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Why Suicide is Never the Right Solution

By: Kristen Clark

The news of Kate Spade committing suicide broke my heart. The reality of suicide is a sobering and tragic act that leaves behind more questions than solutions. Most of us will never know the depth of personal struggles that Kate was facing, but we know that she was hurting. She felt hopeless. For her, the only solution that seemed right was to end her life.

In the wake of her tragic suicide (and others like it), the media is never quite sure how to respond. It’s a confusing puzzle. Why would someone as beautiful and talented and successful as Kate want to end her life? From a billion dollar business to international fame, she was a woman who seemingly had it all. So why…?

We may never know the answer to that question. I don’t know her personally and so I will not try to figure out her motives. Only God knows the depths of her heart. But what I do know is that she was hurting so bad, with no hope, that suicide became a viable solution in her eyes.

With sincere compassion and grace, please hear me when I say this — suicide is never the right solution.

No matter how hopeless, painful, and alone someone may feel, suicide doesn’t solve the real problem. It launches a person into eternity while leaving behind a trail of incredible confusion and suffering for family and friends. It doesn’t fix things; it only leaves them more broken and shattered.

When contemplating the harsh reality of suicide in light of Kate Spade’s permanent choice, it’s critical that we think about these things biblically. We must view these tough issues from a biblical worldview, or we will be left with no hope as well.

First, God created humans — we are not autonomous.

We are not the source of truth and law. We are not the judge. God is the one who determines life and death. He is the Creator. “The Bible teaches that it is Jehovah who made us, and not we ourselves (Psalm 100:3). All people belong to the Creator (Ezekiel 18:4), and He has the “right” over them (cf. Genesis 2:7; Romans 9:21). Humanity is responsible to God.”1

Second, life is a gift from God.

The Bible makes it abundantly clear that life is a gift from God (Acts 17:25; 1 Timothy 6:13). He is the reason we exist. He is the one who gives us breath and life. As John Piper says, “Our bodies — their life, their death — belong to Christ. He bought them. They are not ours to dispose of as we will. They are his. And they exist for his will, and his glory.”2

Third, suicide is self-murder.

God is the creator of life and light. His arch-enemy, the Devil, is the promoter of death and darkness (John 10:10). Murder (regardless of why or how it happens) is an act of evil and is prohibited by God (Exodus 20:13; Romans 13:9). We will never know the deepest pain and motives of someone committing suicide, but “it is estimated that more than 90% of suicide victims are considered to be normal, sane persons.”3 Suicide is the final act of desperation for someone who is looking to themselves for escape rather than turning to their Creator for hope.

Fourth, we aren’t enough, but God is.

In and of ourselves, we aren’t enough to solve life’s deepest pains and sorrows. We aren’t enough to free ourselves from guilt and shame. That is why Jesus came to this earth. To offer us hope, life, and forgiveness from sin (John 3:16). In Him we have hope. In Him we can experience freedom. In Him, there is always a reason to live. John 8:32 says, “Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”

Lastly, Jesus offers hope that suicide doesn’t.

As one author puts it, “[Jesus] is waiting for you to allow Him to speak into your life with Truth, love and hope. “Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you at the proper time, casting all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you” (1 Peter 5:6-7). He is waiting for you to give Him your life and accept His gift of salvation, or perhaps you’ve already accepted that gift and He’s waiting for you to hand over control so He can lead you out of the darkness of despair to the beautiful, glimmering light of hope.”4

Regardless of how hopeless, lost, confused, or hurting someone may be, suicide isn’t the right answer.

It doesn’t truly solve any problems or fix the brokenness. It only adds to it. “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly” (John 10:10) Jesus offer life and in Him there is a path to healing. He offers a path toward restoration. No amount of pain, guilt, shame, or sorrow is too great that the cross is not greater still.

God loves you and sees you. He cares about you. In Him you have immense worth and value. Nothing this world has to offer is enough to satisfy the deepest longings in our soul. As tragic and heartbreaking as Kate Spade’s suicide is, may this be a sobering reminder that success and wealth cannot fix the brokenness in our hearts. Only Jesus can do that.

If you or someone you know is contemplating suicide, please reach out for help immediately:

National Hopeline Network: 1-800-SUICIDE
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-TALK
For hearing and speech impaired with TTY equipment: 1-800-799-4TTY
Español: 1-888-628-9454

For additional help and guidance, I encourage you to take some time to read the following articles:

Is Suicide the Answer?

Why Should I Not commit Suicide?

Can a Christian Commit Suicide?

Is Someone You Love Suicidal?

