love the Lord with all her heart, soul, mind and strength.” I was about to go on, when my friend stopped me. He said, “that’s it right there. You don’t need to go any farther. If you find a girl who loves the Lord with all her heart, soul, and mind, every other quality will fall into place.”

What wisdom! Am I expecting a girl who places God first in her life to be perfect? Of course not – we’re all sinners. But having a love for God that surpasses a love for anything or anyone else will make a girl stand out as she builds Christ-like qualities and matures into a God-fearing woman.

Godly Guys Still Exist! 

Kristen and I wanted to share this interview with you so that you could be encouraged. We want you to know that godly guys still do exist. God hasn’t given up on raising up godly men. God is still at work in the lives of men just like He’s at work in the lives of women.

I really encourage you to ponder this young man’s answers and evaluate your own heart before God.

  • Are there areas of your life that need to be surrendered to God?
  • Are you doing certain things that you know are not honoring towards God?
  • Do you need to spend more time investing into your relationship with Christ?

PHOTO CREDIT 

Single Guy Looking

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  • JustBabs

    woow – am encouraged! thanx for sharing – God is in the process of manufacturing godliness out of men and women

  • I enjoy getting guys opinions on things in life, not in a legalistic way I just like knpowing what they think. I remember once asking a good guy friend of mine what he thought about the amount of makeup I wear (I hardly wear any, just lip gloss or lipstick, sometimes a tiny bit of blush that’s rear and occasionally I’ll wear eye-shadow.) He honestly answered and told me that it was fine and if I remember correctly he talked about how he appreciated the fact that I didn’t apply it to thickly, then he said that he also liked it when girls don’t wear makeup at all just giving his opinion not telling me what I should or shouldn’t do just a good old fashionsd honest answer.

  • Joanna

    Thank you for interviewing this guy. It was great to hear a christian guy’s perspective on this topic!

  • Thank you Guys for interviewing this wonderful godly guy! It was so fresh to get a guys perspective on this subject 🙂

  • Grace

    This was so awesome! Thank you for posting this!!

  • I loved reading this! Thanks for sharing!!

  • Adeline

    Thanks for giving us a guy’s point of view! However, I’d like to say something about fathers in #1. I agree that everyone should be respectful of their fathers, but some father-daugther relationships are far from perfect. There can be substance abuse, violence (both physical and verbal), and a whole bunch of other problems that may complicate the relationship a girl has with her father. That being said, the girl can still be respectful towards her father, but doubt that a girl with an abusive father will talk about how amazing he is. But that’s the thing about God’s grace. I believe that even a girl with an abusive father can become a godly wife through the healing and restoration God provides.

    • Anonymous

      I agree! There is a song called “Piece by Piece” by Kelly Clarkson, and it is about how her dad abandoned her when she was 6 years old. He wanted nothing to do with her until she was rich so he could benefit from her wealth, and that cannot be described as “amazing”. I wish sometimes that these articles would acknowledge that not everyone comes from a believing family who is interested living as Christian, and they may have broken families. 43% of children in America are living without their fathers. 65% of their mothers receive no child support. That doesn’t even account for all the other problems in broken families, so there should not be a subtle generalization that everyone reading this article comes from a family with a father, let alone a father who is serious about fulfilling the role of what God wants a father to be like in his daughter’s life. So many Old Testament heroes also had serious issues in their families, but we know that God restored them and can restore us today.

      • Seeking Truth

        Anonymous, this is a very good point about the need to speak to a broader swath of potential readers, and not just those who have grown up in a loving home.

  • Annemarie Carpenter

    thank yall so very much for sharing this! All of the articles that yall put up on here are so very encouraging and this one was especially so. To know that there are other young men and women out there somewhere who love the Lord and are striving to serve Him with their whole hearts as well… it’s truly a blessing! thank yall again!

    • Christian Country Girl

      I love your profile picture!

      • Annemarie Carpenter

        thank you! it’s actually a picture one of my sisters took of our paint mare a couple of years back… do you like horses? (:

        • Christian Country Girl

          Aww! Yes! I love horses! I really want one of my own, but we don’t have a place to keep them and they’re pretty expensive. 🙁 But I do get to ride sometimes and I absolutely love it!

  • Pingback: Los pensamientos de un chico soltero acerca de las chicas, casarse, y Dios. |()

  • Kristen P

    Wow!!!! I am mind blown! 🙂 That was an amazing post. I did realize areas in my life that I need to change. Who is the guy who you interviewed?

  • Gabrielle

    WONDERFUL, WONDERFUL, WONDERFUL POST!!! I gained a lot, and it was encouraging, and challenging!!

    Thanks SOOOOOO much for sharing! I always love hearing from godly young men!!

  • Josephine

    But what if your dad is not a good person and as a result you had to distance yourself from your father?

    • Allison

      You still need to honor and respect him, and not bad-mouth him 🙂

      • Saltasaurus

        Why tho

        • Allison

          ““Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long upon the land which the LORD your God is giving you.”
          ‭‭Exodus‬ ‭20:12‬ ‭

          • Saltasaurus

            “Children of abusive, toxic people don’t owe their parents crap.”
            Saltasaurus 4:20

          • Shanae B

            That verse isn’t in the Bible. This post also isn’t about toxic people. There are very bad situations some people go through that they need to get out of. Yet that isn’t the discussion here.

          • Mia

            lol are you kidding me? saltasaurus 4:20 is my favorite verse! You’re not a true christian 🙁

          • Shanae B

            The Book of Mormon isn’t the Bible. We’re not supposed to add or take away from it. Proverbs 30:5-6, Matthew 22:29, Revelation 22:18-19. You are facetious, vendictive, and feministic non Christian. Who’s only saying this because of a truthful comment on another post.

          • Saltasaurus

            “Saltasaurus 4:20 is a totally 100% real bible verse Shanae.”
            Dabonem 6:9

          • Shanae B

            You’re a troublemaker who doesn’t really have any biblical knowledge (if any other kind), come back when you get some.

    • Sophia Mullen

      You don’t owe an abusive person anything, especially if they are your parent. This opinion is going to be very unpopular on here, and I am anticipating backlash and all kinds of Bible verses. You don’t have to sugar coat and hide the truth of what he is and what he does… Anyone who says that truly does not understand. Please don’t defend him. Please continue to protect yourself. You may acknowledge that he is a person and as a result flawed. You can acknowledge what made him that way. You can acknowledge that you have also done terrible things in your life and may not be ‘better’ than he is… but never excuse whatever he does to hurt you or anyone else. The truth is harsh, but for every low there is an equal high. For every awful abominable thing there is something beautiful. Call it as it is.

  • Allison

    This is awesome!

  • Lexi

    Wow! This is such good insight! Thank you for sharing this wisdom with us, it really helped to put things into perspective.

  • And The Truth Is

    I sure do wish that the real good old fashioned ladies were still around today but unfortunately most if not all of them are gone by now.


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