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Personal Struggles
November 8, 2019
15 Amazing Things You Can Thank God for Today

Life on earth is a far cry from perfect. In fact, it can often feel overwhelmingly negative at times. In my own life, I’m tempted to focus on the things that go wrong more than the things that go right. I find myself zeroing in on the negative stuff until my sight turns into a depressing tunnel vision. I can’t see anything good anymore because I’m so zoomed in on what’s not going my way. Ever been there? Honestly, it’s a depressing and sad way to live. There’s no joy in the negative tunnel vision…yet we all do it regularly. Since this is the month for giving thanks, IFull Post

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November 6, 2019
Christian Girls Ask Honest Question About Sexual Purity

WATCH VIDEO If I feel like I may never get married, is it okay to find sexual pleasure in other ways?  What’s the best way to tell someone I’m waiting for marriage to have sex?  How far can I go until becoming sexually impure?  The two of us want you to know that you’re not alone when you ask these questions. We’ve asked similar questions ourselves. When it comes to the topics of sex, purity, longings and personal struggles, we (as Christian girls) want true biblical help. We don’t want to stay stuck in our confusion.  In today’s video, we unpack all of these questions and more. Join theFull Post

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October 18, 2019
My Journey of Trusting God Through Disappointment and Unfulfilled Longings

Some days you dance and some days you cry. This past year has been filled with both for me. Many of you know my story of infertility and the two early miscarriages Zack and I experienced 6 years ago. It has been a long journey, but God has been so faithful to give us peace, comfort, and even joy in the midst of our unfulfilled longings.⁣ But as we approached our 8 year anniversary a few months back, the most unexpected thing happened – I found out I was pregnant. ⁣ This news completely shocked Zack and me and we couldn’t believe it. My heart was filled with aFull Post

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October 16, 2019
4 Attitudes that Keep Single Women from Thriving

WATCH VIDEO  She’s thirty-six, single, and thriving. If you had asked her as a twenty-one-year-old what her future would look like, she would have described a beautiful life filled with children, a godly husband, and Jesus. But that’s not exactly how her story turned out. Despite her future playing out contrary to her dreams, Madga (our amazing Polish friend) has learned how to thrive right where God has her as a single woman. However, this didn’t come without walking through some challenging valleys of surrender and trust. Throughout her personal journey, Magda learned how to fight against the wrong attitudes that didn’t help her to trust God with herFull Post

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October 11, 2019
7 Habits of a Strong Christian Woman

As Christian women, I think there’s an unspoken narrative playing in our minds that goes something like this: “Christian women shouldn’t be strong. Christian women shouldn’t be brave and courageous. Christian women should remain passive and mind their own business.” This is false. Very false. Just look at some of the godly women in the Bible. Esther was a strong and courageous woman (Esther 1-5). Or how about Abigail (1 Samuel 25)? That girl was brave. Just look at Mary the virgin mother of Jesus (Luke 1-2). That girl had courage. The godly women of the Bible do not portray a picture of weak and wimpy womanhood. There are many strong,Full Post

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October 10, 2019
How to Trust God When Life is Really Challenging 

WATCH VIDEO Do you ever find yourself struggling alone, crying on your bed, or just feeling depresses about your future? This is a reality for most of us at some point in our lives. We all go through hard times. We all struggle. We all face hardship. We all face loneliness. We all face the temptation to worry about the future. When we face difficulty, what will we do with it? Where will we place our hope? In Christ or in something else? To help us deal with the future in a helpful and God-honoring way, we need to learn how to truly TRUST God. WATCH VIDEO

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October 7, 2019
Becoming a Girl of God-Worship Instead of Self-Worship

Jennifer’s tears rolled down her cheeks as she struggled to express her thoughts. “I just don’t feel like God sees me or cares about me. He’s never answered a single one of my prayers and I never see Him working in my life. I don’t have many friends, my parents don’t give me the time of day, and my health is awful. I just can’t see any reason to live for God or praise Him. I honestly think He has forgotten about me.” The tears continued to fall and Jennifer seemed to be growing more depressed and discouraged as she thought about her life. From her perspective, life wasFull Post

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September 30, 2019
3 Truths to Remember When Life is Hard

Life often feels like a long string of waiting. Waiting for change. Waiting for a breakthrough. For healing. A boyfriend or husband. Waiting for God to be faithful and trying to believe He still is. Waiting for the day when pain doesn’t greet you first thing in the morning and stay with until you go to sleep. Waiting out the ache of a broken heart, hoping that “one day it has to heal, right?” I’m in a season of waiting right now. I’m waiting for God to answer prayers I’ve prayed for years. Trying to fully live my single years, instead of looking at my very single status withFull Post

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September 11, 2019
How to Stop Worrying About What People Think of You

WATCH VLOG Everyone has an opinion about everyone else, right? We give each other labels, call each other names, and put each other in certain categories depending on what we think of that person. It can be so easy to get caught up in the trap of WORRYING about what everyone says. Worrying about what they think of us… worrying about what they might tell someone else about us… worrying if they don’t think we’re good enough or pretty enough. The list is endless.  Instead of staying trapped in the fear of what others might think of us, let’s find freedom! WATCH VLOG

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September 9, 2019
5 Verses about God to Bring You Hope

Several years ago I came across a verse in the Bible that slowly become my life verse. From my highschool days, to my first relationship days, to my breakups, and now to my marriage, these verses were/are my go to.  Trust in the Lord with all your heart And do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He will make your paths straight. Proverbs 3:5-6 These verses were a HUGE comfort and reminded me that God would make my paths straight. He had the plan. I just needed to trust Him completely.  After sharing those verses with friends and on social media, IFull Post

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September 6, 2019
Why You Can Be Joyful in Hard Times

Recently, I decided that I wanted to get a really good tan. In order to do that (without having to sit in the sun all day), I decided to go to the tanner. Now, I am not recommending going to the tanner or sitting out in the sun all day because I know the sun’s rays are harmful. Nor, am I saying that you need to be tan to be beautiful or have more worth or value. I am simply using this story to help make my point.  Okay, moving right along. Once entering the tanning room, I realized that the tanning bed looked like a coffin with clearFull Post

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September 4, 2019
Social Media and the Christian Girl | What You Need to Know 

WATCH VIDEO We decked ourselves in makeup and fashionable clothing, climbed up on our rooftop, and had our younger sister capture photo of us. A few hours later the photos were edited and uploaded to Facebook. The two of us just sat back and waited for the likes and comments to come pouring in. This was the teenage reality of Kristen and Bethany back in high school. Facebook was our first ever real exposure to social media. At this point in time, we didn’t have a good grasp on how to use social media in a God-honoring way. Fast forward a few years and the online world has exploded.Full Post

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September 2, 2019
Dealing with Depression During the College Years

I walked off of the graduation stage believing that all my anxiety, depression, lack of happiness and the negative feelings I had experienced through grad school were going to disappear immediately. Little did I know… reality was about to hit. I have always been both a straight-A student and a planner. During my four years of college, I made sure I graduated before all my classmates. I did it with honors, a dissertation, and an award. To do that, I had unhealthy habits. Yet, I thought it was fine. That I could do it all. So, when I decided to move from Mexico to the U.S. to pursue aFull Post

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August 30, 2019
5 Helpful Ways to Study Your Bible Each Day

I sat down to read my Bible one morning and just stared at the cover with a glazed look. Where do I even start? What do I even read?! This book is HUGE! How in the world do I “study” it? If you’ve ever had a moment like mine, this post is for you. I’ll be totally honest. I’ve gone through seasons of my life where I wasn’t sure what to read in my Bible, or even how to read it. I’ve gone through seasons of feeling totally disinterested in God’s Word altogether. As I’ve looked back on my Bible reading habits over the years, my “low” moments always haveFull Post

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August 23, 2019
Practical Advice for the Christian Girl Going off to College

I met up with my sweet friend, Rebecca (cute girl in the photo), yesterday who is about to move away for college. She’s 19 years old and just finished her freshman year at a local university. She’s planning to transfer to a different university this year which will take her away from her hometown, family, friends, and church. We got together to chat about her life and this new (big) transition that’s about to hit. We talked about church, friends, roommates, romance, campus life, how to stay plugged into the Word, and a lot of other things. As we chatted, I was honestly really impressed with Rebecca’s spiritual visionFull Post

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August 14, 2019
Our Thoughts on Josh Harris and the Purity Movement

WATCH VIDEO  In the wake of Joshua Harris’s recent public statement that he is no longer a Christian, many of you have emailed us asking for our thoughts on the matter. Like many of you, we grew up reading Josh Harris’s books and were greatly influenced by his bestseller, I Kissed Dating Goodbye. We are products of the so-called “purity culture” and have seen firsthand the positives and negatives of this movement. Our goal in making this video isn’t to bash Josh, his books, or the purity movement — but to take an honest look at the pros and cons of what has happened over the past 20 years,Full Post

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August 12, 2019
Single and Surviving or Single and Thriving?

I was one of those “undistracted singles” that was totally distracted by marriage. I spent half of my life totally focused on serving the Lord and the other half totally focused on finding my man. That was me, Bethany Baird, in her late teens and early twenties. Somewhere in-between wanting to make the most of my single years and desiring to live an “undistracted” life for Christ, I got distracted. Really distracted. I so wanted to serve Christ, but I also really wanted to get married. It wasn’t until my mid-to-late twenties that I finally understood and began to truly live out God’s call for my life. You knowFull Post

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August 2, 2019
God will Never, Never, Never Leave You

As I was walking on the railroad tracks near my home this morning, I came across a mamma possum carrying her babies on her back. I stopped and watched her waddle across the path. One of her babies had fallen off and was frantically running back and forth trying to find her. He was on the opposite side of the railroad tracks and they were just too tall for him. He couldn’t find her. She waddled into the bushes leaving him behind lost and helpless. Have you ever felt like that baby possum, lost and alone in a world you don’t understand? I know I have. We live inFull Post

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July 31, 2019
Q&A: How to serve God, being an introvert, and modesty hacks

WATCH VIDEO  We are keeping it down-to-earth in today’s vlog. You submitted your questions through Instagram and we picked a handful to answer. We are digging into everything from being an introvert to modesty hacks, to music, to serving God, to creativity! If you have questions that you’d like answered in the next Q&A video, leave your comments below. WATCH VIDEO   

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July 29, 2019
Responding to Anxiety and Stress in a God-Honoring Way

I remember the moment distinctly: it was the day before I was scheduled to take the ACT, and I was, as Anne of Green Gables would say, in the “depths of despair.” I usually get nervous when it comes to a test of my abilities, whether a normal school examination, giving a speech for a debate round, or a new social circumstance or event. But this feeling about the ACT was different. There was so much potential for this exam, so much riding on my score, that I felt that I was completely insufficient for the task. It was like I knew I would “fail.”I believed the lies thatFull Post

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July 26, 2019
Overcoming the Fear of What Other People Think About You

I couldn’t fall asleep. My heart was heavy and my mind was spinning with one thought – my imperfections. The day hadn’t gone very well. I thought of all the people who seemed better than me and I was overwhelmed by emotions. Eventually, I fell asleep. But mere sleep cannot remedy a struggle. Our culture today has a very loud voice and it wastes no time in telling us what they think we should be. In grocery store checkout lines and on billboard advertisements we see what the world claims to be “perfection.” Not to mention, friends, family members, peers and even people in the church throw expectations uponFull Post

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July 19, 2019
How to Be the Type of Friend You Wish You Had

I remember crying alone one night in my room feeling sad because I desperately wanted more friends. Deep down I wished that somebody would take a genuine interest in building a deep friendship with me. Even though I was surrounded by people in my family and church, I still felt left out. I still felt alone. Have you ever felt that way? Most of us long for deep friendships. And that’s normal. God created us to be relational beings. God designed marriage, family, siblings, friends, and community for a reason. We are relational because God is relational (Genesis 1-2). Longing for deep, meaningful, and vibrant friendships is a normalFull Post

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July 12, 2019
You Are Not Your Job Title

I stuffed over 400 envelopes yesterday. For seven hours, I folded letters, placed them in envelopes, and sealed them. At the end of my eight-hour shift, all I had to show for it was two boxes of filled envelopes. I felt slightly triumphant…but also incredibly disgusted. While I’m thankful to have a summer internship, I can’t help but feel a little insignificant. As I do my work—whether it’s stuffing envelopes, creating spreadsheets, or labeling papers—I sometimes wonder if I’ll ever do something important with my life. Will I ever get to achieve something valuable or attain true success in my career? Or will I be stuck at a desk,Full Post

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July 5, 2019
What I’ve Learned from Mentoring My Younger Sister

As most of you know, I’m the second oldest of eight kids and I grew up in a really big family. With five girls and three boys (and most of us being taller than 6 feet), we’re quite the sight walking into a restaurant together. I have honestly loved being a part of such a large and fun family over the years. However, being the oldest of all the girls, I’ve always felt the weight and responsibility of being a good influence on my younger sisters. I knew they were watching me. I knew they were learning things (whether good or bad) from the personal choices that I made. Full Post

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July 3, 2019
Why Should I Go To Church?