Helping My Friend Who’s Suicidal

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NOTES:

  1. 1. https://www.christiancourier.com/articles/1339-is-suicide-the-answer
  2. 2. https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/we-are-not-our-own
  3. 3. https://412teens.org/qna/why-should-I-not-commit-suicide.php
  4. 4. https://412teens.org/qna/why-should-I-not-commit-suicide.php

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16 Responses to Why Suicide is Never the Right Solution

  1. Anya says:

    It’s really terrible what happened. While reading this, I think about my sister who attempted suicide because of marriage problems. I thank God those attempts failed and she eventually manage to reach for help, from counselors and friends that eventually led her to be honest to us and told us the truth about her marriage. It broke my heart. Then years later, I went through the same thing, was betrayed, and that just broke my heart even more. Too broken I didn’t know what to do. I could only pray, and ask Him to lead the way. I was hopeless, I feel like dying, but I know God is still alive in me. Somewhere. I was too broken and blind to see. But then, God told me to move forward, one step at a time, and He restored our relationship and gave healing for the both of us.

    When I look back at all those struggles, I am glad to say that I am now in a state where I no longer live in shame or guilt over the past. If someone had asked me “Is there any chapter in your life that you’d like to erase?” I would say no. Humans may intend harm for others, but God can intend them for good. The hardest storm had taught me that precious lesson.
    I thank God for the darkness, because then His light can shine even brighter in my life.

    If you’re struggling right now, I pray that you will be given strength to walk one step at a time. Remind yourself everyday that even when you can’t, God can, and HE LIVES IN YOU. Remind yourself that even if you fail, God loves you still and that He’s working things out more than you can comprehend. It’s okay to feel hopeless, because it’s time to put your hope in God instead. It’s okay to cry along the way, God sees every tear, but there are times that you should not give in to negative thoughts, because you are strong enough to get through this. And most of all, I pray that you will feel and always encourage the ever-present of the Holy Spirit guiding you through and through, so that at the end of the day you’ll know, that you are never alone to begin with, and you will never be alone in this fight.

  2. Shanae B says:

    It’s never a good thing to play god with your own or someone else’s life. Very good response to this situation!

  3. Claire T says:

    Thank you for writing this! I’m glad that you saw my email 🙂

  4. whitefamily says:

    This post was so timely; thank you for taking the time to write it. Just recently, an acquaintance of ours committed suicide. It was so tragic and shocking I hardly knew what to think. My heart just breaks for the family and friends left behind! I’ve decided the best way to be of help is to commit the family in prayer. God is the greatest comforter.

  5. C says:

    Sorry but I hardly found this article to offer any hope whatsoever. It offers too much of a practical, non sympathetic approach to a very deep, emotional issue. At least some issue on the topic of suicide should’ve been performed before writing this article. The writing almost seems to be condemning and shaming the one who is tempted by suicide as if they are at fault. If dismissing the thought of suicide was as simple as simply believing the truths (which I agree with) in the article, then the suicide rate would be lower. But it’s not. What’s failed to mention in the article is that God meets us in our highest point and He meets us at our lowest point. We don’t have to have it all together. We don’t have to have constant faith in Him. Our trust is going to waver. We’re human. Even David suffered with depression but the Lord was with Him. If anyone who is struggling with depression or suicidal thoughts, I would highly recommend looking up Ben Courson on instagram or YouTube. He struggled with depression and suicidal thoughts for 10 years and offers so much hope. And Kirsten and Bethany, please research these topics thoroughly so you can truly empathize with what we feel or don’t write about these topics at all. They are very sensitive. Thanks.

    • Natalie says:

      Thank you! I could not believe how callous and thoughtless this article was. Maybe people who commit suicide are victims of other people in their lives, we do not know the full story. These girls should not be writing about topics unless they are fully informed.

    • GirlDefined says:

      Hey C, thanks for your comment. We care very, very much about the person who is contemplating suicide. We have experienced the heartache of several family friends who have committed suicide and it is extremely hard.

      The intentional purpose of this article was to bring a Biblical perspective on the topic of suicide. It was written to be more of an informative piece to help readers understand how to think about this relevant issue rightly. However, we are working on a follow-up post that will be directed more for the person who is struggling with suicide. Thanks for reading and commenting.

  6. Jason Garrick Shirtz says:

    Regrettably, even from a “biblical perspective” there is not a clear answer on God’s views on suicide. There is no scripture of the bible that specifically condones the taking of one’s own life. Additionally, there are just the seven suicides listed in the bible narrative. They are:

    The suicide of:
    1. Abimelech in Judges 9:54
    2. Samson in Judges 6:30
    3. Saul in 1 Sam 31:4
    4. Saul’s armor bearer in 1 Sam 31:5
    5. Ahithophel in 2 Sam 17:23
    6. Zimri in 1 Kings 16:18
    7. Judas after betraying Jesus. (multiple accounts in the NT)

    That leads us to a problem from a “use of scripture as a guide to the will of God” problem, because of these seven scriptures, only one of which is in the NT, which due to the “NT > OT” understanding of the gospel in most mainstream Christian denomoniations gives us very little scriptural guidance to work with.