WATCH VIDEO  We grew up in the church. Every Sunday, we were there. It was a big deal to our parents and we rarely missed a week. When the two of us grew up, we had a choice to make. Would we continue going to church on our own? Was it still important for us to go?  That is the question we hope to answer today. We want to show you God’s founding of the church in the book of Acts and unpack why we’ve chosen to still attend church today. WATCH VIDEO 

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How to Break Free From Habitual Sin

WATCH VIDEO  We get it. Life can feel really discouraging when you’re stuck in habitual sin. You wonder if you’ll ever be free. If you’ll ever conquer. If you’ll ever move past it. The two of us have experienced God’s amazing forgiveness and power in our own lives. We want the same for you. God wants the same for you.  In today’s video, we’re sharing 4 biblical steps to help you break free from habitual sin. These steps have proven true in our lives and have given us the Christ-centered tools we’ve needed to truly walk in freedom. WATCH VIDEO 

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June 26, 2019
Answering Your Assumptions about Us

WATCH VIDEO  The two of us do our best to be as real, honest, and vulnerable with you all as possible. We share many of the highs (Bethany’s relationship journey and wedding) and we do our best to share the lows (Kristen and Zack’s infertility journey). However, there is only so much “realness” that can be had online. Social media is not a real-life relationship and that makes it hard to truly know the person on the other side of the screen. I’m sure you’ve made some assumptions about the two of us (it’s hard not to!). So for today, we created a fun video for you to clarify,Full Post

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June 17, 2019
5 Bible Verses Every Girl Should Know

Different moments, experiences, challenges, and joys in my life have resulted in me latching onto specific verses in Scripture. Verses that I’d studied or memorized. Those verses became my lifeline. When it came to singleness, I always turned to Proverbs 3:5-6. When it came to purity of heart, I always turned to Psalm 51:10. The list goes on. I intentionally memorized and meditated on specific passages that I knew would help me when I needed them most. Let’s just be real for a moment. The Bible is big. It can be hard to know where to turn to when you’re dealing with a specific challenge in your life. AlthoughFull Post

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June 7, 2019
Is Masturbation a God-Honoring Expression of Sex?

Masturbation is one of those words that causes a lot of people to feel awkward or embarrassed. Some people don’t even like to say the word out loud. However, this doesn’t mean we’re not thinking about it on the inside. We, as Christian women, have a lot of questions about masturbation. Is it a sin? What does God actually teach about it? Am I wrong for wanting it? Although the Bible never uses the word masturbation, it’s not silent on this issue. The Bible has a lot to say about sex, pleasure, intimacy, immorality, and purity because God cares deeply about these issues. He is the author and creatorFull Post

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June 5, 2019
Why Porn is a Counterfeit Version of Intimacy

WATCH VIDEO  Porn is more accessible today than at any other time in history. It’s now estimated that “35% of all internet downloads are porn-related.” “Porn is a global, estimated $97 billion dollar industry, with about $12 billion of that coming from the US.” Porn is wildly popular, but is it actually helpful to us? Is it giving what we truly want? Is it leaving us more satisfied relationally than before? As Christians, how should we think about pornography? Since God is the creator of sex and intimacy, let’s look at what He has to say. WATCH VIDEO 

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May 31, 2019
When Standing for Truth Causes People to Hate You

With close to 9 million views on YouTube, it’s our most popular video. The only problem? We didn’t make it. Unfortunately, this highly viewed video was created by another YouTube channel to mock GirlDefined. With our online presence growing each year, the opposition is growing as well. As hard as it is to be the recipients of such blatant ridicule, we know the battle isn’t actually against us. The real fight is a spiritual one (Eph. 6:12). It’s a fight for God’s truth and the gospel of Jesus Christ. Keeping this bigger picture in mind is what enables us to continue standing for God’s truth here at Girl Defined.Full Post

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May 29, 2019
Christian Teen Q&A: Modesty, School, Favorite Books

WATCH VLOG  “What tips do you have for finding modest clothes on a budget?” “Are you reading any good books right now?” “What did you do for school?” “Can you explain what your personal time with Jesus looks like each week?” These are actual questions that we’ve received from Christian teen girls. Since we get a lot of questions like this, we thought it would be fun to bring on our teen sister, Rebekah, to answer some of them. After doing a poll on Instagram, we pulled your most popular questions and asked them to Rebekah. What today’s vlog to find out what Rebekah has to say about modesty,Full Post

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May 22, 2019
My Story of Overcoming Social Fear and Worry

WATCH VIDEO From a young age, Ellissa avoided one-on-one conversations, parties, or large social gatherings because she was fearful and anxious about talking to people. She labeled herself as “shy” and just assumed she would always be this way.  But after years of hiding behind this label, she came to a place where she really didn’t like the person she had become. She didn’t like having shallow relationships and was tired of feeling totally awkward in conversations and social settings. So, she decided to take some serious action to overcome her social fear and learn how to build deep relationships. Watch her inspiring story by clicking the link below. WATCHFull Post

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May 17, 2019
What Every Married Woman Needs to Know About Sex

When it comes to addressing the topic of sexual intimacy and sexual desire, most of the posts we write on this blog are geared toward single women. This is because the central focus of our blog is to equip single women to gain a biblical understanding in all areas of life. However, we also get a lot of emails from married women who follow GirlDefined, so we thought a post written directly to our married sisters would be helpful too. I (Kristen) have been married for almost 8 years now to my husband, Zack. One of the areas of sweet blessing and sanctification that we have both experienced withinFull Post

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May 10, 2019
Why Sexually Charged Novels Never Truly Satisfy

She was beautiful. He was handsome. She desired male attention. He wanted some fun. She longed for romance. He wanted adventure. She wanted passion. He wanted pleasure. They meet…go on a date…and it doesn’t take long before their relationship turns intensely sexual. As you read their story, your inner passion and excitement ignite in an explosion of sexual longings deep within your heart. You want what they have. You want a steamy romance. You want a sexual adventure. This is the storyline of thousands of novels that have gained the ever-growing popular title of “erotica.” These novels come in all shades and colors and all have one common intent:Full Post

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May 8, 2019
Overcoming the Trap of Living to be Liked

WATCH VIDEO  Living for the approval of others is something that we all struggle with. Whether it’s at school, the workplace, church, or through social media, it’s something every single one of us will face. The two of us have wrestled with this throughout our entire lives. We often lose sight of God and begin focusing on gaining the approval of others. When we do this, we begin to measure our worth and value on what others think of us. That is not the way God intended for us to live. Instead of being enslaved to the opinions of others, let’s find true freedom in living for Christ. WATCH VIDEO 

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May 3, 2019
3 Biblical Truths About our Sexual Design

Every single one of us is born as a sexual being. We’re all born with a sexual design given to us by our Creator. Our sexuality wasn’t an afterthought, but an intentional part of God’s good plan for us. He created us to be fully sexual and fully human from the moment we were conceived. Sexuality isn’t a taboo topic for God, but one that He cares deeply about. He designed our sexuality and gave us an identity within it. He has a good plan for each of our lives and wants to help us embrace our sexuality according to His design.  However, in the society that we liveFull Post

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April 26, 2019
How to Deal with Secret Sexual Struggles

My heart was pounding. My hands were sweating. I knew I needed to be honest about my struggle but it was the last thing in the world I wanted to do. Especially to my parents. However, as scared as I was of being honest, I couldn’t bear the weight of my secret any longer. As a teen, I had been really struggling with my thought life for a while and lust seemed to be my constant companion. These sinful thoughts and imaginations also lead me down the path of regular masturbation. I tried to stop many times, but couldn’t seem to break the pattern in my life. I knewFull Post

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April 19, 2019
The One Thing Christian Girls Don’t Know About Sexuality

I was shocked when they announced the title of the next book study that we would be doing. I was sitting in a room in my church next to Zack, surrounded by other small group leaders. “This is a conversation that we need to have more often in church.” My pastor said. “The world is talking about sex, but the church is often silent. We need to change that.” He went on to share how struggles with porn addiction, adultery, sexual promiscuity, and uncontrolled lust were shattering church families and individuals within our own body. “That’s why it’s crucial for all of us, as leaders, to equip ourselves withinFull Post

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April 3, 2019
Sex, Purity, and the Longings of a Girl’s Heart [OFFICIAL TRAILER]

WATCH VIDEO As the culture around us seeks to normalize things like pornography, erotica, and casual sex, you may be feeling immense pressure to conform. In our brand new book, the two of us share honestly about our own struggles and victories and dig into topics such as: A Biblical understanding of your sexuality God’s good design for love, passion, and sex Why your longings for intimacy are a good thing How to conquer lust in your life How to deal with secret sexual struggles Practical help for embracing a life of purity How to find ultimate satisfaction in Jesus and much more. We hope you’ll grab a copyFull Post

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March 29, 2019
5 Signs Your Social Media Has Become an Idol

My alarm goes off. I rub my tired eyes not wanting to wake up. I roll over in bed and reach toward my nightstand in the dark. It’s here somewhere….oh — got it. I grab my phone and unplug it from the annoyingly short charger cord. The bright light from my phone half blinds my sleepy eyes. But I’m determined. I must…check…my…social media. Half asleep, I begin scanning the latest posts and comments. Like a robot set on repeat, this routine becomes the default for my mornings. Sound familiar to you? I am embarrassed to say that this pitiful scene has been the default method for many of my mornings. CheckingFull Post

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March 15, 2019
Resisting the Seduction of our Sexualized World

I was chatting with a friend recently who shared an eye-opening experience with me. Being a huge music fan herself, she’s always on the lookout for new and inspiring tunes. One of her other friends had sent her a song to check out, which they had been raving about for days. Within seconds of listening to it on Spotify, she was instantly captivated by how incredible the voice of the singer was. She clicked repeat. And then repeated it again. After several days of playing the song over and over, she naturally memorized the lyrics. One morning while getting ready for the day, she was singing the song quietlyFull Post

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March 8, 2019
Fight Temptation Like a Girl With a Sword

It was late and I was exhausted. My head hit the pillow and I was ready for a good night of sleep. I closed my eyes and exhaled. Ahhhh Finally some rest. But then it happened. My mind was suddenly assaulted with thoughts that came flooding in unannounced. Worry, fear, and anxiety gripped my heart as my mind wandered into various unsolved challenges I was facing in my life. I knew there was nothing I could do to solve any of those real-life problems right then. But the reality of the situations seemed overwhelming at the moment and everything in me wanted to obsessively think about it. I triedFull Post

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March 6, 2019
How We Found Godly Women to Mentor Us

WATCH VIDEO  Over the past few years, the two of us have come to realize (more than ever before) that life is not meant to be lived alone. God didn’t create us to fly solo. We desperately need wisdom and input from the wise people in our lives. The Bible makes it clear that we need to surround ourselves with wise people if we want to become wise. Proverbs 13:20 “Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm.” The Bible also makes it clear that life isn’t about making our name great. It’s about making God’s name great. We need wise input toFull Post

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March 4, 2019
Hope for the Christian Girl Suffering from a Chronic Illness

I didn’t want to miss this opportunity. Migraines had pulled me down one too many times and I wasn’t letting them have the upper hand on this day. I pulled myself out of the hotel bedroom. I walked towards the mirror. It didn’t look good. I grabbed my makeup case, loaded up the concealer, and lathered on a few extra coats of mascara. Extra mascara always helps me look less sick. There’s just something about dark lashes that makes one look alive. The clock was ticking. I needed to get out of the room. With my head literally pounding and my body feeling incredibly nauseous, I walked out ofFull Post

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March 1, 2019
Pursuing Friendships in the Wake of Rejection

“I gotta go straighten up, I’m having the girls over tonight,” she said as we got off the phone. I sat there with the phone pressed against my ear long after the call had ended. She was having her friends over and I wasn’t invited. Throughout life, each one of us has experienced exclusion. From classmates chatting excitedly about this weekend’s sleepover to friends planning get-togethers without you to coworkers talking excitedly about last night’s dinner in the break room. This particular conversation on the phone, however, stung more than usual. The woman on the other end of the call was my childhood best friend. Over the past fewFull Post

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February 27, 2019
God Made You Beautiful (no matter what other people say)

WATCH VLOG Beauty is one of the biggest issues that younger and older women wrestle with. It can make or break you depending on your perspective. We’ve personally had our own struggles with beauty over the years but found incredible freedom through God’s Word.  3 Truths that have personally transformed our view of beauty and how we view ourselves: God Designed Me, So He Defines My Worth. God Handcrafted Me to Look Just the Way I Do. I was Created for God’s Glory Psalm 139:13-15 “For you [God] formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.Full Post

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February 22, 2019
How I Found a Godly Woman to Mentor Me

I wanted to text her for several weeks but kept putting it off out of fear. What if she says no? What if she’s too busy? What if she just doesn’t want to do it? I knew my hesitations were rooted in the fear of rejection, so — before I could talk myself out of it again, I quickly started typing out a text message. After re-reading my message several times, I clicked send. I knew this was a good decision, and I reminded myself to trust in God for whatever happened. Asking an older, godly woman to mentor me was something I knew I needed to do. IFull Post

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February 15, 2019
Standing Firm When You Feel Unloved and Rejected

The waves of accusations crashing against my mind began something like this: No one loves you. You don’t have even one true friend who cares about you. You are unwanted; you always have been, and you always will be. The world would be better off if you were dead. The waves of this particular mental assault began about three weeks prior to a conference my ministry hosts for women. Every year we experience various attacks leading up to this event. I’m accustomed to the typical annoyances, such as cars breaking down, logistical setbacks, and random illnesses. But this summer, the battle was so sinister that I didn’t realize I was under attackFull Post

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February 13, 2019
Why Sexual Abuse is Never Okay

WATCH VIDEO  As we talk about sexual abuse, we want to first say that this issue is a huge and massive topic, therefore we cannot cover every important thing that needs to be said about this in one video. If you or someone you know has been a victim of sexual assault or abuse, we want to first say how deeply sorry we are. This is an awful and evil act that breaks our hearts and God’s heart. We are personally close to several people who have been victims of sexual abuse and it has been a long and challenging journey for each of these people. In this video,Full Post

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February 1, 2019
Why Confessing Your Sin Leads to Freedom and Joy

Last weekend, Zack and I had the opportunity to teach at our church’s high school retreat which proved to be a fruitful and sanctifying experience. After weeks of preparation, praying, and pouring our hearts into the sessions, we were so excited to finally teach them together. The retreat weekend arrived and we found ourselves rushing to get out of the door. Feeling frazzled, frustrated, and slightly annoyed at each other, we headed on our way. ⁣ As the hour-long car ride stretched on, our disagreements and frustrations only worsened. And here’s the ironic part. We were scheduled to teach our first session THAT night and it was literally onFull Post

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January 25, 2019
How I Overcame Anxiety and Worry in My Life

When I was single, I spent a lot of time wondering if I would ever get married. I thought about the future a lot. Sometimes my thoughts were filled with anxiety and worry, and other times they were resting peacefully in God’s sovereignty. My questions about marriage were eventually answered in 2011 when I walked down the aisle and married Zack Clark. Now that I was married, I didn’t have to wonder about that anymore. I remember going on my honeymoon and feeling blissfully free of all worries about the future. Life was great. Life was simple. There was nothing to be anxious about. At least not yet.  Full Post

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January 18, 2019
4 Easy-to-Miss Signs that You Struggle with Gossip 

As soon as I saw her text message, I instantly felt the twinge of guilt. This friend was following up with me about a conversation the two of us had shared earlier that day. We had been innocently chatting about a recent challenge in her life regarding a certain relationship. Without even realizing it, our conversation headed south and begin to borderline on gossip. The details we hashed out about that particular person went too far and were not necessary. So in this text message, my friend asked me to forgive her for gossiping about that particular friend. I knew I was guilty as well, so I asked herFull Post

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January 11, 2019
How to Pray Every Single Day

I’ve only met a handful of Christians in my entire life who’ve said that their prayer life is a daily, consistent, ongoing, and passionate habit in their life. Most Christians I talk to seem to fall more in line with my struggle of desiring to pray more faithfully but finding it hard to stay consistent. Prayer seems to be a big challenge for most of us. So, as I write this post, I am not coming to you like the prayer warrior that I long to be. I am not her. At least not yet. But I want to be. I desire more. And I know God wants forFull Post

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January 9, 2019
What We Do for Our Morning Quiet Time

WATCH VIDEO  Having a daily quiet time with the Lord is something each and every one of us should strive to do. Although it’s something we should all be doing, it can often be confusing to know what to do and how to do it. We often have questions like… What does “quiet time” even mean? How do I study the Bible? Should I read a book of the Bible? Should I work through the entire Bible each year? In today’s vlog, the two of us answer these questions and share with you what we are doing this year. WATCH VIDEO 

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January 4, 2019
How God Changed My Relationship with Makeup

I abruptly opened my eyes to the blaring sound of my alarm. As the blurriness began to subside, I slowly sat up and peered toward the window directly in front of me. It was a grey and overcast day in Chicago, but it was an exciting day nonetheless. My mom was asked to be a part of a show that highlights the benefits of incorporating raw fruits and vegetable into your diet. She was going as a testament to how raw foods have greatly improved her type 2 diabetes. My two sisters and I were also invited to come to the shoot to get some footage with our mom.Full Post

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December 24, 2018
5 Simple Goals for Christmas Day

Goal #1: Have a Joyful Attitude It’s so easy to get bent out of shape about silly things on Christmas Day. Instead of allowing those disappointments to dictate your actions and attitudes, choose to have a joyful attitude. Choose to be grateful instead of upset, and joy will be a natural overflow. Goal #2: Focus on Others  My day, my gifts, my traditions, my plans — my, my, my! It’s so easy to get bogged down with self-centered thoughts on Christmas Day. We all know that there is no true joy in living to please ourselves. Instead of focusing on your desires on Christmas day, look for ways toFull Post

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December 21, 2018
Christmas Countdown Bible Reading Plan

Christmas day is almost here which means many of us are scrambling to purchase last minute gift, wrap that final present, and run into that one other store. In the midst of the Christmas craziness and frenzied finale, I have an idea for you. An idea to calm your heart and bring true peace back into your busy life. Slow down and take some time — starting this weekend — to read the incredible story of our Savior’s birth.  Don’t get so caught up in the last minute rush that you forget to sit down, be still, and fill your heart with the true treasure of Christmas. And since we all needFull Post

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December 19, 2018
Trusting God When Life Takes an Unexpected Turn

WATCH VIDEO It’s easy to trust God when life is going our way. But what happens when life takes an unexpected turn? What happens when our circumstances and seasons of life take us down a road that is filled with questions and uncertainty? It’s during these times that trusting God wholeheartedly can be challenging. This is exactly where a young woman named Mary found herself. She was engaged to her soon-to-be husband, Joseph, and found her life taking an extremely unexpected turn. She was a woman just like you and me who had to choose to trust God in the midst of great uncertainty. If your life is taking some unexpected turns right now,Full Post

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December 17, 2018
2 Truths to Replace Self-Pity with Joy

Jennifer’s tears rolled down her cheeks as she struggled to express her thoughts. “I just don’t feel like God sees me or cares about me. He’s never answered a single one of my prayers and I never see Him working in my life. I don’t have many friends, my parents don’t give me the time of day, and my health is awful. I just can’t see any reason to live for God or praise Him. I honestly think He has forgotten about me.” The tears continued to fall and Jennifer seemed to be growing more depressed and discouraged as she thought about her life. From her perspective, life wasFull Post

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December 12, 2018
A Challenge: Make Someone’s Day this December!

WATCH VIDEO  It doesn’t take much to make someone’s day. Since the Christmas season is all about giving and blessing others, make it your goal to intentionally bless someone this month. To help you do that, we have a fun December challenge for you! Over the next few weeks, go out of your way to make someone else’s day by doing one of the following actions:  Give them a surprise Christmas Angel gift. 2. Pay for someone’s food/coffee order in a drive-thru. 3. Pray for someone and text them your prayer. 4. Do a random task or project for a family member or friend. 5. Write an encouraging noteFull Post

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December 5, 2018
How to Overcome Envy, Jealousy, & Selfishness

WATCH VIDEO A lot of you have been asking how to make Christmas more meaningful this year. Last week we talked about Advent and unpacked exactly what it is and how you can do an advent study this year.  How to do an Advent Study this Christmas In my (Bethany’s) Advent study, I was reading about a woman, in Luke 1, named Elizabeth. She is an incredible example of a woman who had every opportunity to display envy, jealousy, and selfishness in her life but didn’t. Instead, she chose the opposite. She responded selflessly.  Elizabeth’s godly character didn’t happen in an instant though. It was a life of walking humblyFull Post

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November 30, 2018
Before You Post that Sexy Workout Selfie

I’m guilty. I have totally done it. After a long hard workout, I remember snapping a “sexy” picture of myself in front of my bedroom mirror. You know. The kind where you angle your body just right to make your fat disappear and your muscles look huge. Yep. That was me. I wanted to see how hot I looked. I wanted to admire my body. Deep down, I was self-obsessed and I didn’t care. I was working out because I wanted to look good. I wanted people to admire my fit body. I wanted other girls to be secretly jealous of me. The trend of the sexy workout selfie. OnceFull Post

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November 21, 2018
The Hardest Things to Be Thankful For

WATCH VIDEO  The Holiday Season can be one of the happiest seasons for some of us and the most difficult seasons for others of us. Instead of allowing your circumstances to dictate your holidays, be intentional to cultivate gratitude. Be intentional to choose joy even in the midst of hardship. Be intentional to think of others even when you don’t feel like it. Here are three ways that you can begin to cultivate thankfulness during the holiday season.  1. Dwell in the Presence of the Lord 2. Give to Someone Else Who’s Hurting 3. Choose to Proactively love difficult people. WATCH VIDEO 

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November 12, 2018
5 Ways to Practice Hospitality as a Single Woman

As a newly married woman with my own space now, one of the things I can’t wait to do is show hospitality to others. As I unpack my many boxes, I’m imaging how fun it’s going to be to invite people into my new little apartment and serve them a good meal. I can’t wait to have my family, friends, and neighbors over for some southern sweet tea and good conversations. Here’s the thing though…as excited as I am about pursuing hospitality now, this isn’t a new practice for me. Pursuing hospitality is something I have enjoyed doing for many, many years, long before I ever got married. As aFull Post

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November 9, 2018
3 Truths for the Single Woman Longing for Marriage

I was talking to a friend recently who is single, in her mid-twenties, and regularly wondering if God has marriage in store for her future. As we chatted, she shared her struggles honestly from her heart. “It’s just so hard to keep my hope set on the Lord when I desire marriage so much. I just wish God would tell me if I’m ever going to get married or not. The unknown is so hard to endure!” As we talked, her honesty and openness reminded me of how I often felt during my single years as well. I desperately desired marriage. I wondered if my longings would ever beFull Post

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November 2, 2018
To the Girl Who Feels Hopeless

Feelings of hopelessness have been on the fringe of my life these past few years. As Zack and I have traveled down an unexpected road of recurrent miscarriage and infertility, I have felt the waves of hopelessness knock at the door of my heart many times (watch our story here). For many of us, unfulfilled longings can often be the biggest funnel toward hopelessness. As I’ve wrestled with my own unfulfilled longings, I’ve come to the realization that the way I choose to respond to my disappointments will take me down one of two paths: Either I will go down a path toward hopelessness, or I will choose toFull Post

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October 26, 2018
Our Story of Infertility and Where We Are Today

WATCH VIDEO Zack and Kristen open up about their 7-year journey of infertility and recurrent miscarriages. Despite their unfulfilled longings, they’re trusting that God is good and still has a plan in the midst of loss. WATCH VIDEO

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October 19, 2018
Are You Playing Footsie with Sexual Temptation?

His heart beat faster as he purposely walked down the dark street. It was nighttime, and nobody else was out. He knew she lived in this area. He was hoping she would come out to meet him. He glanced around to make sure no one saw him. He continued walking when she suddenly appeared in front of him. Without saying a word, she wrapped her arms around his neck and brazenly kissed him. “My husband is gone,” she said in a seductive whisper. “Come with me and let’s have our fill of love until the morning!” Like an ox being led to the slaughter, he immediately followed the seductressFull Post

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October 5, 2018
Becoming the Right Kind of Leader and Influencer

We’ve all experienced different kinds of leaders: some domineering, some soft-spoken, some daring, some methodical. So what do all leaders have in common? Influence. Whatever the personality or gifting, we are leaders if we are impacting others. But what about us as Christian women? How does leadership apply to us? Well, the Bible teaches that we are all commanded to lead as ambassadors of Christ. We are His representatives. Man or woman, we are to have an impact on others for the sake of the gospel. Now, some of us have had a horrible experience under sinful leadership. Satan has done his best to twist the truth about theFull Post

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September 21, 2018
God Made You Beautiful, Despite How Ugly You Feel

Her hair was long and beautiful. It was thick and luscious. As she highlighted my hair in the salon, I couldn’t help but compliment her hair. “I just love your hair!” I said enthusiastically. I expected her to accept my compliment with satisfaction, but she didn’t. “Oh…thanks!” she said laughing out loud. “It’s actually not my hair…well, at least not most of it.” I raised my eyebrows in surprise. “Yeah, it’s actually mostly hair extensions. My real hair is short and thin.” She said with a wink. She went on to explain how her salon offered high-quality fusion hair extension service. They would fuse real pieces of hair onto theFull Post

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September 19, 2018
Overcoming the Comparison Trap

WATCH VIDEO  When I, Bethany, was 19 years old, I was given a reliable old car to drive. Immediately I started comparing myself and my car to other girls with newer cars. Comparison left me feeling ungrateful and discontent.  Once I surrendered my need to measure up to others, I was able to enjoy the car that God had given to me.  In our modern day and age of technology, comparison is probably one of the biggest traps many of us find ourselves in. We compare our clothes, cars, wealth, grades, family, friends, makeup, hair, skin, features, height, weight and on and on. If we give into comparison, it willFull Post

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September 14, 2018
Christian Girl’s Guide for Managing Her Time Wisely

It’s constantly moving, always slipping away. There’s never enough of it, though sometimes there seems to be entirely too much of it. What is it? Time. Our Creator gifted us with this precious, temporary commodity. And He cares deeply about how we use it. “Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil.” Ephesians 5:15-16 “So teach us to number our days that we may get a heart of wisdom.” Psalm 90:12 When considering how to fill our calendars, remember that life is “a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes” (JamesFull Post

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August 31, 2018
3 Lies Porn Teaches Women About Their Sexuality