    Of the 6 suicides in the OT, only two of which are of persons of any major note in the biblical narrative Saul, and Samson.
    Further compounding the issue scripturally, is that many notable Christian leaders have a sympathetic view of Samson’s suicide. (namely Saint Augustine and St. Thomas Aquinas.) On top of that, in the view of the Jews at the time of Saul’s death by means of falling on his own sword was considered more or less an “honorable” means of avoiding capture and degradation by Israel’s military enemies, the philistines.

    Overall, the idea that suicide is an “unpardonable sin” is an idea without direct biblical support, and one that does not have the full support of major historical and current Christian church leaders. So all that being said, I don’t think this article is in the right for framing the issue of suicide as “never the answer” with the weight of scriptural authority. If that’s someone’s person opinion fine, but claiming it as a proven biblical truth is just not supportable by the actual biblical text

    • Faith says:

      Im sorry but i whole heartedly disagree with you. The bible may have never directly said that “suicide is a sin” but it has said that our bodies are not our own but belong to the Holy Spirit (1 Corinthians 6:19). We don’t have the right to end our life and do harm to our bodies (which aren’t really our own to begin with) no matter how hard and no matter how much struggling we have in life because God has promised us NUMEROUS of times that not only is he with us but he will bring us out of our despair into a much better place (Proverbs 3:25-26; Psalms 37:24). If one truly believes in Christ power, that alone can sustain him in any situation (Phillipians 4:11-13). The reason someone commits suicide is because they want to escape the pain, they don’t believe it can get better, and/or don’t want to face anymore challenges of life. They think they are all ALONE. It’s all “I” but they forget that they are not truly alone. No one said it was easy, I’ve even battled with depression and suicide contemplation but you cannot yield to Satan’s power no matter how hard it gets. I hate to sound so blunt but if you end your life, it means you don’t trust God nor believe in his promises. When I started TRULY believing in God’s promises for my life, it was easier to live and to be happy because he’s told me that he has something better for me more than my expectations (Ephesians 3:20).

    • Jason Garrick Shirtz says:

      Faith, while that combination of scriptures may provide an argument against suicide that is self-evident to you, they do not provide an argument that is self-evident to Christianity as a whole. If it were, there would be no room for debate within the Christian community on this matter…. And the fact of the matter is that there is plenty of debate on this matter in the Christian community not only on this matter, but on plenty of other issues that are not directly spelled out in the Bible.

      I’m fine with you disagreeing on the interpretation on scripture. all I’m asking is for the recognition that your one particular view of scripture, may possibly be wrong, and that you recognize that there are more than one schools of thought on the subject, and that Christians have the right to disagree with each other on BIG doctrinal issues like this.

  7. bkbxby says:

    i’m offended by suicide because it’s against the word of god.

  8. Camille Hui Hang says:

    jesus isn’t going to help people who are to the point of wanting to commit suicide. there are a lot of factors that go into a person killing themselves but let me say asking jesus to save you won’t do crap (i really wanted to swear). i’m going to focus on one factor that plays into suicide is depression, or more specifically, clinical depression. with clinical depression there is usually a chemical imbalance in the brain where there isn’t enough serotonin being released. when this happens it causes, to put dumbly, people to be sad for long periods of time. jesus can’t fix a chemical imbalance. people who have clinical depression feel hopeless, they don’t care whether they live or die. jesus isn’t hope. there can’t be hope in the eyes of the person who so desperately wants to die. so, instead of shouting that suicide is a sin (which most definitely won’t help) what you can do is do your research on these types of things, become educated, infuse your beliefs into your blog, then boom, successful religious blog. i am not religious, just putting that out there but what you can do is explain how being depressed isn’t a sin. humans are humans and will become depressed which can lead to clinical depression. explain how, because of jesus, you will love them unconditionally and don’t force jesus upon them. don’t tell them they aren’t enough, but god is because they already don’t feel enough. explain how you can help someone through god’s love for the person suffering, not how turning to god will help for the person because they don’t care. man, i haven’t even gotten into other causes of suicide, but please do some research on the topic before you write about it. and always remember, everyone’s motives are different, but the thing that matters is being by their side the entire time.

  9. Mary Bey says:

    What about physician assisted suicide? I think that is definitely acceptable especially if you are aware of the horrific medical conditions that exist in the world.

    • Shanae B says:

      This site has a post on the topic of assisted suicide, type those two words in the sherch. The post is from June of 2016.

  10. NoName says:

    Love the overall idea of this post. Suicide is never the right answer. Hold onto hope if you’ve got it, and don’t let it go for anybody. You’re a beautiful, talented, amazing person NO. MATTER. WHAT. You have so much to live for, and people say “oh it’ll get better” but it’s true. Trust someone who’s been there, done that. It DOES get better. You are good for something and you have a purpose on this earth. Don’t let problems, deadlines and commitments, and other people get in your way of happiness. You govern your life, not your problems, not your stress, not your haters and not your bullies. I have a type of love for everyone, regardless of their gender identity, sexuality, religion, race, label, positions, etc. Each and every person out there is beautiful and you shouldn’t take your beauty away from the world.
    Have a wonderful day/night. ❤️


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