We live in a day and age when pornographic content is readily available with the click of a button. What used to be a hush-hush industry is turning into a booming mainstream business. Porn is no longer primarily targeted toward men either but is targeted at women, teens, and even children. The sad reality is, if you have any of the following devices, you’ve probably been (or will be) exposed to some form of porn: Social media accounts A phone with internet A TV in your room A laptop with internet access OR – you hang out with friends who have any of the above. As tantalizing as pornographyFull Post

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August 29, 2018
Standing Strong in the Face of Peer Pressure

WATCH VIDEO  Negative peer pressure…we’ve all been there. That moment when we feel like we MUST conform because we don’t want to stand out. We don’t want to be weird. We don’t want to look lame. The two of us have totally been there and we’re guessing you have too. So what does peer pressure look like? “Come on…just try a little beer, it’s not gonna kill you.” “Everyone is going to the party, don’t be a sissy.” “It’s okay to tell a white lie every now and then.” “Look, if you love your boyfriend, it’s okay to sleep with them.” The bottom line is this: We all giveFull Post

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August 17, 2018
Same-Sex Attraction and the Christian Girl

She experienced same-sex attraction for the first time when she was five years old. These feelings were a part of her life as long as she could remember. As she grew into a teenager the feelings only intensified. By age seventeen, she pursued her first female relationship and openly embraced her life as a lesbian. Then, at age nineteen something radical happened in her life. She was introduced to a man named Jesus. She had never known a love so powerful before. She had never experienced a love so intimate and satisfying. Over the next few years, Jesus transformed her life from the inside out. This is the trueFull Post

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July 20, 2018
Why Sexting Isn’t God’s Best for Single Women

“I just don’t know what to do!” she said to me, with a discouraged look on her face. “One of my friends is sending nude pictures to her boyfriend and I feel like I should say something to her. I don’t think it’s a good idea…but I’m just not sure what to say!” This is a real conversation I had with a teen girl after a Girl Defined church event. She was totally discouraged about her friend’s sexting habits but had no idea what to say to her friend. As much as I’d like to hide under a bushel and believe that sexting and nude-photo-sharing is rare, it’s not.Full Post

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July 6, 2018
Trusting Your Unknown Future to a Known God

“It’s just so hard to trust God with my future when I have no idea what’s going to happen,” she said in a discouraged tone. “I mean…I want to trust God, but it’s just really hard for me. What if I never get married?” I listened as my friend shared her heart with me. She was single and really struggling to trust God with her love life. She was in her late twenties and was wondering if marriage would ever become a reality. Trusting God with the unknowns of the future can be one of the hardest things to do. There’s so much uncertainty in the unknown. “What ifFull Post

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June 22, 2018
How to Initiate Friendships When You Feel Left Out and Forgotten

Have you ever been left out by a friend? Have you ever felt like a certain friend wasn’t reaching out to you enough? Unfortunately, when stuff like this happens, our natural tendency is to complain and whine about what the other person (or group of people) isn’t giving us. We complain that they aren’t loving us enough, caring about us enough, initiating conversation with us enough, etc. Instead of doing something about it, we sit back and throw ourselves an internal pity-party. I know, because I’ve done it many times. However, about eight years ago my entire perspective took a 180-degree turn. I learned one of the most valuableFull Post

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June 15, 2018
Unfiltered Beauty: Embracing Your Face Without a Filter

I angled the phone. Smiled. Clicked capture. My sister had just purchased a new smartphone, and I wanted to try out the camera. It had more filters and options than my own “next door to a dumb phone” device, which, of course, meant better selfies. I tried out every single filter, loving the results. I clicked an icon in the corner, which brought up three more options. The first was called “slim face.” Curious, I moved the bar all the way to the right and watched in awe as my face narrowed before my eyes. My cheeks hollowed until it looked like I was sucking on lemons. I laughed,Full Post

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June 8, 2018
Why Suicide is Never the Right Solution

The news of Kate Spade committing suicide broke my heart. The reality of suicide is a sobering and tragic act that leaves behind more questions than solutions. Most of us will never know the depth of personal struggles that Kate was facing, but we know that she was hurting. She felt hopeless. For her, the only solution that seemed right was to end her life. In the wake of her tragic suicide (and others like it), the media is never quite sure how to respond. It’s a confusing puzzle. Why would someone as beautiful and talented and successful as Kate want to end her life? From a billion dollarFull Post

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May 28, 2018
Five Ways to Draw Closer to God When He Feels Far Away

Written by: Lauren Palmer I was sitting at the table across from my best friends at our favorite coffee shop. I hadn’t seen my friends for a while, so we spent some time catching up on all the news going on in our lives. I wanted to have a good time with my friends, but for some reason, I just wasn’t enjoying myself. I felt empty. In that moment –it dawned on me. I felt empty and alone, despite being surrounded by my friends, because I hadn’t been nurturing the relationship that is the most important: my relationship with God. I’m sure I’m not the only one who has felt likeFull Post

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May 9, 2018
Sex and the Single Girl with Dr. Juli Slattery

WATCH THE VIDEO  Have you ever wondered things like, why does my sexuality matter to God? Or, can I be single and sexual? Or, what should I do with my sexual temptations? If so, you’re going to love today’s video! We had the opportunity to chat with Dr. Juli Slattery who is an expert on all topics regarding our sexuality. Without shying away from the “hard” questions, Dr. Slattery does an amazing job of presenting truth in a completely relevant, yet totally tasteful way. She is an amazing Christian woman who is passionate about equipping modern women with God’s vision for sexual intimacy and sexual design.  She says, “The average single Christian hasFull Post

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April 2, 2018
When God Doesn’t Give You What You Prayed For

I was desperate. With tears flowing down my face, I held my limp little puppy in my arms. This puppy had only been mine for 4 days. Addie was sweet and energetic and had the cutest little eyes. I was already deeply bonded with her. Even though she was just a dog, she came into my life after a hard season of two miscarriages. Having something small and little to care for was helpful for me. I had never owned a dog before, so this was a new experience. I was honestly shocked at how instantly attached and in-love one can become with their animal. I was also surprisedFull Post

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March 2, 2018
Are You a Lady Wisdom or a Madame Folly?

What if you lived your whole life thinking you were a smart and empowered woman only to get to Heaven and discover you were actually quite foolish? Thoughts like these stop me in my tracks all the time. They scare me. The thought of spending my whole life striving after what I believed to be right, only to find out I was wrong, is a sobering and tragic thought. We live in a day and age where examining our motives, character, actions, and thoughts isn’t something we’re encouraged to do. Instead, we’re encouraged to be “empowered” in the things that make us feel good. The things that make usFull Post

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January 26, 2018
Responding to Authority in a God-Honoring Way

We didn’t agree. There was tension. They couldn’t see things my way and I couldn’t see things their way. With my voice cracking and tears of frustration pouring down my face, I stomped back to my room. Say hello to my sixteen-year-old self, struggling with authority. Growing up, my parents and I always had a great relationship. But even great relationships don’t escape conflict. There were several occasions where my parent’s and I strongly disagreed about something. I was sure my way was better. In my anger, I would often respond to them in frustration, tears, and disrespect. A few hours would go by, then I would always feelFull Post

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January 24, 2018
Living to Be Liked vs. Living to Please God

WATCH VIDEO  Back in high school the two of us were desperately trying to maintain our “cool” teen girl image. In an attempt to hold onto our coolness, we would make our parents park our family’s big 12 passenger van as far out of sight as possible. We couldn’t risk losing our “cool” reputation and becoming “disliked” by our friends. When we, as young women, live to be liked and live for the approval of others, we enslave ourselves to the opinions of others. Instead of living to be liked, the two of us want to show you a much better, more joy-filled, and freeing way to live. WATCHFull Post

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January 19, 2018
How Comparison Can Become Poison to Your Soul

It was already late in the evening when I found myself sitting in front of my laptop googling beauty tips: How can I put on my makeup in a way that conceals my trapezoidal face? What haircut would suit me best? Is there a secret to clear skin? Well, I’m the girl who always changes her hair color, the one who sleeps with coconut oil in her hair (my hair really seems healthier these days, I’m not kidding!), and tries out cosmetic products when friends tell her about how effective they are. It always takes place in the same way. At first, I’m very excited and hopeful that theFull Post

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December 22, 2017
Slow Down, Be Still, and Cherish Christ this Weekend

You’ve got to be kidding me! I thought. This is absolutely crazy. With my basket full of Christmas presents, I navigated my cart to the back of the insanely long checkout line. There had to be at least 30 people in front of me. I scanned the contents of various baskets as I passed by. Yep. They’re here doing the same thing. I thought. Why didn’t I plan better?! Everyone knows that last minute Christmas shopping at a really popular store is pretty much the worst idea ever. And here I was. Waiting in line at the store. Basket-to-basket with all the last minute shoppers. Frustration stirred inside of me.Full Post

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December 15, 2017
12 Unusual Christmas Wishes for Every Christian Girl

I don’t know about you, but the Christmas season has a way of bringing out my best and worst. In the midst of a joyous party with family, I have find myself consumed with self-centered thoughts. Rather than focusing on the true Reason for the season…I subtly begin to view myself as the reason for the season. Everything is about my happiness and joy, right? Wrong. While wish lists, Christmas parties, and traditions are all fine and fun, I am realizing this year (more than ever before) that my heart needs a focus shift. My “wish list” needs a makeover. Instead of focusing on my desires and my wishes and my traditions this season, I am strivingFull Post

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December 13, 2017
What to do When All I Want for Christmas is a Boyfriend

WATCH VIDEO  It’s that time of year again. The radio is playing love songs. The movies portray nothing but perfect romance stories. And all of your friends seem to be “falling in love.” Christmas can be hard when it feels like cupid’s arrows are hitting everyone but you. Hot chocolate, Christmas carols, and warm fires just seem to pale in comparison to true love. And then that song comes on and taunts you with its words… “all I want for Christmas is you.“ If this December finds you thinking thoughts like, “all I want for Christmas is a boyfriend!” then today’s video was made just for you. Instead of strugglingFull Post

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December 8, 2017
Becoming a Woman Who Sees Her Need for Jesus

I sat there staring at the screen as a wave of guilt and gratitude rushed over me. My heart was stirred by what I saw. These poor and desperate people longed for Jesus. They wanted Him. They waited for Him. They rejoiced when they finally saw Him. After a few seconds, Zack broke the silence. “Well, what did you think, babe?” he asked. We had just finished watching the first episode of a new and upcoming series called The Chosen. This new show is about the life of Christ through the eyes of the sinners who knew him best. The pilot episode was about Jesus’ birth, shown from theFull Post

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December 1, 2017
12 Days of Christmas with Girl Defined

I would never, ever think of myself as a Christmas Grinch. I love the Christmas season so much! I play Christmas music 24/7. I embrace gift giving wholeheartedly. I love the seasonal coffee drinks. I’m nothing like the Grinch. Or so I thought. With Christmas music playing in the background of my house, a shocking reality hit me recently. Deep down — way beneath the surface of my holiday smile — I have a lot of Grinch-like tendencies. Although the Grinch is portrayed as someone who despises Christmas, that’s not his true issue.  His real heart issue is that he loves himself more than anyone else. He is selfish and self-centered. He is consumed withFull Post

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November 17, 2017
Fighting Lust with the Power of Gratitude

When I was a teen girl, I remember having moments where I viewed God’s boundaries for sexual purity as a bit…well — annoying. Striving for purity in my heart and mind wasn’t easy, and I struggled to keep my thoughts pure. I would find myself grumbling in my heart about how tough the single life was. Why would God give me all of these sexual desires as a single woman? What if I never get married? Then what?! How am I supposed to honor God when it’s so hard? Deep down, I knew God’s design for purity was good. I knew sexual intimacy was reserved for marriage alone, butFull Post

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November 1, 2017
The Modern Woman’s Struggle with Sexual Sin

WATCH VIDEO  Sexual sin has often received the label of being a “male problem.” However, lust isn’t a male problem — it’s a human problem, and women are desperately struggling too. If you struggle to be open and honest about your own sexual sin,  see if any of these lies are at the root of your struggle: 1. I’m the only female who struggles with sexual sin and temptation. 2. Sexual sin is supposed to be a “guy issue,” so I must be weird. 3. My family and friends would be shocked if they knew what I struggled with. 4. Everybody views me as the “good Christian girl” soFull Post

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September 29, 2017
6 Ways to Make Your Journaling More Meaningful

I love journaling. In fact, I started journaling when I was 12 years old and didn’t miss a single day until I got married. That means I journaled for 12 years straight – every single day. I journaled everything and anything. I wrote about my most intimate thoughts, to what I did that day, to who my latest crush was. Shortly after I married Zack, I thought it would be fun to look back through my journals with him and read all of the entries that he was mentioned in. I traced it back to the year 2006, when I first met him as a teenage girl. Reading thoseFull Post

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September 25, 2017
How I Overcame Being Shy, Selfish, and Seriously Awkward

I was 15 years old, had a mouth full of braces and was desperately shy and awkward. Our whole family was involved in the AWANA program at our church and I had just started attending the high school program. The first week came and I sat by myself. I walked to game time by myself. I left by myself. The next week, the same thing happened. This went on for several months. I hated going. I hated feeling shy and uncomfortable. I hated not having any friends and feeling desperately alone. After several more weeks, I thought up a “brilliant” plan. Since, there was no getting out of going,Full Post

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September 15, 2017
5 Reasons Girls Aren’t Honest About their Sexual Struggles

Being honest about my past struggles with sexual sin and masturbation wasn’t easy. In fact, I didn’t want to be honest about it. I didn’t want to confess it. I wanted to shove those sins into the deepest darkest corner never to be seen again. But I knew that wouldn’t work. Sin always has a way of making its way to the light. As a “good christian girl,” I felt so ashamed and embarrassed inside that I struggled with lust. I was positive that I was the only Christian girl in the entire world who struggled with masturbation. Sexual sins like that were supposed to be guy issues…not girlFull Post

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August 11, 2017
4 Verses to Help Christian Girls Conquer Temptation

I’m married to an amazingly godly and kind man. But like any human, Zack might occasionally say something or do something that I don’t view as particularly “sweet and thoughtful.” Instead of giving him the benefit of the doubt, my natural tendency is to assume the worst. Instead of lovingly asking him about it, I often cater to my sinful frustration. This happened recently. I felt the temptation of anger come on me. Instead of resisting it, I allowed my emotions to overtake me. I allowed my feelings to rule my thinking. Once again I found myself giving into temptation. Several hours went by of me pouting and grumbling in myFull Post

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July 21, 2017
Choosing to Pursue Radical Purity in Your Own Life

Talking about God’s radical design for love, sex, and purity with 400 girls and women isn’t a normal occurrence in this day and age. But that’s exactly what happened this past weekend at the Radical Purity Conference in San Antonio, TX. We courageously, unashamedly, and tactfully unpacked God’s good plan for our sexuality as women. We talked openly about some of the not-so-often-talked-about areas, and allowed God’s Word to shed light and truth into these relevant topics. We asked the hard questions, and looked into God’s Word for solid answers. We quickly discovered that God’s design for purity is radical. It’s completely counter-cultural. It’s unlike anything you see inFull Post

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July 12, 2017
Be a Girl Who Lives with Vision, Passion, and Purpose

When Kristen and I launched our very first blog (long before GirlDefined existed) we didn’t have a very clear plan of what we were doing. Due to our serious lack of vision for the blog, it didn’t take long for our interests to diminish. Let’s just say that our original blog didn’t last very long. Through that experience, the two of us realized our serious need for vision, passion, and purpose. Once the two of us established our vision for GirlDefined, that drove our passion, which in turn fueled our purpose on a daily basis. We want to challenge you to be a girl who lives with a visionFull Post

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June 23, 2017
How to Get Your Spiritual Life Out of the Drive-Thru Lane

Another day was over and I had done it again. With sleepy eyes, I reached for the lamp on my nightstand and turned off the light. I fell asleep to the familiar feelings of guilt and regret. I had intended to spend some quality time with God that morning. I had pulled my Bible out and found a nice comfy spot to sit on the couch. I intentionally made coffee ahead of time…so I already had that in hand. I even set an alarm to remind me to get started. So what in the world happened?   Sadly, what happened this morning was what happened to me many mornings.Full Post

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June 9, 2017
Modern Female Heroes Needed for Battle

The guard slapped her across the face and yelled, “keep moving!” Her tiny frame and malnourished figure stumbled forward. On the brinks of starvation and freezing to death, she was doing everything possible to simply survive. Ripped away from her family and friends, she had nothing left but her faith. The days and months wore on as Corrie Ten Boom endured the horrendous evil inside a Nazi concentration camp. She was in the midst of a monstrous battle. As the days and weeks wore on, she watched her precious sister die from sickness. Fighting the rage of anger inside her heart, Corrie knew that there was only one weaponFull Post

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April 14, 2017
Jesus Died So We Could Be Freed from Our Secret Sins

After months of pure misery, Natasha couldn’t keep the secrets to herself any longer. They were tearing her life apart piece by piece. Every secret she kept only made it harder for her to reveal what was really going on in her life. Natasha was a friend of mine. She called me one night on the phone and couldn’t hold back the tears as she shared what had been going on. She had been secretly watching online porn and engaging in sexual conversations with several different guys. She was so ashamed and embarrassed. She could barely speak the words. “I just need to tell someone! I don’t want to live like thisFull Post

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March 24, 2017
Why Becoming Famous and Hot Shouldn’t be Our Goal

She was a nobody. Outside of her small circle of friends, the world didn’t even know she existed. As a music lover, she would sing songs in her room late into the night. She dreamed of becoming a famous singer. But as it was, Nashville didn’t even know she existed. Then one day, everything changed. She decided to post a few of her videos on Youtube. Little did she know what would happen next. She knew her voice was pretty good…but she had no idea how much talent she truly possessed. Within 24 hours her videos went viral. After 10 million views, she got a call from a majorFull Post

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March 6, 2017
How to Spot and Get Rid of Idols in Your Life

Ashley had grown to dread hanging out with her friends. She hated the thoughts that flooded her mind every time she met up with them. What if they don’t like my hair? What if they think my outfit looks stupid? What if they don’t get my jokes? On and on the thoughts continued. Ashley tried her best to curl her hair perfectly, paint her nails just right and wear the cutest outfits, but nothing seemed to work. Ashley’s desperate desire to be completely loved and accepted by her friends was turning her into a sad and depressed young lady. Ashley thought that if she could only gain the constantFull Post

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March 3, 2017
Emma’s Story: Opening Up About Past Sin Changed Her Life

I leaned my weight against the bathroom sink trying not to throw up. My heart was thumping so loud that my scarf was thumping up and down. I was doing all I could to keep from crying. My heart kept pounding. It felt like someone had stuck a wooden spoon inside my stomach and was stirring my insides around. I took a deep breath. Looking in the mirror, I told myself I didn’t want to do this. I had been on this mission trip for a month. I had heard each of my teammates admit to sin in their pasts when they gave their personal testimonies. But it wasFull Post

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February 26, 2017
Finding Freedom from Your Addiction to Porn

I recently read about a girl who was strolling through a local grocery store, when she felt a sudden and overwhelming urge for a chocolate candy bar. The urge became so powerful that she forgot what she was doing and headed straight for the candy aisle. She searched the options wondering which one she should choose. She spotted one she had never seen before. The label pulled at her desire with words like “Great new taste!” “Satisfaction guaranteed!” “No more hunger cravings!” The girl grabbed the candy bar and started savoring the first bite. Her entire being was enraptured in the moment. She loved the way the candy made her feel.Full Post

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January 8, 2017
Learning to Trust God When the Situation Seems Impossible

Let’s fly back in time to October of 2014. I remember it like it was yesterday. Kristen and I were standing in a hotel Starbucks waiting to meet the one and only Erin Davis. (She’s the amazing gal who runs the LYWB Blog). I’d been interacting with Erin for several years via email but had never met her in person. I was so excited to finally meet face to face and have the opportunity to pick Erin’s brain about blogging, book writing, and getting published. In my mind, she was (and still is) the pro. I was (and still feel like) the newbie who was hoping to glean any wisdomFull Post

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December 16, 2016
3 of the Most Popular Places to Misplace Your Identity

“Meet Laura Van Ryn and Whitney Cerak: one buried under the wrong name, one in a coma and being cared for by the wrong family.” Those were some of the first words I read in a gripping book called, Mistaken Identity. This true and shocking story made national news when it was discovered that the identity of two college girls was accidentally swapped after a tragic bus accident. One girl died and was accidentally buried under the identity of her friend, who was in critical condition. After weeks of mourning the death of their daughter, the family was shocked to discover that it wasn’t their daughter they had buried,Full Post

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November 22, 2016
The Quickest Way to Ruin Your Holidays

WATCH VIDEO  The holiday season is supposed to be the happiest, most joyful, and celebratory time of the year, right? Unfortunately, there have been times in the two of our lives where the holidays have been some of the most miserable. Looking back on those “miserable” holidays, we realize exactly where we went wrong. High Expectations.  Self-Centered Attitudes. Lot’s of Complaints.  We really want to help you avoid ruining your holiday season by getting rid of these three attitudes. We truly believe that the holidays can be some of the happiest and most joyful times of the year if you have a proper heart attitude and focus. WATCH VIDEO       

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November 20, 2016
Two Simple Truths that will Radically Change Your Heart and Attitude

Jennifer’s tears rolled down her cheeks as she struggled to express her thoughts. “I just don’t feel like God sees me or cares about me. He’s never answered a single one of my prayers and I never see Him working in my life. I don’t have many friends, my parents don’t give me the time of day, and my health is awful. I just can’t see any reason to live for God or praise Him. I honestly think He has forgotten about me.” The tears continued to fall and Jennifer seemed to be growing more depressed and discouraged as she thought about her life. From her perspective, life wasFull Post

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September 30, 2016
Is Masturbation Wrong for Christian Girls? (Part 1)

Caution: This topic may not be appropriate for younger audiences. Without being unnecessarily graphic, my hope in writing this two part series is to offer helpful biblical counsel for the many Christian girls who are struggling in this area. It used to be that most blogs and books dealing with sexual sin issues were geared towards men. However, over the past few years many women have opened up about their own sexual sin struggles, expressing a need for help in this area as well. Praise the Lord! We, as women, are not immune to lustful sins any more than men are. Lust is not a guy problem…it’s a humanFull Post

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August 19, 2016
How to Snap Out of it When You Feel Totally Down

I went through a challenging time in my life once and had a great temptation to turn to “stuff” (shopping, food, mochas, novels, etc.) to make myself feel good in the moment. Instead of handling my sad emotions in the right way by turning to God’s word, I tried to cover them up by shopping and buying fun stuff for myself. Thankfully, at just the right time, I ran across a great podcast by Nancy Leigh DeMoss. She gave am awesome piece of advice that I found extremely helpful during my time of temptation. She told a story about how she was in a down mood and didn’t feelFull Post

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August 10, 2016
5 Powerful Truths for Overcoming Secret Sins (VIDEO)

WATCH VIDEO It is absolutely impossible to experience lasting freedom if we have ongoing, secret sin in our lives. This vlog will show you how to get rid of secret sin. WATCH VIDEO

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August 3, 2016
5 Quick Tips to Having an Awesome Quiet Time

WATCH VIDEO Personal devotions can be hard. It’s hard to know what to study. It’s hard to feel motivated when you don’t know what to do. This video will give you 5 quick tips on how to get started. WATCH VIDEO

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July 22, 2016
3 Practical Tips for Conquering Secret Sexual Thoughts

“I struggle with lustful thoughts all the time and I wish I could stop!” “I thought my sexuality was supposed to be a blessing…but I can’t seem to keep my mind pure! It doesn’t feel like a blessing anymore.” “Being single is a lot harder than I thought it would be! I battle against my sensual thoughts every night and it’s getting really old. Help!” Have you every has similar thoughts? Sexual thoughts and struggles are something that every Christian girl will battle at one time or another. Unfortunately, unlike most other struggles, this is one that can easily be kept under wraps. Many girls who struggle against lust keep it completelyFull Post

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July 20, 2016
How to Be Content When Your Heart’s Desire is Unfulfilled

WATCH VIDEO   Each one of us have those “If I only had” moments…  “If I only had ___________, then I’d be happy.” “If only I were married, then I’d be happy.” “If only I had a baby, then I’d be happy.” “If only I had a nicer car, then I’d be happy.” “If only I could buy more clothes, then I’d be happy.” Nobody’s life is perfect. We all have unfulfilled longings in our heart.  However, the two of us have learned (and continue to learn) how to be content even when our heart’s desire is unfulfilled. We pray that this vlog encourages you to find true contentment inFull Post

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July 11, 2016
What God Taught Me the Day I Almost Died

It was a hot summer day and I was doing the normal thing a kid would do. Swim! I was having a blast in the large pool with my family unaware of what was about to happen. I decided to take a dive under the large floating tube that my mom was sitting on. I gracefully swam underneath her and came up on the other side to take a breath…or so I thought. As I tried to surface for air, I felt my head hit something large instead. I was underneath the tube, not on the other side. I dove back down to escape the tube, but felt somethingFull Post

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July 8, 2016
When Wanting to be Accepted Turns Into an Obsession

It was a hot summer afternoon, deep in the heart of Texas. I was twenty-one years old and extremely self-conscious about looking good in front of other people. I would do almost anything to impress others. I  wanted to be liked. So imagine how I felt about driving a car as old as I was. Yeah, I wasn’t super thrilled about the idea. But the car was free (given to me by my grandparents), and it was in great working order. It was practical and got me where I needed to go. Even so, I was extremely self-conscious about driving it. When I would go hang out with myFull Post

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July 4, 2016
Why Being an Independent Woman Isn’t Always Good

“Hey honey, I really think we should go talk about this some more,” Zack said in a serious tone. We had just finished having a rather intense discussion about something that we didn’t see eye-to-eye on (at all). My emotions were completely driving the train and I was “done” discussing it. I crossed my arms like a child throwing a fit and looked up at him with a frustrated look.   “Babe, come on.” He said in a firm, but loving tone. “Let’s go finish this conversation. We need to.” He gestured for me to join him on the couch. I could feel my independent spirit rising up fromFull Post

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June 27, 2016
3 Signs You Love Looking at Yourself a Little Too Much

This mirror was like a magnet for my eyes. Every time I walked past this particular mirror in my house I looked into it. Without even realizing it, I had made it a habit to “check myself out” every time I walked by. Before I knew it, I was “checking myself out” every time I walked past any mirror. This subtle habit was rudely awakened one day during a construction project in my house. My favorite mirror had been removed from it’s normal place…but out of habit, I still looked in that same spot every time I walked by it. Instead of catching eyes with myself, a blank whiteFull Post

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June 20, 2016
15 Fun Ideas to Help You Deepen Your Relationships

Ever since Zack and I got married (5 years ago!), we have always made it a huge priority to have a special date night once a week. To keep things interesting, we’ve always taken turns planning the activity. We decided that he would plan the first and third Friday nights of the month, and I would plan the second and fourth. After several months of planning my turn for date nights, I was running low on new and exciting ideas. I had exhausted my internet research and couldn’t find anything new. There were some great Christian movies out, so I decided to rent one and keep the date night relaxing and simple.Full Post

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June 8, 2016
Strong Girls Obey God’s Word Even When it’s Hard | Vlog

WATCH VLOG If you want to be a strong girl, you must learn to obey God’s Word even when you don’t feel like it. We can’t be wimpy girls when it comes to honoring Christ with our lives. Way too many of us have given up on God’s truths when it’s hard or takes sacrifice. We’ve given into peer pressure, allowed the culture to shape our views, and have followed our emotions. We pray you will join the ranks of (truly) strong girls in today’s culture! We want to leave you with this question: What tough circumstances are you facing today that require you to be a strong girl forFull Post

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April 6, 2016
How My Selfishness in Marriage Ruined My Satisfaction

My husband and I recently celebrated two years of marriage. Yes, that’s not a long time compared to some, however God has taught me a lot. Let me just say this upfront – life doesn’t get easier when you get married. I’m sorry single friends…life doesn’t magically get easier with a man by your side (even if he’s amazing). After marriage, I realized how truly selfish and sinful I can be. I used to think it was extremely odd when I heard about people divorcing after two years. Then I got married and realized how selfishness can easily lead down a devastating road. As I allowed “my personal rights”Full Post

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March 14, 2016
God’s Truth Helped Me Overcome Suicidal Thoughts

Three months ago I almost took my life. I didn’t like anything about my life. I felt the best thing to do would be to leave. Thankfully, by God’s grace, some friends spoke biblical truth to me, and I am still here today. My life, just like everybody else’s, is hard. I find myself wanting things to go my way and I don’t care if anyone gets hurt in the process. I’ve lost friend after friend and have cut myself just to deal with the pain. No matter what I did, nothing would get rid of the pain. I kept trying to find something to distract myself. I’d runFull Post

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February 24, 2016
How to Study Your Bible and Love it!

I’ve had so many Christian girls ask me this simple question, “How do I study my Bible?!” They’re not wanting to know how to read their Bible, they’re wanting to know how to dig in and study it. And they’re wondering if there’s a way to do it and LOVE it. The answer is YES! You can learn how to study your Bible and absolutely love it in the process! I’m going to teach you how to do that right now. But first, this question; why would a Christian girl need to “study” her Bible? Why does this even matter? Well, if you want to know what’s true, knowFull Post

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January 24, 2016
8 Strategies to Help You Fight for Purity

Let’s be real. Maintaining purity in our modern culture is not an easy thing to do. Unless we as Christian girls are vigilant in fighting for purity from the inside out, we will fail. We will give into temptation. We will succumb to our sinful hearts. We (me included) desperately need Jesus and we desperately need His strength to help us focus on truth and resist temptation. I soooo want to fight for purity and I pray each and every one of you do as well. My hope and prayer is that this blog post will challenge, encourage, and give you the tools you need to continue your fightFull Post

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December 23, 2015
What a Scandalous Teenage Pregnancy Taught Me About God

She was the good girl. Everybody knew it. She had a great reputation with her family and friends. She was respected and held up as a great example for younger girls to look up to. Then, the unimaginable happened. After visiting some relatives in a far away city, she arrived back home with some unexpected news. Some shocking news. She was pregnant. Just imagine the rumors and gossip that spread like wildfire across her town. “SHE is pregnant?!” “How could SHE, the purest girl of all, get pregnant?!” “Who’s the father…?” “Why would SHE do this?!” Shock. Scandal. Sin. I’m sure those were the feelings and thoughts that many ofFull Post

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December 9, 2015
How Would You Respond if Your Wedding Got Canceled?

“With a sorrowful heart and deep pain, I must announce that my wedding has been canceled.” Those were the shocking words I read on my soon-to-be-married friend’s Facebook status. What was going on?! I went to her wedding shower less than a week before I read this post…and her actual wedding day was scheduled to take place in three weeks! How could this be possible? Was this a joke? I immediately pulled out my phone and contacted this girl friend of mine. She informed me that the message was true and that her fiance had called of the wedding and the engagement. Everything was over. Her heart was filledFull Post

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December 4, 2015
How to Handle Your Sexual Desires as a Single Girl

I may be married now, but I was single for 24 years and I know exactly what it’s like to have unfulfilled sexual desires. In fact, I have a really embarrassing story to confess to you. When I was a young teenager, I thought it would be a good idea to “practice” kissing before I met my husband. So…I “practiced” by smooching a designated kissing spot on my wall inside my closet. Since I wasn’t going to kiss a real guy until marriage, I thought a little practice wouldn’t hurt. Yeah…awkward. I know. Not to mention it didn’t really help. I share that embarrassing story with you to showFull Post

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November 30, 2015
The Quickest Way to Become an Unattractive Girl

Have you ever met someone and thought they were really attractive at first glance, but the more you got to know them the less attractive they appeared? What happened? Their physical looks didn’t change…what changed was the “revealing” of their true character. The more you got to know them, the more their true self shined through and the less attractive they appeared. Our culture trains us to believe that outward beauty is the only beauty worth chasing after. Yet,  how ironic that a highly attractive person can suddenly become “ugly” in our eyes if they’re mean, rude, angry, and self-focused. Who would you rather spend the rest of yourFull Post

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October 12, 2015
What to do When Life Doesn’t Serve You What You Feel Like Eating

The day was miserably hot. The sun glared through my window, and everything outside seemed to be dancing in a ripple of heat waves.   It was definitely summer, and it was here in full force. I looked down at the dried inmates of my once thriving window box. The marigolds were nothing but brown stalks sticking their heads sadly out of the ground. The dirt was dry and cracked, and everything seemed to be completely hopeless. But then I noticed one plant that didn’t resemble the rest.   It was a stem with two or three green leaves still clinging to it, and from the stem, in allFull Post

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October 9, 2015
Can the Bible Help with Depression, Eating Disorders, and Porn Addictions?

Jenna was your average high school girl. From the outside, she seemed happy and excited about life. What most people didn’t know about Jenna, was that her doctor diagnosed her with depression. Jenna has been taking antidepressants for over a year now and seeing a counselor on a weekly basis. Deep down, she sees very little improvement in her life. She feels hopeless and lost on the inside.  Melanie is similar to Jenna, only she’s in college. She’s cute, skinny and all the guys seem to like her. From the outside she’s the girl that all the other girls are jealous of.  What nobody knows though, is that MelanieFull Post

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September 28, 2015
How I Found Purpose During My Boring Teenage Years

It was another typical Monday morning and I was not looking forward to waking up early. The alarm went off and I was dreading the start of another day. Life was just not that exciting. In fact, it felt a little boring. As a 16 year old girl life is very much the same old, same old. Lot’s of school, cooking, cleaning, spending time with family, and trying to figure out what I want to do when I grow up. I really don’t have a schedule full of exciting adventures or thrilling opportunities. Because of my “same old, same old” schedule, I’ve struggled to believe that my life mattersFull Post

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September 23, 2015
Having Courage When the Bathing Suit is Way Too Small

My eyes grew twice the size as I watched my swim coach pull my new bathing suit from the box. “Ummm are you sure that’s her bathing suit? It looks a little small.” My mom asked with a questioning voice. My swim coach chuckled a little and then replied, “I’m positive this is her bathing suit. We order them extra small so that they will fit tight. We don’t want anything slowing her down when she’s in the water.” With hesitation my mom paid for the swimsuit and then handed it to me. I was only ten years old when this bathing suit fiasco went down, but I rememberFull Post

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September 21, 2015
6 Signs You’re Looking for Happiness in the Wrong Places

Have you ever rolled out of bed and thought, “I hope I have a terrible day today?” Probably not. I never have. Not many people have. Why? Because we all want to be happy. We all want to have great days. We live in a world where happiness is the end goal of almost every person’s life. Everyone wants to be happy. Everybody is searching, hoping, and longing to find that “one thing” that will make them permanently happy. Sadly, very few people find lasting, permanent happiness. That’s why many famous, rich celebrities bounce from relationship to relationship, mansion to mansion, car to car…they’re hoping the “next thing” willFull Post

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September 16, 2015
Porn: What Every Christian Girl Needs to Know

If you’ve believed the lie that pornography is something hidden in the deepest corners of the internet, you’ve been duped. Whether you’ve been exposed to porn or not, you have probably already gone through years of soft porn grooming without even realizing it. If you’re like I was, you probably think of porn as being some form of intense adult content only targeted at men…but it’s not. Listen carefully to how the dictionary describes porn: “Sexually explicit videos, photographs, writings, or the like, produced to elicit sexual arousal.” Did you catch that last part? “Produced to elicit sexual arousal.” How many mainstream movies, songs, books, TV shows, and magazinesFull Post

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September 9, 2015
5 Tips to Help You Strengthen Your Bible Time

“I just love my personal devotion time. I get in my closet, fall on my knees, and praise the Lord. I treasure that time with Him. Me and God all alone. It’s the best part of my day. I couldn’t survive without it.” As this sweet, older woman shared her heart about her personal devotions, I stood there wondering why I felt like she was speaking a foreign language. I was sixteen years old. I had been a Christian for many years, memorized tons of Scripture, and read my Bible on a daily basis. Despite these “Christian credentials,” my personal devotions felt nothing like this sweet lady’s description ofFull Post

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August 26, 2015
Smart Girls Predetermine to Follow God no Matter How Difficult

A life changing decision needed to be made and I was the only person who could make the final call. Deep in my heart I knew there were only two options: God’s way or my own way. I remember sitting with my Bible open to the book of Proverbs trying to fill my mind with Biblical insight. The more I read the more confirmed the answer became. There was a problem though. I didn’t like the truth. Choosing to accept the insight and wisdom I was gleaning from the Bible meant I had to make a really hard decision. One I wasn’t interested in making. Although I was veryFull Post

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August 24, 2015
5 Ways to Beat Back-to-School Temptations

The summer is almost over which means the beginning of the new school year is lurking right around the corner. You can tell it’s the end of summer because every store is advertising their back-to-school gear and accessories. For some of you this is an exciting time of new beginnings and a fresh start. For others, it’s a dreaded time of tests, peer pressure, and waking up at the crack of dawn. Whatever your school year may look like, there’s one thing it has in common with everyone else’s – a little thing called sneaky temptations. The buzz of a new school year is always accompanied by a buzzFull Post

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August 5, 2015
What to do When “Loving Your Selfie” is all the Rage

“You have got to be kidding me?!” I said to Bethany in a mildly shocked tone as she showed me a photo on her phone. “Did you really see that shirt in the store?” “Oh, yeah,” she replied while raising her eyebrows and smirking. “Welcome to the twenty-first century!” A popular store in town was selling a t-shirt with bold words on the front that said, “I Heart My Selfie.” I immediately did some research online to see if this “trend” was actually popular. To my astonishment, I found an entire line of “selfie” products. You can purchase any of the following items with the words “I Heart MyFull Post

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July 27, 2015
When Guys Become More Exciting Than God

“He just texted me again!” Abby said with a girlish squeal. She and her two sisters were hanging out in her bedroom chatting about guy stuff. Abby was nineteen years old and secretly hoping that Clay was “the one.” She woke up every morning wondering if he had texted her. If he hadn’t texted her, she would instantly think, “I wonder if he’ll text me today!” Or “Should I shoot him a text?” Or “Should I try and casually sit by him when we hang out in groups?” Or “Maybe I should suggest going on a date…?” Thoughts like these consumed her mind morning until night for several months.Full Post

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July 24, 2015
How I Handled the Hardest Day of My Entire Life

I sat there in the hospital room holding my dying baby brother in my arms. Prior to this moment in time I was a happy, outgoing, carefree 16 year old girl. Everything in my life seemed perfect…until I got the dreaded phone call. I was on my way home from a week long summer camp and was laughing over the weeks memories with my friends in the car. My mom was 8 months pregnant and from my perspective seemed to be doing great. Little did I know that tragedy struck home while I was away. “Mom’s in the hospital. The doctor says something is terribly wrong with the baby. TheyFull Post

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July 22, 2015
My All-Time Favorite Tip on How to Have a Consistent Prayer Life

Girl 1: “Hey girl, I’m going through a really hard time right now.” Girl 2: “Oh, really? I’m so sorry. What’s going on?” Girl 1: “Well…I’m just really struggling with some worry and fear in my life. I don’t know what to do.” Girl 2: “Oh man…that sounds really hard. I’ll definitely be praying for you. Girl 1: “Thank you so much. I need it.” Several weeks go by and Girl 2 has never prayed for Girl 1 even a single time. She meant to. She wanted to. She intended to. But it just slipped her mind. She completely forgot about her promise. Have you ever told someone youFull Post

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July 20, 2015
5 Truths to Help You Destroy Secret Sexual Sin

I wouldn’t be surprised if nearly every one of you reading this post has struggled with, or is currently struggling with, secret sexual sin. Why do I assume that so many of you struggle (or have struggled) with secret sexual sin? Because (at times) I’ve struggled with this in my own life and I’ve received enough emails through GirlDefined to know this is a big problem for many of you. I want you to know upfront that today can be a turning point in your life! I hate the thought of you feeling alone, helpless, or hopeless in your struggle. I’m writing about this topic today to offer youFull Post

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July 13, 2015
3 Quick Tips to Instantly Improve Your Personal Devotions

Do you feel like your personal devotional time is… A. Vibrant and really consistent. B. Pretty good, but could get better. C. Okay, but in need of some passion and consistency. D. Pretty irregular. And honestly, quite boring. E. It basically never happens. If you picked B or below, this post is for you. Keep reading. And guess what – this post is written for me too. I usually fall under the letter B. I’m forever striving to improve my quiet time. Since we’re in this boat together, I’m going to share 3 quick tips that have helped me instantly improve my personal devotion time over the years. They’reFull Post

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July 10, 2015
Where Will You Be 100 Million Years From Today?

I recently saw an image on facebook that I did not want to see. The image was graphic, heartbreaking, and extremely thought provoking. The image pictured several men only moments before they were brutally put to death by the wicked hands of ISIS. When I saw that picture my mind went wild. What if I were in their shoes? What if I were being put to death? Would I be ready? Although I didn’t want to see that image of those men preparing for death, I’m grateful I did. That image was a huge reminder of how short and shockingly fast life truly is. I realize this blog postFull Post

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July 3, 2015
How I Overcame Being Shy, Selfish, and Desperately Awkward

I was 15 years old, had a mouth full of braces and was desperately shy and awkward. Our whole family was involved in the AWANA program at our church and I had just started attending the high school program. The first week came and I sat by myself. I walked to game time by myself. I left by myself. The next week, the same thing happened. This went on for several months. I hated going. I hated feeling shy and uncomfortable. I hated not having any friends and feeling desperately alone. After several more weeks, I thought up a “brilliant” plan. Since, there was no getting out of going,Full Post

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July 1, 2015
You Don’t Have to be a Victim to Your Crazy Girl Emotions

During the past couple of months my life has been busy, busy, busy. My days have been filled with long hours of manuscript revisions, traveling, speaking, working in my dad’s office, visiting with relatives, and so much more. During all of this busyness, I’ve also been facing an emotionally confusing issue in a certain area of my life. Due to the combination of tiredness and busyness, I’ve been struggling to keep my thoughts and emotions under control. Typically, I can focus my mind on Scripture (or prayer) and my thoughts and emotions get in check pretty quickly. Not this time though. For some reason, I’ve been in need ofFull Post

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June 8, 2015
A Sure Fire Sign That You are a Foolish Girl

A few years ago, I was a foolish girl. I didn’t think I was at the time, but looking back I realize I was a fool with a capital F. There was season in my life when I lived out the “fool” part of this verse, “The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but a wise man listens to advice” (Proverbs 12:15). I wasn’t a fool in every area of life, but there was a particular area where I very strongly rejected any advice that did not line up with my own opinion. Here is how that verse looks on a twenty first century girl,Full Post

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June 3, 2015
A Love Story in the Mind

She was thirteen years old when she was noticed for the first time by a guy. Butterflies swarmed inside of her making her feel as if she was the most special thing in the world. She felt beautiful for the first time in her life, because no one had ever treated her like Austin did. Her parents were very Godly people and always tried their best to raise their kids the right way. However, they came from a worldly background before they came to know the Lord, so they were well aware of what the world and Satan had to offer for their children. Her parents warned her ofFull Post

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May 15, 2015
One Must-Have Recipe for Overcoming Sadness

In 1967, after graduating from high school, Joni had her fateful accident that would change her life forever. It was a hot July day so she decided to meet her sister Kathy and some friends at the beach in Chesapeake Bay to swim. They unloaded their stuff and settled down for a fun day of swimming. They didn’t waste any time getting into the water. Laughing and smiling, Joni took a big jump and dove into the sparkling fresh water. She immediately knew something was wrong. She couldn’t move her body. Everything went numb. Without realizing it, Joni dove head first onto a large rock that was hidden justFull Post

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May 13, 2015
Lust: A Christian Girl’s Problem Too

I have an honest confession. As a young high school girl, my heart was full of lust and I did very little to fight against it. One night, God got ahold of my heart and everything changed. I came across a little hardback book that blasted truth into my heart like never before. It’s the little book written by Josh Harris called, Sex is Not the Problem, Lust Is. Tears streamed down my face as I realized how wrong and sinful I had been. I felt dirty before a Holy and perfect God. I confessed my sin and asked Christ to forgive me. Was life perfect after that? NotFull Post

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May 1, 2015
How to Find Happiness When Your Heart’s Desire is Unfulfilled

“Rachel was a real knockout. Rachel undoubtedly knew that when it came to feminine charms, she had her sister Leah beat hands down. She must have relished the favor that was hers. She was so beautiful that when Jacob first laid eyes on her, he knew she was the one for him. In their first meeting she captured his heart, and he served her father fourteen years for her. In fact, he loved her so much that the years he spent working to secure her for himself ‘seemed to him but a few days’ (Gen. 29:20). That’s real devotion! With a beginning like this, you would think that theFull Post

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April 27, 2015
Letting Go of Pain and Suffering

When we look around at the circumstances of people in the world today, we discover that there is a vast amount of suffering and pain being endured. Many different people struggle with many different types of suffering. Hospitals are full of horrible diseases and injuries, parents are getting divorces, babies are being aborted, war is raging, people are being sold into slavery, drug abuse and alcoholism is affecting more and more people and the list goes ever on and on. People are hurting. Everyone is affected by suffering or pain at one point in their life. Iit may not be physical but everyone goes through tragedy. And when theyFull Post

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April 24, 2015
Why I Quit Trying to Make Everyone Like Me

A few weeks ago I did an online personality test with my younger sister Ellissa and a good friend of ours. Ellissa randomly came across a free online site and thought it would be fun to try it out. The website nailed each of our personalities. Mine was “entertainer.” Apparently I’m a total extrovert and thrive on being the life of the party. I think my family and most of my friends would agree with that. What struck me most during the survey was a hidden piece of my personality that came to light. The survey asked a question along the lines of, “do you worry about what peopleFull Post

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March 27, 2015
Do You Ever Feel Like God is a Cosmic Killjoy?

I can only imagine what pop culture would say if they read the GirlDefined blog. They would probably request that we be sent to the insane asylum for crazy thinking. In fact, some of you might think we are at the top of the crazy meter, too. Let me offer you some words of encouragement. We understand that the message of God Defined womanhood is not the norm. It’s not popular or cool, and it’s totally counter cultural. So what’s up with us being so counter cultural? Why are we so passionate about a message that is totally uncool?  Maybe this story will help you understand. “The story isFull Post

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March 11, 2015
Why Watching People Make Out Should be Awkward

The tension was building. Something big was about to happen. Everyone felt it. The romantic story had been a roller coaster of ups and downs, sorrows and joys. But something was about to change. As the young couple finally realized their passion for one another, it happened. They embraced one another and engaged in a full blown make out session. I sat there watching this climactic scene unfold. And…after about three seconds, I began to feel awkward. I glanced around the room to see if anybody else looked uncomfortable. Nothing. All eyes were locked on the screen. After what felt like an hour, the kissing finally stopped. I’ll beFull Post

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February 16, 2015
When Life is Tough Cling to This Truth

Every morning after my yawning, stretching, and rubbing of the eyes, I hop out of bed to see the carefully painted wood sign sitting atop my dresser. “It is well with my soul.” Those words to the familiar hymn stare back at me. As I read those piercing words, I feel a little tug at my heart as if they are reminding me to cling to the truth of their powerful message as I try to stay afloat during the craziness of the day. I love that familiar hymn, but all too often I am ashamed to say I struggle to believe those convicting lyrics. Let’s all be honest.Full Post

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February 11, 2015
When Romantic Fantasies Get the Best of You

I was at a major league baseball game recently with my grandparents when the strangest thing happened. As the game reached the ninth inning, an entire flock of teen and college age girls began swarming towards my section. They quickly formed a line right across the aisle from where I was sitting. Apparently they were lining up to get photos with some guy. I couldn’t figure out what was so special about this guy, so I asked one of the girls rushing past. She looked at me in slight shock and said. “It’s Juan Pablo Galavis!” I stared blankly back. “Who’s that?” I asked. She looked even more shocked. “He’sFull Post

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February 2, 2015
One Girl’s Journey from Brokenness to Beauty

Have you ever looked in the mirror and not liked what you saw? No matter how hard you tried your outfit, makeup, hair, etc. just didn’t look “good?” That’s me. I’m the girl who everyone thinks is confident, carefree, and knows God loves me. Mainly because I’m the pastor’s daughter (any PK’s out there?). I’m sure most of you have had this struggle too. It’s probably the most popular of all the “teenage-girl problems.” My hair is plain brown, no volume. My eyes are dull blue-ish grey, no pop. I’m short with absolutely NO curves whatsoever. For the past four years I’ve struggled with the fact that I’m notFull Post

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January 30, 2015
Getting God Off the Back Burner

I looked my husband in the eyes and told him how much I loved him. I said, “You are the most important person to me. I can’t imagine loving you any more than I already do. You are so valuable and special to me.” After my little time of sharing He said, “I love you too! Let’s get a cup of coffee and sit down and talk. I’d love to share my heart with you and hear what’s on your heart.” As much as I love Him, I looked back and said, “I am really busy . . . I just don’t have any time. I love you soFull Post

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January 19, 2015
6 Signs You’re Addicted to Instagram

Do you love Instagram or other photo sharing apps? Are you addicted to them? Let’s find out! Insert your favorite photo sharing app in the context below and see how you measure you. 1. You check Instagram first thing in the morning. You wake up from a good night’s sleep. Another great day. Before you even roll out of bed you glance over to your nightstand. There it is. You get your morning stretch in by reaching for your fully charged phone. Without even thinking you open up Instagram. You catch up on latest since you went to bed last night. You browse every photo until you’re completely caughtFull Post

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January 2, 2015
A Goal You Can’t Live Without

I pulled up to a coffee shop several days ago with my sister, Ellissa, for our weekly mentoring meeting. She graciously asked me to be her mentor earlier this year and we’ve had some incredible meetings over the past 6 months. As we prepared to get out of the car she began telling me about a really interesting New Years fact she heard about. She went on to tell me about the shocking difference someone discovered when they compared the top 3 New Year’s goals of the 1940’s to the top 3 New Year’s goals of today. Here’s what they look like: 2015: 1. Lose weight 2. Get moreFull Post

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December 22, 2014
What an Amish Guy Taught Me About Christmas

I was driving down the road the other day listening to one of our local Christian radio stations. The DJ asked people to call in and share something that helps them keep Christmas in its proper place. As I was listening, this lady called in from Pennsylvania and said she has several Amish friends in the area (she is not Amish). One evening during a Christmas party she was talking to one of the Amish guys and asked him how his family celebrates Christmas. He shared with her many of his favorite family traditions and how special each one was to him. She went on to ask if hisFull Post

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December 19, 2014
When Good Girls Do Dumb Things

It was a hot summer day a little over ten years ago, when Kristen and I decided to do a really dumb thing. Back in those days, we were known as the “good girls” and we thought we did a good job of measuring up to that reputation. In a way, we almost felt immune to doing bad things and never really imagined ourselves making any dumb decisions. We grew up in a Christian family, attended church regularly, were homeschooled, didn’t date around and actually liked our parents. We figured life was good, we were good and   we weren’t really capable of doing dumb things. Wrong!  Let’s getFull Post

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December 17, 2014
7 Deadly Sins You Should Run From

There are some things in life that are extremely tempting for me. There’s a Starbucks Coffee shop right down the street from where Zack and I live and their grande, decaf, no-whip mocha seems to call my name every time I drive by. If there was some way to justify it as “healthy” and budget friendly, I would probably drink several cups a day. Zack asked me a funny, but true question the other day. “Why do all the unhealthy food and drinks have to taste so good?! Why can’t a carrot or a piece of celery have the same taste-bud-explosion experience? It would be so much easier toFull Post

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December 15, 2014
Six Verses on Purity That Every Girl Should Know

I recently received an email from a girl asking me to send her Bible verses on the topic of purity. The girl said she vaguely knew that the Bible promoted purity and holiness, but that she wasn’t exactly sure where to find the passages. After I emailed her back with a list of verses I wondered if there were more girls out there like her. Girls who know that the Bible “promotes purity” but aren’t exactly sure where to find the passages in the Bible. If you are one of those girls who wants to fight for purity, keep reading. This blog post is written for you! Let’s beFull Post

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December 12, 2014
Why Christian Girls Should Be Beautiful but Not Seductive

Several months ago I wrote a controversial blog post that went viral and picked up a lot of positive and negative attention. It currently has over 730 comments and has reached over a million people. It’s called “Why Christian Girls Post Seductive Selfies.” If you’re interested, you can read it here. My main point was to bring up the question of why so many Christian girls post provocative, sensual and seductive selfies online. I challenged Christian girls to reevaluate their online images and ask themselves if what they’re posting is honoring to God. After reading through several hundred of the comments I began noticing a theme. People were makingFull Post

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December 8, 2014
When God Doesn’t Give You What You Desperately Want

Three and half years ago I stood at the altar of a beautiful church with a handsome groom across from me beaming from ear to ear. I was getting married (read more on that here) and everything in my life seemed absolutely perfect. I had a loving, wonderful, supportive family and was marrying into an equally awesome family. My soon-to-be husband had a great job with no fear or concern for financial struggles. I was experiencing top notch health and didn’t have a single ache or pain to be burdened by. My relationship with God was really good and I had an exciting future ahead of me. I actuallyFull Post

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December 5, 2014
It Takes a Tough Girl to Say These Words

I remember three very distinct times in my life that I had to be a tough girl. Once at age seventeen, twenty and twenty-four. When I was seventeen I’d been offered multiple full basketball scholarships to division one universities. Basketball was my passion and I loved playing. When I wasn’t playing basketball I was either talking about it, thinking about it or dreaming about it. In my junior year of high school the university basketball coaches needed an answer from me and I had to give them my final decision. After many hours of prayer and long discussions with my parents, the answer was crystal clear. I didn’t acceptFull Post

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December 3, 2014
Is it Wrong to Be Angry at God?

I held her little furry body in one hand as she licked my face. This tiny puppy had me at “ruh-roh.” She was so small and yet so full of life. I looked at my husband, Zack, and he knew I was sold. “I guess this means we’re taking the puppy.” He said to the owner. We exchanged money and paperwork and before I knew it I was holding a 1 lb., 8 week old Maltipoo puppy on my lap as we drove home. She was my early Christmas present. “I just love her!” I said with a huge smile as her big black eyes looked into mine. “SheFull Post

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November 26, 2014
Are You a Whiner or a Worshiper? {Free Book Giveaway}

I quietly walked up the stairs and peeked inside my friends bedroom. The lights were dimmed and she was asleep. I tip-toed over to her bed and whispered, “surprise” as I held up her favorite Starbucks drink in my hand. She smiled up at me and then slowly sat up. From the outside, she looked as sweet, beautiful and joyful as I always remembered, but on the inside she is in terrible pain. The doctors have exhausted their level of knowledge and have told her multiple times that “we don’t know what else to do.”  Despite the doctors’ words of hopelessness and lack of answers, my friend, Grace, hasFull Post

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November 17, 2014
5 Truths to Combat “Out-of-Control” Emotions

Sarah checked her outfit in the mirror, grabbed her purse and headed out the door. She had been planning and preparing for homecoming night for months and couldn’t wait to meet up with her friends. She arrived at school only to find Jake, her crush, laughing and chatting it up with some of the most popular girls in school. Sarah’s emotions ran wild with jealousy and she found herself sulking the entire night. She couldn’t help but wonder if Jake “liked” one of those girls and would soon forget that she existed. Sarah’s emotions were out-of-control when it came to guys. When guys noticed her she was happy, whenFull Post

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September 24, 2014
Confessions of a Skinny Obsessed Girl

There I was, waking up every morning with a new resolve to not eat as much as I did the day before. I was determined to eat less so I didnʼt gain weight, but every day it seemed like I failed. My thoughts as I stood in front of the mirror went something like this: “Why can’t I just be skinny? I would be so much happier if I was as thin as a Gap model. I’m not going to eat anything till dinner, and when it comes, I’m going to have bird size portions.” I hated thinking this way, but I felt helpless. I would remind myself thatFull Post

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September 17, 2014
Why Peer Pressure will Make or Break You

I was fifteen years old and surrounded by my girl friends at a sleepover party. The birthday girl stands up and announces that we’re all going to watch a movie. She says the name of the movie and my heart immediately sinks. This movie was bad news. What’s worse, I knew specifically that my parents did not want me to see it. All the girls cheered as my friend popped it into her VHS player. I didn’t want to look dumb by leaving the room or worse, announcing that “my parents wouldn’t approve.” Instead, I caved into peer pressure like a little mute mouse and silently watched the film.Full Post

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September 12, 2014
How to Not Have an Abortion Some Day

Rachel was a Christian girl from a conservative family. She grew up in church and went to all the Christian conferences. As she grew older, she decided she didn’t like the straight and narrow path of the Christian life, so she ventured out to try some worldly “fun.” After several bad friendships, parties, and guys, she woke up one morning and found herself pregnant. Shocked and embarrassed, she didn’t know what to do. Becoming a single mother had never been in her plans…but here she was. Her life came to a fork in the road and she had to make a choice.  Rachel hated the idea of getting anFull Post

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September 5, 2014
The Secret that Tormented Me

Long long ago when Kristen and I were just young girls, living at home, enjoying life and building tree forts, we stumbled upon a secret that kept us tormented for weeks. Kristen asked my mom to type in the internet passcode on our big old desktop computer (laptops weren’t really a thing back in those dinosaur days). It just so happened that my moms fingers were greasy from the food that she was eating and the grease left marks on each key she pressed. Kristen was a smart little whip and wrote down the letters on each greasy key and called me over to help decipher the code. OurFull Post

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September 3, 2014
3 Side Effects of Loving Yourself

I was driving down the road the other day when I suddenly hit a bunch of traffic. I was in a hurry and not in the mood to be generous to any intruding cars trying to merge into my lane. As one car tried to squeeze their way in front of me, I reluctantly slowed down and let them over out of sheer Christian obligation. I wasn’t excited about it. Ever been there? Not too long before that I was with a large group of people and pulled out my pack of gum to grab a quick piece. Instead of offering a piece to everyone in the group, IFull Post

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August 29, 2014
Mind-Virgin: Saving More than Just Your Body

I walked down the long aisle in my beautiful silk dress. My heart pounded with excitement as I locked eyes with my handsome husband-to-be. He beamed from ear to ear as I slowly approached him. This was the day, the moment we had been anticipating for the past eight months. We were both raised in Christian homes and were taught from a young age that saving sex for marriage was the Biblical and right thing to do. The anticipation of giving the gift of virginity to one another was overwhelmingly exciting. There we stood on our wedding day – both virgins and looking as pure and as perfect asFull Post

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August 6, 2014
Self-Esteem: Why Christian Girls Don’t Need it

Meet Jenny. She’s a tall and lanky high school girl who wishes she was shorter and prettier. Jenny hates the way she looks. She’s never had a boyfriend and blames it on the fact that she’s too tall and too ugly. Years of bitterness and anger turn Jenny into a depressed young woman. Her parents decide to take her to a counselor. After hearing about her problems, the counselor explained to Jenny that she suffered from having low self-esteem. The counselor said that the solution to this problem is to simply love and accept herself more. Like Jenny, millions of girls around the world are struggling with similar feelingsFull Post

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July 25, 2014
Chocolate Covered Sin

The lights were off and we could hear our dad making his way to bed. Bethany and I pretended like we were asleep as he poked his head into our bedroom. After several minutes of lying there, I leaned over to Bethany and whispered, “the coast is clear.” We slowly opened our bedroom door and looked to the right and left. Our parents’ door was shut for the night and all of our siblings were fast asleep. We tiptoed quietly to the kitchen and gently pulled the freezer door open. This was it – the moment we had been planning for all night. I reached inside and carefully grabbedFull Post

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July 23, 2014
Bored, Single and Still Living at Home

This goes out to all the single girls still living at home! I sat down on a lawn chair on our pool deck. The summer wind blew in my hair and the sun shined warm rays on my face. I took a deep breath and a sip of my sweet tea. I stretched my legs out and wiggled my toes. Everything was quiet and peaceful. This was the beginning of a beautiful lazy afternoon and a perfect time to finish my book. I guess my mom had other plans. She loudly pushed open the screen door disrupting the fantasy world of my book. “Lisa! I’m gonna need your helpFull Post

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July 7, 2014
God, Please Don’t Mess Up My Dreams

Three years ago I sat in a doughnut shop with some friends and had a conversation that  I will never forget. I ended up in a heated debate over the topic of marriage and motherhood. My responses during that debate would mostly likely have been a shock to you considering what this GirlDefined: Getting Back to God’s Design blog is all about. As surprising as this may sound, I (in so many words) told this person that marriage and motherhood wasn’t enough for my future. I said that I could not be happy unless I was heavily involved in this ministry or something similar. Although I didn’t say theseFull Post

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July 4, 2014
Are You a Bratty American?

From the time they were born their families despised them. Their parents hated them and hoped they would die. These two feeble sisters were born into a poverty stricken home with barely enough food to survive. Not only were they starving, but they lived in a world of scary darkness. Both sisters were born completely blind. These two Cambodian girls endured years of physical and verbal abuse from their parents. Having an incurable disability immediately classified them as “trash” in their country. Nobody loved them. Nobody wanted them. At one point during their youth, their parents took them to the center of the jungle and left them there to die.Full Post

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June 23, 2014
Don’t You Have a Life?

Hi! I guess I should introduce myself to you beautiful people. My name is Lisa Hallahan, I am the daughter to two wonderful parents and the oldest sister (but second born) to 6 amazing siblings! We live on a 20 acre ranch in Montana and have plenty of animals, plenty of laughs, and like everyone else, we have had our share of trials as well. We own and operate a web design business from home and our finances are never stable.  My dad is mentally disabled, but loved and cared for by my mom and loving kids. Mom is the CEO, Sales Manager, Home-school Teacher, Counselor, Chef, Ranch operator, andFull Post

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April 3, 2014
Candace Made the Choice

Earlier this year I told you a story about a girl named Candace. She was born without any limbs. That’s right, no arms and no legs. Shockingly enough, Candace was able to give thanks to God for her life despite the fact that she was limbless. Read the full story here: Candace – The Girl Without Limbs. The story of Candace still amazes me even to this day. I often put myself in Candace’s place and imagine having her life. What would life be like without arms and legs? Could I give thanks to God if I were limbless like Candace? Although Candace is limbless, I think each oneFull Post

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August 16, 2013
God, I don’t Understand

“God, I don’t understand why my parents got divorced.” “God, I don’t understand why I’m still single.” “God, I don’t understand why we had to move across the country.” “God, I don’t understand why my parents have such strict rules for me.” “God, I don’t understand why my family is on such a tight budget.” I vividly remember a time in my life when I had my very own “I don’t understand why” moment. I was nineteen going on twenty when God allowed a guy to enter the scene of my life. I met this guy (let’s call him Nate) at my church’s young adult Bible study. Slowly butFull Post

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August 9, 2013
10 Signs Your Phone is an Idol

Have you ever had one of those moments where you wish you could rewind the time and do things differently? I had one of those moments several weeks ago. I was running late and needed to grab a quick birthday present for my little sister. I zoomed to Old Navy and found a few cute shirts for her and then hurried home to get to the party on time. I set my bags down and reached into my purse to grab my phone. It wasn’t there. I ran outside and checked in the car, but it wasn’t there either. I had a sinking feeling in my stomach. I mustFull Post

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February 24, 2013
Candice – The Girl Without Limbs

Candace is a beautiful and vibrant young lady. She is well known in her church for her contagious smile and joyful attitude. One Sunday as Candace was sitting in the back row of her church, her pastor asked the small congregation to share one thing for which they were grateful. Candace leaned forward and caught the attention of her pastor. He looked at her and asked her what she was grateful for. She looked back with a big smile and said “I am so grateful that God has given me a really great nose.” Everyone in the congregation knew exactly why Candace was thanking God for her nose. TheyFull Post

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January 23, 2013
Emily’s Enticing Temptation

Emily tightly gripped the folded piece of paper in her hand as she sat down at her desk. Her history class was starting and the big mid-term test was haunting her. The teacher gave a few opening words for the day and then passed out the mid-terms to each student. Emily’s mouth went dry as she flipped her paper over and scanned the first ten questions. She slowly unfolded the small piece of paper in her hand while glancing around to make sure she was unnoticed. Her heart rate doubled and her palms started to sweat as her eyes scanned the secret paper. One of her friends had handedFull Post

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June 25, 2012
Help! I’m a Facebook addict.

With over 500 million users, Facebook is now used by 1 in every 13 people on earth, with over 250 million of them (over 50%) who log in every single day. Over 700 billion minutes are spent on Facebook every month. With statistics like that, you probably have a facebook page of your own. How much time do you spend on Facebook every hour – day – week – month? What exactly are you doing on your Facebook page each time you log in? Have you ever thought about it? Maybe you’re updating your status, posting a comment, uploading pictures from your vacation or chatting with friends. The bottomFull Post

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April 19, 2012
Find out if You’re a Slave to Your Phone

Julie and I hadn’t seen each other in several months. She was back in town and we were headed to dinner. We got our food and sat down at a booth and I asked her what she had been up to the past few months. She was excited to fill me in on all of the latest updates about family, friends, guys, school and church. I listened intently as she told me about her life. She finished all of her updates and asked me to fill her in on my latest. She was looking at her phone while I was talking to her.  I started talking about my friendshipsFull Post

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April 2, 2012
The Latest Movie Fads

The Hunger Games, Twilight, Harry Potter… All of your friends are talking about the latest movies and books. You don’t want to feel left out so you read the books and hit up the theater. You’re not sure if they’re the best things to read and watch… but everyone is doing! It must be okay, right? As young Christian women, how do we evaluate whether certain books and movies are honoring to Christ? What about popular movies like Harry Potter, Twilight and now The Hunger Games? Is there a way to determine if these books and movies are something we should devote our time to? God cares a lotFull Post

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